Fungi Forums
Miscellaneous => Forum Games => Topic started by: CharginChuck on December 10, 2005, 08:27:46 PM
-
Many of you may remember the old Mario Story... while not as legendary as Chocobo's Mario Word Association or Mario Bar, it still had a place in everyone's heart... or at least mine anyways.
Here goes:
Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad went out for a walk.
-
"Look" said Toad, "A Chain Chomp!"
:)
-
"Look!" said Mario. "I'ma gonna kill you for-a saying that to much-a!"
-
"There doesn't even appear to be a Chain Chomp in the vicinity!" added Luigi dryly.
-
Mario then pulled down his pants and farted a mighty fart, for no reason at all.
-
Toad exploded for no apparent reason.
-
Then everyone started playing SMB
-
MArio was donkey kong cause he knew it was the only person who can beat him, but luigi however was Himself and it came down to them 2
-
Mario/DK wins and goes to Rally's because he's gotta eat at Rally's.
-
Even though Rally's was never mentioned in the original, Mario had a strong sence of de ja vu, which was so strong that he vomited on his shoes, and died.
-
Then I took a Hammer and killed Glorb. ;D
-
Mario then thought, "What the heck does this have to do with me anyway?"
-
So, in confusion, he stumbled into Sony (shudders at the thought).
-
And he took everything and changed it to Nintendo.
-
Then, Sonic yelled out, "Look! A Chain Chomp!", farted a mighty fart, and caused the story to restart. :)
-
Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad (once again) went out for a walk.
-
Then, a crazed writer was fired from Nintendo for trying to cross over Mario with Little House on the prairie AND the Waltons.
-
The crazed writer turned onto whoever Sony's president is.
-
Then, suddenly, the story paused because the author had to take a phone call.
-
But, he didn't deposit 25c.
-
Mario then beat up the phone with his hammer.
-
The story continues w/ the story writer coming up w/ an evil plan.
-
The evil plan is destroyed by Wario in his purple ' 50s style car.
-
Suddenly, the car turned black and ate a passing chicken eating Koopa.
-
The car got indegestion and took some Pepto Bismol.
-
It was actually Chemical X and the car became the Fat Phimp Car
-
The new trend that [hopefuly] comes in the next decade crushes said car. This is getting ti be a lot like the rock-etc. thread.
-
Suddenly, Crazy Frog causes everyone to go insane, and meanwhile, Peach eats Toadsworth.
-
Peach has become Luigi all over again.
-
Mario's like WTD?
-
Peach eats Mario, who wakes up in his bed, realizing its all a dream.
-
Or IS It? Mua ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Bowser locked Mario in a room and forced him to watch every crappy show ever made.
-
Mario screemed: "No, not Hong Kong Phooey!"
-
Then Luigi Simpson came in and shamelessly advertised his thread, then rescued Mario from Hong Kong Phooey.
-
Bowser appeared, though, and wrecked the party.
-
Floorboards cracked and the roof was raised into the exosphere at Bowser's fury!
-
Whan Bowser crashed the party, he stole a star from everybody.
-
Then the Eternal Star yelled, "Look! A Chain Chomp!", pulled down it's pants, farted a mighty fart, exploded, then turned Waluigi into a pizza, to which Wario licked his lips and ate his brother.
-
Wario sarted going on an eating spree for the *insert ###########.........* time.
-
Then Wario noticed that instead of starting, he sarted, so that meant he turned into a clearing.
-
Then it happened...
-
Then Mario said "I am the terror that flaps in the night. I fix drains by day, and shoot fireballs at night. I am Mario Mario!"
-
"Too many sent.'s." said Mario.
-
Whoops.
-
"Hey-a, who said that-a?" Mario asked loudly.
-
A mysterious person garbed in a black cloak landed silently left to the red plumber's back, and tapped his right shoulder.
-
Then I, Fox McCloud, in a desperate attempt to revive this thread, restarted the story. Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad went for a walk.
-
Then, they found that the Mushroom Kingdom was in a sorry state because it was warped into that state from the events of The Revenge of Luigi.
-
"No! Viva ze' Mario Brothers!" Peach cried.
-
Suddenly a chain chomp appeared and devoured her in one mighty bite.
-
Mario said, "Eh, the heck with Peach," and walked away.
-
But the chain-chomp then throws her up, and she heard what you said, and hates you now. (Nice going.)
-
Peach, then had mario thrown in jail for 10 years.
-
A tear rolled down the plumber's bruised cheek.
-
Mario secretly asks Luigi (somehow) to break him out.
-
However, Wario did the "breaking in" when he thought the jailhouse was a doughnut shop.
-
"That was fast," Mario said, thinking it was Luigi.
-
Wario thought that Mario was a jelly-filled doughnut and ate Mario, and at that time Luigi got there.
-
Wario, who was having a heart attack after eating Mario (who was also high in suger, fat and calories) obviously needed a doctor quick, so Luigi traveled 100 miles to go get one.
-
but the only doctor there was doctor mario, so luigi slapped a red cap on his head, gave him some 'shrooms and left original mario, and wario to die
RIP Mario, fat, over rated pimpish plumber(who is still awesome)
Rip Wario, you are fat, greedy, fat and...fat.(fat ppl arent cool)
-
Fat PPL are cool. Just ask Lizard Dude!
