Fungi Forums
Miscellaneous => General Chat => Topic started by: ShadowBrain on November 27, 2007, 10:21:00 PM
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What do you think is probably the worst movie--or movies--you have ever had the misfortune of viewing?
I think for me, it'd have to be Today You Die with Steven Segal. Seriously, I only saw about a third of it, and it takes the cake. I don't even know where to begin (or end), so I won't. Just watch it and weep.
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Worst movie ever? Hmmmm....I gonna have to say Jaws 3. That movie is truly a joke and it brings a bad name to the fantastic Jaws 1.
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No, that honor goes to Jaws IV. It managed to make psychic sharks look dumb, and that requires a lot of effort.
As for the worst movie ever, I'd say that Ecks vs. Sever comes very close. I have no idea how Lucy Liu AND Antonio Banderas both agreed to be in what is essentially a 90-minute long collection of cliches and stupid dialogue. Even weirder, the movie was based on an obscure GBA first-person shooter of the same name that I had the pleasure of playing because it was only about five bucks at GameStop. Guess which is better.
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Perhaps Little Man? It was so horrible, but in an odd way entertaining. Like watching that are filled with babies wreck.
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Ecks vs. Sever was a fairly good game. I haven't seen the movie, though.
Street Fighter fits this thread.
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I'm not sure worst movie ever, but I thought both Ice Age movies were rather lame. The first was mediocre at best, but the second was just horrible. I mean, really. A mammoth that thinks it's a possum? That is supposed to be funny...how?
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Napoleon Dynamite.
I'll say what was originally a PM to N64 Chick (IIRC):
When I saw the previews for the movie, I immediately knew I wouldn't like it. When I saw the commercials for it on TV, I still knew I wouldn't like it.
My mother thought it would be a cute movie though. So she dragged my father, my sister, my brother, his girlfriend (at the time), and myself to the movies every so often to try and see it. The first few times my mother tried, it was sold out, which was a huge relief for us, so we either picked another movie or just left and did something else that night.
"Why don't you guys wanna see it?" My mother usually asked.
"Because it's about a LOSER." Was my brother's reply. And I agreed.
"It looks pretty stupid" was his girlfriend's reply.
Then finally came a night when the movie wasn't sold out. We dreaded walking into the theater, where it had already started with the opening credits. I sat next to my father, who also shared my sentiments. It was EXACTLY how I thought it was going to be. Terrible.
Every 20 minutes or so my father and I would comment about how bad it was. I did not laugh once. My father also was easily able to keep a straight face, as were my brother and his girlfriend. My brother and his girlfriend would also turn around in their seats and comment with us how stupid the movie was.
2 hours of my life, wasted.
When we left the theater, we all said to mom that if she wants to see a movie like that again, she can just go by herself.
I really hate terrible movies.
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I must've had my head wedged in the clouds again. I do that a lot. Seriously. How the heck did I forget that?!
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Scary Movie 4. But then again that movie was meant to be stupid to be funny. But I dident find it funny at all. Just plain DUMB!
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Napoleon Dynamite was okay I guess. It wasn't excellent, nor was it the worst movie ever.
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Where are my supporters in this argument? Napoleon Dynamite is an excellent film.
Also, I can't really recall seeing any movies I outright hated. 'Course, I avoid most movies.
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Napoleon Dynamite is an epic masterpiece of humor.
It also got massively overquoted and referenced, but that's just a sign of how good it was.
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I loved Napoleon Dynamite. It was simple yet very entertaining. It's an aquired taste.
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I don't really have a movie I really hate.
As for Napoleon Dynamite, I don't see how people don't enjoy it, it's a terrific film technically, and a hilarious movie plot and script wise.
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It's fine if other people like the film. I don't, though. I consider it to be terrible.
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Napoleon Dynamite is an epic masterpiece of humor.
It also got massively overquoted and referenced, but that's just a sign of how good it was.
That's more or less my arguement.
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I can't think of a movie less epic than Napoleon Dynamite.
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The humor is of epic quantities, not the movie (plot).
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Napoleon Dynamite is one of my favorite movies of all time in so many degrees.
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I don't really watch many movies, so the movie I'm about to list may not be the worst of all time, but it's bad:
Eight Crazy nights.
Seriously, the movie was terribly unfunny. Potty humor can be good, but not when it's extensively shoved down your throat. Then it's just gross. Not an inch of this film is worth a laugh, a chuckle, a chortle, a guffaw, a giggle, a cackle, a hee-haw, a snicker, a smirk, a titter, a whizgigging or even a "tee-hee". It's that bad.
