Author Topic: ShadowBrian's Harem (Read 28338 times)

CrossEyed7 · « **on:** June 08, 2009, 03:43:22 AM »

Quote from: ShadowBrain on May 31, 2009, 10:10:13 PM

New thread proposal: People post pictures of girls and I critique.

First up: Leslie Swan, localization manager for most major Nintendo games and voice of Peach and Mona (who she kind of looks like).

Glorb · « **Reply #1 on:** June 08, 2009, 07:12:11 AM »

Oh god she looks exactly like my friend's sister I don't like this thread very much anymore.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #2 on:** June 08, 2009, 07:30:28 AM »

Well, after all, it's not "Glorb's Harem". Of course, I was personally holding out for "ShadowBrain's Harem", but since whoever "ShadowBrian" is isn't around, I'll fill in for him.

As for Swan, well, well... I wouldn't put her picture up on my wall, but I'll certainly never watch her name lazily scroll past in game credits quite the same again.

Glorb · « **Reply #3 on:** June 08, 2009, 07:59:45 AM »

One of the pioneering female emcees, MC Lyte represents Brooklyn, and could probably kill you with her bare hands.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #4 on:** June 08, 2009, 10:45:31 AM »

Here's some asian woman throwing a baseball. Critique after critiquing MC.

Rao · « **Reply #5 on:** June 08, 2009, 11:17:21 AM »

Ami and Yumi from Hai Hai Puffy AmiYumi.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #6 on:** June 10, 2009, 04:28:44 PM »

MC Lyte: I'm no racist, but I generally tend to like my girls like I like my clouds and vanilla ice cream. That being said, I'm gonna call "butterface" on this one.

Asian woman throwing a baseball: If that's legit, I'm getting season tickets and a pair of binoculars.

The Sisters Puffy: Wait, I thought that was some lame animated show... well, shows you what I know. Anyway, their ages being indeterminable to my eyes, I'll hold off on any majorly provocative comments and just say this: Garish and unconventional, yet endearing (to a point).

Lizard Dude · « **Reply #7 on:** June 10, 2009, 04:39:44 PM »

I remember in the old days we didn't know which sex Leslie Swan was.

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #8 on:** June 10, 2009, 04:51:59 PM »

Critique. Nao.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #9 on:** June 10, 2009, 04:54:46 PM »

That medallion draws attention to all the right places. Not sure why she's got that pretty head of her's leaning over, though.

TEM · « **Reply #10 on:** June 11, 2009, 10:29:37 AM »

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #11 on:** June 11, 2009, 04:33:54 PM »

Such an obvious word, and yet...

Weegee · « **Reply #12 on:** June 11, 2009, 05:06:30 PM »

Literally anything you Google with safeSearch turned off brings up porn... yes, even including the term, "anything".

Anyways, let us critique.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #13 on:** June 11, 2009, 05:33:44 PM »

CONCAVE NIPPLES.

Weegee · « **Reply #14 on:** June 11, 2009, 05:51:01 PM »

Do you think that the brown dots are some sort of vaguely cancerous skin condition or just splotches of something on the photo?

Glorb · « **Reply #15 on:** June 11, 2009, 07:08:13 PM »

They're SEXY SPOTS.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #16 on:** June 11, 2009, 07:43:29 PM »

The key word here was "girls". Now put that back on your MySpace where it belongs.

Glorb · « **Reply #17 on:** June 11, 2009, 07:55:04 PM »

You are a pathetic excuse for a heterosexual male if you don't get at least a little turned on. I mean, yeah, she's not even real, but dude.

Dude.

The Chef · « **Reply #18 on:** June 11, 2009, 08:28:16 PM »

I'd hit it. :P

Weegee · « **Reply #19 on:** June 11, 2009, 08:32:58 PM »

I'd hit that like a freight train hits hapless bovines.

Quote from: Glorb on June 11, 2009, 07:55:04 PM

I mean, yeah, she's not even real

Isn't that the point of this thread? I was under the impression that we were referring exclusively to Vidya Harems here. Let's classify: Is this topic intended to ~~objectify, lol~~, I mean, discuss just video game chicks like the one above, or babes in general such as my previous contribution?