-
AWWWW!!! CRAP!!! The story ended. Well someone's going to have to start a new one, and I don;t want to.
-
BUT I DO!!!!
-
Well then start, I love this game!
-
kk! Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad went for a walk.
-
Then Mario walked into an invisible wall.
-
Then it transformed into a Chain Chomp.
-
(Not this again) This time they were smart enough to knock it out, before anything happened.
-
Then, Mario pulled down his pants and... mooned Toadsworth, who fainted from shock.
-
Luigi covers Peach's eyes and tells her the sun was to bright and big, which they didn't realize the sun was getting bigger.
-
Mario scowled as he watched Duke lose to LSU in the NCAA tourney.
-
Then Toadsworth (even though I thought it was Toad), gains consciousness and yells that the sun is about to fry them all!
-
Mario, reacting quickly, reaches into his pocket and gets out some Sun-Screen : SPF 1,593,857.
-
The sunscreen actually turned out to be a mega level power-up item, and Mario went from Lv. 50 to Lv. 50,000!
-
But then he got a Game Over and realized he didn't save.
-
But thankfully Luigi saved on his file and opened it up again.
-
Luigi's computer used dial up, so the file took a painfully long time to load, and while everyone was watching the file load, Bowser came and took Peach to an uncharted island in the middle of the South Pacific.
-
Since you told us exactly where they went, the Mario gang found him, and they...
-
(Not a continue the sentence story.) Then the South Pacific exploded, and Peach died, while Bowser escaped.
-
Luigi, getting sick of the concept all the people close to him dieing, went on a flamimg rampage, which killed Bowser.
-
Then he killed himself for making more death.
-
So, everyone was dead, and due to the temporal casualty loop (which also appeared in the old mario story), the story started over.
-
OK Then. Ummm... Mario and Luigi were in a battle with every villain they have ever met, so they called for...
-
They called for all of the greatest Nintendo heroes ever and they called themselves the Nintendo All Stars.
-
Among them were Link, Kirby, Samus, Yoshi (more of a sidekick, but I love him), Fox, Falco, Marth, Roy, and Pikachu. (Pikachu is a very popular Nintendo character. You gotta have it)
-
(true) So, all of the people in the galaxy came to watch the dual of these champions with the evil villians.
-
It started with Bowser killing Pikachu, by taking his weak body and impaling it on his shell, and Ganondorf getting a 12-gauge and blowing everyone else (except for Link, Kirby, Fox and of course......Mario+Luigi) away! *huff, huff.....long sentence.*
-
Bowser saw Peach coming along, so he kidnapped her (AGAIN!!), and Ganondorf saw Zelda, so he kidnapped her.
-
They called in air-support and a bunch pidgits came and threw a bunch of bob-ombs.
-
Meanwhile, one of the fans caught all of this on tape, said "I could get rich!", and turned it into a video game that he called....Super Smash Bros Melee.
-
And he really did make MILLIONS!!!
-
So Mario was angry at the guy who had done this and ended up killing him, however the guy was actually Miyamoto, and Mario began to vanish, as well as Link and Luigi, while Kirby just stood there and laughed. (Another run on.)
-
So Kirby chased Bowser and Ganondorf to retrieve the captured.
-
But Bowser and Ganondorf vanished as well; so did the Princesses.
-
Kirby is the last one standing, so he is the victor. THE END
-
One day, Toad said "Look, a chain chomp," when it was actually a goomba.
-
All of a sudden, Toad sprouted a winged shell; Paramorphitis.
-
Then Luigi fainted from the sudden fiasco.
-
Then Mario started whacking a bird's head on a table trying to get it to wake up, only to realize that it was dead.
-
Then the bird woke up as Feathor, the undead bird menace!
-
Then Luigi decided to nickname Toad "Kinoko Noko" and laughed so hard he fainted again.
-
After Mario destroyed Feathor, (getting a black eye in the process) he jumped on Toad once, then (for no particular reason) the red plumber fainted beside his little brother.
-
Toad got angry and went into a fury and asked Fawful to get revenge for him.
-
Fawful refused, so Toad killed him with DUDE, the charity worker chainsaw.
-
DUDE was feeling evil today, so he used his......magic chainsaw powers........to bring Feathor and his brother PHEG back to life!
-
Then I thought of a hilarious bit that I could have written if not for the sentence limit.
-
Then Mario says "I think we could forgive Jman for the longer than 1 sentence statement, go ahead."
-
DUDE was feeling evil today, so he used his......magic chainsaw powers........to bring Feathor and his brother PHEG back to life!
It was PEHG - Peach's Evil Head Glass, not PHEG - Peach's Head Evil Glass.
Then Sonic the Hedgehog came.(He was on crack, as usual)
-
Then Luigi says "Can I have some, I don't feel good right now."
-
Sonic said "NO! IT'S MY CRACK!", so Luigi killed him and swiped his drugs.
-
Then he traded them to the villain they were fighting and so everything was at peace again.
-
The villian/drug lord hocked them for money to buy a bomb.
-
The bomb was a fake and so it did no damage to anyone (except for the Drug Lord lost his drugs).
-
A police investigation soon followed, the main question being "How did this fake bomb create the demise of the infamous Drug Lord?"
