Fungi Forums
Miscellaneous => General Chat => Topic started by: Markio on September 04, 2006, 10:08:28 PM
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Okay, so let me take you back to Friday, September 1st. My drama teacher had told us on one of the first days of class that she would tell us what our school's fall drama production would be on September 1st. September 1st came, and we all asked her. She said she lied and that she'd tell us on Tuesday. It has been rumored that it is going to be the Diary of Anne Frank. Upon further investigation by myself, I looked up the characters and such information, and apparently Anne Frank kisses a boy in the play, a guy named Peter, who is a teenager my age. Suddenly, I had the urge to try and get that part. Why, you ask? Well... I've never kissed a girl.
Yeah yeah, I know, kissing isn't that important, and a kiss only matters if you love the person and they love you back the same way. But unlike you, I'm from a little country called America, where everything is done fast and without feeling. So naturally you can all tell by my choice of words so far in this thread that no girl would want to listen to me for so long, let alone kiss me. I probably sound selfish and superficial right now, but my real point is that if I were to get this part, which intigues me without kissing, I would still end up kissing Anne Frank, and I've never done that before. This is the part where I start panicking over how I'm going to kiss someone IF I get this particular part, IF I make callbacks, and IF this is even the play that the drama teacher really chose.
That's when this idea came to me. Have you ever kissed another person? I don't mean like your mother or got kissed on the cheek, I mean like on the lips with another person, in complete agreement. If you have, give us the details, sistah! I mean, was it romantic? How old were you? What was your relationship with this person before the kiss? Were you outside, in front of people, in a closet at some preteen slumber party, where?
On top of that question, what advice would you give to someone kissing for the first time? Ask the person before you do anything? Stare at them romantically, move in an inch and see if they come in too? Pucker? Wait until your faces touch to reach with your lips? Close your eyes? Try to focus and go cross-eyed, or just let everything blur as you make contact?
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Just do it, man.
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"Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them."
~Steve Martin
"Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves."
~Albert Einstein
"I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up."
~Barbara Bush
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That Steve Martin quote is killing me!
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I've had a couple dreams, in which I kiss my best friend from school, who happens to be a boy. I've had thoughts of kissing him, but I could never find myself to do it.
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Uhhhhh, I've never kissed a girl before, maybe it's because pirates don't do that kind of stuff, I don't know.
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I have no advice, seeing how I've never even come close to getting that far in a relationship. Also, I am extremely awkward in situations where I have no background in... like intrapersonal relationships.
Needless to say, there's a bit of a Catch-22 going there.
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wat
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I honesly can't think of anything to say other than:
I feel your pain, man.
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Are you sure this is going to be a full-contact kiss at all, or just some kind of fake stage kiss. Don't they sometimes do a weird kiss to the side of the lip thing or turn to obscure the lips from the audience and just get really close?
I have kissed a few people and I don't really feel like telling any stories at this time but a good tip to score a first kiss is to get into a situation where your faces end up naturally close. Examples: sitting side-by-side on a bus seat, laying on a bed talking, camping in a tent maybe.
Note: None of the kisses were truly initiated by me. I'm a chicken at heart (less so in my advanced age) and the girls did the work. Thank goodness.
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Don't forget that I'd only end up kissing someone if I get the part in the play that isn't even confirmed until I go to school today. As for fake stage kissing, our school does REAL kisses! It's funny when we perform for elementary schools and at the really touching moments you hear the whole audience going "eeeewwwwww!".
Well, if Lizard Dude can kiss a girl, then I bet I could! Wearing glasses is like the same amount of uncoolness as lacking a personality!
Unless you were wearing contacts during this ... contact.
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Dang. Lizard Dude has all the luck. :P
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Never kissed anyone (sorry Markio). But yeah, Lizard Dude has all the luck.
BTW, did you make the part, Markio?
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*faints* No, I have not made the part yet, as it was just announced today at school that it will definitely be The Diary of Anne Frank. Tryouts(auditions, whatever) will be in like two weeks.
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Sorry, I misread your last post. I thought it said that you will be finding out today. Oh well, guess that means that this topic isn't dead yet.
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Lizard Dude is just the best guy for that kind of stuff. Don't know why.
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...