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #20 on:** June 11, 2009, 08:44:53 PM »

Well, considering that this whole thing was sparked by a picture of Bill Kaulitz, I'd say anything goes.

Wait a minute... is that...

HOLY CRAP THEY'RE THE SAME PERSON.

SolidShroom · « **Reply #21 on:** June 12, 2009, 05:02:28 AM »

I remember my mother's reaction when she first saw a picture of Tira in one of my gaming magazines when I was 12. It wasn't pretty.

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #22 on:** June 12, 2009, 07:01:18 AM »

ShadowBrain, what's your opinion on Juno Eclipse?

Weegee · « **Reply #23 on:** June 12, 2009, 04:04:45 PM »

Quote from: SolidShroom on June 12, 2009, 05:02:28 AM

I remember my mother's reaction when she first saw a picture of Tira in one of my gaming magazines when I was 12. It wasn't pretty.

~~But wouldn't the pages have been stuck together by then?~~ DISREGARD THAT; NOTHING WAS SAID

Anyways, I suppose she gave the standard "objectification of women in today's chauvinistic society" rant? Or, was it perhaps the ever-appreciated "you shouldn't be looking at that sort of thing / I'd better keep a closer eye on your personal life" speech?

Glorb · « **Reply #24 on:** June 12, 2009, 07:05:44 PM »

Or worse; maybe she really liked it.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #25 on:** June 12, 2009, 10:55:32 PM »

Quote from: Glorb on June 11, 2009, 07:55:04 PM

You are a pathetic excuse for a heterosexual male if you don't get at least a little turned on.

Fear not, my friend, fear not.

Tira: Though I did expect pre-loading for this to be the official art for her (which is better), I'd be lying if I said that didn't make me sit up a little straighter in my seat. One thing I can say about that girl: I'm glad she's gone to the trouble of already removing half her clothes.

Juno Eclipse: The figure of a hand-puppet snake and the face to match. Also, thanks for spelling my name right, Turtlekid.

Quote from: Weegee on June 11, 2009, 08:32:58 PM

Isn't that the point of this thread? I was under the impression that we were referring exclusively to Vidya Harems here.

Hell, I'd prefer it (but yeah, if you want to trot out Megan Fox or what-have-you, I'll not complain).

Weegee · « **Reply #26 on:** June 12, 2009, 11:25:14 PM »

Quote from: ShadowBrain on June 12, 2009, 10:55:32 PM

The figure of a hand-puppet snake and the face to match.

Now that you mention it, the illusion is uncanny: Her lower torso and legs resemble a gigantic wrist... with a bracelet, to boot.

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #27 on:** June 13, 2009, 06:13:42 AM »

Okay, I'm going to bring a Naruto-gal into this; don't shoot me, please.*

*linked because of huge image size.

Weegee · « **Reply #28 on:** June 13, 2009, 10:21:42 AM »

Fixed.

Nice... err, ladythings, anyway. Shame about the face.

Rao · « **Reply #29 on:** June 13, 2009, 11:14:01 AM »

Major Motoko Kusanagi, one of the main protagonists in the Ghost In the Shell: Stand Alone Complex series.

TEM · « **Reply #30 on:** June 13, 2009, 11:18:21 AM »

LOL Shadowbrian check out this lady I drew she's really sexxxy would you HIT IT or would you QUIT IT?! LOL!

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #31 on:** June 13, 2009, 11:37:00 AM »

TEM wins this thread.

Kuromatsu · « **Reply #32 on:** June 13, 2009, 02:25:51 PM »

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #33 on:** June 13, 2009, 05:03:47 PM »

Quote from: PaperLuigi on June 13, 2009, 11:37:00 AM

Kuromatsu wins this thread.

Fixed.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #34 on:** June 13, 2009, 05:59:39 PM »

Would you hit it... or would it hit you?

Weegee · « **Reply #35 on:** June 13, 2009, 06:10:26 PM »

She looks more likely to "Sieg Heil!" you than anything else.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #36 on:** June 13, 2009, 07:54:12 PM »

Quote from: Turtlekid1 on June 13, 2009, 05:03:47 PM

Even after Kuromatsu's good drawing, TEM still wins this thread.

Fixed.