-
The story was told all over again, even though each character's side was different.
-
Only, the fake bomb never killed the Drug Lord; he just faked it and moved to some random place in the middle of nowhere where he could make drugs.
-
But Luigi, being angered that he was swindled, followed the Drug Lord.
-
PaperLuigi's spelling mistake of PEHG caused an angry mob to hunt him down, where, in the middle of the streets, he was tarred and feathered.
-
Which happened to start another Revolutionary War, besides the war that going on before.
-
A light sabre fight with Rev controllers.
-
Luke Skywalker came in and dominated everyone.
-
But then, Darth Vader came and said, "Luke, I am your father!"
-
Then Darth Vader had a heart attack and Luke didn't save him because he was to busy denying it.
-
"I have no son!" were Vader's last words.
-
Then Barty Crouch came and said "Hey, that's my line!" and killed Vader again.
-
Then Luke shouted "Who the crap is Barty Crouch!!!" and cut off the guy's head with his lightsaber.
-
The ghost of Vader ascended and said, "Too many of these sentences are starting with 'then'!"
-
Suddenly, Slade from Teen Titans came along and summoned an army of fiery demons, to which Luke and Barty Crouch ran away, barking like chickens. (o_0)
-
Even though Barty was dead he tripped and was killed again by the demons, and Luke hid in a rest-stop bathroom.
-
The evil Jedi assassinator Boba Fett crept around the rest stop saying "Come out come out wherever you are, Luke Skywalker!"
-
Boba blew up the restaurant, leaving Luke standing in a big crater.
-
Then Haan Solo and Chewbacca come in the Millenium Falcon and blast the crap out of Boba Fett, and save Luke.
-
Finally, Mario came along, and started hitting everyone with fireballs- except for Slade and the fire demons, who were invulnerable to fire. :D
-
Then the story turns back into a whole Mario Story, and Bowser had just taken Princess Daisy.
-
No no no. Dude677man got out his machine and got us back on track.
-
Then Bird Person miraculously appeared, and Daisy yelled "Wahoo!" until Bird Person grabbed a cape and hit her away with it.
-
Then Luigi came and said, "How could'a you?" and threw fireballs at Bird Person.
-
Then, out of nowhere, Michael Jackson and Tom Cruise appeared and screamed.
-
Then the aliens from Signs come and said "This looks like another Scary Movie."
-
Then the HAL9000 said "I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that."
-
Link appeared, but started to get chased by pt_peach.
-
Then, pt_peach catches Link and demands swordsmanship lessons from him.
-
Link was poofed away from pt_peach to an unknown place in Hyrule, and pt_peach was poofed to a different place in Hyrule.
-
And then G-Dawg said "I don't know that much about Zelda or wtvr."
-
Then -FoxMcCloud- handed G-Dawg a book titled "Zelda for people that don't know much about Zelda or wtvr" and Link got killed by Ganon.
-
pt_peach killed Ganon, and as the blood-stained princess kissed the dead hero, Link was rejuvenated
-
Then I died as a result of a bomb in the Mario Bar.
-
And no one cared.
-
Awwww Poor Jman.
-
Then pt_peach and Link set up a funeral for Jman.
-
Then they saw the price and said "Never mind."
-
Then Wario lended Link some money and said, "If I don't get this back in time, I'll kick your butt."
-
Link didn't get the money back in time, so Wario.....told Deezer to feed him some bread.
-
Hey Guys! Guess what I found!?
http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=4177.0 (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=4177.0)
-
Then Mario found himself being zapped from animated movie to animated movie, spending about a minute in each.
-
The first was a Cowboy and Indian scene, in the middle of a fierce battle.
-
It actually happened to be a scene from "Fievel Goes West."
-
Then Mario got squashed by a passing wagon.
-
Then he switched to a scene in "Aladdin."
-
After Abu beat the crap out of him, Mario was zapped to the animated chase sequence in "Monty Python and the Holy Grail."
-
Mario got everything on his body, except for his head, cut off, and claimed "It's just a flesh wound," and then was transported to a football field, and since he was only a head, he got to be the football.
-
And Peach was the cheerleader, but when seeing Mario's head, she fainted.
-
The scene then switched to a live action movie, as a change of pace.
-
Luigi was "Luigi Man" and his movie was called "Luigi Man with his kick butt monkey Abu visit the football game featuring the 'Amazing football head' who once drank from the Holy Grail in Monty Python."
-
Mario appeared and said "And now for something completely different."
-
And Peach got a nintendo ds and played a game.
-
The game was called "Super Princess Peach".
-
And Kojinka played M&L:SS till 3:30 am.
-
Sadly, outta nowhere, a man by the name of "Daremole" appeared and declared that Ds's are the work of evil and want to challenge anyone who opposes him.
-
But he was wrong; PSPs are the true work of evil.
-
Suddenly, a terrible war started, and the Nintendo DS's were losing to the shininess of the PSP- when, a new challenger came, and smited the PSP- none other than the Sega Game Gear, to which DS exclaimed "Game Gear? I thought you died!" and Game Gear replied "No, I'm just very hard to find... buy Sonic the Hedgehog!" to which Game Gear disappeared, leaving DS very confused.
-
And Ultima Shadow started trying to group long sentences together and therefore created a huge sentence fragment.