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I really don't know what to say here. Kissing is a skill most people acquire when they're about a year old. Yes, it's different when you're not kissing someone in your family, but just don't dwell on the fact you have to kiss someone and you'll be fine.
Honestly, it just comes naturally. Sure, you want to get that first one out of the way (I did in elementary school...hehe) if you haven't already. But it's not hard at all! You just have to, well, not try, if you get my drift.
Also, there is nothing wrong with wearing glasses. My senior year of high school both the homecoming king and queen wore them (although the queen wore contacts most of the time). Just as long as they're not Coke-bottle glasses you'll be fine.
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It's hilarious if you read that as pt_peach ingeniously insinuating that Markio is gay.
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I just embarassed myself again. I didn't mean to say that, Markio.
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It's hilarious if you read that as pt_peach ingeniously insinuating that Markio is gay.
Or it could have meant she was gay. Your own "have kissed a few people" made me read your post twice.
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(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmyspace-054.vo.llnwd.net%2F01066%2F45%2F06%2F1066876054_l.jpg&hash=0241a8f0c8254fd30ed46ecb49f6edc0)
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p
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It looks like a board game. "Kiss the Puppy".
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(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmyspace-054.vo.llnwd.net%2F01066%2F45%2F06%2F1066876054_l.jpg&hash=0241a8f0c8254fd30ed46ecb49f6edc0)
This is the single greatest picture ever posted on this site. Ever.
And I can't even explain why.
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Yeah, I would wait for the moment totally, like the moment you always see on films, they go in slowly, until each one is sure of the other. And then they suck face, yeah, wait for that moment, I know I am...
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I made the picture. That's my dog Boba Fett. After I had made it I said the almost exact same thing as IS.
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I kissed a girl a few hours ago. No joke. It probably wouldn't have happened, except there is something akwardly romantic about home football games. The funny thing is that I was wearing my goofy band uniform when it happened. I don't want to go into detail about it, but it was nice.
*smile*
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Nice! The spirit of Markio has created romantic success for at least one FF member so far!
except there is something akwardly romantic about home football games.
I definitely agree.
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My spirit? No way, that was all Hyrulian. I hope it was special for you.
I don't know if I want my first kiss to be for a play. I doesn't seem so special or intimate at all. I probably won't get the part, so I don't have to worry about it, I don't think. Maybe fake kisses, on the mouth or not, don't count. Your real first kiss is when it is involuntarily agreed upon by both kissers, perhaps.
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Well, if Lizard Dude can kiss a girl, then I bet I could! Wearing glasses is like the same amount of uncoolness as lacking a personality!
Hahahaha! For some reason I found that pretty funny. As for myself... wellp, I'm 36 years old and never kissed no one but my good ol' dog, Bubba. It don't matter none. No big deal.
Actually, I'm not 35 and don't have a dog named Bubba. XD But I really haven't kissed a girl before (unless you count the number of times that Princess Toadstool has kissed me after I rescued her). But I do have a picture of a girl kissing me while we sat on a couch. :) We were both really young but it was still cute.
I wish I had some good advice to give, but my own convictions have dried up any experience I could tell you about. My goal is to try and wait to kiss a girl as long as I can, possibly until marriage. I'm sure this sounds rediculous and old-fashioned (and it even sounds that way to me!) but I want to make it special for my wife. (Plus, I don't have any nerve to even think of doing that during a date! XD) I think that if someone of the opposite sex kissed me and then later we broke up and they got a new date, I would feel even worse about that. I don't know how all girls would take that though. I feel a poll coming soon. >_>
But as for you... I think I would let the girl make the first move just to be safe. Then you can have more of an excuse to kiss her! However, if both of you wait for each other or don't want to then... uh... it's up to you I guess. It's not the end of the world if you choose the wrong time but it could be a little embarrassing.
So, in summary, I hope that my something came out of my random rambling. Maybe the internet has some good advice. Good luck whatever happens!
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmyspace-054.vo.llnwd.net%2F01066%2F45%2F06%2F1066876054_l.jpg&hash=0241a8f0c8254fd30ed46ecb49f6edc0)
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Dude, good luck getting a wife without kissing her until the wedding day.
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmyspace-054.vo.llnwd.net%2F01066%2F45%2F06%2F1066876054_l.jpg&hash=0241a8f0c8254fd30ed46ecb49f6edc0)
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I think he has mistaken "kissing" for another activity. Perhaps you need to take another Health class?
