Post by: Marionut#1 on June 12, 2003, 09:01:52 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/27/2003 4:00:23 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on June 20, 2003, 08:31:05 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on June 20, 2003, 11:13:49 PM
1. I've never even *BEEN* to your state.
2. I haven't worn pigtails since about age 4...although I *did* wear braided pigtails several years ago at camp... Too "girly" for me.
3. I never go anywhere, really.
4. I would have used better grammar ;P --"pee really badly"
5. I'm not the flirting type.
6. I've never even *HEARD* of Shopco.
Although I *am* blonde, and I tend to blurt out stuff like that in public--if I'm with friends or family and feel really comfortable. ...But if someone overheard me and gave me a strange look, I'd be totally embarrassed and blushing.
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: The Big Boo on June 21, 2003, 11:08:34 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on June 24, 2003, 08:57:00 PM
Once, in the Edmonton Mall, I was eating a late night dessert at their Death By Chocolate dessert restaurant. I was sharing a giant chocolate mousse with a strawberry on top with a good friend of mine. She was drinking a coffee, also. After eating a bit, I say, "Want the strawberry?" She replies, "Feed me a bite."
I suavely pick up the strawberry and slowly bring it up toward her quivering, eager mouth. A few of the strawberry seeds catch the light as I move the berry and glisten softly in the darkened restaurant. The soft murmur of far-away patrons echoes through the nearly empty building. A clock ticks quietly in the background. Her succulent lips part ever more slightly to accommodate the strawberry's arrival. It is mere inches from her mouth now. Hearts race. Time stands still. It is only a matter of millimeters.
The strawberry slips from my grasp, plummets two feet down straight into her coffee cup, and splashes steaming hot coffee all over her.
A day in the life of Lizard Dude. Thank you.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Chupperson Weird on June 24, 2003, 11:52:43 PM
Post by: marioguy on June 25, 2003, 09:10:53 AM
I''m the master of Mario and Pokémon!
Post by: Marionut#1 on June 25, 2003, 05:53:45 PM
Post by: nintendofreak on July 11, 2003, 12:58:52 AM
"I am not going on a diet!"
Post by: Dr. Mario on July 11, 2003, 09:33:44 AM
I have a story. The adjective would probably be ironic.
A couple years ago my mom desided that she wanted to remodel the bathroom. And one of the things that she wanted to add, was one of those little circut thingys (that shuts off the power if you get electricuted). I thought this was a joke. I'm like, "How many times has somebody flicked that light switch? Thousands, right. And nobody's gotten shocked yet!" Well, my mom installed it anyway. Then one day I happened to flick that stupid light switch, and I almost got elecricuted! That little curcit thing saved me a whole lot of pain.
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 7/11/2003 8:35:30 AM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 17, 2003, 07:10:33 PM
*Dad calls Lowes on Cell phone*
Hello can I have plumbing?
Thank you
Hello do you guys have swamp coolers?
Ok can one of those fit in the back of a Ford Explorer?
How much will it be?
Ok whats your name?
and your last name? Ok
*Hangs up*
*Talks it over with Mom*
*Calls Lowes back up*
Hello I just called and I think I talked to a guy named Dave?
He told me his last name...something with a K..I cant remember it...
Oh ya maybe it was Mario...
Hello?
Hi Mario I think I just talked to you...Ok ya we decided to take that swamp cooler...its the last one? Ok..
*gets off phone*
Mom: How in the world did you get Dave out of Mario?
Me: Geez dad was it like this: Hello is this Dave? NO its-a-me..Mario..
*Mom and I burst into Laughter*
Now if youll excuse me..I have to move atleast 2 dozen baby kittens out from underneath the front porch...no Im not kidding..the dumb cats seem to think it will make a GREAT home..it being 100 or above with absolutely NO humidity...but however its not the berries having about 50 cats living underneath your front porch...
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/17/2003 7:15:37 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 17, 2003, 08:08:46 PM
I'm still trying to figure out what that meant...
Anyways, so you have this heat too? Man, we don't get a break living up here.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 17, 2003, 08:11:17 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 17, 2003, 08:25:03 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 17, 2003, 08:26:23 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/17/2003 7:27:11 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 17, 2003, 08:55:48 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 17, 2003, 09:18:57 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 17, 2003, 11:12:35 PM
The Story Of Dukar
It all started at the 2002 Montana Class ABC Speech & Debate State Tournament. It was in Havre that year. I was sitting around between rounds with my best friend (also my partner in my event, Policy Debate) and two other really good friends of mine (partners in Policy, also). One of them spontaneously said, "Man, I gotta take a DUKAR!" I assume this derived from the word "dookie," as in a poop. One of the others said, "Did you just say...DUKAR?" All four of us thought this was absolutely hilarious and laughed for about five minutes. We then proceeded to say every quote we possibly knew, inserting the word "dukar" into strategic spots. Example: One small step for dukar; one large step for dukarkind. We even created the Theory of Dukartivity to explain why we lost whenever my partner had to take a dukar during the round but couldn't due to the obvious fact that we were kind of busy debating.
After we lost out, but still had to hang around, we engaged in some great childish pranks. We went into a large school bathroom. One of us went into one stall, one of us went into another stall on the other side, and the other two stood at the sinks, pretending to wash their hands. When a patron came in to do something, a sinkman would signal by coughing. This prompted one of us in the stalls to say, "Dukar1 to Dukar2! What is your dukar status?" The other replied something like, "Status is nominal, Dukar1. 34% roughage." Needless to say, it was great!
Time passed. Dukar quickly spread around the school, eventually jumping to other schools and to the general public. It soon became useable as any part of speech. The most common uses are phrases like:
What the dukar?
You're a dukar!
I've got to take a dukar.
Dukar!
That's dukar.
I dukared twice yesterday.
Moms. Dads. Little kids. They've all been heard to use dukar.
When the Fantasy Sports craze started and a bunch of friends and I started participating in many Private Leagues, a problem came up in our postings. Since we all wrote a lot on our league message board, we had to put "dukar" down in print. The good spellers among us all assumed it to be spelled "dooker." My spelling challenged friend (debate partner from above), however, started spelling it "dukar." He was one of the lead proponents of dukar and convinced one of the other debaters (from above) to also spell it that way. They said it was the Old English spelling; that's why it didn't look like "dooker." With two Dukar Founders advocating the "dukar" proposal, it quickly became the standard in dukar lithography.
Dukar
The Word. The Legend. The Phenomenon.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 18, 2003, 10:21:41 AM
If youll excuse me please..I got to take a dukar...and after that bring down more baby kittens...blasted cats....
BTW "Its not the berries" means: It isnt the greatest thing...
Post by: Black Mage on July 18, 2003, 10:54:02 AM
I don't believe I need to say anything.
Edited by - Black Mage on 7/18/2003 9:54:19 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 18, 2003, 11:35:49 AM
And I was Dukar1.
"At Dukar, we place our emphasis on serving you, supporting
you, and helping you be as successful as possible."
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Markio on July 18, 2003, 02:14:02 PM
When I was seven, I went to my friend John's house for the first time. He has an older brother named Bill and a little sister named Stefanie. That's when John told me that his little sister had a crush on me, and she was four! Now she's ten and doesn't anymore, Thank God.
Lizard Dude, how old are you?
Act your age, not your I.Q. Wait, what''s the difference?
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 18, 2003, 02:40:10 PM
And why does everyone ask how old I am? Maybe I should grow a beard or something...
I am eighteen.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: King Boo on July 18, 2003, 08:55:44 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 18, 2003, 09:02:34 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: The Big Boo on July 19, 2003, 09:57:26 AM
Well, my friend is one of those people who doesn't like to be pushed, and my science teacher (she has bug eyes, horse teeth, and skin like parchment) loves to bully kids around. But I never saw this coming. Okay, for homework, my science teacher made us do an outline and a chart about minerals. My friend (his name is Ricky) put his chart on his outline. This is what happened:
Ricky: And here's my homework.
Teacher: Where's your chart?
Ricky: It's on the outline.
Teacher: You were supposed to put it on another piece of paper.
Ricky: But it's right here.
Teacher *starts to walk away* Then I can't give you full credit for this.
Ricky: You better.
*Teacher stops and turns around*
Teacher: Sir, are you threatening me.
Ricky:*sarcastically* No, really?
Rob(me): *short, stifled, uneasy chuckle*
Teacher: Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to go to the principal's office.
Ricky: No.
*Teacher walks toward Ricky*
*Ricky picks up Rob's pair of scissors*
*Teacher takes away Rob's scissors*
Teacher: Give me those.
*Ricky walks over to Teacher's desk*
*Ricky takes Teacher's stapler*
*Teacher walks out of room, furious*
*Class bursts out into laughter*
*Teacher comes back, with 8th grde teacher and 3rd grade teacher*
8th Grade teacher: Ricky, you'll have to go see the principal now.
Ricky: Fine, but I'm taking this with me as evidence. *picks up chart from Teacher's desk*
Teacher: Oh, no you don't.
Ricky Oh, yes I do.
*Ricky and Teacher begin to phisically wrestle for the paper, paper rips in two*
*Other teachers break up fight, Ricky goes to Principal's office*
...And so ends the school legend of Ricky in science class. Ironically, after all that, Ricky only got one day of detention, and I got my scissors back.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 19, 2003, 10:56:36 AM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: King Boo on July 19, 2003, 06:41:33 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 19, 2003, 06:49:47 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 21, 2003, 02:37:11 PM
ROTFL, Big Boo. ;D That sounds like something my brother would do... Oh! I have SEVERAL stories just like that about him. I'll tell them later. But now... My Vacation to Myrtle Beach...
Crud. My mom's kicking me off now. Go fig. I'll tell it when I get back...
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Sapphira on July 21, 2003, 08:23:03 PM
First one:
Yesterday my family went to the beach (no crud). It was REALLY close--we even had a view of it (well, sorta ;P) from the hotel room. About 100-yard walk.
Anyway, I was tired, so my family went without me. I finally come down around 11:45, clad in jean shorts (which I NEVER where shorts--blech!) and a spaghetti-strap shirt over top of my swimming suit. (Eww eww ewwww! According to a survey, almost EVERY woman in the word thinks she looks better in *underwear* than in a swimming suit (I wouldn't go *THAT* far)--anyway, that's about how unattractive it feels.) So yeah, shorts, tanktop and swimsuit, not to mention my incredibly "pale" skin compared to everyone else on the beach with bronzed skin (Oh yes, and did I mention I don't really like my figure, either?) So I'm about as self-conscious right now as a nerd dancing in front of the whole school. ('Scuse the bad similie XD)
Sighing heavily, feeling the judging eyes upon me, I walk down the wooden stairs thinking, "Just get down to the beach. Find your family and get down to the stinkin' beach." I vaguely remember seeing a few people back at the stairs.
I continue walking, when I hear a low whistle and a voice lowly say, "Look at that hottie!"--obviously not for anyone but the speaker's friend to hear.
Feeling even more self-conscious, I take a quick glance around. I'm the only young-looking female within sight. I was shocked. They were talking about *me*!
Now THERE'S something I've never been called... Pretty, yes, but I wouldn't say I'm "hot." "Cute" is probably a better word. That's just so weird! ^_^
Adjective(s) to describe this story: weird, yet flattering.
Next story: ironic and hilarious XD
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Edited by - Sapphira on 7/22/2003 5:56:31 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 22, 2003, 11:26:13 PM
It involves [CENSORED]. Hmm, the story might require some censoring to meet Fungi Forum guidlines...
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 06:29:04 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 07:55:54 AM
The day we arrived at the Ozarks..I went out on the Jetski..with Nich...hes about a month older than myself..and (obviously) an 86er..
So anyway were motering out of the docks so that we could get past the no wake zone...this is about oh I dont know..5:00PM? and the sun is in our face...he leans over (just about dumping us)and cups his hand and splashes water all over his face..I then do the same thing..and ask why he did it...he says " Oh no reason..my face was just hot"
to which I replyied "Oh I thought it might have been an ancient Jetski ritual" We both laughed about that later..and we had a good time goin about 40 miles an hour..Man it seemed like we were going about 80...
so anyway..I hope you had a good laugh..more funny stories to come..
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Markio on July 23, 2003, 09:46:29 AM
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 10:10:48 AM
That story I just shared is starting to show my mild histronia. :P
==Next Story==
When we first got there, my dad and bro were at the beach while I was playing GBA in my room. My mom went out to get something and told me to pay attention if she couldn't get in. (The keycards were acting up)
After a while, I heard my mom when she got in. She was laughing, feeling incredibly stupid.
She said the key wasn't working, so she knocked and she knocked and she knocked.
No answer.
"Julie, answer the door!!" she yelled, continuing to bang on it.
A few minutes later, a woman came down the breezeway.
"Ma'am, can I help you?"
"Yeah, I can't get into my room."
"Oh. I think you have the wrong room; this is ours."
Major "D'OH!!!" She was at 210. We were at 209. We were razzing her about that the whole time!!
Well, two days later our whole family went to the beach (same day as the "hottie" incident. :P ) My dad and I stayed longer. After a few hours, we decided to head back. We carried all the beach junk back to the car. My mom sent my brother down to help. We finish, so he and I go back up (he having the key), while my dad closes up the van.
Of course, my brother, being the freak he is, runs on ahead of me and goes inside. Figuring he'll lock me out, I roll my eyes and continue up the stairs. I count the rooms down. *11...10...9...Okay, I'm here.*
I knock on the door. No answer. Again. No answer. Again, more annoyed.
"Steven, this isn't funny! Let me in!" (Sigh. Why are little brothers (well, *younger* is more correct, being that he's about twice my size @_@) have to be such a pain in the butt?
I'm REALLY annoyed now, continuing to yell at him to let me in. Laughing. I pause. I hear it again. I look down to the floor below me. I see my brother and dad.
"Julie, what are you doing up there?" my bro laughs.
I feel incredibly stupid. I was at 309. I wanted *2*09. Without paying attention, I had walked up another flight of stairs. D'OH!!!!!!!!! So much for making fun of my mom... >_<
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 10:17:23 AM
*grins evily*
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 10:25:32 AM
Oh, and that's "razz"--"Raz" is Raini's husband. :P
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 11:42:06 AM
Oh boy...now just to think up some hotel jokes....oh BTW what hotel did you stay in? Motel 6, Super 8? what?
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 12:01:38 PM
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 01:39:19 PM
BWAHAHAHA ;P
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 01:58:20 PM
We just happened to get a REALLY good deal on our hotel suite with a (sort of) ocean view. Normally we stay at Motel 6s and the like. So nya. :P
Oh, and I have another funny vacation story, but I'll tell it later.
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 04:18:22 PM
BWAHAHAHA!
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 04:27:49 PM
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Edited by - Sapphira on 7/23/2003 3:28:58 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 04:34:45 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 23, 2003, 06:05:02 PM
Me, Taking A [CENSORED], With A Bee
On one night of my recent trip, I camped out in the Cave Hills of South Dakota. That morning, I woke up a bit later then the rest of the family and because of this, they finished breakfast a bit earlier than me. I was just finishing my breakfast up, when they started off on a walk to a nearby mountain spring.
I was about to follow them. Suddenly, however, I was hit with the urge to [CENSORED]. I walked a little ways away from the camping area and found a nice 40 foot cliff. Thinking it would be great to [CENSORED] off of a 40 foot cliff, I stayed there and went about my business.
About seven seconds later, I heard a faint buzzing. Now the funny thing about buzzing, you can tell whether it's a fly buzzing or a huge, blood thirsty killer bee. This was definite huge, blood thirsty killer bee buzzing.
About one second later, I see a huge, blood thirsty killer bee slowly fly into my field of vision. "No problem," I think. As long as it doesn't come too close I should be fine. Right about the time that I thought this, the bee lands right on my [CENSORED]! I emit a short, "EEP!" and run for my life.
The real problem is that I was still [CENSORED] while running for my life, so things got a little messy. I ended up with [CENSORED]-soaked shirt and jeans, but retained my life and suffered no stings.