-
Then his English teacher scolded him for it until Ultima Shadow decided to hire someone to hit her with a leg of ham.
-
Then Godzilla was hoppin' around.
-
He smashed Peach, so DSs and the PSPs joined together to take him down.
-
These awesome game machines were called DSPs, and they completely destroyed every other console in the world, so Sontendy became the best game company in the world.
-
Then aliens came and abducted all of the supplies needed to make the DSPs,so they everyone went mad with rage.
-
Then pt_peach got mad and shot up the aliens (remembering her shotgun from the early days of the pointless topic).
-
But then yet another alien civilization took it again, and this time they're shotgun-proof.
-
Deezer started throwing bread at the aliens, and they retreated.
-
I got out my trusty Red Ryder BB gun and shot an alien.
Sontendy?! XD
-
Then The Chef arrived on the scene, took out his trusty SPATULA and proceded to fight the aliens
-
Mario stole Peach's frying pan, along with Chef's spatula to fry some mushrooms.
-
And made a mushroom pizza for the aliens, gave it to them and they went away.
-
But then The Chef asked for his SPATULA back, becuse it was a very sacred item.
-
Mario tossed the Holy Grail to The Chef, but King Arthur caught it first.
-
All of a sudden, the worlds became connected and the Heartless began to invade!!!111!!!!one!!
-
Then XD001 (Shadow Lugia) Shadow Blasted the Heartless till they were nothingness.
-
Mario started smacking the Heartless beings on their heads with Peach's frying pan.
-
But the Heartless began to multiply every second, so the only one who could stop them was the Keyblade Master.
-
But unfortunately the Keyblade Master was on his tea break and wouldn't help defeat the Heartless.
-
Since the Keyblade is the only thing that can destroy the Heartless, Mario tried as hard as he could to focus the power in his heart, so that the Keyblade may choose him instead.
-
But the Keyblade ignored him, choosing instead to roast some marshmallows by a camp fire.
-
Finally, the Keyblade chose three Nintendo superstars to save the world: Mario, Luigi, and Link.
-
So the Keyblade split itself into three Keyblades known as Power Star, Little Brother and Relic of Time.
-
Power Star had a ruby on the hilt, Little Brother was much like Power Star only an emerald was on its hilt, and the Relic of Time was a Master Sword with a green hilt.
-
So the three heroes set out to save all the worlds of Nintendo ontheir new Tetrimino Ship, which was created by Professor Hector. "Wait a minute!!" cried The Chef, "Where the heck is my SPATULA!?"
-
Then Spongebob came out of nowhere and said "I have it to make my Krabby Patties so you can't have it!" and took off.
-
Then Mr Krabbs smacked Spongebob and said "Get back to work your loseing me money!"
-
Link was about to grab for the Master Sword, but the scabard was empty, then he heard a mysterious voice say, "I am the essance of the Keyblade, Hero of Time. Knowing you already had an evil-banishing blade, I fused my power with the power of the Master Sword when I split into three. I thought I would save you the hassle of carrying two swords."
-
And I said, "I'll carry the other sword for him!" and took it from mysterious voice.
-
"No. The Master Sword and I are one," the mysterious voice (the essance of the Keyblade) said.
-
After getting the SPATULA back,The Chef said, "I had no idea that the Keyblade could talk."
-
Mr. Krabbs got angry at The Chef for taking the SPATULA and got a criminal to try to assassinate him.
-
But Mario somehow found out (We dont know how)and he killed the assassin just in time.
-
And then somehow, everything went back in time, and the assasin killed Mario, leaving Link to fend for himself.
-
Link went into a frenzy because he was confused and he ran into a wall.
-
The Chef, realizing that the fate of the world was at stake, used his SPATULA's "Hidden Power", which was the only thing that could remove all the non-Nintendo characters from the story.........
......so the story restarted from the point where Mario, Luigi and Link were about to set off to save all the worlds of Nintendo using their new Keyblades.
-
I came to the scene and said "What the heck is a Keyblade?"
-
Then, a large roaring monster appeared, roaring and large!
-
But the monster noticed it was tea time and left they place.
-
The monster sat down, eagerly awaiting his evening meal, until he realised it was... steamed spinach, and he roared, smashing everything!
-
Mario knowing that there was no other way, he jumped on the monsters head leaving it unconscience
-
Link thrusted his sword into the monster's chest, as to make sure the monster would never cause trouble again.
-
Soon, everyone started to sit down for tea. Including the monster and the whole cast of the Simpsons.
-
"But How? I just killed the monster!" gasped Link.
-
It wasn't the monster, but it's nice twin that turns evil at the sight of a full moon.
-
Meanwhile Bart Simpson is destroying the moon, so a full moon will never happen again, leaving the monster nice for ever.
-
"I thought Master Roshi from the Dragonball anime destroyed the moon, so young Goku would not turn into the giant monkey monster again," said Luigi.
-
Mario then explained how Dragon Ball Z didn't exist, but Luigi didn't believe him.
-
"We don't really exist either," Link said, and then Mario yelled, "You idiot! Now we're disappearing into thin air!" and so the Keyblade picking the three Nintendo superstars thing happened again.
-
Then opaque toad said "Look! a chain chomp!!"