Yes, I am breaking the "post an enormous picture of TEM's dog at the end" chain. Not to insult you TEM, just for legibility.
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Yeah, isn't kissing like what happens when a bee takes pollen from a flower? XP
It's not really a strong conviction, just a thought. I mostly want to stay away from the type of kissing that could lead to other things (otherwise it might not be a big deal). But let's not get into that subject. ;^_^
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Your real first kiss is when it is involuntarily agreed upon by both kissers, perhaps.
While that is true, you never know when the timing will be right. My fiancee and I (before she was my fiancee) talked about our first kiss before we had our first kiss, so possibly talking about it would be a route to go. It was a darn good kiss too, but that's a story for another time. :)
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Darn this thread! It's making me want to kiss someone again. I'm supposed to concentrate on gaming, not women!
Oh well, this will make me feel better.
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmyspace-054.vo.llnwd.net%2F01066%2F45%2F06%2F1066876054_l.jpg&hash=0241a8f0c8254fd30ed46ecb49f6edc0)
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News!
I auditioned for the play, and tofay on the callback list, I made callbacks, which were thirty minutes later. And I read for the same character each time, and that character was... Peter, the boy that kisses Anne. I felt good reading his lines, and it looked like the drama teacher liked my chemistry with Anne each time. She was positively beaming at the end of every scene!
I should explain that at auditions, everyone performs their own monologue that they choose and bring with them, and then if the teacher sees promise, you go to callbacks, where they'll choose a certain scene at a time, and have two or three rounds of different people reading for the different characters. So I made callbacks and read for the same part each time, which happened to my friend last year and he ended up being chosen for that role. There's another round of callbacks tomorrow, I hope I'm still on the list! To do drama 4 next year I need to have a lead role at least once.
Anyway, this thread is still supposed to be centered on kissing. At callbacks, I read two or three times as Peter in the scene directly before the kiss. Afterwards I read the kissing description. See, Peter and Anne go up to the attic together, their "special" place. Peter is obviously dropping awkward hints that he likes her, and at the end of the scene he asks her to come up there tomorrow night. She agrees, and she turns around and begins to leave. Peter suddenly goes up to her and kisses her quickly on the back of her head. Anne stops, turns around and throws her arms around him, and they kiss for a few whole seconds! Then she hurries downstairs into the bathroom and Peter blows out the candle in the attic and it goes into the next scene. Intense!
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Intense! That's hardly a good enough description! You, sir, have worked very hard at this, and will recieve your just reward. Multiple times.
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Which is...
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmyspace-054.vo.llnwd.net%2F01066%2F45%2F06%2F1066876054_l.jpg&hash=0241a8f0c8254fd30ed46ecb49f6edc0)
A PUPPY KISS!! Okay, I'll stop. Good luck, Markio! Dominate the show! Save her with your charm.
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Bad news! I was horrible on the second day of callbacks, and I ended up with the role of a soldier that appears at the end and says like one German word and that's it. The sad part is that my friend, who is class Senator and does multiple activities and always has a 3.8 or higher, received the part of Peter. What sucks about that is that I told him myself about how I hoped of getting that part, and also he would always tell me that Junior year meant getting lead parts. He doesn't even take Drama class anymore and he's still better, in the teacher's eyes. Oh, and at callbacks when they had me read as this one part, this kid who was younger than me told me to make my character less wild, which made me feel bad for some reason. Probably because he said "I'm sorry, I shouldn't tell you this, you're in drama 3 and I'm in drama 2", which means "I won't tell you what to do, you should know better".
Anyway, enough of the ANGST! The point is, I didn't get the part and won't get a kiss, stage directed or in real life. All I'm left with is the feeling that I'm not good at anything.
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You are good at something, otherwise you wouldn't have even gotten the one part. Just remember, there are no small parts in a play. Every role is important, even if it is the role with the one line at the end of the play. I've been there, so I know what you're feeling (or at least, I've had s similar feeling, but I took it in stride, since I remembered the above saying: There are no small roles).
I hope that came off as good advice. :)
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You know Markio, you sound just like me. I tend to doubt myself in ituations like that. The thing is, never give up. Remember what Toad up there just said, "You are good at something".