Glorb · « **Reply #37 on:** June 13, 2009, 07:59:04 PM »

HEY NO STEALTH EDITS MISTER

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #38 on:** June 14, 2009, 01:29:57 PM »

Should I give in to the fad and change the name of the topic to "You Get Aroused, You Lose"?

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #39 on:** June 14, 2009, 04:44:04 PM »

I had an idea like that once, only for dirty Scrabble. It got shot down like a grouse during hunting season.

Meanwhile... whoa, slow down, people! Once again, in order:

Kurenai Yuui: The simplistic style, unnervingly flaming eyes/brick wall background, and overall Naruto-ness numb a little of what, in scholarly circles, we like to call "teh hawtnes", but the cleavage somehow makes it all worth the view.

Major Motoko Kusanagi: For whatever reason, the phrase "epically fine" springs to mind. However, is she kneeeling in front of Santa's Workshop?

ladyXXXXX: Draw a hyper-realistic version of that and you may just raise my heartbeat.

Kuromatsu's Girl: Not bad for a drawing, but you'll have to switch the collective size of her chest and head before I'll really want to look at it.

Mrs. Arrow: Yes, Superman wears his underwear on the outside, but it works because he's a guy, not a waistless Amazonian Eva Braun impersonator.

Additionally, I saw Glorb's sig immortalizing TEM's post well before I entered this thread.

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #40 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:03:08 PM »

Tara Strong, the voice for countless popular cartoon characters, among them PowerPuff Girls' Bubbles, FairlyOdd Parents' Timmy Turner, and Xiaolin Showdown's Omi.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #41 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:21:34 PM »

I don't think I can, with good conscience, make flirtatious comments concerning the voice of Timmy Turner. Be that as it may, though it's hard to ascertain the exact appearance of her face, I'm going to once again fall back on a solid "eh". (but certainly not the same "eh" as before, now...)

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #42 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:38:44 PM »

Okay, I'll take one last stab today at eliciting something more than an "eh."

Behold, not one, but two Hayden Panettierres.*

*Again, linked because of inconvenient size.

Captain Jim · « **Reply #43 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:40:41 PM »

You just picked her because of Heroes and Kingdom Hearts.

Admit it.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #44 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:42:01 PM »

And what's wrong with that?

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #45 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:43:51 PM »

Quote from: Captain Jim on June 14, 2009, 05:40:41 PM

You just picked her because of Heroes and Kingdom Hearts.

Admit it.

Nope, just Heroes. I don't care for her performance in KH.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #46 on:** June 14, 2009, 05:58:51 PM »

Hayden Panettierres: Questionably eyeliner aside, helloooo...

Speaking of inconvenient size...

Weegee · « **Reply #47 on:** June 14, 2009, 06:02:11 PM »

Quote from: ShadowBrain on June 14, 2009, 05:58:51 PM

Speaking of inconvenient size...

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #48 on:** June 15, 2009, 07:07:53 AM »

Power Girl.
Suddenly, it hit me that you might hit it, ShadowBrain.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #49 on:** June 15, 2009, 07:10:39 AM »

Like a punching bag that killed my parents.

Glorb · « **Reply #50 on:** June 15, 2009, 07:13:42 AM »

DUDE HE MENT WULD YOU DO HER

JESUS CRIST

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #51 on:** June 15, 2009, 11:53:20 AM »

Wow, I'm glad practically no female members attend this site on a daily basis. They might get a little mad at this topic.

Weegee · « **Reply #52 on:** June 15, 2009, 12:24:58 PM »

Heed Rule 30, boys and ~~gir~~... more boys.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #53 on:** June 15, 2009, 01:41:20 PM »

If that picture was in "You Freak, You Lose" I would've lost.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #54 on:** June 15, 2009, 02:58:31 PM »

Quote from: Glorb on June 15, 2009, 07:13:42 AM

DUDE HE MENT WULD YOU DO HER

JESUS CRIST

Uh... yeah, I know...

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #55 on:** June 17, 2009, 01:24:21 AM »

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #56 on:** June 17, 2009, 01:33:02 AM »

This is getting out of hand.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #57 on:** June 17, 2009, 02:37:39 AM »

That's what ShadowBrain said.

