Steve Malpass? Isn't he Slippy? Either way, he's not American.
And Krystal sounds Puerto Rican to me. Oh well.
(Interesting note: In Banjo-Tooie, the androgenous Merry Maggie Malpass [the gay frog's co-worker] was named after Steve.)
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Weekly Frostbite Quote #7:
"Darkness comes over the land,
The Night grabs us with its cold, sticky hand.
We beg the Night to let us go,
But it grabs us tighter, saying, `No.`
Then it stabs us in the head.
Because of Daylight Saving Time, we now are dead."