-
Then the Chef shouted, "Thats it!! I'm gonna go save the worlds myself!!!" and stormed off to the Tetrimino Ship.
-
But the chef didnt listen to opaque toads warning about an aproaching opaque Chain Chomp, so the opaque chain chomp ramed right into the chef.
-
Jman accidentally ripped a hole in the dimension and found his way into the story.
-
Then the opaque chain chomp pushed both jman and the chef into the dimensionhole.
-
Bah, I sock the chain chomp with my trusty sledgehammer and pull me and Th Chef out of the dimensionhole.
-
"Now what do we do?" askes jman.
-
"We save the Nintendo characters from vanishing into thin air of course." said The Chef
-
So, the chef and jman called Nintendos computer animation team.
-
Who sent Waluigi out to save the characters (There screwed)
-
Waluigi was unabl to fight the Heartless because the Keyblade hated him.
-
So the heartless gobbled Waluigi up and went Rapant
-
The Keyblade sent Tashio and Louisa to our own time, and it split into two blades: Blue Flame and Orange Star.
-
"Wait s minute!" says jman, "whose gonna save the vanishing Nintendo charecters?".
-
"Wait a minute, I'll just save them myself!" I said.
-
"No! I have chosen these two to save their parents and their coleagues, or however you spell that," said the essence of the Keyblade.
-
"Hey, no keyblade tells me what to do, so shut up!" I said.
-
That hurt the Keyblades feelings so he dissapears and is never seen again.
-
The Keyblade comes back and zaps Jman, but Jman is too awesome to get hurt.
-
Suddenly, a 'J' appeared, and so did a man next to it.
-
The Nintendo characters were very confused.
-
"You fools!!" says the chef, "now the Nintendo Characters have completely diapeared!!".(causing the story to restart)
-
"Then who are these familiar faces?" Tashio asked smugly as he pointed at the gathered Nintendo characters.
-
"Those are the people I hired to build our new house dear", said his wife.
-
So then a new legend unfolded, The New Captain N Story, in which Christoph, an ordinary video game playing guy, becomes the savior of all the worlds of Nintendo.
-
"Wait. I'm not married. And Louisa and I are cousins; Mario cousins," Tasho saidi
-
Still the Nintendo characters were very confused.
-
So Captain N first visited NintenTown, the capital city of Nintendo.
-
The house is done anyway, so the rest of the story could continue.
-
Once there, Captain N met Professor Hector, who had just discovered that a League of Nintendo Villans had just formed, and they are currently working towards an unknown goal.
-
The Nintendo characters jumped with joy because they thought they were'nt gonna be erased from existence.
-
Suddenly Toad appeared and said "Look a Chain Chomp"
-
"A chain chomp with Goombitis and Crapoposis!"
-
So Prof.Hector let Captain N and Toad use the Tetrimino Ship to travel to other worlds and find out more about the League of Nintendo Villans.
-
And I took Toad out back and beat him for using that phrase way too many times.
-
So Can'n N continued his journey alone, and the forst world he landed on was Kongo Bongo Island, home of the Crystal Coconut.
-
All of a sudden, a coconut falls on his head, but because he's Capt. N, he's okay. (I plan on having this be a running joke)
-
He went and picked it up and found out it was indeed the crystal coconut.
-
It was at that moment that King K.Rool's army arrived, led by Klump, who demanded that Cap'n N hand over the Crystal Coconut.
-
Then a normal coconut fell on Klump's head, knocking him out.
-
This gave CN time to escape into the jungle.
-
It was a perilous journey through the trees and over the waterfalls, but finally made it to an abandoned native village.
-
A villager with a bump on his head walked up to CN and said, "Don't mind the bump. A coconut fell on me, but I'm okay."
-
Then The Chef warped in and asked, "Since when are there abandoned native villages on Kongo Bongo Island, and where the heck is Donkey Kong?"
-
The villager explained that he was from another village close by, and that DK was being held captive.
-
so the Chef set out ona journyto save him.
-
But he was sidetracked by...........GODZILLA!!!
-
"Call in the air support!!!" shouted CN.
-
But they sent a buncha paper airplanes.
-
So CN and TC procceded to fight the great beast that, unbeknownst to them, was sent by the League of Nintendo Villans to stop Captain N.
-
Godzilla picked up a tree and threw it at Captain N.
-
But Captain N reacted quickly and sliced the tree in half just as it was about to land on him.
-
A coconut fell on Godzilla's head, and he was defeated!
-
Then Diddy appeared and said "You're the Legenary Hero, right?"
-
"All hail the mighty coconut!" a random Kong bowed to the coconut that defeated Godzilla.
-
"Donkey Kong's been kidnapped!" exclaimed Diddy.
-
"Duh" said CN ,"Can't you see we're trying to find him?"
-
Then, King K. Rool walked in, defeated, by none other than the same coconut as before!!
-
All of a sudden, King Arthur's swallows kidnapped the coconut.
-
"Now that K.rool is defeated," said The Chef, "we should try to look for DK".
-
"But what about the coconut? We may need him again." Said Diddy
-
"He's right" said CN ,"let's look for KA at Camelot."
-
So CN,TC and Diddy boarded the Tetrimino Ship and headed for the world called Camelot(which is actually not one of the worlds of Nintendo, so it's safe from any of The League of Nintendo Villans' forces).