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I didn't like Eight Crazy Nights either. After Big Daddy, most of Sandler's films stopped being funny. My mother got me Eight Crazy Nights as a gift for my Confirmation, but I found myself fast-forwarding through the terrible music in the movie.
Mr. Deeds was terrible, and I didn't like Anger Management much either. Click was okay, as was Chuck and Larry.
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Me? I can't stand Sandler.
As for bad movies, I don't have much judgement on that accord, considering I love watching terrible movies, for a good laugh. Like old 50s sci-fi and the like. But, as for just BAD, not even funny bad, I'd have to say that I hated Fantastic Four. I hated Fantastic Four a great deal.
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All I'll say about this is that the sequel was a proper Fantastic Four movie.
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What do you mean?
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I mean it was very good and captured the tone and spirit of the comics almost perfectly. To be clear, by "it", I mean Rise of the Silver Surfer.
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For truly horrible movies, it's hard to pick which ones are the worst because they're all hard to sit through.
Home Alone 3. I mean, what's the point without the original Kevin and original bandits?
Ping! The movie was "Home Alone" with a chihuahua outsmarting the bandits. The chihuahua's final trick is flying in a small hang glider. I'm not making any of this up. I rented it thinking it had to be so bad as to be good... but no, it was plain bad.
Resident Evil. Had nothing to do with the game. Nothing.
The Ladykillers. The trailer was a riot. The actual movie was terrible. Imagine, a movie starring Tom Hanks that wasn't good.
Brother Bear. My friend said it was the best movie of all time. I watched it... and man was it boring and repetitive. Not even Rick Moranis voicing one of the moose could save this film.
Star Wars Holiday Special. Okay, so I only saw a five-minute montage of it on YouTube, but even that was four minutes too long. I agree that George Lucas was wise to prevent that special from ever being distributed to the public ever again. I also agree that it needs to be MST3K-ified.
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Napoleon Dynamite.
I'll say what was originally a PM to N64 Chick (IIRC):
When I saw the previews for the movie, I immediately knew I wouldn't like it. When I saw the commercials for it on TV, I still knew I wouldn't like it.
My mother thought it would be a cute movie though. So she dragged my father, my sister, my brother, his girlfriend (at the time), and myself to the movies every so often to try and see it. The first few times my mother tried, it was sold out, which was a huge relief for us, so we either picked another movie or just left and did something else that night.
"Why don't you guys wanna see it?" My mother usually asked.
"Because it's about a LOSER." Was my brother's reply. And I agreed.
"It looks pretty stupid" was his girlfriend's reply.
Then finally came a night when the movie wasn't sold out. We dreaded walking into the theater, where it had already started with the opening credits. I sat next to my father, who also shared my sentiments. It was EXACTLY how I thought it was going to be. Terrible.
Every 20 minutes or so my father and I would comment about how bad it was. I did not laugh once. My father also was easily able to keep a straight face, as were my brother and his girlfriend. My brother and his girlfriend would also turn around in their seats and comment with us how stupid the movie was.
2 hours of my life, wasted.
When we left the theater, we all said to mom that if she wants to see a movie like that again, she can just go by herself.
I really hate terrible movies.
Man...there's so many things I want to say to you......but I won't, cause I'm tired and don't really care. I'll sum it up here:
Get a ( freekin ) sense of humor! ( Goodbye. )
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I loved Eight Crazy Nights. The humor may be extremely immature, and Adam Sandler writes some terrible songs, but that's what I love about it. Also, I can relate to Sandler's character because he's the biggest jerk to everyone around him and no one actually does anything about him. At least not until the end.
Anyway, why hasn't anyone mentioned Son of The Mask? that's probably the first movie I saw previews for and tried my hardest to avoid as much as possible.
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Napoleon Dynamite is definitely not my style of humor, at all. I saw it and my sentiment for the entire movie was "what, what?"
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While Napoleon Dynamite isn't the worst movie ever, it's the worst movie I've seen in the past several years, at least.
I watched it with my then-girlfriend and we were both wanting our hour and a half back... well, except for the dancing scene. She enjoyed that because she's a dancer.
I don't know why anybody would want to celebrate mediocrity, but I guess that's how our society is going.
That's not to say the setting itself was inherently bad. Freaks and Geeks was a great TV show. It was actually funny.
I think Roger Ebert got it right (http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20040618/REVIEWS/406180306/1023).
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Anyway, why hasn't anyone mentioned Son of The Mask? that's probably the first movie I saw previews for and tried my hardest to avoid as much as possible.
Absolutely, though I think that pretty much any and all sequels that come out after ten years should go without saying.