A day in the life of Lizard Dude. Thank you.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Edited by - Lizard Dude on 7/23/2003 5:08:13 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 23, 2003, 07:39:55 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*deep breath*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 08:39:08 PM
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Hoo! That was a good one, LD!! XD
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 23, 2003, 10:07:08 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 23, 2003, 10:26:52 PM
Last time I was in a hotel, I had to go get some ice, at about 11:30 PM. My mom was going to be in the bathroom so I would have to wait until she got out and open the door for me. I got the ice, and came back. I knocked on the door. She didn't come to let me in. I knocked some more and called her. No response. After a little while, a short woman in a yellow shirt and messy hair came to the door.
I was two doors down from the right room.
Eccentricity is my goal. "The stupidest thing I’ve ever heard just came out of Lizard Dude’s typing hands."
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 23, 2003, 11:01:41 PM
And at least I censored it, if that's what's got you in a bind...
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: King Boo on July 24, 2003, 02:25:49 AM
I was having a really bad day.
We went to McDonalds that afternoon.
I kept getting in trouble all day.
I got a cheeseburger & small chips
& Dad got a Coffee.
When i had finished my burger & started fighting with my bro,cant remember why.
And i accidently knocked a hot,piping cup of coffee onto my Dad.
All you could hear in McDonalds was ADAM!!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone in the place was looking at me.
I cried in the car all the way home.....
All these things happen in the life of The Pink Boo,friend of TMK.
Post by: The Big Boo on July 24, 2003, 03:02:24 PM
This morning, I had to get up at 7:45 AM to go to an Oral surgeon's office to get two teeth extracted. It isn't funny, but it's a story.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 24, 2003, 08:57:50 PM
(That was another story!)
Eccentricity is my goal. "The stupidest thing I’ve ever heard just came out of Lizard Dude’s typing hands."
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 24, 2003, 09:23:59 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 24, 2003, 09:43:29 PM
Anyway, goes to show you, don't mess with nature (especially by trying to urinate off a cliff :P). Nature is EVIL and will try to destroy you!!!! Beware!!! Beware!!! @_@
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Markio on July 24, 2003, 11:12:28 PM
Post by: Sapphira on July 25, 2003, 08:10:07 AM
I didn't mean it THAT way! Eww!
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 25, 2003, 04:02:37 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 25, 2003, 04:30:09 PM
Sorry, LD, but I have an innocent mind (uh, somewhat... :P)
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 25, 2003, 06:04:31 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 25, 2003, 06:16:31 PM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 25, 2003, 11:49:31 PM
There used to be a huge beehive under my house.
I really do hate/fear bees. Bumblebees and other killer bees like that. Honeybees are okay.
They haven't attacked my [CENSORED] while I [CENSORED], at least not yet... I usually [CENSORED] inside... although not all the time...
Eccentricity is my goal. "The stupidest thing I’ve ever heard just came out of Lizard Dude’s typing hands."
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 26, 2003, 05:23:03 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 26, 2003, 07:25:38 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 26, 2003, 08:30:02 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 26, 2003, 08:34:37 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 26, 2003, 09:58:23 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 06:11:53 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on July 27, 2003, 11:42:36 AM
Okay, here's my last vacation story:
It was around 8:00 or so, and my family went to this ice cream parlor. We ate outside. Right next to it was a grocery store, and my mom needed to get some things. She had finished but the rest of us were still finishing up, so she decided she'd go on ahead to the store.
At the time, she was wearing Winnie the Pooh overalls (ugh. Moms...). They have various pictures of him all over.
As she was walking away, I said, "Hey, Mom! You have Pooh on your butt!" teasing her since a picture of the character was on her back pocket, or her "butt."
She gives me a teasing scowl as the rest of my family's busting up.
Well, it just so happened that as I said that, a family came out of the ice cream parlor.
A little girl whispered, "I think that lady has pooh on her butt..."
"Are you sure?" another little girl asked.
"I dunno, but I think I heard someone say it."
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 11:53:11 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 04:17:09 PM
(Oh, and I wasn't mad or anything, but for that to be the funniest joke all day? Maybe my life is more funny or something...)
Marionut#1: Yeah! Funny looking! Ahhahah!
Lizard Dude: Drr...
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 27, 2003, 04:35:19 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 05:01:26 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/27/2003 4:04:18 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 05:04:59 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 05:12:26 PM
*hopes he hasnt run to the phone*
My parents would flip! Ill tell ya when..maybe later...that is if you even know my number hah you havent given me enough evidence that you actually know who I am...I know your real name...wasnt to hard...just detective work..
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 05:17:17 PM
P.S. You are certainly quite the detective, seeing that I POSTED IT!!!
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 05:23:19 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 05:28:57 PM
So...if that's not how you know, how *do* you know?
Also, the calling was just an idea when I realized it's free on cell phone. I guess I'll protect your innocent identity.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 27, 2003, 05:30:10 PM
Don't approve of you posting here, eh, MN? And I thought *my* parents were over protective... (Although I could understand WHY my mom would be for my brother; he's not one to make the greatest decisions...)
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 05:42:15 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 05:51:16 PM
Heh..I dont like tormenting anybody or thing..thats LD's description...heh my parents pretty much tried making me stop comeing here when everybody here thought I was a Nazi...geez..All I did was comment on how brilliant Their battle strategies were..they knew what they were doing and how to do it..I never approved of anything else pertaining to Nazism...dont know how everybody got that...but anyway water under the bridge..Heh thats there definition of trouble...geez O ya..and check your email again..if your still on..
BTW LD..your Email address is how...I knew your first name since you posted it in club 86...I still dont know how you would have got my full name though...thats why I dont think you actually know..;P Email me to prove it..
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/27/2003 4:58:03 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 06:03:06 PM
P.S. My email account was created for me by my dad when I was totally little. If I would have had control, it would have been way cooler.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 06:05:24 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 06:09:02 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 06:10:02 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 27, 2003, 07:51:43 PM
I'm not gone yet!
(I did not invent grapejuice. However, the founder of Welch's Grapjuice has the *exact* same name as my dad, down to the middle initial. Scary.)
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on July 27, 2003, 07:54:07 PM
Edited by - Sapphira on 7/27/2003 6:55:07 PM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 27, 2003, 09:27:37 PM
2. Winnie-the-Pooh is cool. How dare you say "ugh."
3. We'll miss ya, LD. When you're not here, at least.
Eccentricity is my goal. "The stupidest thing I’ve ever heard just came out of Lizard Dude’s typing hands."
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 28, 2003, 08:00:22 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: The Big Boo on July 28, 2003, 11:46:32 AM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 28, 2003, 01:00:29 PM
2. Geez, is it just me, or does it seem that the roles of people have reversed? Supposed "Grown ups" are starting to wear "kiddie"-oriented clothes,and throwing tantrums when their kids sports team loses a game, while Kids to day act more like adults, I mean heck, some kids my age already have kids...really sickening when you think about the whole thing...
3. HAHAHA ya right...oh LD..dont call me..Ill call you...;P I suppose Ill miss you somewhat...
This space is in honor of one of my favorite actors who died yesterday...This ones for you Bob..
IN MEMORY OF BOB HOPE
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/28/2003 1:15:52 PM
Post by: Sapphira on July 28, 2003, 01:50:55 PM
BTW, see ya, LD. :)
I was wondering whatever happened to Cabbog, too. (S)He used to post a bunch for a while, but then all the sudden just disappeared...
"Kids to day act more like adults, I mean heck, some kids my age already have kids...really sickening when you think about the whole thing..."
--I agree. Our society today is so morally decayed...It doesn't help any that this generation has grown up with all the media (which is so backwards), basically learning everything they know from it. Not to mention all the pressure from society, as well as negligent and not-the-best-role-model parents, which basically FORCES kids to grow up faster...
And people wonder why today kids have absolutely no conscience...
I have a friend, my age, whom I learned has a two-year-old son. She's also now engaged. How insane is that!? There was also a girl in my history class who got pregnant. I just sit there and wonder, "Why?"
And then my brother has a bunch of friends whom he knows takes drugs. (Luckily my brother is completely set against drugs, even if it IS just 'cuz of his potential football career, because he's easily influenced...)
I look at it all and think, "What a fallen society..."
(Pardon my lamenting...)
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 28, 2003, 02:08:31 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 28, 2003, 11:29:39 PM
Eccentricity is my goal. "The stupidest thing I’ve ever heard just came out of Lizard Dude’s typing hands."
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 29, 2003, 07:07:36 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Screech on July 29, 2003, 08:33:14 AM
I agree that our world IS screwed up in every possibe way. I actually know a person named cory, who is only about a year older than I am, who has a little girl.
It's sad to see him get up and ask the teacher to be excused so he can take his daughter to a doctors appointment.
The world would be a much cleaner place if people would eat their own trash.
Post by: The Big Boo on July 29, 2003, 09:44:54 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 29, 2003, 05:21:37 PM
I have to give this one credit.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 29, 2003, 09:54:07 PM
I need a point of reference.
Eccentricity is my goal. "The stupidest thing I’ve ever heard just came out of Lizard Dude’s typing hands."
Post by: Screech on August 01, 2003, 10:48:55 AM
The world would be a much cleaner place if people would eat their own trash.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on August 02, 2003, 12:35:17 AM
Eccentricity is my goal.
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 02, 2003, 07:26:54 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 02, 2003, 08:44:30 PM
Biologically, right on! Way to further the human race!
The harms outweigh the good.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Chupperson Weird on August 02, 2003, 09:06:36 PM
Eccentricity is my goal.
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 04, 2003, 02:10:43 PM
I forgot about this story. At an orientation-wide assembly, a bunch a resident hall staff was on stage. They all had to introduce themselves. The first guy got up and said something like, "Yeah, I graduated from here a few years back as an Engrish Major." I thought, "Whoa! Did that guy just say 'Engrish Major'!?!" Then the guy said, "Did I say Engrish? Haha! And I was an English Major, too! Haha!" Then I thought, "Oh, it was a mistake. Funny." Then the next guy got up and said something about English but accidently said Engrish, too. The crowd really laughed, but I wonder how many people knew what Engrish really was...?
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on August 04, 2003, 02:13:46 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 04, 2003, 02:19:43 PM
I Feel Asleep
That kind of thing. Horrible Japanese to English translation of the old days.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Sapphira on August 04, 2003, 02:22:55 PM
I will never completely understand all that "All Your Base" stuff...
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on August 04, 2003, 11:50:40 PM
Eccentricity is my goal.
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 06, 2003, 07:28:10 PM
Yesterday, I was riding back through town with my family after taking our boat out for an experiment. I was sitting in the back, casually reading The Physics of Star Trek, when my sister yelled, "Hey! It's Mario!" I looked to my right, and what should I see before my very eyes but some guy with Mario's physique on a motorcycle, wearing a red long-sleeve shirt and blue overalls. This guy stayed in the lane next to us for about a minute while my whole family started pointing and yelling, "Hey! You! Mario! Haha! It's Mario! Yeah!" Ah, that was the coolest part of yesterday.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: Markio on August 06, 2003, 09:02:19 PM
A couple weeks ago, I was at a baseball game(Giants vs. Indians) with my mom, dad, and one of my older brothers. During the game, My brother said,"I like in Dragonball Z how when they smile their eyes make little smilies." I responded with, "Tim, when they smile, their eyes make frownies." Somehow this made us laugh, because it's not every day you here the word frownie.
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 07, 2003, 12:34:04 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: The Big Boo on August 10, 2003, 08:04:42 PM
Post by: Markio on August 10, 2003, 08:13:02 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: TEM on August 12, 2003, 05:11:51 PM
1.Length
2.Length and Width
3.Length, Width, and Depth
4.Length, Width, Depth, and Time/Change
5.Infinite
Hows that for a story MUAHAHAHAHAA
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on August 12, 2003, 07:24:46 PM
2. Hey, you forgot the 0th dimension, nothingness or existing without any dimensions to measure.
Eccentricity is my goal.
Post by: Markio on August 12, 2003, 08:40:09 PM
What's a better adjective, unjust or incredibly cruel?
Hamster Sauce!
Edited by - Markio on 8/13/2003 7:15:19 AM
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 13, 2003, 06:51:03 AM
HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT!
I dont think Jman will be pleased...I know Im not..
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Markio on August 13, 2003, 08:16:15 AM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 13, 2003, 12:56:13 PM
Nice, Chupperson, on the 0th dimension, but 5.Infinite? I don't think so. The latest physics theories (string theory, M-theory, T.O.E, etc.) predict, nay, require there to be more than four dimensions. The additional D's are curled up ultra-small in our space, much like a hose appears to be one dimensional if viewed from a great enough distance.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: TEM on August 13, 2003, 07:44:46 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:47:57 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: TEM on August 13, 2003, 07:51:31 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:52:44 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: TEM on August 13, 2003, 07:52:48 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:53:19 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Sapphira on August 13, 2003, 07:54:57 PM
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: TEM on August 13, 2003, 07:55:57 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: TEM on August 13, 2003, 07:56:07 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: Markio on August 13, 2003, 07:56:07 PM
Don't swear...
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:58:08 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:58:19 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 14, 2003, 07:04:33 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Markio on August 14, 2003, 07:14:52 PM
Hamster Sauce! Yay!
Post by: The Big Boo on August 14, 2003, 07:54:35 PM
Post by: The Big Boo on August 15, 2003, 10:36:46 AM
My mom's friend's husband bought a kitten not too long ago. It liked to hide in things, like bookshelves and under the bed and other places. Anyway, this cat was hiding in the dryer. Because it was so small, they out the clothes in, and didn't see it and...well, it's gone now. (I told you it was sad)
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 15, 2003, 01:15:58 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: TEM on August 15, 2003, 02:23:06 PM
Post by: jon on August 15, 2003, 02:28:39 PM
And ive already left from Gamers Haven. Mario Master told me. Anyways, now Im only working on good sites that are updated more often. You havent updated in over a month. So why should you be talking?
My mom? That's a good one.
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: TEM on August 15, 2003, 02:28:39 PM
. No, seriously I just need some training when it comes to website building or I could be a M.B. supervisior person.
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: jon on August 15, 2003, 02:29:21 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: jon on August 15, 2003, 02:30:28 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: TEM on August 15, 2003, 02:31:57 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: TEM on August 15, 2003, 02:35:17 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: jon on August 15, 2003, 02:35:37 PM
Do you mean these forums?
AND DONT CALL ME JONNIE BOY! I almost gagged when you wrote that.
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Edited by - jon on 8/15/2003 1:37:24 PM
Post by: jon on August 15, 2003, 02:36:28 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 17, 2003, 06:47:27 PM
LOL
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 8/17/2003 6:18:24 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 18, 2003, 05:04:59 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven!â€
Post by: jon on August 18, 2003, 05:15:03 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: The Big Boo on August 18, 2003, 05:41:48 PM
Post by: TEM on August 18, 2003, 06:56:52 PM
I hope we'll be here when they're through with us.
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: TEM on August 18, 2003, 06:57:51 PM
Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
Post by: Markio on September 14, 2003, 01:01:08 PM
Girl 1:You leave my boy friend alone, you hear me?
Girl 2:But I like him.
Girl 1:Oh yeah? Well he's my man!
FREEZE! Boy counselor takes girl 1's place and becomes boyfriend.
Boyfriend:That's right, I'm her man!
Girl 2:I-I'm sorry.
Boyfriend:C'mon! you should stick up for me!
FREEZE! Girl takes counselors place and becomes girl 1.
Girl 1:Just stay away from my boyfriend, 'cause he doesn't like you!
Girl 2 starts fake crying.
FREEZE! Girl counselor takes girl 2 place and girl takes girl one place and becomes nice person.
Girl 2 continues crying.
Nice person:Why are you crying?
Girl 2:Because I don't have any friends!
FREEZE! I take place of of nice person.
Me:So? At least you don't have to live in a garbage can! You have no idea what it's like!
I start fake crying. We both fake cry and hug each other.
FREEZE! Guy counselor becomes girl 2, who starts cheering ME up.
Girl 2: You know what? let's go get hot fudge sundaes.
Me:But I'm allergic to chocolate!
Girl 2:YOUR ALLERGIC TO CHOCOLATE? *grabs my head.*HOW CAN YOU BE ALLERGIC TO CHOCOLATE?
FREEZE! girl takes boy counselor's place as girl 2.
Girl 2:Why don't you just use strawberry sauce?
Me:OK. *we start walking to corner.*
Girl 2:OH NO! The ice cream place is on fire!
