Messages

151

General Chat / Re: Now you can finally know

« on: September 24, 2015, 02:58:26 PM »

I gave you all that crap about changing your name and this entire time it was actually the government's fault? I apologize, man.

152

Mario Chat / Re: The Silly Mario Fan Theories Thread

« on: September 12, 2015, 01:08:35 AM »

If Miyamoto invented Bowser Jr. it's fairly accurate for him to consider himself Bowser Jr.'s mother, in an artist/creation sort of way.

153

Mario Chat / Re: The Silly Mario Fan Theories Thread

« on: September 02, 2015, 07:27:32 PM »

A free Thwomp leaps
on the back of the wind
and floats downstream
till the current ends
and dips his spike
in the orange sun rays
and dares to claim the sky.

But a Thwomp that stalks
down his narrow cage
can seldom see through
his bars of rage
his spikes are clipped and
his body is bound
so he opens his throat to grunt.

The caged Thwomp grunts
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged Thwomp
grunts of freedom.

The free Thwomp thinks of another breeze
and the trade winds soft through the sighing trees
and the fat plumbers waiting on a dawn bright lawn
and he names the sky his own

But a caged Thwomp stands on the grave of dreams
his shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
his spikes are clipped and his body is bound
so he opens his throat to grunt.

The caged Thwomp grunts
with a fearful trill   
of things unknown   
but longed for still   
and his tune is heard   
on the distant hill   
for the caged Thwomp
grunts of freedom.


I Know Why The Caged Thwomp Grunts, by Lizard Dude

154

Mario Chat / Re: The Silly Mario Fan Theories Thread

« on: September 02, 2015, 07:10:02 PM »

Here's Bird Person saying the caged Thwomp is green because of the light nine years ago:

The "green" one is probably green due to a glow.

155

Video Game Chat / Re: New Super 3DS Bros

« on: September 01, 2015, 02:02:47 AM »

Holy.

I can play 3DS again without puking whenever I look at the screen.

I can honestly say the New 3DS XL was the biggest waste of money I've ever committed in my life. It wasn't a waste because I didn't use it. It was a waste because it took the 3DS from being my favorite system that I played every day and carried on my person at all times when I left the house to being a system I haven't played one bit since a few weeks after transferring my data/account to the New 3DS XL.

Now where the **** is Rhythm Heaven: The Best +

156

Video Game Chat / Re: Final Fantasy

« on: August 14, 2015, 11:10:33 AM »

I've played everything.

FFIX is the actual best.

But sometimes as an Au Ra runs her soft lips down your cheek you'll swear FFXIV is the best.

157

Game Help / Re: Nintendo DS Learning Curve - Control Pad?

« on: August 03, 2015, 10:47:25 AM »

I got all 150 Stars using the thumb nub. It took a long time to master but once you did it was definitely superior to the d-pad. The only other game that I remember that had nub-sticking was Rayman DS.

158

General Chat / Re: Ultimate Birthday Compilation

« on: July 23, 2015, 10:47:33 AM »

Happy birthday, Max Vance.

159

Video Game Chat / Re: Let's review...

« on: July 13, 2015, 08:52:56 PM »

I admire and respect how from beginning to end, the Arkham series never abandoned its beloved core mechanic: tapping A to slowly remove grates.

160

Video Game Chat / Re: Satoru Iwata has died.

« on: July 13, 2015, 08:17:31 PM »

Since it was cancer-related and he was wealthy I'm sure he had some idea that this was coming. Now, imagine spending what you know to be your last few weeks alive being yelled at by Internet nerds about the existence of Federation Force. Jesus. No one deserves that fate, least of all Iwata-san. RIP dude. :(

161

General Chat / Re: It's been quite a while since I last was here... What happened to this place?

« on: July 09, 2015, 11:42:02 PM »

Don't be too jelly, but I've touched the actual dog.

I'm also credited as the first "spread" on the Know Your Meme page although they got the name of the YTMND wrong. It also repeatedly calls Markio "Mariko".

162

General Chat / Re: I think it's about time ... we saw each other.

« on: July 02, 2015, 01:50:59 AM »

Howling II: Your Sister Is a Weeaboo

163

Video Game Chat / Re: E3 Thread: 2015 Edition

« on: June 25, 2015, 03:01:06 AM »

I in no way care about "the Metroid issue" but that Reggie spiel is pure unfiltered grade-A steaming bull[dukar].

Xenoblade Chronicles X and Yoshi's Wooly World and Shin Megami Tensei X Fire Emblem, hmm, where have I seen those hot E3 games before...

Oh that's right THE NINTENDO DIRECT FROM JANUARY 2013

164

Mario Chat / Re: Mario & Luigi & Paper

« on: June 22, 2015, 03:02:32 AM »

A few things:

And accusing the Paper Mario series of being repetitive when the third out of four games was already a massive change-up is pretty bull.

I accused M&L of being repetitive. I commended PM for NOT being repetitive.

At least MMBN gave ol' Megs a piddly weak buster gun to chip away at enemies if you had no battle chips on hand. This game gives you zlich.

You get some random basic stickers if your inventory runs out.

A: For some reason you can't pick your target in battle, and B: All of the enemies' HP is combined into one big bar. [...] this had to have a been a conscious decision on the part of the development team [...] Can anybody help me out on this? Anybody at all?

Both A and B stem from the same "conscious decision": to treat each group of enemies in a battle as one 'unit'. Thus, there's only one thing to target and one health bar. Yes the individual enemies do have their own health so the 'unit' still looses attacks as you damage it. I'm not really defending this choice, but that's the philosophy behind the stuff that's confusing you.

And if you do, you have to go all the way back the place where you found the item, get another one, then pay that one Toad a bunch of coins to have it turned into a sticker again. Or just buy the item from that sketchy Toad for even more coins. That is some bull[dukar].

True.

165

Video Game Chat / Re: E3 Thread: 2015 Edition

« on: June 18, 2015, 12:57:00 AM »

Looking at the neoGAF thread from immediately after the conference is making me LOL my butt off:

I invited a friend of mine who used to be a Nintendo fan to watch this with me. I felt like I was inviting her to see this mutual friend of us she doesn't hang out with nowadays, and I tried to rekindle the friendship, telling her he's a very cool, funny guy...and he shows up drunk out of his mind in his Mario themed underwear.

I think, I will never ever buy anything Nintendo again. And I have been a loyal fan up to the Wii.

You people remind me of a beaten housewife coming back for more again and again.

The party is over, people, go home.

I was literally shaking with anger during that conference. Tears formed in my eyes and my fists were clenched. "Announce something," I shrieked at my computer. My mom knocked on my bedroom door and had to ask if I was ok. Then, they started showing me a bunch of losers playing instruments dressed as Mario and I just turned it off. It was actually unbelievable.

Now, I'm 31 years old and this was, without a doubt, the worst conference I've ever seen in my life. It's clear that Nintendo is not just done with the Wii U but done with the company. There is no recovering from a conference that bad. They'll talk about the NX at next E3, but people will ignore it after remembering Blast Balls.

I loved this company and put my heart and soul into dedicating my gaming life to them. But now, I have nothing. I'm an empty shell.