-
Unbeknownst to them, Waluigi and Wario had snuck on board hiding in a crate marked 'Spare Machine Parts'.
-
They had also managed to sneak several crates of bob-ombs on the ship
-
Eventually the Ship landed and CN,TC and Diddy began their search for King Arthur.
-
"This doesn't look like the Camelot in the movies," said CN.
-
Wario and Waluigi were following them preparing to blow camelot to smitherines with CN and his friends inside.
-
But the Wario Bros. were discovered by CN,TC and Diddy.
-
And the coconut, which somehow escaped King Arthur's clutches, bonked Waluigi's head, then bounced on Wario's, knocking out the Wario Bros.
-
"Well, I guess we can go back to Kongo Bongo" said Diddy.
-
But on their way back to Kongo Bongo, they were being persued by King Arthur.
-
"You've sneaked around me with your clever wordplay for the last time!" he roared.
-
"Hey wait a minute you numbskulls, we forgot DK. And now we have to face KA!!!" shouted CN.
-
So the Almighty Crystal Coconut fell on KA's head and killed him.
-
"Good, now that KA is dead we can use the power of the Crystal Coconut to save DK," said CN.
-
The Crystal Coconut gave off a bright flash of light, and suddenly everyone was back on Kongo Bongo, and DK was standing right in front of them.
-
But the Krystal Kocunut was a dud, so they are instead warped to the beanbean kingdom.
-
Thankfully, CN,TC,DK and Diddy were all there, and so was the Tetrimino Ship, so they all headed back to Kongo Bongo to drop off DK and Diddy.
-
"Hey does anybody know the way?" asked CN.
-
The coconut started to roll to the east.
-
"Do you think we should trust a freakin coconut," said TC.
-
"Well" started DK, "that is the Crystal Coconut".
-
so they all followed the krystal cocunut
-
They were traveling pretty good, until Giant Mutant Alien Thing started pursuing them, wanting a nice lunch.
-
the gaint,mutant,alien thing ate the krystal cocunut!
-
But due to the Crystal Coconut's power, Giant Mutant Alien thing exploded!
-
soon, a space ship filled with more giant,mutant,alien things in it!
-
"What about the space ship felled with more giant, mutant alien things?" The Crystal Coconut Asked telepathically.
-
"IT CAN TALK, KILL IT!!!" shouted CN.
-
Captain N tried to cut the Crystal Coconut in half, but it was invincible.
-
in anger, the krystal cocunut bonks itself on Captain n's head.
-
As the other members on board were trying to calm the Crystal Coconut, the Giant Mutant Alien Thing came out of it's ship and swallowed their ship.
-
But it was allergic, so it coughed the Tetrimino Ship up, sending it all the way back to Kongo Bongo.
-
the ship destroyed King K. Rool's hotdog cart.
-
Now that DK, Diddy and the Crystal Coconut were back in their own world, Captain N, The Chef and Olimar(he's playing the 'Jiminy Criket' role) headed for Hyrule next.
-
Link saw them as a threat and started to pelt them mustard.
Then....
-
...an army of Moblins came and Link, Captain N and The Chef had to work together to take 'em all down.
-
The chef spread salt and lemon juice all over the moblins eyes.
-
"AAAHHH!!! MY EYES ARE MELTING!!!" screamed the moblin.
-
But more and more Moblins kept coming and eventually Captain N, The Chef and Link were outnumbered.
-
Then Captain N used a wierd battle cry as famous Nintendo characters arrived.
-
"Call in...the zombies!" yelled the Head Moblin.
-
So an army of ReDeads came and Captain N's only hope was to use The Force! (just kidding)
-
meanwhile there was a war between the Breadites and the Breadoids, the Breadoids won and they came to help.
-
Then I saved this topic from being put down to page 3 for the 571/2th time.
-
So Captain N was on his way to saving the Multiverse of Nintendo by travelling to the different Universe to recruit Nintendo's finest heroes to aid him in the battle against Master Hand.
-
Then I took a hammer and killed the chef for using that multiverse thing over and over again.
-
"Look," said Toad, "A chain chomp!"
-
Captain N realized that the overuse of that quote was the work of The League of Nintendo Villains, who had an evil plot.
-
so Captain N, and the Nintendo heroes set out to defeat the League of Nintendo Villains!
-
Now, in an evil lair, Osama Bin Laden and his suicide Bomb-ombs were preparing for a terrorist attack on the Mushroom Kingdom.
-
But since Osama Bin Laden is both an offensive figure and a non-nintendo character, the Powers That Be kicked him out of the story.
-
Now, the real story began.
-
About one second later, it ended in an unfortunate accident.
-
An accident caused by the League of Nintendo Villains, who Captain N still had to stop.
-
World 1-1, Captain N kicks and smashes the goombas, making the scream in pain.
-
Capt. N thinks, "I'll never stop the villians in time!" and teleports to the home of the LoNV.
-
World 8-1, Captain N is just outside of the League of nintendo Villians fortress, whre he faces.........
-
the evil version of My Little Pony, which was just about to...
-
......Use a loud battle cry to summon an army of.....
-
Every minor enemy that ever existed in every Nintendo game ever created!!
-
But it didn't, because...