Me:Run!
*we run to other corner, teacher says freeze, boy takes my place, and I don't remember the rest.*
The Lollipop Treeeee! -My friend Kyle Soutar.
Post by: Marionut#1 on June 01, 2004, 03:18:42 PM
never know somebody might get a kick out of these stories.
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Trainman on July 07, 2004, 09:51:37 PM
I concur with nintendofreak about LD dropping a strawberry into steaming hot coffee. Ouch. A good book, "Scalded to Death by Coffee."
"Big doubles, no troubles!" ~Todd Lyons
Post by: Markio on July 29, 2004, 10:00:52 PM
The adjective for this story could be either dumb, cool, or untrue, because I made it up.
I wish I was in the forest with a dragon right now.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 30, 2004, 01:25:05 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.â€
Post by: Lizard Dude on September 05, 2004, 07:25:42 PM
Two days ago I traveled to the local mall to purchase Pikmin 2. The shopkeeper said pike-min 2 and so I was kind of annoyed. Then he asked, "Have you heard about Donkey Konga?" I mumbled that of course I had and I planned on buying it the day it came out. Then he said, "Have you played Donkey Konga?" My face lit up with joy and I squealed, "You have the demo?!" Reply: "Well, we did have it, but we had to send it back." -_- Anyway, I paid for Donkey Konga as well so I get it when it comes out.
As if I hadn't already spent enough money, I then went to check out the arcade. What should I find but a machine that dispenses prizes. The prizes were stuff like GBA SPs, GBA games, PS2 games, MP3 players, digital cameras, and PC games. For 50 cents you got three stops of the spinner that landed on a positive or negative number. If you added up to six or more, you got the prize of your choosing. I spent $11.50 on it and managed to determine through random statistical sampling that it was rigged to make you get close to Level 4 and 5 but to always lose and go back down from there. I will win someday. Stay tuned.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.â€
Post by: NintendoExpert89 on September 05, 2004, 08:00:22 PM
The Story of my Computer Hassle
Because I had worked for more than 2 years on a paper route, I had made enough money to buy my own computer. I wanted my own since my family has been hogging the computer we had on the first floor, and it was as slow as Sony’s Playstation. I wanted my own computer, one I could use to work on homework, create and play games, email my friends, and have a fun time with in case I got bored. So one warm night in August, my older brother drove me to the Electronics Store to buy a computer.
At the store, I observed many things- Televisions of all sizes, VCR’s, CD players, Stereos, Surround Sound Systems, DVD players, and many video games. As we arrived in the Computers section, I looked at many different brands. I found the cheapest one; it was produced by a company called EMachines. It had a fast speed, a large memory drive, and a full color monitor. I purchased it with $400. Until we had arrived home, I had no idea why it was sold at a low price.
My brother set up the computer on my desk, and he connected all of the wires together. At last, we tested it, and realized it was a defect: A broken keyboard, and a worthless floppy disk drive. We returned it a few days later, and brought back a different model, but produced by the same company. The problem with this one was that it wouldn’t power up. Though all the wires and connectors were where they should be, it wouldn’t turn on. My brother started to become so irritated and angry, he started to cuss. The next day we returned the entire model, and I got my money back, but I bought a model that wasn’t produced by EMachines, and it worked. Today, I have a great computer to on which to work.
- May 12, 2002
UPDATE- September 5, 2004: My computer's registry is screwed up, and is now one of the slowest computers on Earth.
Romance is for the weak-minded.
Post by: Koopaslaya on September 05, 2004, 08:16:44 PM
The door opens, and the lady at the counter (obviously shocked at the size of our group) Yells "CODE RED!! CODE RED!!" We're all like WTD?
So we all order, and after we all do so, she tells me (In a slightly foreign voice) "You should call in advance, for big group, you get 10% off! That like 30 dolla off 100 dolla food!!
I'm was just like, note to self, never come here again.
Push Button...
Receive Bacon! ®
Post by: Koopaslaya on September 05, 2004, 08:16:44 PM
The door opens, and the lady at the counter (obviously shocked at the size of our group) Yells "CODE RED!! CODE RED!!" We're all like WTD?
So we all order, and after we all do so, she tells me (In a slightly foreign voice) "You should call in advance, for big group, you get 10% off! That like 30 dolla off 100 dolla food!!
I'm was just like, note to self, never come here again.
Push Button...
Receive Bacon! ®
Post by: Koopaslaya on September 05, 2004, 08:16:44 PM
Edited by - Koopaslaya on 9/5/2004 7:26:21 PM
Post by: Red Paratroopa on September 06, 2004, 04:54:47 PM
"I''m a stupid fatty who swings his arms from side to side and pushes a button to receive bacon. The universe is permeated with the odor of Shawne Vinson. Does that make me a nut?"- DotheLizardkoopaChupVinsonluigi
Post by: TEM on September 06, 2004, 07:57:19 PM
Part 1
I called really butch-looking woman, "sir", in an audible and soundly fashion. She also had a butch companion, that was also a woman, that also had a she-mullit.
End.
Egg Power
Post by: Lizard Dude on December 10, 2004, 07:05:02 PM
<Lizard_Dude> What the...
<EclipsedMoon> ?
<Lizard_Dude> Just got an email - Vote for Most Addictive Game and win Mountain Dew
<Lizard_Dude> Ah, it's related to the Spike Video Game awards
<EclipsedMoon> You're in Montana, that stuff's free.
<Lizard_Dude> This reminds me of yesterday.
<Lizard_Dude> Deezer will like this
<Lizard_Dude> He likes stories of my misfortune
<Deezer> :D
<Lizard_Dude> Anyway, bought this 12 pack of Mountain Dew Pitch Black
<EclipsedMoon> Aladdin was the best movie ever because there was that funny little monkey AND that funny little parrot.
<Lizard_Dude> I was running back home and as I rounded this corner, the cardboard handle slot thing broke and all 12 cans plummeted to the ground
<Lizard_Dude> Mountain Dew Pitch Black was shooting everywhere
<EclipsedMoon> Oh, I hate when that happens.
<Lizard_Dude> I was also trying to carry an ice cream bar and a can of Chunky soup
<Lizard_Dude> I stuffed as many cans as I could into the shredded box
<Lizard_Dude> Which was 8
<Lizard_Dude> 4 cans were left on the ground
<Lizard_Dude> 1 was totally busted
<Lizard_Dude> and 3 were still good
<Lizard_Dude> So I run back and leave the 8 cans I collected, 2 of which were busted, at home
<Lizard_Dude> Then I return to my original crash spot about 60 seconds after the accident
<Lizard_Dude> and the 3 good cans were ALREADY GONE!
<Lizard_Dude> While the busted one remained
<Lizard_Dude> So within a minute, the scavanger underworld residents of MSU-Bozeman had stolen my pops
<Lizard_Dude> So I bought 12 pops. 6 survived the trip.
<Deezer> Oh man
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.â€
Post by: superstarMASIAH on December 11, 2004, 06:37:29 PM
YOU HAVE JUST READ A TRUE STORY. NOTHING IN THIS STORY HAS BEEN MADE UP OR FABRICATED.
I AM THE MAN WITH THE SILLY MUSTACHE!!!
Post by: Markio on December 11, 2004, 07:24:10 PM
A few days ago, I was in Gym class, which was after lunch, which was after a Mass our school had in the Gym. Because we then had Gym, we were the ones who had to stack up all the folding chairs, put them on the racks, and roll them under the stage. Pf course, one of the choirs, Chamber I think, had sang during Mass, so there were some more chairs on stage. A few of us went up there, and what do you know, a piano was on the side. Since the gym teacher was gone right then, I went over to it and started to play the Super Mario Bros. Underworld Theme. Two guys were standing there and said something like, "Hey, that's awesome!" And there you have it.
(Author's Note: I usually hate Gym, so this was a great turnaround. I now know of the bliss of situational irony.)
Post by: boomstix on December 11, 2004, 08:31:59 PM
Or two, I guess.
Story Number One: Maniac Michael Magee
So, in first grade, there's this kid at my school, named Michael . He had some major temper problems cause of a mental disorder. One day in the wintertime, at recess, him and I were having a snowball fight, when one of the supervisors comes up and says "NO SNOWBALLS FIGHTS!" the kid purposely ingores her and chucks a snowball at me, which i dodged. The supervisor gets an angry look on her face and begins to walk towards Michael, and he hurls a snowball right into her chest.
She explodes, and starts chasing after him, screaming randomly. He was, and is, a very, VERY, fast kid, and so he outran her, ran right into the street, and promptly ran right down to an intersection, not waiting for the light, and runs across the street. Now at this time, everyone in my grade was looking at him run. We saw the supervisor sprint up to another, say something frantically, and then sprint after him. Meanwhile, Michael had crossed the street and we couldn't see him anymore. Then, when we think it was over, and they had caught him, we saw him running the opposite direction, though still going away from the school. A second later we saw THREE POLICE CARS chasing after him, with that same supervisor following in close pursuit. That was the last we saw of him for the next month, because he got suspended from school.
We later learned from him that he had ran all the way to the local swimming pool (which is a mile and a half away from our school!) and was cornered on all sides by policemen. They actually had to have two policemen wrestle him into the car (and remember, this was a first grader)
Story Number Two: Whoops
When I was five, I had this really bad habit; whenever I decided to go to the bathroom in my house, I pulled down my pants and underwear, and THEN walked to the bathroom. This went on for a few months. Until one day I was watching some Nick Junior show. Since the beginning of the show I had needed to go to the bathroom but I didn't want to miss any of the show, so I waited until the end. By then, I really needed to go. So I got up, pulled down everything, and began walking. Halfway there, I sorta *lost control* and I let loose. God, that was gross. My parents sent me to my room because they were so disgusted with the mess. I'm not so sure that was such a bad punishment, cause boy did it STINK down there
"I could have more fun watching paint dry...
C''mon Blue! Dry Blue! C''mon!"
-The Decline of Video Gaming
Post by: Sharpen on December 13, 2004, 02:05:53 PM
I know those sorta stories too! Once in my childhood I knew a girl of my age living next door, I was about 6 years old. I always visited her in her garden, were she was wandering around nude. I never stepped into her yard, don't know why. But it may have been a good thing.. While we were laughing and having fun she kinda "lost control" too, and pooped right in front of me. Next time, wear a diaper, girl!
A year later I literally sh*t my pants too because of a traumatic experience (for a child..). I got myself a skyblue teddybear at Christmas that year, it was one of those Cuddle Bears or something.. When you spoke and pinched it's hand he repeated after you. I had fun playing with that bear, he imitated everything I said! Even when I hopped off the stairs on my butt, he imitaded the hopping sound. But once upon a night Cuddle Bear was broken. I was on my way to the bathroom and I took the bear with me, ofcourse playing with it. I pinched it's hand and loudly he answerred: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP, and so on.. That's when it happened, but one thing.. My mom has never ran the stairs that fast..:P
Close the World, Enter the Next
-Serial Experiments, LAIN-
Edited by - Sharpen on 12/13/2004 12:07:54 PM
Post by: Sharpen on December 13, 2004, 02:57:35 PM
Now, this is what overcame me today. Normal day at work, doing my same boring thing: order picking. Wandering the shelves, picking the jeans.. But always the good helping hand to those who are scared of climbing the shelves. We only decide to climb the shelves after all, when we have to. Like, reaching the box on top of the shelves wich is all in the middle. It's like climbing trees to me, same fun. I climb everything that is climable, even over boxes on top of the shelves if I have to. But most of all, that is kinda wiggly.. I thank myself for being short(wich forces me to climb often) and lightweighted. One of the staff girls named Chantal asked me to help her get some jeans out of the highest placed boxes on top. It looked easy to reach, so I was on my way up there. Standing on the topshelve I saw that karton was a couple of rows away, so I decided to climb those rows to it. Those boxes weren't that strong anymore, and Chantal already warned me they were about to collapse. I told her that I was causious and knowing what to do. I bent over the last tower of boxes so I could open the next on top with the jeans Chantal needed, and threw down some pairs. While I was twisting my body throwing and grapping another pair, the row of boxes I clamped on suddenly stumbled sideways. In a second of a reflex I kicked my leg against the row of boxes behind me, so after then I was literally doing the split among two wiggly towers of boxes. It really looked like a crazy circus-stunt, all though it wasn't that fun. I didn't know to put my feet, so I had to jump off on the tiny space left on the shelvetop. While I did, another pair of heavy boxes were about to fall on me. I literally slapped one of those with my hand away off the shelves, and thank God no one was standing underneath it. I climbed down, taking a deep breath together with Chantal who almost freaked out sawing me hanging there. I laughed about it after all ofcourse. ..But it was lesser fun knowing my working knive was still upthere, on those boxes..
Close the World, Enter the Next
-Serial Experiments, LAIN-
Edited by - Sharpen on 12/13/2004 1:01:10 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on January 30, 2005, 05:39:47 PM
Show Me Your Hottest Moves
So while Wag was busy leaving Missoula to judge state, I went to Missoula for the DDR tournament. The machine was DDR Extreme and about 20 people were there, including 8 guys from Seattle and the rest mostly from Missoula with a few Bozemans. It was double-elimination perfect attack, which meant whoever had the most perfects total after three songs (or four if you made the Extra Stage) was the winner. The Seattle people always held the bar with both hands and stomped the pads SUPER hard, but got many perfects that way. It took a dukar long time for all the rounds to go by, but when my first round came up, I got pwned by some tiny little girl. Then my second round came up and I tied the dude on the first song. Then he beat me by about 35 perfects on the second song. Then I beat him by about 20 perfects on the third song. So I lost twice and was one of the first eliminated. At least I got to play a lot of Keyboardmania, but not any Drummania because some kids were having a birthday party and were on it 24/7. I never saw who won in the end, but I bet it was some Seattle person.
The moral of this story is: The people who enter DDR tournaments are butt-good!
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.â€
Post by: boomstix on March 04, 2005, 11:42:00 AM
And BTW n00bs this is a really great topic (as Lizard Dude previously mentioned) so I suggest reading the whole thing. Also, nobody forget this topic! If you have a story worth sharing, please do so!
If a tree falls in the woods, do all the others laugh at it?
Post by: Lizard Dude on March 17, 2005, 11:37:37 PM
Tbe Horror
So my friend is over at his little cousins' house and a little girl comes out of a nearby room and says, "Who put glue in the GameCube?" My friend goes, "@_@" and immediately dashes to the scene. He there finds a GameCube to which some kid has smeared Glitter Glue all around the lip of the lid and then closed it. The glue is getting fairly dry by this point, but my friend immediately sets to work with Q-Tip and Kleenex to remove it. He eventually got it open and further cleaned it, but it was a close call.
And the game that was almost sealed inside forever: Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen - Sweet 16: License to Drive.
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.â€
Post by: CoconutMikeNIke on April 01, 2005, 11:13:23 PM
Alright, it was probably mid-July this year, I had been mowing the postage stamp sized yard earlier that day, and threw my shirt to the deck from below on to the deck. I felt productive that day, and cleaned my room (My mom was getting annoyed with it anyway). I don't remember the exact time, but it was starting to cool off, so I went back outside to grab my shirt. I got to it and bent down to get it when my face went right through a spiderweb. And trust me, it wasn't something like a daddy long-legs web. This web belonged to a pretty large spider. My hand was already on the shirt when I realized what my face was in, and I shot straight up, half bouncing, half-running around the deck, slapping, no, whipping, my entire head with the shirt. (I'll let you know that I am horrendously afraid of spiders. I actually slept in my bathtub for three nights because I saw a spider on the wall near my bed). The spider wasn't in the web luckily, but when I turned back to the door, my mother is on the floor, laughing at me. She hadn't seen me go into the web, just running back and forth hitting my face.
Three days later, I opened my emails and my mother had sent me a letter with funny definitions, like Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with, and there was a note to check the last one-
Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
Coconut Mike-N-Ikes->Marios preferred candy
Post by: Suffix on April 01, 2005, 11:24:50 PM
Post by: Markio on April 01, 2005, 11:30:40 PM
“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view.†-Atticus Finch
Post by: Lizard Dude on April 03, 2005, 11:31:55 PM
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.â€
Post by: smfan1085 on April 05, 2005, 09:29:32 PM
I've got a funny story, but I'll have to type it down here some other time.