(about something else)

Weegee · « **Reply #58 on:** June 17, 2009, 02:34:04 PM »

You appear to be somewhat out of sorts, Crosseyed. First the MS Paint-quality monstrosity of a "woman" shown above, and then a quasi-suggestive reference directed towards Shadowbrain? Hm.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #59 on:** June 17, 2009, 04:16:43 PM »

Weird things happen to me when I stay up too late. I should probably try and get to bed before 3 before now. Seems that's when the crazy takes over.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #60 on:** June 18, 2009, 09:00:56 AM »

As both are, at the present time, rendered nameless...

CE7 Pic #1: Well, that's technically two pictures, but then again, Siamese twins are technically two people. But I digress. Now, this girl appears to be someone I see increasingly these days: Real Cute, not as in "really attractive" (she's somewhat plain, in fact, in both cliched MySpacey shots: Camera Arm in Shot and Looking Off-Screen), but as in "realistically, I could imagine walking by this person and thinking 'hey, alright...'". There's an invisible gap between standards of attractiveness on the internet and in real life: Whereas looking at this picture online barely elicits a reaction, I might be tempted to follow her a bit with my gaze were she to pass me by at school. Likwise, while your average videogame vixen fan art usually lends little more than increasingly uncomfortable jeans, I'd probably have the sexual equivalent of a grand mal seizure if Mai Shiranui suddenly showed up while I'm standing in line for a Venti. Then again, she's not actually real, but I digress once more.

CE7 Pic #2: I like eboy as much as the next art-minded gamer, but I think he should stick to what he does best: Fashioning two-page spreads in computer magazines, not transexual giantesses in Mardi Gras garb. I'll give him props for the basketball boobs, though.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #61 on:** June 19, 2009, 01:28:28 PM »

HEY SHADOWBRAIN WHAT ABOUT THIS WOMAN DO YOU THINK SHE'S HOT LOL

Shyguy92 · « **Reply #62 on:** June 19, 2009, 01:46:53 PM »

PL YOU'RE NOT FUNNY

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #63 on:** June 19, 2009, 02:12:46 PM »

EDIT: But seriously ShadowBrain, every harem needs a fat chick.

Glorb · « **Reply #64 on:** June 19, 2009, 02:35:01 PM »

shyguy92sucksballs

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #65 on:** June 19, 2009, 02:53:21 PM »

Not PL? I mean, shyguy hasn't even posted here.

As for the fat chick, I respond with nothing more than a hearty "no".

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #66 on:** June 19, 2009, 02:54:43 PM »

Yes he did.

Quote from: Shyguy92 on June 19, 2009, 01:46:53 PM

PL YOU'RE NOT FUNNY

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #67 on:** June 19, 2009, 03:51:30 PM »

How do you rate Tsunade?
Yes, she's from Naruto, but with less emphasis on the strangely colored eyes, and more emphasis on... worthwhile elements.

Glorb · « **Reply #68 on:** June 19, 2009, 03:56:02 PM »

What is it with anime-style chicks and pointy nipples?

Weegee · « **Reply #69 on:** June 19, 2009, 03:58:35 PM »

Anyone who allegedly sucks balls probably doesn't have ultimate jurisdiction over such pressing matters as the funnyosity of fellow members. PL YOU'RE ACTUALLY PRETTY AWESOME. Anyways,

Sure, Candy here already belongs to Crosseyed, but you know you still want her.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #70 on:** June 19, 2009, 04:20:55 PM »

Turtlekid1, for a Christian, you sure are naughty. :/

Besides, Tsuande's an old woman underneath her jutsu. Also, Weegee, where do you get all these strange/hilarious pictures?

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #71 on:** June 19, 2009, 04:26:04 PM »

Quote from: PaperLuigi on June 19, 2009, 04:20:55 PM

Turtlekid1, for a Christian, you sure are naughty. :/

I was under the impression that this whole thread was supposed to be satirical.

:P

And ShadowBrain didn't need to know that she's using a jutsu... :/

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #72 on:** June 19, 2009, 04:30:27 PM »

No worries though. Weegee and I have posted some pretty edgy pics too and we're both Christians.