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Ew. Good point. I had to sit through that snoozefest. The only good part was right near the beginning when the dad was playing Mario Kart Super Circuit. His character? Luigi. =D
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*sigh* Ok, now that I'm rested:
They/I say that Napoleon Dynamite is a movie that you need to watch twice to "understand" it. The "jokes" in that movie aren't actual jokes, but their still funny. Just the fact that they made a movie about these stupid things is what makes it funny. Unless all you laugh at is actual jokes, then you won't like this movie. If you have a really strong sense of humor, or a really weak one, then this movie is a masterpiece. But I guess that kind of humor isn't for you. I hate to call anyone ignorant, but it really makes me angry to see someone bash such a great movie, just cause they don't get the jokes.
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I don't think you need to watch it twice to get it. Either you do or you don't. I find the characters' mannerisms probably more inherently funny than the other parts of the movie, but I also enjoy a lot of the dialogue.
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I agree, the humor comes from the weird characters and strangeness of the movie. If you want to lol at obvious jokes and gags go watch a RED TEXT ON A WHITE BACKGROUND movie.
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*sigh* Ok, now that I'm rested:
They/I say that Napoleon Dynamite is a movie that you need to watch twice to "understand" it. The "jokes" in that movie aren't actual jokes, but their still funny. Just the fact that they made a movie about these stupid things is what makes it funny. Unless all you laugh at is actual jokes, then you won't like this movie. If you have a really strong sense of humor, or a really weak one, then this movie is a masterpiece. But I guess that kind of humor isn't for you. I hate to call anyone ignorant, but it really makes me angry to see someone bash such a great movie, just cause they don't get the jokes.
I get the jokes. I just don't find them funny jokes, and I believe I've got a great sense of humor.
Did I mention I also was forced to watch it with my cousins one Christmas? Still didn't like it afterward.
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Well, whatever. Maybe it's just because you were forced to watch it, or maybe you just have something against nerds. It's a shame you don't like it though, cause it's really a great movie.
(I do agree the storyline wasn't the best though)
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Well, whatever. Maybe it's just because you were forced to watch it,
Maybe, I never wanted to see it in the first place, yet I was subjected to it twice out of something that wasn't my free will. or maybe you just have something against nerds.
Why would I have something against nerds if I'm one myself? It's a shame you don't like it though,
I don't think so.cause it's really a great movie.
See above.
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What's your point? Oh wait, I think you made it two pages ago.
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I did, but someone had to question my opinion again.
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1. Why would I have something against nerds if I'm one myself?
2. I don't think so.
1. "Because it's about a LOSER." Was my brother's reply. And I agreed.
Fine then. Maybe you have something against losers.
2. That's ignorance. No offence.
Well, I guess we have different senses of humor (obviously).
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Shyguy92, Vid is entitled to his opinion about a movie. Calling him ignorant isn't a good way to make a point. At all.
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Oh I give up. I'm just saying that he'd enjoy it if.....he enjoyed it. You know what I mean.
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...yeah, but he didn't. Not everyone likes Napoleon Dynamite.
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I give up.
P.S. I'm just pointing out his ignorance. As I said, I wasn't trying to offend him.
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Dude, calling him ignorant because he doesn't like a movie about a loser is not ignorant. It's his opinion.
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P.S. I'm just pointing out his ignorance. As I said, I wasn't trying to offend him.
Do you even know what the definition of ignorant is? Here, I'll use it correctly in a sentence:
"Your calling me 'ignorant' because of my opinions is ignorant."
Still don't understand?
ignorant:
Adjective
1. Lacking knowledge. 2. Showing or arising from a lack of knowledge: an ignorant mistake.
I might appear arrogant with my opinions, but not ignorant.
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Fine, fine, you win. I used the wrong word.
I wasn't calling you ignorant/arrogant, I was saying that your statement was.
Once again, I give up. I've made my point.
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I won? Won what?
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A virtual pie. Here you go.
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bigboy.com%2FRestaurantImages%2FPie-Straw.jpg&hash=83d628045f14c5248f155093476e4546)
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Let's get back to terrible movies, shall we?
Lessee, another bad movie....Napo- No, I said that one already...
Chicken Little, Disney's attempt at a 3D animated movie, wasn't that good at all. They should really leave that stuff to Pixar.
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You know, they're pretty much only making CG movies these days too, right? In fact I can't really think of any traditionally animated stuff (American cartoons are all Flash now) currently being produced besides anime.
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Curious George is the only one I can think of that has been done in the traditional style in recent times.
The animation we see on Cartoon Network is extremely stiff and kinda crappy nowadays. The animation on Nickelodeon is luscious and nearly lifelike, if only for the reason all their cartoons have been replaced by live action shows. The stuff on Nick Jr. is more entertaining than Teen Nick.