"You know what we''re having for supper tonight? Boneless, skinless chicken chests." ~My Mom
Post by: Markio on April 05, 2005, 10:04:32 PM
“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view.†-Atticus Finch
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on October 21, 2005, 08:39:36 AM
I’ve got a few stories, some funny, some weird, and... kinda sad I guess (as in pathetic).
Now you're Driving with Power!
Before I got my driver’s license my parents got me a N64 steering wheel from a garage sale to help me practice driving. I felt really excited at first. Then I actually started using it and couldn’t stand it. Now you have to know that my room is super tiny and I share it with my younger brother so there’s not much room to play my games. So I sat on my bed to the right of the TV and had the wheel in my lap and the pedals on the floor by my feet. I played Mario Kart 64 and Star Wars Pod Racing (that I borrowed) and tried to control people with it but it was just to difficult for me. So I ended up giving it away to someone’s used items store and now someone else may be going through what I did. However I did get my license so it’s okay. (E I):o{D
A Hike With Spike
At camp this summer I rode a horse named Spike and this was the first time I had ridden a horse in a really long time. At first I was scared like crazy that the horse would just go flying someone and kill me (that's how paranoid I am), but then it got pretty fun. I just wish that he diddn't have stop to eat plants every few seconds. I had the only horse that was a PIG!
Donkey Bongo Bozo
When I first got Donkey Konga for Christmas it was really hard for me and didn't make any sense at all. Come to find out, I had the bongos backwards.
I wish I had time to read all of these stories. They look interesting. Maybe I will later. And speaking of stories, Sapphira, do you plan to ever finish your story or just leave us hanging forever? I miss Sapphira being here more often. She and LD are hilarious (and while I type this I can hear Luigi laughing on WTMK from Luigi's Mansion). Speaking of stories, Sapph, do you plan on ever finish the Prophecy or have you given up on that?
Man, I don't know how to get my titles just one space above the paragraphs without having a space between them. How did LD do that?
(E I):o{D___(--I I):o(D___(o 8(= P)___(= (: )@)___(3 I)}:O})+)___<( )=(: )) )
Edited by - Yoshisaurus Rex on 10/23/2005 4:09:56 PM
Post by: smfan1085 on October 21, 2005, 10:47:43 PM
_______
j00r 73h r0x0r, d00d!
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on October 22, 2005, 12:11:30 PM
I'm surprised that NE89 had so much trouble with his EMachine. My computer is an Emachine and it's worked excellent so far. Maybe in a few months it will start to do crazy things. And speaking of not wanting to use public restooms, one time at camp the sewage pipes needed to be emptied so people could only use the porta potties. Since I can’t stand using those filthy things I held my bladder when I had to go. But after a few hours it really started to hurt so I submitted to beast and won back my unsanitary sanity.
Hey, I remembered yet another story! But hold on because this story is a little suspenseful.
End of the Rope!
Not very long ago my family went to a fun harvest party that we go to every year at this family's house in the country. We have hay rides through the woods, lots of great food, huge camp fires, walks in the woods, and plenty of fun with our friends from church.
Well, near the end of the night when it was almost time for me and my brother to leave, I saw a few of my friends running somewhere through the dark and I decided to follow them. I didn't know what they were up to... until I got there and knew right away. The rope swing. The family has a pond behind their house and a large tree over it with a rope tied to a big branch and hanging from it close to land. My friends love to grab it, swing over part of the pond, and then swing back (but you don't want to fall in because it's so cold at night). It’s really crazy but so much fun to watch them do it.
So, since I’m more brave than usual this year I decide to try the rope swing and see how great it is. So I grab it and decide where to swing from. There’s 3 levels you can choose: on the ground close to the water, on a small hill a big farther away for a bigger swing, and finally a round picnic table on top of the hill for a really big swing. I went for close to the water since this was my first time, and then grabbed the rope and got ready for it. I suddenly got nervous though and my friends cheered me on to do it and finally and stop thinking about it and just went. So I swung over the water… and suddenly lost my grip! I crashed into chilly waters and my friends screamed. There was a lot of horrible things in the water like huge rocks, sharp objects, and… I’m pulling your leg right now! Lol.
No, here’s what really happened. The first time I swung over it and I came back just fine. Now that I knew it wasn’t so bad save the rope burns, I walked up to the ledge for a much bigger swing. More hesitation at first and then I went. It’s a lot of fun to swing over a pond in the dark. You feel the air hitting you when you fly and get a nice view of the water. But suddenly, and I don’t know why or how, my left hand slipped off the rope, and I was left hanging from it by one arm. As I flailed in the air from losing half my grip I thought, “Oh no. I’m really going to fall in. I’ll break my legs and then be in a wheel chair. And I won’t be able to play Mario Mix! Aaaagggh!†But my body refused to let me take the plunge. Adrenalin kicked in and my right arm cluthced to the rope like crazy. My arm hurt a lot but I had to do my best and hang on. And somehow I did. I couldn’t fall in no matter what. And I didn’t! I came back to land with only one arm and my friends were laughing like crazy. They thought for sure I would fall in and so did I. It still feels like I did fall in. Only a miracle from God that I made it. If I ever try that again I’ll make sure my arms are in better shape (and my arms hurt a lot after that night). Then I’ll go for the table swing.
For another suspensful story but not nearly as good, I could also tell you all the story of how I got my Sonic doll (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/topic.php?topic_id=78255&forum_id=1058&Topic_Title=Roller+Coaster+Tycoons&forum_title=&M=0&S=True) (at the bottom of the page). You can choose for yourself if you want to read it.
(E I):o{D___(--I I):o(D___(o 8(= P)___(= (: )@)___(3 I)}:O})+)___<( )=(: )) )
<p>Edited by - Yoshisaurus Rex on 10/23/2005 4:11:49 PM
Post by: smfan1085 on October 22, 2005, 06:34:51 PM
The story you just told was good. I especially liked the leg-pulling part. XD
I also looked at your other story about the Sonic doll, and you said something about a caricature someone drew of you, and about you thinking of having the image hosted on someone's site. Have you thought of using Imageshack or Photobucket?
_______
j00r 73h r0x0r, d00d!
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on October 22, 2005, 10:02:55 PM
(E I):o{D___(--I I):o(D___(o 8(= P)___(= (: )@)___(3 I)}:O})+)___<( )=(: )) )
Edited by - Yoshisaurus Rex on 10/22/2005 9:07:50 PM
Post by: Ultima Shadow on October 25, 2005, 12:34:55 AM
Anyway, I was sitting next to one of my friends on the library computers, having just borrowed an access card. We didn't have any internet money left (too much TMK and Slime games), until I recalled we could play Internet Checkers (bundled with XP) without internet money! So, we opened it up, and, while my friend was playing, I proceeded to grab the mouse when he didn't have it, scroll down the list of chat phrases and select a random saying. However, there was one that really caught my eye- 'King me!'.
After that, I always went on the computers, played Internet Checkers, and repeatedly said 'King Me!' until the opponent either turned chat off, or left. I also won several checkers games, too.
However, there was one time- my opponent 'King me!'d back! It was a heated match, but in the end, I won. It was heated- but one-sided at the same time. I finished the game with 11 pieces, three of them being kings. Meanwhile, my friend got addicted to Reversi...
THE END?
I''''ve noticed something amongst some people''''s signatures- they''''re not always perfektt.
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on October 29, 2005, 09:41:02 AM
So you've heard some of my stories and they may be okay, but for some truly awesome stories you’ll want to click here (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=4935.msg391028#msg391028). I guarantee you won’t be disapointed!
Here’s a few mini stories that you might like to hear that involve car accidents.
Ditching the Wagon
When I was six years old our family was driving out of town in our station wagon to go shopping. Then all of a sudden this car came straight at us and Dad had to swerve off the road into the ditch to avoid him. Thankfully besides the fear we were fine, but Dad got hurt a little and his neck has been sore from that ever since. I feel very sorry for him about that. But something kind of humorous I said after the incident has stuck with me since then, “Does this mean we’re not going to Wal-Mart now?â€
Lord of the Cars: The Two Terrors
Years later as a teenager, a friend of mind had a fun birthday party. After the gifts and delish cake, everyone drove separately to an out-of-town theatre to see The Two Towers (that was a blast). I rode with this guy in his car and with two others guys. On the way to that town, we followed behind a vehicle going slower than us. But I think it may have been going the speed limit. Anway, my friend tried to pass a car in the dark on a two-way lane. Apparently this was a bad idea and a bad time to pass because as soon as we got over to the left lane a vehicle came straight towards us. As the lights illuminated the insides of the car and my friends yelled his name, I had my first near-death experience. Everything just moved in slow motion (and possibly I may have seen some of my life flash before my eyes). We immediately moved back into the right lane, missing the car by a few feet. Even when we arrived at the theatre I felt terrified. But before long the movie helped me forget about it. Until afterwards.
<p>Btw, if you clicked on that first link I posted… ha ha ha! I tricked you! Or maybe I didn’t. Probably not. Sorry, that was kind of mean. The real place is actually here (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=4935.msg391028#msg391028). Hope you’ll forgive me for that.
(E I):o{D___(--I I):o(D___(o 8(= P)___(= (: )@)___(3 I)}:O})+)___<( )=(: )) )
<p>Edited by - Yoshisaurus Rex on 10/29/2005 8:54:37 AM
Post by: Glorb on October 31, 2005, 02:31:06 PM
Scary Incident in the Car
This one time when I was a little kid, my mom left me in the car for a few minutes to get something in a gas station. Those three minutes were very scary. I saw this car pull up near the car, and two guys came out. One walked next to the car and strted to point at it and talk to the other guy. I was pretty paranoid, so I thought they were going to get me or something. Anyway, they didn't, and it really wasn't all that scary.
Scary Movie
This other time, I saw a movie so scary I peed my pants.
Scary Movie #2
Back in 1999, I went to go see Scary Movie, and it SUCKED.
Okay, fine, there were only three tales, and they weren't scary. Sorry.
-------------------------------------
"How are you gentlemen !! All your base are belong to us !! You are on the way to destruction. You have no chance to survive make your time. HA HA HA HA ...."
-Cats, Zero Wing (Genesis)
Post by: Markio on October 31, 2005, 06:25:02 PM
That story is ironic.
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on December 02, 2005, 10:36:46 PM
A Dog-Bite-Kid World
Another time when I was younger, our family went to someone’s house and I got bit by a dog. I had to have some stitches placed in my cheek and because of all this I became very scared of dogs for a long time. But eventually I got over my fear and now we have a big (stupid) colley dog at our house. But I still need to get those stitches removed some day.
99 Bottles of Aspirin
Now that it’s December I believe it’s time for a quick little Christmas story. One time when my school went christmas carolling around town (we had a small school), me and a friend had a great idea. While we rode in one of the vehicles we started to sing 99 bottles of beer on the wall. But THIS TIME we wanted to see how far we could get through the song before we went completely insane (or got kicked out of the van). So we sang and sang and “passed out more and more bottles” until our voices started to hurt a lot and throats dried up. We kept going on though and finally we went through the entire 99 bottles! (and then I concluded it by singing “Another whole shipment of beer on the wall!”) It was so funny that my friend and I talked about forever. I recommend that anyone give it a try mostly because it’s fun to annoy people with. Ho ho ho… ha ha ha!
Wait, this is my fifth post on this page? Good grief, Charlie Brown!
And I think I already asked this but can anyone help me find a specific thread? It involves dares or crazy stunts or something like that and I feel like reading it for some reason. I know it involved a kid peeing on his sister's toothbrush XP but that's it. I appreciate any help.
Post by: smfan1085 on December 05, 2005, 01:08:53 PM
A dog that bites a kid viciously in the cheek deserves to die a horrible and painful death. >:(
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on December 05, 2005, 05:16:50 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 30, 2007, 12:20:03 PM
------------------------
Toilet Toils
So, on Thursday morning I wake up and take my morning dukar, except it was more like a morning chunky diarrhea. After pooping I flushed but it didn't go down. I plunged and waited a little while, and then flushed again. The toilet bowl filled to the brim with my plunger-mushed liquid poop, and then went down to almost nothing but toilet paper and splatters around the entire inside of the bowl. I decided not to bother with it anymore and went to Safeway.
After a long shift of work, I came home and instantly noticed the house smelled like rotting feces/pee. I went upstairs to the bathroom and noticed that my towel, yes, my bath towel, was lying soaked in the middle of the floor, which was covered in liquid. There were also pieces of napkins everywhere and I noticed that neither my other bath towel nor my hand towel were there. I ran downstairs where Matthew was sleeping on the couch, where I noticed my other towels catching the dripping from the ceiling. I screamed, "What the heck!" at Matthew, but he just groggily ignored me and said, "It's your poop."
As it turned out, Matthew woke up after I left and tried flushing the toilet, causing the bowl full of chunky brown soup to overflow and drench the entire floor. Of course, he uses MY towel to wipe up the floor. He then goes downstairs and is doing whatever, when a huge strip of plaster on the ceiling rips off due to the liquid poop pressure from above. Also, a huge bubble is forming next to it for the same reason. After the bubble got too big, Matthew took off his shirt, grabbed a cake pan and a potato peeler and stabbed the bubble, catching the splashing waterfall of waste in the cake pan, which he (of course) threw in the sink. He then put my other two towels under the two spots to catch the remaining draining.
Anyways, we were both furious at eat other and our ceiling has poop stains on it, has a sliced bubble, and a huge line of plaster just hanging there. I spent like an hour cleaning the soaked bathroom with plastic bags on my feet and then had to go to Wal-Mart to stinkin' buy towels so that I could take a shower after wading in poop for so long.
It wasn't a good scenario and I don't know what we'll do about the ceiling, but at least the bathroom floor should stop being sticky after a week or so of walking on it.
Post by: Glorb on July 30, 2007, 02:52:27 PM
Post by: SolidShroom on July 30, 2007, 04:24:16 PM
Post by: MaxVance on July 30, 2007, 04:51:35 PM
Post by: Suffix on July 31, 2007, 12:04:40 AM
(And in other news, this means I can use the thread when I have a story to tell that I don't want to put in ANGST or HOPEFUL! Yes!)
I was actually going to tell my teeth pain story here, but I didn't want to invoke stupid posts crying "BUMP!" *cough*glorb*cough* Or at least crying "BUMP!" and then taking it back somehow.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 31, 2007, 12:23:21 AM
ANGST and HOPEFUL suck. Go (insert adjective here)!
Don't care what other people think - post where you want when you want.
Post by: Vidgmchtr on July 31, 2007, 12:54:36 AM
At around 2:30 PM, I changed into my swimsuit, gathered stuff in a bag, hopped onto my bike, and headed to the public pool (because I don't have one myself, and none of my friends are inviting me to theirs). 20-25 minutes of pedaling later, and I am there. I put the bike in one of the bike spots, locked it, and took my bag and headed over to the admission hut, where I paid and got in. I put my bag (containing a towel, my wallet, my iPod, and my glasses case) on a bench, took off my glasses, freed my hair of its ponytail, removed my shirt, and sprayed sunscreen all over myself. Without hesitation, I hopped into the pool, but kept close watch of my bag, fearing someone would steal it.
The pool was relaxing, and, save one previous unpleasant experience, my first swimming experience of the summer. Unfortunately, two girls, around the age of 14 or 15, saw me and decided to talk to me.
"TWO girls, Vid? Lucky guy."
Right. k.
Anyway, they said "hi" to me. Not finding anything wrong with it, I wave back.
"What's your name?"
"Michael."
"Hi, Michael."
"Hi."
"How old are you?"
"Eighteen."
"Are you enjoying yourself?"
"Yes."
Note as they are talking to me, I'm continuing to look at my bag, checking to see if it hasn't been stolen yet. That, and I was trying to show the girls I really wasn't interested in chatting with them. Starting to feel this was futile, I quickly give up and continue swimming around, floating on the surface of the water, going underneath and going limp, waiting for my body to return to the surface, and other things I like doing in the pool.
"I like your hair."
"Thanks."
"Who does your hair?"
"I do." (Well, all I do is shampoo and condition it every night)
"Could you do my hair?"
"No."
"Why is your hair long?"