-
...it had a sock in its mouth.
-
So Capt. N went to the darkest areas of the casle of the LoNV, where he saw Bowser....
-
Eating a sandwich. A salami Sandwich.
-
which bowser choked on until he died, just then.....
-
The remaining members of TLoNV appeared: Ganondorf, Ridley, KingDeDeDe, Wolf, Mewtwo, Pokey(from Earthbound), Samurai Goroh, The Eggplant Wizard and Liquid Snake.
-
Link,Samus,Kirby,Fox,Pikachu,Ness,Captain Falcon, Solid Snake, and whoever fights the eggplant wizard defeat them all with the power of teamwork.
-
Then Wario ate a dozen tacos and the world faced its doom.
-
Wario's sudden farish exploshion caused Peach to faint and fall down a bottomless pit.
-
So Peach eneded up in Wonderland and had to face the King of Spades in a game of Hockey.
-
Then Luigi giggled like a schoolgirl because Mario ate an old shoe and died.
-
Then Luigi giggled like an old shoe because Mario ate a schoolgirl and died, and everyone sang "O Canada"
-
then Mario upchucked the schoolgirl which summoned her missing letter counterpart: Scholgirl!
-
So Mario and Luigi had to figure out how to send Scholgirl back to her own universe.
-
Then it happened...
-
Everyone was forced to stick fruit up their butts.
-
All of a sudden, Mewtwo realized that he was not evil; he was just misunderstood, so he left TLoNV and decided to use his amazing powers to help the heroes, but only when he felt they were in need of them.
-
And the world rejoiced, for they were in dire need of his great power(and his water pistol).
-
People from the Missing Letter Universe were popping up everywhere inexplicably with supposedly no way to return!
-
susddenly, Mario and Luigi met there missing letter counterparts. Mrio, and Lugi!!!!
-
Then Ganondorf opened the portal to the Gap Between Dimensions, in which all the missing letter counterparts were sucked in.
(Anyone who has awakened at least one sage in OoT knows what I'm talking about.)
-
The Missing letters became their own characters: A and I!!!!!!
-
Then A and I set up an evil form of government bent on RULING THE WORLD!!! :O
-
But it failed, so they went back top their own universe while Captain N had an epic battle against TLoNV.
-
then outta nowhere, a raccon hits captain N on the head witha banjo, but a gaint meatball falls on the raccon, Captain N is saved!
-
I'm new to this, but I'll try making a meaningful contribution to the story.
"A" and "I" decided to travel to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania to see a Pittsburgh Pirates baseball game.
-
While they were doing that, TLoNV were about hatch their greatest scheme ever....
...sell Nintendo to Microsoft!!!!!
-
But then, a Bigg Stik appeared, knocking the League of Nintendo Villains out cold.
-
Captain N thanked the bigg stik by giving it a cherry pie.
-
The Bigg Stik, sadly, could not accept this gift because it had no mouth and could not eat the pie.
-
So Captain N asked the Bigg Stik if it'd like to join the N-Team.
-
The Bigg Stik agreed and became an official member of the N-team.
-
In retaliation, Bigg Stik's enemy,[insert name of Bigg Stik's enemy here] had just joined TLoNV.
-
Huge Pole(Bigg Stik's enemy) decided, as his first action as a Nintendo Villain, that he would send a bunch of evil pencils to attack the N-team.
-
The evil pencils got sidetracked and attacked a local high school known as Wakefield High, and ganged up on three students named Bobby, Mike, and Vicki.
-
Fortunately, Captain N and the rest of the N-team (Bigg Stik, Megaman, Simon Belmont and Pit) arrived and defeated the evil pencils.
-
Then they went to find and eliminate Huge Pole.
-
Huge Pole:
HP: 30
ATK: 2
DEF: 0
VS
Captain N:
HP: 15
ATK: 4
DEF:0
Captain N attacks with kick. Deals 4 damage.
Enemy: 26 HP.
-
-Megaman attacks with Mega Buster for 6 damage.
-Simon Belmont attacks with Whip for 5 damage.
-Pit attacks with Light Arrow for 5 damage.
-Bigg Stik attacks with Bigg Hitt for 10 damage.
Huge Pole is defeated! Gained 3200 Exp.
-
that's not the answer I expected, the N team returned to the fortress of LoNV, but before they rntered, they saw an enemy.
Ganandorf:
HP: 70
ATK: 8
DEF: 2
-
"(Oh no!)" cried the Bigg Stik, who was using telepathy because it couldn't talk. "(He's gonna EAT us!)"
-
"Don't be silly, Bigg Stik, Ganondorf doesn't eat people" said Captain N.
-
Ganondorf punches Captain N in the face! Captain N is confused!
Captain N:
HP:6, Confused.
-
"(You big hulking creep!)" the Bigg Stik yelled(ish). "(TAKE THAT)" Bigg Stik poked Ganondorf in the eye, blinding him.
-
MegaMan charged up his beam thingie, and fired it stait on Ganondorfs stomach for 8 damage!
Enemy: 62 HP
-
The Bigg Stik hit Ganondorf over the head repeatedly, causing 10 damage.
Ganondorf: 52 HP, blinded
-
captain N attacks with kick! but ganondorf counters for 8 damage!