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Aw, rats! The disappointment of it all!
I must say, however, that this is no movie (it's reality, for those who didn't know) and your chances were not fantastic in the first place. Landing lead roles is tough, especially amidst the mysterious expectations of a director.
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I know I sounded really upset back there, but it's fun to be upset for a little while. I'm over it now, but I still don't know how I'm supposed to congratulate my friends without them saying "And you're a soldier! ...Yeah!" I'll just have to deal with that too. There's still the musical, and I'll probably just be in the ensemble for that too, but at least there's a lot of ensemble members there, so it's not so exclusive to have only like one scene. And yeah, at least I'm in the play, a lot of good actors didn't even make callbacks, let alone get a part in the play.
I also heard this great song from the musical Avenue Q, which is sort of like Sesame Street, but the puppets sing songs like "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" and "The Internet Is for Porn" and "If You Were Gay (I'd Be Okay)". Anyway, it's the closing song, and it's called For Now. The opening lines of the song are as follows:
Why does everything in life have to be so hard?
Maybe you'll never find your purpose.
Lots of people don't.
But then I don't know why I'm alive!
Well... who does, really?
The song starts out saying that everyone's a little unsatisfied, and that nothing lasts and life goes on, and you'll be faced with a lot of problems. But only for now. Because everything in life is right now. I didn't get the part that involves a kiss. That's in the past! Right now it's Sunday and I'm talking with some nice people (YOU) and I have the power to do my homeowrk before school tomorrow. So I can't change my part in the play. Well, as said in the song, "We'll just accept the things we cannot avoid for now!" It's a great song, and I should listen to it. We ALL should listen to it!
Maybe I'll kiss a girl in college or something. I'll have to wait... but only for now!
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Hmm. Sorry about that, Markio. But yeah, I was just going to say... maybe you'll get a better kissing opportunity later! ;) Sometimes in life we don't get the things we want right away but then later we get something ever better. Sometimes. Real love is more important than physical love anyway (but that's too easy to say for me). Good luck, Markio! Dominate the show.
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Let me just say, if you ever get a girlfriend, if she has a loooooong hook nose, ask me how to kiss her. I know how to kiss people with loooooong hook noses. *coughgonzocough*
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I've been lurking this thread, but never got around to posting.
Sorry to hear that Markio, but at least now your first kiss will end up being special.
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At least... we hope so. ;)
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The thing is not only about kissing another person, but about the feelings you have for that person and the same feeling the other person have for you. Then only the kiss have the true meaning.
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Holy [dukar], I remember this thread.
Incidentally, this is the thread that made us briefly famous when KnowYourMeme researched the Advice Dog template.
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The weird thing about this thread in hindsight is, wasn't Markio gay?
Or maybe this experience traumatized him into gayness. ;)
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Incidentally, this is the thread that made us briefly famous when KnowYourMeme researched the Advice Dog template.
Oh, yeah, this was the thread... you know, given the fact that that is apparently the most god[darn] influential meme ever, I think TEM should seek some sort of restitution. At the very least, I'll probably name a character in my book series after him.
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The thing is not only about kissing another person, but about the feelings you have for that person and the same feeling the other person have for you. Then only the kiss have the true meaning.
The vampire is right. When you truly love each other, the mechanics take care of themselves.
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The vampire is right. When you truly love each other, the mechanics take care of themselves.
This coming from experience?
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It could easily be. Don't quote me on this, but word has it that CrossEyed has a girlfriend.
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Don't be ridiculous. Who told you that?
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I thought it was his favorite video-game character this whole time.
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I think you're confusing him for ShadowBrain.
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(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi14.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fa335%2FTrevornater%2FHatersGonnaHate.jpg%3Ft%3D1291855914&hash=676734347fed84a6d45fe9a942a21d92)
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I have relevance! The Kiss the Puppy template lives on!
Click! (http://www.halolz.com/2011/01/12/shake-a-tree/)
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Really? I never would've guessed. (http://memegenerator.net/)
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Huh. I knew that there were a couple, but was unaware that there were already so many knock-offs.
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Advice Dog has proven to be one of the most prolific memes on the Internet, if one counts all its spin-offs (Courage Wolf, Poke Parents, etc.).
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PokeParents are an insult to the past 12,000 years of human progress, and should be dealt with as such.