"Because I want it long."
"Why?"
"Because I like it that way."
"It makes you look kind of like a girl though."
"k"
"But you aren't a girl."
"You're right, I'm not."
After these conversations with my mostly one-worded replies, I start to mumble to myself: "Ugh, stop talking to me. I didn't come here to talk. I came here to enjoy myself. Geez."
Oh, and I'm still eying my bag.
One of the girls then pointed to a fat balding man in the pool.
"Is that your father?"
"No."
"Where's your father, then?"
"Not here. I came here alone."
"You drove here?"
"Yes." (I don't feel like being honest with these girls anymore.)
"What do you drive?"
"A van." (This is technically true now, but I didn't take it with me to the pool, because I still lack a license.)
These pointless conversations continued, and most of it is worthless, nothing I deem important enough to recreate here, but at one point one of the girls talked about her brother, who apparently thought I was hot, which was the reason why the whole chat sparked in the first place. Finally, I decided to get out of the pool and dry off on the bench where my bag was for awhile, and waited for the two girls to leave themselves. Eventually, they left with a guy who I am assuming was said brother of one of the girls.
I thought over the reasons why they decided to talk to me:
1. They thought I was attractive (Eh, probably not.)
2. They thought I was ugly (Hm, probably...)
3. They wanted to bother me (Also very possible.)
I opted for the latter two options, I then went back into the pool for a little while longer, came back out, and left at around 4:45.
I don't really expect any of you to find this story funny, but I felt like sharing it anyway.
Post by: MaxVance on July 31, 2007, 01:19:02 AM
I was actually going to tell my teeth pain story here, but I didn't want to invoke stupid posts crying "BUMP!" *cough*glorb*cough* Or at least crying "BUMP!" and then taking it back somehow.Don't worry, I would have defended you.
Post by: Lizard Dude on July 31, 2007, 01:33:21 AM
I enjoyed reading the story and did find it funny.
Post by: Vidgmchtr on July 31, 2007, 01:38:47 AM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 31, 2007, 12:06:34 PM
Post by: The Chef on July 31, 2007, 12:56:27 PM
Post by: BP on July 31, 2007, 02:08:54 PM
"Hey, can we go somewhere to eat? I'm starving."
We went to a Jack in the Box. She paid for the movie so I paid for her curly fries and shake as well as my double bacon ciabatta cheeseburger (a bit pricey but worth it). Upon getting home my mom hugged us both and shouted things like, "YOU'RE ALIVE, MY BABIES ARE ALIVE!!!" I was smart in having the car go to a place I could get food--it was clear that neither of my parents were going to make dinner. I ate my burger and curly fries (we didn't stay and I didn't want to get my shorts all greasy or risk dropping anything) and returned to my room.
I get my own license in seven months.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on July 31, 2007, 07:53:14 PM
Post by: BP on July 31, 2007, 08:52:20 PM
Post by: Markio on August 14, 2007, 11:00:52 AM
Last year I was portrayed a lead role in my school's musical! I was one of the T-Birds in Grease, and I sang two songs, one of which was a solo! Oh wow! Anyway, the musical is really stressful, because not only is it difficult to maintain whatever self-esteem you have while wearing makeup and dressed as a 50's greaser, but it also takes up a lot of time and patience. Now, this story isn't really about the musical itself, but rather something that happened at the same time.
It was Preview Day, the day where the school has an assembly and all the cast members leave class early to get into costume and then perform the worst songs in the show so people will come and see the better ones fresh. So the cast and crew is in the gym/auditorium, and what do you know, I'm standing off to the side when a spotlight shines at me! So like any other person, I try to duck out of the spot, but the tech kids are following me with it, so I run towards the stage, where I can lose it among everyone else. Unfortunately, we don't have a pit, so some fake walls were set up for the Orchestra on the side of the stage, and I didn't see the teacher coming, and-- WHAM! I collide with him, nearly knocking him over. He stumbles a bit, I stand up in shock and just sputter out, "I'm really sorry, I'm so sorry, sorry sorry sorry--" to which the teacher yells, "Are you out of your mind?!" and walks away angrily. Now, as if I wasn't nervous enough, I have to perform and dance in front of a school with the thought of some teacher out there with a grudge against me. And lately I was under way too much stress because I wasn't meditating or trying to relax, so basically I ended up crying a bit and being consoled by Sandy Sophomore(Sandy was double cast, the other's a senior). But the show must go on, and I was being a doofus. So I wiped my tears on someone's costume, pumped my fist determinedly, and when those curtains opened up, I smiled like an enthusiastic gangster and pelvic thrusted like no one's business!
Anyway, I had run into the teacher in my costume, so my only hope was to be as un-Grease-ish as possible around school, which was easy, since I'm not really a musical person(I do it for the comedy and the female dancers, if you catch my drift). However, after only a couple of days, I was called out of my chemistry class, and who am I talking to, but THE TEACHER I RAN INTO! So he interrupts my automatic apology and in a sickeningly good-natured way explains that we both could have handled the situation better, but it's important to be safe at school. He then related a story of when he ran into a classroom and hit his head on the top of the doorway and got hurt, and said that accidents happen to everyone. He must have noticed me staring at the floor like an ostrich, because he asked if I was OK and I said no because I was still really sorry about what happened, but he just dismissed it and said everything was fine between us. I then went back into my classroom, threw up on a girl, and then her best friend punched me in the nose. Just kidding, I walked back in and sat down, shaken about the encounter.
I guess many of you may think I'm a sissy for crying, being in a musical, or not throwing up on anyone during this story. But let me tell you, there is nothing more emasculating than getting in trouble while wearing makeup and having your hair gelled back. This story also serves as a warning: if you see the light, do NOT run from it. Or maybe just be careful where you aim a spotlight. So there!
Post by: TEM on August 15, 2007, 10:22:10 PM
I then went back into my classroom, threw up on a girl, and then her best friend punched me in the nose. Just kidding ...
I lolled and rolled!
This is a story all about this one time I was at my best friend Mitchel's house. Me, him and a few other guys were playing touch football in the street. Afterwards we all just chilled out on the unsheltered concrete slab that served as a porch. We were all pretty tired and goofy at the moment from the prolonged running around, that sort of mood where anyone can say anything and everyone just laughs until they can't breath. It was a glorious day and we languished on the hard gray "porch" and laughed it up at absolutely nothing, it was a perfect day in the innocent days of my youth.
Then there was an unexpected event. We all heard a thunderous noise, and stopped laughing like maniacs for a moment; several fighter jets had just flown very low over the residential neighborhood. We were all of course used to the occasional thumping helicopter, but this was something unusual. Then there was Zak. He wanted to get a closer look, the rest of us were still in shock and just kind of sitting there, but Zak ran across the lawn to get a better view of the rapidly retreating hind ends of the jets. My pal Zak was never the brightest of the group, he wasn't real aware of his surroundings either; he was the kind of guy that would walk into a door frame or trip over his own feet for no real reason. Zak bolted into the street after he crossed the lawn.
Before any of us could even think he went from running to splayed out on a car's hood to laying on the street in the manner of a moment. All the good feeling of the day vanished in that moment. Me and Mitchel stopped staring in horror and ran up to Zak's unmoving form. The driver got out and said "Is he okay?! Oh God why did he run out into the road like that?". Then Zak's mom got scared and said You've moving with your auntie and uncle in belair! I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. Okay, the tone of the story is completely wrong, I just did it to make the Belair less expected, my friend Zak did in fact get hit by a car in the fashion described, but in vast contrast to the mood presented, it was one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life.
Thank you.
Post by: Markio on August 16, 2007, 03:30:34 PM
I forgot to mention that I'm taking a class this year that the story's teacher most likely teaches every time. Only if by luck will I not have him.
Post by: Suffix on August 20, 2007, 05:41:45 PM
Quote
PING Ian "Suffix" Meharg (345-B Honors Hall, P.O. Box 1700, Pullman WA): 176 data bytes
Send response via IRC.
I laughed so hard that the people inside the "Hill Office" made strange looks at me. I guess I'll have to stop exploring the campus and get back into IRC!
Post by: MaxVance on August 20, 2007, 05:53:51 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 20, 2007, 06:30:23 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on August 20, 2007, 10:25:17 PM
Each story took place on a Sunday. I shall tell the more recent one, first, which details the things I did at the reunion party.
After my father and I went to Queens to see an old friend of his, we went back to my old hometown, Valley Stream. I entered an ice cream parlor, one that once held my 3rd birthday party. I was the first one there. I put my stuff (my yearbook, a camera, and an old class photo of a few of my friends) down at a table, and looked around the room, thinking about how much smaller it looked compared to how it was 15 years ago, though it was exactly the same room.
After about 5 minutes or so, the first few old friends came in. We exchanged greetings, and talk about how time has changed us. As more time passed, more people came in. We sat down at the tables, though at one point we had to shift to the other side of the room, as another party of about 11 people also came in. We all told stories about what happened to us after many years of not seeing each other. We wondered who had changed the most.
I won. When I was still living in Valley Stream, I was short, skinny, had very short hair, a gap in my teeth, and VERY hyper. They were looking at pretty much a completely different person, one who was fat, had long hair, a not so huge gap in his teeth, and considerably much calmer and quieter, and had a pair of glasses.
To prove this, I shall give images:
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fphotos-b.ak.facebook.com%2Fphotos-ak-sctm%2Fv71%2F87%2F99%2F802835362%2Fn802835362_515869_6024.jpg&hash=392c05ac2840ebea1e10ac5858f0d420)
I'm in the bottom right corner, with the green shirt and blue pants, holding up the sign.
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fphotos-c.ak.facebook.com%2Fphotos-ak-sctm%2Fv123%2F222%2F87%2F1377540168%2Fn1377540168_27870_4686.jpg&hash=e703511907c2a86aec7d504b74445bfb)
Do I have to point out who I am?
So, after about an hour or so at the parlor, the party had moved to a nearby diner. Some friends parted, others joined us. We talked a bit more about our old school, and wondered if old teachers we had were still there, and the daily routines we had.
After that, the party had pretty much ended, though I tagged along with a few of them to a house in a neighboring town, for another "party".
Hm...I don't think I'll be getting into that. After that, I was driven back to the parlor where my father picked me up and drove me back home.
-------------------------------------
This story took place on the previous Sunday, in a place called Cherry Grove (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cherry_Grove%2C_New_York).
My father and I went down there, as I was feeling bored and felt my summer was being wasted in the house. We went down to the town that had the ferry service that'd take us to the Grove, on Fire Island. As we waited there, more and more people were coming to the waiting spot for the ferry.
After that, the boat had arrived, and we boarded it. Some couples had brought dogs along with them. A few of them decided to remove their shirts. As we went down the ocean to the barrier island, I looked around me, seeing many happy couples, conversing, talking about their plans when they get there. The ride wasn't long, maybe 10-15 minutes in length.
As we docked, we were able to hear the dance music at a nearby bar blasting very loudly. You also couldn't walk a few feet without finding a rainbow flag. There were no roads, just a boardwalk. The houses there are usually just rented out for the summer, but there are many in number, and a few people do live there permanently. Our first stop was the beach. We went down the boardwalk, passing by many houses. We got to the beach, and my father immediately found who he was looking for: his old boss.
His old boss is a lesbian, and lives on a house that borders the beach. She was there, with her partner, and a few other women. She took us back to her house where I was able to change into my swimsuit. We returned to the beach, and settled down there for about an hour to an hour and a half.
After that, we had left the beach, and returned to the main part of the Grove, near the dock. We were both hungry, so we started to look for a restaurant that wasn't blasting loud dance music, and were quickly able to find a nice restaurant. Once we were seated, my father started to joke around with the waiter. I considered uttering a "try living with him" when the joking refused to cease. After the banter, we ordered our food, and my father asked me what I thought of the place. In all honesty, I found it to be very nice. A little eccentric for me, but still very nice.
We ate, and by the time we finished, we quickly left to catch the ferry that'd take us back.
I hope I did not bore with my two stories.
Post by: MaxVance on August 20, 2007, 11:02:16 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 21, 2007, 12:07:45 AM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on August 21, 2007, 10:45:09 AM
They were both interesting. How did you and all your old friends organize the party?
We all talked on Facebook, wanting to do something like a party. We all said a few dates when we'd be free, and a place was quickly decided on.
Vid still loves green shirts!
Heh, you know you're not the only one to say something like that. :P
Post by: Markio on August 21, 2007, 10:45:48 PM
Post by: Jman on August 21, 2007, 10:53:36 PM
One day, I was extremely bored. I had recently bought the first volume of Animaniacs, so for no real reason at all, I began imitating various characters. I found out that I am actually half way decent as Yakko and Pinky from Pinky and the Brain. I shocked myself when I did the "Hellooooo, Nurse!" yell almost to perfection. So anyway, that's my story. Good night, everybody!
Post by: The Chef on August 22, 2007, 10:41:58 AM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on August 22, 2007, 11:06:13 AM
Post by: Mr. Melee on August 22, 2007, 04:02:23 PM
So can everybody else who has watched the cartoon.
Nope, not me.
Post by: CoconutMikeNIke on August 29, 2007, 11:23:58 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 29, 2007, 11:39:42 AM
Post by: BP on September 05, 2007, 09:27:26 PM
So, coincidence, or divine intervention? Either way, hilarity.
Post by: Lizard Dude on September 08, 2007, 05:05:06 AM
For the last year, the upstairs window of the house straight across from mine (4th spike from the left) has always been brightly aglow. You couldn't tell while the Flame Orb ruled the sky, glaring down upon us and burning my skin like the lava in Metroid, but you could tell during the night. And I'm no stranger to night (like look at the time this was posted). That light was always on. I never saw a person in there, either. But the light was always on.
Tonight it is off.
Maybe they finally found the corpse?
Post by: Jman on September 08, 2007, 11:36:35 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on September 11, 2007, 05:33:05 PM
10:10 AM
My father busts through the front door, telling me to wake up. I do so, and as I dress, he constantly says to hurry, and threatens to leave without me, but is shown to be lying when his cell phone rings.
"You're a TERRIBLE liar." I said from my room.
10:15 AM
We get into his Mustang. We drive to the high school where my sister still attends, as her classes have finished.
10:20 AM
We pick up my sister, and then drive to the college I attend. As we do so, my father asks me when my classes will end today. I reply:
"5:25. I might have a ride home, though. Tell mom that she should wait for me to call first."
10:30 AM
I'm dropped off. I take my books and horn out of the Mustang and it drives away. I walk to the building I need to be in in half an hour.
11:00 AM
My class starts.
12:15 PM
My class ends. I go to the student center building and rest there for an hour and 45 minutes, as my next class wouldn't be until 2.
2:00 PM
My next class.
3:15 PM
That class ends, and I wait in the student center for band class to start at 4.
4:00 PM
Band starts.
5:00 PM
Apparently, by this time, my father had called my mother to pick me up. At 5:15. Ugh...
5:20 PM
The conductor ends class about 5 minutes early. A friend of mine looks at me and gives a "you need a ride?" gesture. I nod (because I do not know my mother has been waiting outside in one of tha parking lots for 5 minutes) and we leave.
5:45 PM
We get to my house after getting gas.
As I entered the door, I settled down my things, and hear the phone ring. I answer it, and my father is on the other end:
"Hello?"
"Mike?"
"Yes?"
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HOME WITHOUT TELLING US? YOU IDIOT, MOM HAS BEEN WAITING IN THE PARKING LOT FOR YOU!"
"WHAT? WHY DID YOU TELL HER TO PICK ME UP? I SAID I'D CALL IF I NEEDED A RIDE!"
"I TOLD HER YOU NEEDED A RIDE AND TOLD HER TO WAIT THERE AT 5:15!"
"THAT ISN'T WHAT I TOLD YOU TO TELL HER. I said if I needed a ride home, I'D CALL FIRST."
This led to us shouting over each other and him hanging up on me. I called back and told him to never do that again, and asked for an apology for calling me an idiot when I was not the one at fault. He hung up again. I redialed, and didn't get an answer from him again.
So, yeah, pretty annoyed right now.
Post by: Lizard Dude on September 11, 2007, 08:39:55 PM
Also I seem to recall reading several other stories frighteningly similar to this one.