Shyguy92 · « **Reply #73 on:** June 19, 2009, 05:35:10 PM »

Quote from: Glorb on June 19, 2009, 02:35:01 PM

shyguy92sucksballs

dude don't be mean i'm crying right now

Quote from: Weegee on June 19, 2009, 03:58:35 PM

Anyone who allegedly sucks balls

Oh god, Jered made an account...

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #74 on:** June 19, 2009, 06:36:41 PM »

I typed "unexpectedly arousing" into Google Images (SafeSearch on), and found this picture. I SWEAR TO YOU.

So... hit or quit?

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #75 on:** June 19, 2009, 06:55:29 PM »

Well, it's not the first image, but it is on the first page. However...

...this image appears before it does. CrossEyed has some explaining to do.

Weegee · « **Reply #76 on:** June 19, 2009, 07:06:11 PM »

Quote from: PaperLuigi on June 19, 2009, 04:20:55 PM

Also, Weegee, where do you get all these strange/hilarious pictures?

Uncyclopedia x Google Images ÷ Encyclopaedia Dramatica = Infinite pictoral possibilities and/or death by eye rape.

Quote from: PaperLuigi on June 19, 2009, 04:20:55 PM

Turtlekid1, for a Christian, you sure are naughty. :/

Don't fret over it, Turtlekid. Heck, the only reason why I'm yet to post something capable of serious evaluation is because most of my propositions have already been submitted.

Quote from: PaperLuigi on June 19, 2009, 06:55:29 PM

CrossEyed has some explaining to do.

On Crosseyed's behalf: Political savvy is sexy too, you know. Don't diss our Reaganator.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #77 on:** June 19, 2009, 07:45:26 PM »

Quote from: PaperLuigi on June 19, 2009, 06:55:29 PM

...this image appears before it does. CrossEyed has some explaining to do.

It's arousing, but not in an unexpected way.

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #78 on:** June 19, 2009, 08:29:10 PM »

Tsunade: There's only two other types of people I know with dots on their head: My brother and a large number of Indian women. That aside, the angle of the, uh, shot is somewhat awkward, though the (football) boobs once again make up for the overall Narutardedness (speaking of which, as I am lacking in that quality, I was somewhat uncertain as to the precise definition of "jutsu". I looked it up, and... yeah, I guess that could explain it).

"Candy":

Quote from: ShadowBrain on June 19, 2009, 02:53:21 PM

As for the fat chick, I respond with nothing more than a hearty "no".

PL's Girl: Her face and demeanor regrettably bring to mind innumerable, irritating "hot" schoolgirls, and after five or six pages of well-endowed lasses, her (curiously tropical bikini-clad) chest is a like a blast of cold air. But hey, she's not that bad.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #79 on:** June 19, 2009, 08:39:02 PM »

So ShadowBrain, you like big boobs huh?

How about her? Good or bad?

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #80 on:** June 19, 2009, 09:00:55 PM »

ShadowBrain · « **Reply #81 on:** June 19, 2009, 09:07:14 PM »

PL's Girl: That right there's the poster child for why push-up bras need to be government mandated. But still, pretty boneriffic.

Michelle O.: I dare not comment, lest Barack tap into Eagle Eye and unleash a world of hurt on me.

Weegee · « **Reply #82 on:** June 19, 2009, 09:07:58 PM »

If you wouldn't, you're a racist.

Pt_Peach · « **Reply #83 on:** June 19, 2009, 09:54:05 PM »

Weegee · « **Reply #84 on:** June 19, 2009, 10:12:29 PM »

A GIRL HAS INFILTRATED THIS FORUM'S INNERMOST SANCTUM OF MASCULINITY

EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF

Anyways, I seem to suddenly be feeling that pang of guilt which I've managed to evade for so many months. This is the equivalent of having a Rabbi walk in while you're telling Jew jokes. No offense, of course.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #85 on:** June 19, 2009, 10:26:53 PM »

Yeah, I feel kind of awkward posting this picture now.

Black Mage · « **Reply #86 on:** June 19, 2009, 10:33:30 PM »

Yeah, I'm going to step in here and say you guys should know better than this.

I'm all for attractive girls but the Fungi Forums is not the place to be posting pictures like these. This thread has just become an attempt to push the acceptable limit.

I hate to be the buzz kill, I really do, but surely you guys can resume this thread on 4chan.