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And even then, children's programming is also all animated in Flash and seems to have conformed to the exact same conventions. None of them are original anymore.
While I have the chance I'll mention that it is one of my big dreams to make another traditionally animated feature length motion picture when I'm older, provided things are still the way they are now.
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As mentioned before Japan still makes regular animations, and I just watched a newish (2003) French animated movie done with regular animation. Maybe it's just America that's gone CGI-happy.
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A lot of (most?) anime uses CGI, or very well-meshed CGI and traditional drawing. They just do it so well that it still looks drawn.
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Back when I watched InuYasha I learned that in the middle of the series they switched animation styles from drawn to digital cel. Flashbacks from older episodes were frequently used so it was easy to see the difference in style.
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Digital cel is common, but at least they don't take one frame and just slide it around the way American cartoons do.
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Yeah, I think a lot of those shows nowadays are, like, CG'ed 2-D.
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As mentioned before Japan still makes regular animations, and I just watched a newish (2003) French animated movie done with regular animation. Maybe it's just America that's gone CGI-happy.
Well, we are in the Animation Age Ghetto (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AnimationAgeGhetto).
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I see it as a graph, which I can hopefully make with ASCII.
. E ^ y
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|
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< | > x
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| . B
. D |
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\/ . A
. C
The x-axis represents entertainment value (right is more, left is less), and the y-axis represents how well the movie achieves its intended effect (up is more, down is less).
Point A is Plan 9 from Outer Space. Intended to be a serious drama/social commentary, the horrible acting and production values make it impossible to evoke any seriousness. In so doing, it becomes one of the greatest comedies ever.
Point B, Future War, may actually have worse production values and acting than Plan 9, bolstered by the lack of any coherence in the plot (In the words of Mike Nelson, it's more like movie loaf: parts of real movie, chunked and formed), and becomes the funniest failure at a real movie I've seen so far. However, it didn't fail in its purpose as much as Plan 9 did: the producer remarked on set that he hoped the movie would show up on MST3K, and so, while their hopes of creating a watchable, profitable action flick were not to be, at least one intended effect was.
Point C is 'Manos' The Hands of Fate. Hal Warren meant to show that a fertilizer salesman with $19,000 could make a profitable horror film. He was successful up until the word "could." It made no money, had no horror, and led Hal Warren to kill himself. This time, the ludicrously poor production values (such as all the lines being dubbed in by the same two people) can't save the movie from itself, and even with the MST3K crew riffing it, it becomes difficult to stay awake.
However, 'Manos' only brought us to 0 entertainment. Point D, Home Alone 4, takes us deep into the negatives, as do most crappy attempts at comedy. This one, however, loses even more points for completely disgracing a good comedy. Rather than just failing at making you like it, it seems to be intentionally trying to make you hate it. If that was the intended effect, then they did a great job, but assuming that their purpose was to make a movie deserving of the Home Alone name, they failed horribly. This makes Home Alone 3 look like Shawshank (as opposed to feeling like being in the actual Shawshank prison, which would be a relief compared to HA4).
Finally, Point E is Hobgoblins. This film's intended purpose seems to be to make the sleaziest, basest, stupidest rip-off of Gremlins ever, with plenty of celebrations of sluttiness and shallowness thrown in to boot. That was a rousing success (no pun intended), and because of this, it is one of the most unwatchable films ever.
This should actually be a 3D graph, where the Z-axis represents the amount of meta-entertainment. (i.e., the Land Before Time films aren't entertaining in and of themselves, but the fact that there's over a dozen of them is.)
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._.
Best post ever.
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I saw the MST3K version of Manos. That was indeed a terrible movie-- and according to one of my friends from high school, a most educated movie fanatic, it is the worst movie ever created.
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I know it's a contender, but there have been others so named. And Torgo still makes that movie worth watching.
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Home Alone 4? How long has that been around? I haven't even seen much of HA3.
This reminds me of a movie I only saw once and hated: Problem Child 3. It's like it completely forgot about the second one since there's no mention of Trixie (I think that was the girl's name) or her mom which is weird since PC2 ended with her and Junior's dad getting married.
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For some reason that made me think of the incredible continuity split from Not Quite Human 2 to Still Not Quite Human, although the latter was definitely the best of the three.
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._.
Best post ever.
True Dat.
Sorry, I just had to...
Here is another really good post...
From Lizard Dude on the TEM's Drawing Contest! thread...
http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=11084.0;all (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=11084.0;all)
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I would say Mr. 3000. Bernie Mac doesn't know how to make good shows.