Post by: Lizard Dude on September 14, 2007, 04:34:57 AM
"I'm taking a piece of this."
Kyle takes a piece of the book manager Becky's gum. It's the fancy kind that pops through foil out of little plastic bubbles. It's green.
"Dude sweet, I'm taking one too."
It's totally psychological, but gum always tastes way better coming out of little plastic bubbles. You feel like you're eating a special delicious treat, nicely sealed inside a marvel of modern science just for you. I didn't even want gum. But doggone it I wanted plastic bubble-contained gum.
"Chris, don't tell Becky we took her gum."
Chris nods and off we go, chomping our awesome gums.
About three minutes later, a horrible peppery taste instantly hits me. This is not like normal gum turning bad. Normal gum starts with a strong flavor that slowly peters out and the bad taste is really just the absence of good taste. My gum was different. My gum had spontaneously launched full-scale chemical warfare on my tongue.
Stubbornly, I keep chewing. Starving kids in Africa would kill for this gum. Two minutes later I can't take it anymore and spit it out. The gum had only gotten nastier, unlocking layer after layer of new areas in the flavor hellscape that is this gum.
I go to Kyle.
"Dude, is your gum nasty?"
It looks like me bringing it up suddenly makes him realize.
"Holy this is bad gum."
He spits it out.
"Yeah, guess what? Becky's a hardcore smoker. We stole her nicotine gum."
That's right. I had been chewing smoker gum, nicotine now coursing through my veins. I read that once the gum flavor (quickly) wears out, you're supposed to hold it in your gums like chewing tobacco. But I definitely hadn't. And now I know: nicotine tastes nasty. Very nasty. I will never eat nicotine gum again.
Anyone got a light?
Post by: MaxVance on September 14, 2007, 05:32:51 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on September 14, 2007, 05:45:31 AM
Post by: PaperLuigi on September 14, 2007, 03:41:11 PM
Post by: SushieBoy on September 14, 2007, 04:53:08 PM
I have a story, which happened just yesterday, but I'm not sure what adjective to describe it with.
WARNING: Some language is present.
So after I had walked into my last class of the day, Science, I noticed it was a substitute teacher. Apparently our regular teacher had gone out of town for some reason... So then she passed out our assignment for the day, so after she was done passing them out one of my friends Edson ask her "Mrs. Armstrong, can we write on this sheet?" (We had a class set, so we had to use our own paper and write down our answers there) So then the teacher responded, "No, you can't write on this sh*t... I mean sheet," The class was then sprinkled with giggles. I laughed as well but I didn't want to over do it so I wouldn't get in trouble. Amazingly she had no shame in her mistake, she just went on normally like it didn't happen.
Post by: Jman on September 14, 2007, 09:29:50 PM
Post by: BP on September 14, 2007, 11:06:42 PM
Story one: John beat one of those "guess your weight or age" people by two pounds. He paid three dollars to pay and won a lousy Wonder Woman headband that hardly fit around his head. Around five o'clock, the person in the Wonder Woman costume was outside The Riddler's Revenge as we were standing around thinking of what to do for the next hour (I wanted to ride Superman but nooooo). John wanted to ride the Jet Stream again, so we had him put the headband on his head and get a picture with Wonder Woman (on my cell phone! :D). We then rode those boats about five times yelling, "We're pirates!!" at the people on the lower path.
Story two: We were at an In-N-Out on the way home. When Graydon got his burger John and I stepped over to the counter to wait. Realizing we were in the way of people John says, "Stand back." I then announced, "Stand back! This is a danger zone!" A little girl looked at me when she walked and bumped into somebody else as a result.
Post by: Bigluigifan1.0 on September 15, 2007, 06:39:13 AM
I'll tell you, my favorite ride there is definitely Goliath. (For those who don't know, it's sort of like the main attraction roller coaster ride there, pretty huge stuff.) We went on every ride more than once with the exception of a couple, and in a total, we went on Goliath about six times throughout the one day we went. One of my friends was talking about how this kid would yell out his origin (Origin being Scotland.) while he took a large leap down from a pole while he was connected to a supporting rope to keep him from falling and breaking his head open and stuff like that. So I had come up with an idea to yell "SCOTLAND!!" as we flew down the largest and steepest hill on Goliath. So we did it a few times, and to my surprise a few people started to yell the same within the following drops on the ride. Then there was this ride which I disliked incredibly. We only went on it once. This was an old wooden roller coaster that made me feel like I was having a heart attack. The only part I enjoyed was the part where we were in the line to leave the ride. Seriously, that was the most rough roller coaster I have ever been on.
We also went a ride called Superman... it was the one that some girl got her legs chopped off from. Amazingly there were quite a few in line despite most knowledge of this accident. So one of my friends goes on and asks when were strapped in, "Did someone really get their legs cut off on this thing?". The lady nearby replied "I don't know." or something to that effect. We were pretty much laughing quite a bit after that, but the ride was quite uncomfortable, but it wouldn't have been so bad to ride again. We went on another ride that had something to do with Joker from Batman. I think the name was Mindbender. While it was slightly rough, we all could handle it and had fun. There was one part in the ride that dipped in slightly as it came to curve to the first big drop, but we all yelled "SCOTLAND!!" at that certain part when it was clearly the incorrect time and we all looked like idiots, but we forgot about it and yelled "SCOTLAND!!" at the first "real" drop and the following loops.
That was the best Six Flags trip I had ever been on, and it stays that way to this day.
Post by: BP on September 15, 2007, 12:04:54 PM
Tatsu is pretty cool, too. It's this one that was opened just one day after our eighth grade trip You're strapped in with your chest facing down. Most intense loop ever.
Post by: Jman on September 15, 2007, 02:25:18 PM
Post by: SushieBoy on September 15, 2007, 03:45:09 PM
Post by: Suffix on October 02, 2007, 08:25:40 PM
Tonight I present a most amusing story about my conscientiousness, a trip to Safeway, and my obsessive desire to brush my teeth after breakfast.
GREEN BUS STOP
A trip to Safeway was in order when I found I lacked many key college items: soap, cereal, and mouthwash. I bought a serving of Frosted Flakes with milk from the Hillside Café and climbed up to the bus stop near our bookstore, where I ate the cereal. I went to Safeway, got stuff, and then waited for the bus to return.
Unfortunately, the irritating taste of cereal remained in my mouth. I couldn't brush my teeth like I normally do... So I decided to use some of the mouthwash I had bought previously. There wasn't anybody at the bus stop but me, anyway. However, I did feel rather awkward about using mouthwash while cars were rushing by, for some reason. I managed to suppress such emotion to use a small amount of the green stuff, but when it came time to spit it out into a nearby garbage, I felt I had to wait until less cars were going by. The garbage can had a normal, plastic cover so you could insert stuff through the sides, and I determined that it would just look too strange for me to lean over and spit it out when cars were going by.
After waiting a minute or two, I saw an opening: a car was turning right quite a distance from me, stopping all traffic from going my direction. I leaned over, and prepared to spit inconspicuously... when I saw that about seven cars were coming down the road in my peripheral vision. I abruptly sprayed mouthwash all over the trash can, making quite a mess of the can and my calm expression! I leaned back into the metal bench and suddenly started laughing my head off. I laughed for at least two minutes, until tears came to my eyes.
When I retold this story to my suitemates at dinner, I laughed almost as hard as I did at the bus stop when I imagined how it must have looked to the drivers for me to abruptly spray green fluid all over the trash can, then fall back in hysterics.
Post by: BriGuy92 on October 02, 2007, 08:53:12 PM
MY FIRST JOYRIDE
Ok, so this happened when I was nine years old. There was this huge hill behind my house, and this hill happened to have a rock wall at the bottom. So one day, I decided to put the hill to good use: I was going to roll down it in a Cozy Coupe. You know, one of those little plastic cars that little kids ride around in. Like this. (http://images.ridingtoys.com/mgen/master:LT064.jpg) So anyway, I got inside the thing, my legs sticking out of the front. Keep in mind that I was WAY too big for it. So I went down the hill. It went fine. The car stopped at the bottom, and I got out and wheeled it back to the top. I went down the hill again. The car didn't stop. I freaked out. A lot. I was kinda wedged inside the thing, so I couldn't jump out. The car reached the rock wall and tipped over. My forehead made good friends with a piece of granite. I went to the hospital to get eight stitches and a Harry Potter-style scar.
Post by: Vidgmchtr on October 02, 2007, 09:06:08 PM
(story)
I lol'd. Hard.
Post by: Bigluigifan1.0 on October 03, 2007, 02:39:46 PM
Today we went into a couple of games, one was something called Taxi. In this game there would be four chairs, and a line of people. Four people would occupy the chairs, and whoever sat in the "driver's seat", was the driver, all others in the taxi (which is just the set of four chairs.) were considered hitch-hikers.
In this game the driver would act a certain way and talk a certain way, all the other passengers of the car would have to act the same way, while the driver comes up with a conversation. After a while, the driver is supposed to say, "Oh. A hitch-hiker, I'll pick him up." or something similar. When that happens the driver gets out of the "car" and leaves while a new person comes in through the backseats. When that happens, they all move up a seat and have to act a new way. Well, there had been a series of weird-awesome things happening in this game, but, I think all of the students laughed the hardest when I was in the backseat, and a girl is in the driver seat, acting like one of those stereotypical hyperactive girls that always blurts something like "Omigosh!" or something like that throughout every sentence. So she has to ask me, "Like, what's your name?!". I respond, in probably the oddest way "My name is like, Mason. Omigosh!" Laughter from all over the theater room ensued from quiet a while. I didn't mind it, I had way too much fun to think about anything else.
When I actually get up to the driver's seat, I decide to give a slow and low-pitched voice. It was like a slow-action scene thing. The funny thing was, my teacher was sitting in the back, jumped up and yelled "Look out!!" So slam the pretend brakes (No one seemed to notice I slammed too fast for my act.) and the supposed car stops. My teacher does a bit in which he was flying to the front of the car in slow-motion, breaks through the pretend windshield and falls to the ground. It was an awesome moment. Then I decide to say "Hey, a hitch-hiker, I'll pick him up." and my act stops.
There was one more game as well. This was much like Taxi, but focused on only two people. My teacher set up some chairs to be like a counter of a store. One person starts out behind the counter, and it's all up to the two people to pretty much decide what the store was. When the customer person comes in, he'll move a certain way and talk a certain way, the person behind the counter has to act the same way. There were a lot of great acts. When it comes down to me, I hold both of my shoulders up and put my hands in my pockets as I walked briskly to the counter, I said in a Sid the Sloth voice (If you don't know what that is, watch Ice Age.) "You got any cigarettes?" The guy behind the counter can't even seem to mimic me very well and couldn't hold back laughter. He asks me what I said and I reply in the exact same way "Do ya have any cigarettes?" After that, we couldn't build much off the conversation, since we were both struggling to keep a straight face.
I can't say that I've ever enjoyed a class this much.
Post by: Vidgmchtr on October 03, 2007, 09:12:41 PM
THE DESTRESS EXPRESS
Twice a month, massage therapists come to the student center of SCCC to give free, five minute massages. Finding this to be a good deal, I went to the building after all my classes ended. My back has endured a lot of weight in my middle and high school years, so I felt it would be good for it.
I put my name on the waiting list (it wasn't long) and sat in the nearby waiting room, watching the two massage therapists, a man in his late 40s or early 50s, and a woman in her 30s, rubbing and kneading the backs of random students. Then came my turn.
"Michael?" The man asked. I replied with "Yes, am I next?" He pointed to my name on the list, verifying that I was the right Michael. I confirmed, and sat in his massage chair. He told me to remove my glasses, as they would not fit through the head rest. I removed them and placed them on the arm rest, where I also put my arms. I then relaxed as he played with my back area with his hands and elbows.
It really did feel nice, despite the pressure put on my back. I closed my eyes and thought of nothing, and listened to the soothing music they were playing. I basically let myself drift away, oblivious to the fact that the legs of the massage chair were weakened by time.
He continued kneading my back, pressing it, rubbing it, and I basically was unresponsive as I let myself go.
Then the legs of the massage chair broke. The chair fell forward, and I opened my eyes through the head rest to see my glasses fly off the rest, and onto the floor. Other students looked on in horrifics. It must've been scary to see. They rushed over, and barraged me with "are you alright?"s and "oh my gosh"s. I said to all of them that I was just fine (and I was, no scratches or bruises, the chair itself stayed intact so I didn't touch the floor), and was more worried about my glasses, as I saw the left lens pop out of the frame, and wasn't aware if it was alright or not. A girl handed me both the frames and the lens that popped out, and I wondered out loud if it could be fixed. The man who massaged me was able to place the lens back into the frame with minimal trouble. I put the glasses back on, and walked from the wreckage that was the man's massage chair.
The other massage therapist offered to continue where the man left off once she was finished with her student. I accepted the offer, and waited. Her chair definitely looked newer and stronger. When she finished, I got in, and took my glasses off, but kept them in my hands this time. She kneaded my back just as the man did, and was a little harder (it still felt great), while conversing with the man about the broken chair.
When she finished, I wrote on the comment paper for both of them, both positively, despite the accident that happened with the man's chair.
Post by: Lizard Dude on October 04, 2007, 06:39:56 PM
Story would have been better if you had actually smashed helplessly face-first into the ground and if you hadn't used the non-existant word "horrifics" but all together a very entertaining read and the best story I've seen you post!
Post by: BP on October 05, 2007, 07:48:20 PM
Today I got off the bus and Muff appeared in front of me outside the driveway, from behind. This is a serious "UM WHAT" because there are fences around the entire perimeter of my house, and then a fence around the driveway. I turned around in fear that I might see one (or more... uuuuuh) of the other four dogs, hit, but I only saw Frank on the other side of the road, alive. I made sure no cars were coming and called him over. The other three were in the yard (Molly, so cute, went crazy when Muff came into the yard, overjoyed).
I immediately told my sister about it when I entered the house. I went outside to look around for a hole under a fence but didn't find anything. We decided to keep them all inside until how they escaped was clear. Only Molly and Zorra were in the house so I went out to get Tink, Muff and Frank. Only Tink was there.
After about twenty unsuccessful minutes of searching we got in her car and checked around the road and orchards. Gave up. I found them out by the chicken coop (I checked there before but they weren't there...!) and it was all good. When my mom came home with Taco Bell (wrong, of course), she went to check for herself where they had gotten through the fence. It was a hole dug under the fence by the chicken coop that I didn't see (obscured by something). Boarded up now.
The adjective? Suspenseful? Relieving (to me)?
Post by: Vidgmchtr on October 06, 2007, 10:19:21 AM
None of our cats are allowed outside, for fear they'd run away. Yet, somehow, Ginger got out. None of the doors to the backyard were open, even the sunroom. I at first thought it was a stray cat that wandered into the backyard. I looked again, and it looked like her.
She didn't seem to want to leave the backyard, she just wandered around and played with the birds that flew around the backyard. I got out, picked her up, and brought her in. Not long after, she was outside again. I repeated said actions, and made sure any doors were closed and locked.
When mom got home, I told her about how she got out, and not knowing how. It was later found out that there was an opening in my sister's room near the air conditioner in the window that she was able to crawl through. It was later boarded up.
Post by: Markio on October 29, 2007, 08:14:09 AM
Mark the date, historians! October 28, 2007. Markio got his first kiss ever. And it was from a girl! And people saw it! Here's how it went down...
It was open house at my school, which means almost every student must be there to talk about activities they do, usually by standing around a respective booth. Many other students lead tours around the campus all day. Myself... I was constantly rehearsing scenes in the school theater for the show in the fall. However, the lead/one of my best friends was leading tours because he overachieves like a fox, and so the director had me go up and say his lines and improvise his blocking.
It was kinda funny, because at one point his character is talking to my real character, and then we have a few lines together and he leaves, so I was talking to myself onstage for a bit.
But....
We decided to do the first scene. So at one point, I was left onstage with the girl who plays my mistress. At some point, she's supposed to kiss me. I figured we'd fake it or something, because I wasn't the actual actor. So the moment comes up, and I'm thinking, "Is she going to do-- oh." We did it. It was wet. But not gross. My first kiss! And only 17 years old.