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Oh, come now. Like most memes, they can be just as funny as they are unfunny, depending on the circumstances.
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I hate sounding like a broken record, but I still can't believe how popular that thing has become... and it came from here. Who do you think turned it into a full-fledged meme?
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I'm the reverse. I can believe its popularity, I just can't believe it started here. It seriously blows my freaking mind every time I think about it.
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Yeah I'm with bobman. I can't believe it started here of all places. This tiny forum. And it's like...one the biggest memes out there.
Oh, come now. Like most memes, they can be just as funny as they are unfunny, depending on the circumstances.
I judge a meme based on how forced it is. Creepy Woody is probably my favorite meme and it isn't forced at all. Bed Intruder on the other hand was funny for about five seconds until it...well, you know the rest.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYDYRwX2dLw
Socially Awkward Penguin and Advice Oak are my favorites.
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This topic has gone meta!
What bobman said. What blows my mind, too, and makes this video awesome on a more personal level is an image I made is in it (1:53). :D
Heh, I think I made the first Advice Dog spin-off (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=9323.msg452872#msg452872), too, although it wasn't popular.
Philosoraptor! XD XD XD
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I made my brother some Advice Dog spin-offs about him for his birthday.
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You know how sometimes people ask you like, "Who's the most famous person you've ever touched?"
My truthful answer to that is now the Advice Dog.
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I am supremely jealous.
...At least I've been to the TMK Mecca.
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Statistics say: Advice Dog itself is waning in popularity, but the "[adjective] [animal]" template is surging upward (http://www.google.com/trends?q=advice+dog,+meme+generator&ctab=0&geo=all&date=all&sort=0).
EDIT: By the way, any net-savvy dog owner needs to buy this:
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4gifs.com%2Fgallery%2Fd%2F54395-1%2Fscratchguard.jpg&hash=6664c5455ea1e5ea287430b9c81a599a)
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I'm getting a red X when I try to look at the picture here, and an error code when I try to open it in a separate window. Don't tell me the original AD is... lost!
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:(
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It's been gone for, like, two years now.
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Seems like it's been longer than that.
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(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages0.memegenerator.net%2FImageMacro%2F3752603%2FBOBA-FETT-WHERE.jpg%3FimageSize%3DMedium%26amp%3BgeneratorName%3DAdvice-Dog&hash=4be8a141c91175a008aefed156171269)
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I lost.
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My own contribution to this inanity: Failed Pun Stoat, a spin-off of Lame Pun Raccoon. I apologize in advance.
(https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/_z3qOPdy0bWw/TWCVz4uOSVI/AAAAAAAAFqE/Fl6mf9UmrJo/s800/Buddhist-walks-up-to-a-hot-dog-stand-Give-me-a-hot-dog-with-the-works.jpg)
(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/_z3qOPdy0bWw/TWCVz2X31cI/AAAAAAAAFqI/WMKvPTeXfO8/s800/Ill-have-pork-chops-And-make-them-low-fat-please-And-the-waiter-says-Yes-maam-which-way.jpg)
(https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/_z3qOPdy0bWw/TWCV0DywOmI/AAAAAAAAFqM/AZgLkcR1db0/s800/i-lost-the-entire-left-half-of-my-body-im-okay-now.jpg)
(https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/_z3qOPdy0bWw/TWCV0dpOYSI/AAAAAAAAFqQ/y1gQyw2npeY/s800/toad-always-goes-to-parties-on-the-weekends-hes-a-fungus.jpg)
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i'm merely reserving my place in internet history.
does TEM know of his fame?
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His real name is mentioned in The KnowYourMeme video entry about his dog, so I would suppose so.
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The only way he couldn't be is if he immediately disconnected his internet after posting that picture.
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It's whatever.
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whenever i kiss a girl i always remember to chew my stride gum beforehand and sometimes i leave it in my mouth so that we're done kissing she'll say "oh, thanks for the gum, puqtd", and i will stay smooth.
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http://www.halolz.com/2011/03/08/contests-meat-week-challenge-2/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJbiJVVMFcM.
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AD IS LOST!
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This has been derailed a bit, and I don't care.
Done. made a meme. Post it on 4chan.
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Great
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TEM, have you considered making an NFT? Could be very profitable.