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But Mr. 3000 is a movie, so his ability to make shows is irrelevant. ;)
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Perhaps he thought shows and movies were the same thing? :/
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Huge mistake there, thought, as they... well, aren't. *shrugs*
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"Show" can mean TV show, movie, stage show, etc. Less commonly used to refer to movies these days, but still technically accurate.
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Ocean's Twelve was pretty terrible, in my opinion.
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Yeah, I don't recall if I ever watched that one (I think Eleven was okay), but Thirteen put me to sleep. I know it's pretty much just an excuse for the ladies to ogle two of People 's "Sexiest Man Alive" winners, but would it kill them to actually have a different plot for each move besides "a dozen or so middle-aged men rob a casino"?
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I actually thought Thirteen was more entertaining than Twelve but Eleven will always be the best. Another unbearable movie was Flight of Fury with Steven Seagal. I hated it.
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You guys do know about the original Ocean's Eleven, right?
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I know there's an original Oceans Eleven but I've never seen it.
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everybody that I talk to thinks that Norbit was a good movie, when I saw it, I thought it was a waste of my time. It had like 2 funny parts, it sucked
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Just about every movie my parents rented that I didn't want to watch but they convinced me to come in and watch it with them anyway qualifies as terrible to me. Some of the more notable candidates are Blades of Glory, Talladega(probably misspelled, but I don't care) Nights and Nacho Libre(in which I finally had the sense to get up and leave near the end). Whoever said Napolean Dynamite was bad, I fully agree with them.
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Me and my friends love bad movies. We absolutely thrive on them. Unintentional comedy is probably our favorite art form, and MST-styled attacks on cinema probably our favorite hobby. For this purpose, there is no modern director "better" than Uwe Boll, whose films are wonderful to rip into, provided they don't, you know, blind you.
There are some movies, however, that no amount of poking and prodding can make worthwhile. They resist all criticism, and, in fact, actually mock you, because they know that they suck, and know that you are here, powerless, unable to extract a single chuckle from their rancidness.
For me and my friends, the most awful movies we've seen so far are Date and Epic Movies. I missed the first half of Epic Movie, and I'm glad for that. The only joy we got out of either of them was guessing what horrible, cliche, overused excuses for jokes they were going to use, but even that didn't stop them from being incredibly painful. Oh, and the fact that we didn't actually waste the $10 to see them in theaters.
And now, they're making Meet the Spartans, which is going to reference "Leave Brittany Alone."
Because "Leave Brittany Alone" isn't old and tired and dead, now, is it?
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The Sandlot 2 is absolutely awful. It's an insult to the original. It was just terrible. A total disgrace.
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The Hulk wasn't really a bad movie overall, but the total time "smashing" compared to the total time "talking" was a huge disappointment. So I guess it could also qualify as one of the worst movies ever because it was the total opposite of what you'd expect. Sometimes that's a good thing. But not this time. I bet Hulk would smash the producer if he ever found out he was cheated nearly 120 minutes out of a 140 minute movie.
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^ That movie was too emo for a superhero flick.
Whether I said this before or not, I'll say it again: I really didn't care for Batman Begins.
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Too emo? :/
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Too much yack, not enough smash. Also, the whole "living comic book" feel isn't done right, and the one actual Hulk fiction reference is to the TV series.
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Yeah, I mentioned all of that in the above post. How does that make it emo?
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Batman Begins is the best comic book movie ever made.
Never saw Hulk, but I guess they decided it was bad enough to make another one that disregards the first movie.
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Is it too late to nominate Pirates of the Caribbean 3? Yeah, not quite Worst Movie Ever material, but definitely up there for Most Disappointing Failed-To-Meet-Expectations Movie. All special effects, no coherent story. I gave up once Jack Sparrow was having his surreal moment with the rock crabs.
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I too was enraged at the incoherence of the Pirates 3 story. Why couldn't they stick with the tried-and-true realistic stuff like a ship of undead skeleton pirates and a heartless octopus man who controlled a sea monster.
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Is it too late to nominate Pirates of the Caribbean 3? Yeah, not quite Worst Movie Ever material, but definitely up there for Most Disappointing Failed-To-Meet-Expectations Movie. All special effects, no coherent story. I gave up once Jack Sparrow was having his surreal moment with the rock crabs.
Totally. I think there were problems when I wasn't sure whether or not to laugh at that scene where the British armada starts bringing down all this governmental legislation on Davy Jones.
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I haven't seen Pirates 3, but I don't really plan to in the near future. I loved the first one, but I didn't like the 2nd one at all.
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The third one's the best, IMO. Although the ending sucked. It has a Kieth Richards cameo, too.