Post by: BP on October 29, 2007, 06:06:02 PM
I've mentioned or suggested it before, one of my friends is a teacher's son, so we have a GameCube set up in the classroom at school. On Friday, a few of my friends went to L.A. for a drama competition of some sort. They were taking SSBM, two controllers and the memory card we use, so I took it upon myself to bring in replacements. At the end of the day I brought my Melee disc and one of the two controllers (the other, 3rd-party and trashy, I'm leaving there) home, but after bowling I let Graydon borrow the good controller because one of his has a stuck A button.
This morning I predicted that Austin would forget to bring the game disc, Trevor would either not show up with or forget to bring the controllers and memory card, but Graydon would bring my controller.
And I was flawlessly right! We used my game disc and memory card again, and at break we had the fourth controller needed. Now I hope my prediction that more people will want to play Mario Kart than Naruto tomorrow comes true... 9_9
Post by: Lizard Dude on October 30, 2007, 01:39:35 AM
Now let's go for one that's not scripted. :P
Better hurry too, before Vid tells you to get more life.
Post by: Vidgmchtr on October 30, 2007, 04:13:39 PM
Post by: Toad on November 02, 2007, 07:29:34 PM
I was working in the drive thru (order taker) when a man comes through and has a question about coupons. He made me think of a certain video game character (you'll hopefully see why). The conversation went thusly..
Me: Can I take your order?
Him: Uh yea, I have a question about these coupons..
Me: Ok..
Him: It says on here that it's limit one per customer per visit. Is that true?
Me: Yes sir. I'm sorry but it is.
Him: *it sounds like he's turned away from the speaker and is talking to his lady friend* We can only use one per visit? Well..
*she says something to him*
Him: *he's turning back towards the speaker* Well, boo! Boo on that! Ok, I guess I'll have..
It took all I could not to laugh throughout the rest of his order. All of my coworkers who had been listening were laughing as well. Then I kept laughing the rest of the day, and the girl working drive thru with me was asking "Are you still laughing at that?"
Post by: Suffix on November 12, 2007, 01:42:35 AM
3 METER DASH
I've mentioned this before, but here's the real documentation. I had a dream a while back, and near the end of it, I became aware that I had to swallow to breathe. I swiftly woke up to find that the cold, dry air that had been invading had nearly killed my nose: a terrible nosebleed was taking place in the very back of it. Blinded by the early morning (somewhere around 10:00 AM) light, I fell out of bed, rushed out of my room, and ran into the bathroom... door. Squarely. One of my suitemates, who was in the bathroom, needlessly cursed and then let me in, where I spent an alarming amount of time (almost an hour) trying to both stop the bleeding and breathe.
Now my running into the door is famous! Whee.
Post by: MaxVance on November 12, 2007, 06:35:17 AM
Post by: Suffix on November 12, 2007, 01:23:14 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on November 12, 2007, 03:00:06 PM
Post by: Suffix on November 12, 2007, 03:12:08 PM
...the cold, dry air that had been invading had nearly killed my nose...
Post by: Vidgmchtr on December 01, 2007, 01:57:14 AM
So earlier tonight, after I got out of my shower, my cell phone rang.
I read the little screen, saying it was a "Private call". I thought "odd", and answered it. The following dialogue ensued:
"Hello?"
"Yes, is this [Vidgmchtr]?"
"...Yes?"
"Hi. do you live on [street]?"
"...Yes, why?"
"We have recently learned that there has been extra-terrestrial acitivity on your street."
"Really? Is that so?"
"Yes. We also have your name on our file. It claims that you yourself have come into contact with the extra-terrestrial life."
"...I have? That's...odd. I have not come into contact with any extra-terrestrial life, sir."
"...I think you're lying."
"..."
So he went on, saying that I have been contacting with said life. At first this seemed like an amusing prank, but it quickly got irritating:
"Is this a joke, sir?"
"No. you might think this might be a 'prank call' as you children today call it, but this is serious."
"...Is that so. Sir, your voice sounds familiar." (It did. I know I've heard it somewhere before.)
"I can assure you that we have not talked until this call."
"...Sir, can I hang up now?"
"NO. If you hang up, it will be a federal offense, and we will visit you in the morning."
"...I really think this is a joke."
"*stifled chuckling* Michael, this says extra-terrestrial life has been found on your street and that you yourself has come into contact with them."
"...Sir, I'm hanging up now. *closes the phone*"
The fact that the guy didn't sound serious at all, plus the fact that he was quietly laughing to myself (I believe I also heard another laughing voice at the other end) quickly told me that this was a prank call. I turned the phone off so he wouldn't call back.
Later, out of curiosity, I turned the phone on again. It said I had a new voicemail. I listened to it:
"Hello, Michael. I am calling back to tell you that you have committed a federal offense and that we will be visiting your street in the morning. Goodbye."
It DOES seem like a prank, but I can't shake the feeling that I will wake up to some creepy dude attempting to arrest me in the morning.
Post by: Lizard Dude on December 01, 2007, 05:56:01 AM
Post by: TEM on December 01, 2007, 11:06:15 AM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on December 01, 2007, 01:16:02 PM
After hearing that message, I tried showing it to my parents, though they were getting ready for bed. Mom just told me to turn the phone off again, and dad didn't seem to be listening, as he was still in the character of Ebenezer Scrooge (he's playing the character in our town's Charles Dickens festival). So I turned the phone off, and went to bed myself.
I woke up in the morning, to the sound of our Christmas tree falling down. My mother was struggling to get it back up. I closed the door to my room, and went back to sleep.
At around 11:55 (still the morning, obviously), I was still in bed, and heard the doorbell ring. This gave me a massive panic attack. After a minute or so of silence, they knocked on the door. I'm still wondering if it was said creepy dude who called last night. They left, and the phone rang. After 4 rings, it went to the answering machine. A guy with a similar voice left a message saying that because no one answered the door, we must reschedule to a later date when we want to change our phone number to our digital line.
Turned out the cable company rang the doorbell.
Post by: Glorb on December 01, 2007, 01:39:27 PM
So there I was, last night, sleeping on the couch in our living room. Now, I'm not afraid of the dark, but I was unable to sleep for several reasons:
1) Where I was facing, I could see three spooky things: A bag of cat food on the counter that looked like a severed head (which I moved), my lamp that looked like a tall, skinny guy standing there watching me, and a window with a branch moving by it every now and then.
2) My cat was apparently also suffering from insomnia, since she was running all over the place silently. I freaked out on four seperate occasions because I saw her in the corner of my eye.
3) My front door has a big window on it, and I had this lingering feeling someone was watching me with binoculars through it. Furthermore, because of the fancy design on it and the tree in our front lawn, it looks like a big face at nighttime. At first it looked like Strong Bad a little bit (which wasn't actually all that comforting), but when it got windier it looked like a big, sneering, twitching, wrinkly, demonic-looking face.
But the piece de resistance (or whatever) was when I saw a guy walk up to the front door, wearing a pale, Micheal Myers-y mask that seemed to be stretched around the edges. I am 80% sure it was a dream due to the fact that nothing happened after that, but I am still reluctant to sleep in the living room again (for all I know, that guy could walk up to our front door every night and just look inside the house).
Post by: Corleone on December 01, 2007, 02:01:04 PM
Post by: Sapphira on December 01, 2007, 05:11:53 PM
I woke up in the morning, to the sound of our Christmas tree falling down. My mother was struggling to get it back up. I closed the door to my room, and went back to sleep.You mean you didn't even offer to help her? Wow. >:P
Post by: Vidgmchtr on December 01, 2007, 06:11:07 PM
Post by: Corleone on December 01, 2007, 06:32:15 PM
Post by: BP on December 02, 2007, 02:35:55 AM
My friend Graydon (also departed FF member G-Dawg, if you remember him) has been saving for a Wii for a while, and the last thing he needed to do was sell his GameCube. He first offered it to one of my other friends (who incidentally is also named Sam), who has no game systems. Greedy as I am, I wanted it to replace my broken GameCube, to use with the GC screen that's finally been shipped to my house, and because I miss my GameBoy Player.
Today was all-AFK-day for me, and the two were over at my place for a politics project. We kind of battled it out and Graydon decided to sell the GameCube to not-me-Sam, because I already have a bunch of consoles and stuff. I have a Wii, which plays GC games.
After they left and six o'clock came, I had to go to sit for a nice family we know. I knew that Alex has a GameCube, but not Super Smash Bros. Melee. I brought the game, my memory card, and a third controller over. Alex played the 'Cube pretty much the whole six hours on a smaller screen while Abby idled and watched a movie--an incredible instance of an argument-free session. Lovely.
When we reached my house, their father and I had just engaged in a gaming conversation (everything gaming, Nintendo, Sony, Microsoft, and PC games... I knew what to say mostly for the first category, of course). By this time I had resolved to not be so selfish and get my old GameCube repaired, despite its junky appearance. Somehow or another, he mentioned that Alex mostly only plays the PS2 and that the GameCube almost never sees light, pretty much only when I am around. And that the Wii was a candidate for a Christmas present for Alex--I confrimed its goodness. So he offered to GIVE me the GameCube, no money involved. Thinking of how you don't miss your water till it's gone, I realized, of course! The Wii plays GameCube games.
No problems here at all. I get what I want (without paying!!!), Graydon sells his GameCube, Sam gets his GameCube, Alex and Abby won't ever miss their GameCube, just, wow. I'm sizing up all the possible situations that would not have resulted in this conclusion--Jack could have had more to drink at whatever party and been unfit to drive me home. We could have stayed on the topic of the strange goat-like creature that crossed the road before us too long. I could have not decided to bring Super Smash Bros. Melee at all, and the GameCube wouldn't have come up in conversation.
Now... what do I do with the old one?
Post by: CoconutMikeNIke on December 02, 2007, 12:58:11 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on December 02, 2007, 01:19:21 PM
Post by: MaxVance on December 02, 2007, 01:29:28 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on December 02, 2007, 01:30:33 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on December 02, 2007, 07:23:48 PM
Post by: goodie on December 29, 2007, 04:48:57 PM
Last night, at about 8PM, I was sitting in my living room watching TV. Suddenly, some guy outside starts shouting "HALLELUJAH!, HALLELUJAH!" He kept shouting it over and over for at least 5 minutes. Then finally he stopped.
But then, a few minutes later, someone in a nearby apartment (probably the same guy) turns up their stereo super loud. It was so loud the walls were shaking, and I could easily hear the song playing. It was a country song, and the lyrics were mostly "hallelujah" over and over. Finally, the song ended, and I thought I could have some peace and quiet. But a couple minutes later, they turn their stereo back up, and the same song plays again. After that it stopped for a minute, then they played some other country song. I was getting annoyed by now, so I pounded on the wall a couple times, hoping they would turn it down. But they didn't.
After several minutes, it finally stopped.
Post by: Corleone on December 29, 2007, 05:13:12 PM
Post by: goodie on December 29, 2007, 05:20:44 PM
Post by: Corleone on December 29, 2007, 05:27:22 PM
"To the idiot who was playing loud country music:
SHUT UP"
Post by: goodie on December 29, 2007, 07:52:41 PM
Post by: Suffix on January 05, 2008, 10:40:55 PM
ELEVATOR: CONTENTS UNDER IMAGINARY PRESSURE
In the Honors Hall, the elevator goes from the basement up to the fourth floor, but everything above the first floor requires you to swipe your ID card. Like most elevators, once you start going up, you have to reach the destination in order to go back down. I understand this fact very well, but for some reason it took this event in order for me to realize an important fact. I'll get to my realization in a moment.
I had just entered the elevator from the basement, having deposited a load of laundry in the dryer. Card swiped, I was ready to go back to the third floor, when I realized that I had planned to visit the vending machine! The door closed at that moment, and I almost panicked. Would I have to go all the way up the third floor, only to go back down?! And then came my glorious realization: I could press 1 without swiping my card! I was saved!
Similar to my accident at the "green bus stop," I started laughing maniacally, and loudly. I continued to laugh until the doors opened on the first floor, revealing a very concerned looking couple.
Yet again, my rare tendency to laugh maniacally under pressure (or, perhaps, when pressure is relieved suddenly) puts me in a strange light.
Post by: Vidgmchtr on January 05, 2008, 11:40:53 PM
Post by: Mr. Melee on January 18, 2008, 07:19:47 PM
So, my "friend" (I kind of don't want to be friends with him anymore), his friend, and I all go to Blockbuster to rent some games for the 360. We're looking for Halo 3, and we don't see any copies. So, I get commanded to go up front and ask if there are any copies left.
"Hi, do you have any copies of Halo 3 left?"
"Hang on, let me check."
...
"Ok, for what system?"
"Umm, 360?"
"Alright."
Seriously, what did she expect me to say, Dreamcast? It amazes me there are people that do not know what console Halo 3 is made for. And she was even a kind of young woman. Maybe I am overreacting a bit, but with the huge fanbase of Halo 3, it seems like a law that everyone would know what console it is for. Anyways, thankfully they did have a copy, and there was much rejoicing that night as we created the gametype "trogdor" and map "weeeeew."
Post by: Lizard Dude on January 18, 2008, 08:02:54 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on January 18, 2008, 08:12:28 PM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on January 19, 2008, 01:28:31 AM
Post by: Glorb on January 19, 2008, 10:06:08 AM
Post by: CrossEyed7 on January 20, 2008, 02:54:29 PM
Roommate: Oh, you have a Wii?
Me: Yeah.
Roommate: What games you got for it?
Me: Galaxy, Twilight Princess, Super Paper, Elebits, Excite Truck, and a bunch of Gamecube games.
Roommate: Do you have Melee?
Me: Yeah.
Roommate: Melee's awesome. I'll take you in that any day. I'll totally kick your [donkey].
Me: Well, I only brought one controller with me from home.
Roommate: Oh.
Me: ... Brawl looks really good.
Roommate: I hope that game sucks.
Me: ... Wait, what?
Roommate: Smash isn't a real fighting game.
Me: Why not?
Roommate: It's in 3D.
Me: ... No it's not.
Roommate: Well, you know what I mean.
Me: ...
Roommate: I mean, I know it's in 2D, but still, it's, like, not flat. Mario's, like... you know.
Me: Right.
Roommate: Smash is kiddy. I play real fighting games. And RPGs.
Me: Oh. Ever play Chrono Trigger?
Roommate: That game's [dukar].
Me: *shocked expression*
Roommate: I don't wanna offend you or anything, but it was [poo-poo]. Final Fantasy is way better.
Me: So I guess you didn't get all 14 endings.
Roommate: Actually, I did.
Me: So you hated it, and yet you played it long enough to get all 14 endings?
Roommate: I was bored.
Me: ... I like Paper Mario.
Roommate: Yeah, I liked the second one. The first one was boring. It was just, like, Mario looks at a bubble and thinks about what he's gonna do and you get people like Lakilester... and that's all it is.
Me: ... Huh?
Roommate: You know.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on January 20, 2008, 03:28:06 PM
How come he says he likes Melee and then disses the whole series?
Post by: CrossEyed7 on January 20, 2008, 06:19:00 PM
Post by: BP on January 31, 2008, 06:06:35 PM
Not amusing when they flood in.
Eventually it began to get out of hand. It was hard to move, hard to see, idiots claiming "I was here before you," et cetera. I suggested we make it "Bring your own controller" to help solve it, but that didn't end up happening. So, I bought myself a used GameCube on eBay for $58 (with a bunch of other stuff, it was an excellent deal). I would use the neat screen I've got for it and make it STRICTLY bring-your-own-controller. My friends and I would escape to it. The day I brought it...
"Welcome back, Mr. Thomas!"
:[ ]
Well, I don't regret it. Today we enjoyed only SIX people total at the GameCube, sitting down a good distance away, at a reasonable volume. And to top that off, they were all people I actually know. So I guess I'll get my Gamecube home tomorrow...
Post by: Vidgmchtr on March 11, 2008, 12:31:07 AM
I was sitting at the TV in the living room, watching Back to the Future Part II with a bag of clothes and other things, and my pillow, with my mother. The doorbell rang. Jeff, a friend of mine who lives in Brooklyn was at the door, ready to take me to the midnight launch of Super Smash Bros. Brawl in Manhattan.
We hop in his car, and head out for the city. We made a quick pit stop for gas, as well as food. We went to Wendy's and had eaten dinner there.
The ride took awhile. We departed around 4:30, so by the time we entered Queens and Brooklyn, the sun was already setting, and when we got out of the car to get into his apartment to drop off my stuff, it was dark out.
It was also raining on and off, so when we got to the subway station, we were soaked. We took the R train from his apartment in Bay Ridge in Brooklyn to Prince Street in Manhattan. The ride took awhile (About 12-13 stops, an ~18-20 minute ride) so we dried off, and waited. When we got to that stop, we headed out of the station, asked for directions to the Best Buy, and headed there.
We entered the building, and saw flashing lights in an area, we immediately went over it and saw this:
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv355%2FVidgmchtr%2FBestBuyCage.jpg&hash=4e5326f67a453725e43b9cdc7a2ddb63)
5 wide screen televisions on a balcony, showing a Brawl fight that was occuring downstairs. A guard in a suit was barring access to the staircase, so we just watched. We also wondered where the line for the game was, so I asked the guard and he said a line won't form until a few minutes before release. There were a couple of DJs announcing the fight down there, one male, and one female. It was an ongoing tournament that also had rounds in LA, San Fran, and Boston.
The male announcer periodically went upstairs and asked trivia questions for prizes such as Nintendo-related clothes, Wii games, and Wiis. I knew the answers to almost every question, but never got their attention to answer them. =/
He also said from down there, we could "Head upstairs and pre-purchase a copy of Super Smash Bros. Brawl so you won't have to wait in line". Jeff and I took the escalator upstairs and asked a staff member, who told us that they weren't reserving copies anymore. We got back downstairs we felt like the staff was lying, since the announcers were still claiming we could.
So we waited awhile again. Finally, I put two and two together and realized that the floor Jeff and I were on WAS the "upstairs" they were referring to. I walked up to the staff and asked if the staff members who told us we couldn't pre-purchase were wrong. He went on a nearby computer to check, and took me to a section of registers that had staff taking money and giving receipts for a copy of the game.
I called over to Jeff so he and I could pre-purchase. Now feeling good about myself for asking about it and being able to guarantee myself a copy, I enjoyed the rest of the tournament. When the New York contestants were finally whittled down to one last player, the three winners from LA, San Fran, and Boston came in and, with the New York winner, did four rounds of Brawl. Eventually the LA and San Fran players were eliminated, and the Boston player won, much to the dismay of the tons of New Yorkers surrounding him.
After that, they led us out of the building and into a line on the sidewalk in the back of the store. Jeff and I waited in the dark Manhattan streets by playing Mario Kart DS together, and socializing with the two people behind us. The line moved every so often, and two staff members in front of the line took pictures of people waiting to get their copy of the game at midnight. We didn't wait very long, thankfully. It appeared that mostly everyone decided to pre-purchase a copy. We finally got in at midnight, presented our receipts, and got ourselves Brawl.
We took the subway back, went back to his apartment, and played for a couple of hours. Then, I went to sleep on his couch for the night. When I woke up, it was about 9:30, so I waited on the couch for Jeff to wake up (wasn't a long wait) and make us breakfast. After that, I had changed into my other clothes, and we played Brawl until about 2. After all the craziness, he took me back home. I got back at around 4~4:30, so I had been away from home for just about one whole day. =3
Fun weekend, this was.
Post by: CrossEyed7 on March 11, 2008, 10:01:41 AM
Roommate: So, how was Brawl?
Me: Good!
Roommate: No, like, how good?
Me: (in Cheerleader's voice) So good!
Roommate: Who says that?
Me: Cheerleader.
Roommate: Sweet, there are cheerleaders in Brawl?
Me: No, Teen Girl Squad.
Roommate: What's that from?
Me: Strong Bad.
Roommate: What's that from?
Me: Homestar.
Roommate: Homestar? ... Like... Homestar Runner?
Me: Yeah.
Roommate: Like homestarrunner.com?
Me: Yeah.
Roommate: You know, I've heard about that before. What is it, is it like a website?
Me: ... That is typically what the .com part references.
Roommate: Oh.
Incidentally, he's graduating from college at the end of this semester. Seriously, how do you go through college without ever seeing h*r? Maybe he actually does homework instead of watching cartoons all day
Post by: Vidgmchtr on March 11, 2008, 02:20:30 PM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on March 11, 2008, 04:23:10 PM
Post by: BriGuy92 on March 11, 2008, 04:33:06 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on March 11, 2008, 06:55:23 PM
I stopped paying attention to Vidgmchtr when I realized he had no sense of humor.I stopped paying attention to Chup when I realized he always had something to say about me that he didn't like.
Post by: PaperLuigi on March 11, 2008, 07:04:25 PM
Post by: BP on March 11, 2008, 07:13:57 PM
Post by: PaperLuigi on March 11, 2008, 07:50:16 PM
Post by: Kuromatsu on March 11, 2008, 07:51:54 PM
On the other hand, theres times on Homestar-Runner when things are funny, but theres other times when things are just plain dumb.
Post by: AbercrombieBaseball on March 14, 2008, 10:24:43 PM
Me: Man, I think I've lost my stroke (just threw my third gutterball of the game)
Buddy 1: Dude, don't throw gutterballs just to make us feel good (they had thrown more than me at that time)
Me: Nah, I think that was my wrist
(next time up, I throw two gutterballs)
Me: I swear, it's the Wii that's causing me to throw poorly
Buddy 2: Yeah, Wii bowling will do that to you
Me: My stroke is too Wiiified
Buddy 2: I can tell since you aren't getting the ball down low enough
Buddy 1: The bowling ball is not your half pound Wiimote
Me: Yeah, that last swing would have been at least a three on a Wii
(next time up, I get the ball down and wind up getting 8 pins)
Anyone else ever have this happen to them if they haven't done real bowling in a while and have played a lot of Wii Sports?
Post by: Vidgmchtr on March 14, 2008, 10:45:51 PM
And I'm still repulsed by that alley, I remember going there for my birthday once, throwing a ball that didn't have the momentum to get all the way to the pins (it actually didn't get too far at all, I sort of tripped as I was about to throw). Because there were no staff to help out, I walked up to it in the lane, took it back, and threw again (gutter ball, IIRC), and shortly afterward, a short, nasty old woman who worked there started to yell at me for walking into the lane.
Also, I'm not too good, sometimes I'll fluke and throw a strike, but most of the time I only hit one or two pins a throw.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on March 15, 2008, 12:35:13 AM
Post by: Kuromatsu on March 15, 2008, 12:01:01 PM
Post by: Jman on March 15, 2008, 12:13:35 PM
Post by: Vidgmchtr on March 15, 2008, 12:15:27 PM
Doesn't mean I'm a pro at regular bowling one bit.
Post by: SushieBoy on March 15, 2008, 09:45:39 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on March 16, 2008, 01:07:31 AM
Post by: Jman on March 16, 2008, 09:10:22 AM
Post by: SushieBoy on March 16, 2008, 04:20:03 PM
Post by: Kuromatsu on March 16, 2008, 07:13:22 PM
Post by: Captain Jim on March 16, 2008, 08:50:30 PM
Post by: Toad on April 10, 2008, 11:58:45 AM
We were playing Mario Party 5 one time, and one of us got up to put some food in the microwave, which was in the next room over. Meanwhile, his character in MP5 was still moving around the board, and landed on a Tweester space. One of us picked up his controller to move the game along, and right about the time Tweester was done moving the Star, the microwave went off (it was a very loud Ding!)
We all strated laughing, and after my friend came back in the room, we told him what had happened. All he could say was Ding, your Star is ready! It still cracks us up to this day.
Another time, the same friend from above and another were playing Melee. One of them was playing as DK. Often times in games, when I get hit, I say things like ouch, aagghh, or monkies, and then I also happen to comment about what's happening on the stage/level (there are Bob-ombs here!) Well, DK hit me, and I said something about it, while at the same time noticing that two Party Balls full of food had burst open, so I said something like this..
Monkies! They're everywhere!
My two friends started laughing, and the one that was DK said Monkies are everywhere?
I have a bunch of stories, but it's about to storm just now, so I should probably leave.. but I'll be back.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 10, 2008, 09:26:36 PM
Post by: SolidShroom on April 10, 2008, 10:24:57 PM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 10, 2008, 11:11:39 PM
Post by: Lizard Dude on April 10, 2008, 11:20:40 PM
>:)
-LD
Post by: Vidgmchtr on April 11, 2008, 12:51:14 AM
Post by: Toad on April 12, 2008, 02:56:02 PM
Post by: Super Caterina! on April 12, 2008, 03:23:00 PM
I remember that when I was grapeharvesting last summer the days were very hot and I had to work for full days with 1 hour free for lunch break....T.T I'm not complaining, but I want only to tell that these 2 things (hot days and many hours working non.stop) mad eme really crazy! XD In fact, when I was grapeharvesting, a little grape fell down near my feet and, when it touched the ground, I could see something like circle waves. Just like when you throw a stone on the water-the same thing! XD But thestrange thing was that there was no water, only high grass! XDD In only 3 week I lost 6 kilos then!:D And then, after having worked for so many hours, I had to go to driving lessons.... ^_^''''
The result was that I was very tired and so I saw things that normally doesn't exist in the reality (XD). This summer I'll return to work as grapeharvester, by the way, because I liked the company!^^ And then I will surely be ready psicologically! XD
Post by: CrossEyed7 on April 12, 2008, 11:34:21 PM
So I spectated a Brawl match today where it got to Sudden Death. I think it was down to Ness and Snake. Ness was using his Down B and recovering damage every time Snake hit him. Got down to 84%. Then as soon as he let go, Snake KO'd him anyway. I lol'd.
Wish my internet was fast enough for me to play, though. Lag is insane. The farthest I've gotten in a match before losing the connection was 32 hundredths of a second. And that took at least a minute and a half.
Post by: CrossEyed7 on July 27, 2008, 10:41:27 AM
It was probably from that big fly I killed this morning.
Also, I was at Wal Mart the other day, and saw a playset of one of those walker tanks from Star Wars (Not the AT-ATs, but something similar). I wondered out loud "What's the advantage to having legs instead of wheels?" Then a guy drove by on an electric wheelchair.
Post by: BP on September 27, 2008, 03:12:02 AM
My sunglassed eyes locked with his black insectoid eyes. It was such a strange sensation. I've never felt this way before. It was like the mantis wanted me to know something but wouldn't say. Or maybe he just thought my sunglasses made me look like a huge mantis. I passed him over to Captain Jim and the mantis perched on his shoulder, unmoving.
So apparently the mantis spent the next hour in a jar (one with a purpose that's not important to the story) until he looked at the Captain as if to say "May I go now?" So he was released. I hope he's okay now--there are some stupid people in the world who live to destroy. Me, I like some insects--not like flies, mosquitoes, or gnats. Crickets and mantises are cool--they just look nice and mind their own business, peacefully. Not like spiders.
Coincidentally, not a week before, a mantis flew into the kitchen. My mom had dismissed it as a moth when it did. I let it go but I'm afraid one of the dogs damaged its wing. We didn't make eye contact like the mantis from yesterday though.
If you must know about the jar, we decided to make the upcoming Brawl tournament more interesting, so all participants contribute two dollars. We want sixteen entrants to not only make the brackets perfectly even, but to make an even thirty-dollar prize for the victor. I really don't know if Ness is my best for an item-free environment, so I'm going to use Pikachu. I wish the mantis could enter.
Post by: SolidShroom on September 27, 2008, 06:14:52 AM
Post by: Glorb on September 27, 2008, 09:26:19 AM
Post by: CrossEyed7 on September 27, 2008, 12:54:04 PM
Post by: BP on May 21, 2009, 09:22:10 PM
We kept going and I saw a purple iPod Nano on the ground, wrapped in the earbuds. It didn't register, "Hey, a valuable electronic item!" until about two steps past it.
"Whoa-whoa-whao, an iPod!" Other Sam picks it up and looks it over. Eight gigabytes. It still works. Finders keepers, right? I tell him I just want the earbuds, I need new ones.
It hits us at the same time.
"Yyyyeah, no, let's take this to the office."
And we did. It felt good.
Later I took a lemon out of the fridge for my iced tea.
"Man. This is a fat lemon."
Of course, my fingertips are a mess and around my nails are many nicks that I can't help but bite... that lemon exacted its punishment.
Post by: BP on March 06, 2011, 01:40:54 AM
I was on my way from the A&W to Save Mart (and giving my friend a ride home in the process). I pulled into a left turn lane and, making a turn from where I was headed to where I had been goes this car.
You know that flashy, gaudy adhesive paper used as textbook covers by middle school girls?
This car's body was like that. Purple. Purple
It was all over the zone between ghetto and pimp, kicking at the boundaries
Post by: CrossEyed7 on March 06, 2011, 01:53:05 AM
Post by: PaperLuigi on March 06, 2011, 02:06:15 AM
Post by: Weegee on March 06, 2011, 02:55:29 AM
Post by: PaperLuigi on March 06, 2011, 05:19:06 AM
Post by: Toad on March 08, 2011, 12:30:22 AM
(Thank you, whichever mod did that!)
Post by: Turtlekid1 on March 09, 2011, 04:00:53 PM
Post by: CrossEyed7 on March 09, 2011, 07:22:57 PM
Post by: BP on March 30, 2011, 07:17:48 PM
Nah not really. But it could have. I was on my way from the 99¢ store to the courthouse--the trial broke before lunch, but my friend has an internship there so I returned way before lunch intending to play my DS until lunch happened.
AND THEN MY CAR BURST INTO FLAMES
Well more like smoke billowed out of the back seat, I freaked out and parked and called my dad (because for some reason my brain thinks that he is the hero to ask first, rather than Triple-A
Turns out there were really really old cables connecting from my radio to absolutely nothing inside the trunk. Must have been a stereo or something in there before the previous owner sold the car. They were shorting out and melting into the floor.
Post by: Lizard Dude on May 31, 2011, 12:11:02 AM
Then I killed the spider.
The adjective for this story was "murderous".
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 30, 2011, 02:43:19 AM
But this is not how I experienced the storm.
I had the morning off because I was working late for the Madden 12 midnight release. My sister (who I live with) left for her first day of grad school and I played some 360, listened to a podcast, read some stuff. About an hour before I had to leave to work, I went upstairs to take a shower. The sky out the window was peaceful and there was no wind.
I started to shower and after a bit I started to notice a roaring noise louder than the shower itself. It sounded like Thor himself was attacking my house with torrential rain, booms of thunder, and percussive hail beats. In the small windowless bathroom, however, I was cut off from actually knowing what was going on. Had Irene crossed the continent or something?
I quickly finished showering and opened the bathroom door. Directly down the stairs from my bathroom is my front door and kitchen with a window. Oddly, I didn't hear any rain or wind anymore and it looked like sunlight from the window was hitting the bottom of the stairs. Thinking "wait, then what was all that noise?" I ran downstairs without putting any clothes on and looked out the window. The ground was littered with tree branches, melting hailstones, and wetness. I turn to go back upstairs and just at that moment my drenched sister busts in the front door to see me standing BUTT ASS NAKED in the kitchen.
It took some convincing but I think I finally got her to believe I don't do horrible things in the kitchen involving marmalade while she's out. The greatest arguments on my side were the fact that I was wet and the fact that I was flaccid.
The adjective for this story was "naked".
Post by: bobman37 on August 30, 2011, 05:49:50 PM
Post by: Weegee on August 30, 2011, 10:28:49 PM
Post by: TEM on September 02, 2011, 06:52:21 PM
Post by: PaperLuigi on September 03, 2011, 12:19:15 AM
Post by: Ultima Shadow on September 04, 2011, 05:07:15 AM
Post by: BP on April 10, 2013, 10:05:01 AM
So I'm coming back from town yesterday and I'm at a light turning left. There's one car in front of me and a truck behind me. The light turns green and the car in front of me goes, and I follow at a generous distance, and the truck behind me lets out a honk.
"Oh, what the ****? I'm not taking that long, where in the hell do you have to be so bad that me taking a second to go makes you lose your [dukar]? You crazy *******..." I watched to see how close the truck would follow me or if any other crazy *******ry would be displayed, but nothing notable happened and I lost it at a four-way stop.
Until it pulled into my driveway a minute after I did. It was my dad.