Captain N: fainted
-
"(NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!)" the Bigg Stik cries. It starts moving towards Ganondorf, with the others having to hold it back for its own safety.
-
Pit attacks with arrow! But hits Mega Man instead!
MegaMan: Faited
Captain N: Fainted
-
The Bigg Stik snaps itself in two out of dispair.
-
Simon Belmont?, in confusion, attacks Pit!
Pit: Fainted
MM: Fainted
CN: Fainted
BS: Fainted, in half.
-
Ganondorf gives the finishing blow to Simon and says "Ha ha ha, so this is what has become of the N-team? How pathetic."
-
Then out of nowhere, SushieBoy joins, And uses his "Super Sushie Speed" to run circles around Ganondorf, dizzy fying him, then I use my "Super Sushie Strength" to knock Ganondorf to the ground! Ganondorf is defeated!
-
Ganondorf being defeated somehow revived the n-tire N-team. The pun was nessacery.
-
Captain N then asked SushieBoy if he wanted to join the N-team.
-
Before he could answer, something exploded over there. No, over there. To the left. See? There.
-
It was King K. Rool!
-
Yes, King K.Rool exploded, causiing a new universe to be created, also known as Yrtnuoc Gnok Yeknod.
-
King K. rool did explode, but no universe was created, instead, Pit fainted from the sudden fiasco.
-
Everyone splashed water on Pit to wake him up.
-
Afterward, the N-Team and SushieBoy had to travel to Yrtnuoc Gnok Yeknod to help Loor.K get his bananas back from King Gnok Yeknod.
-
in confusion of just bein at a new planet, Pit faints again and sqishes the bananas!
-
"(Great. Just great.)" said the Bigg Stik sarcastically.
-
So the N-team members who werent unconcious had to fight King Gnok Yeknod.
-
Mega Man Crushed Captain N's........... Ham sandwhich! Causing 30 damage!
H. Sandwich HP: 470
-
King Gnok Yeknod then ate the sandwich and tried to smash Bigg Stik.
-
The sandwhich was actually a poison mushroom so King Gnok Yeknod died, leaving behind a red coin, which SB put in his change purse, then Pit slapped a tree.
-
The tree happened to be the Bigg Stik's father, Tahl Trii, so the Bigg Stik slaps Pit.
-
but bigg stik slaps Pit so hard that his head falls off, falls to the ground, and breaks his nose.
-
"(Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry, Pit!)" the Bigg Stik cried.
-
then a bear came and used bigg stik as a toothpick.
-
The Bigg Stik unleashed its Bigg Pao-er and blew the bear away. Literaly.
-
Bigg stik fell to the ground, stabbing Pit's head, and Sonic's lung!
-
The Bigg Stik wasn't sharp, so when it fell, it only poked Pit lightly in the head and didn't even touch Sonic, whose game series just happens to fall in my Top Six.
(Off topic, Pit seems to take a lot of abuse, huh?)
-
Sonic's Lung got angry at Bigg Stik and attacked Pit's Head!
-
Sonic asked "How could my lung attack someone's head if it's in my body??? This place is weird. I'm gettin' outta here." And with that, he ran off into the sunset, taking his lung(which was back where it should be) with him.
-
Then Captain N said, "can we stop the nonsense and get back to stopping the LoNV?"
-
sonic tripped on a bannana peel, dying.
-
Sonic ended up landing on his butt, and since your butt is you body's most cushioned place, he did not die.
(SushieBoy, I will reverse all your attempts to kill a character that is in my Top Six!)
-
Mega Man, from so many abuse and commands from Captain N, went crazy and pushed Captain N off a cliff.
PS: GRRRR, fine.
-
In desperation, the Bigg Stik jumped after Captain N. Whether it was trying to save Captain N or was committing suicide, I'll never know.
-
then a new story begun, with Captain N dead with no leader thr N team and sonic (and his lung) went to Kill sony's preident, it was quiet in the Sony mansion until sonic farted so loudly throught the halls the Sony's president awoke.
-
And he marched down the bazillion stairs to go tell whoever woke him up off, grumbling all the way.
-
sonic's lung popped out and said "RUNN!!!!" so the team made a run for it, outside the called air support, which threw a neclear bomb onto the mansion. the team had succeded thier task! Next challenge is.....
-
GETTING THROUGH THE HEDGE MAZE.
-
The nuke wiped out the hedge maze, so the real challenge (that isn't a challenge) is to walk across a barren nuclear wasteland.
-
It was easy until half way they came accross the.....
-
Evil woman who was bound and gagged.
-
The evil woman was the Wicked Witch of the East, and then a house landed on her.
-
They moved on the hedgemaze, then afterwards thier next challenge was...
-
The scary cookie.
-
Which was so scary, only one person could eat it. That person was....
-
The Cookie Monster! He came up and gobbled the cookie, then he joined the N-team, then the n-team, Sonic (and his lung), SushieBoy and the cookie monster went on thier next mission.
-
But Cookie Monster got distracted by the wonderful cookies that Kanga had baked.
-
Cookie monster blew up from eating, organs and blood flew, The Bigg Stik cried, and Pit fainted.
-
The entire audience gasped at this stunning turn of events and a kid, whose favorite Muppet was Cookie Monster, cried.
-
The Kid decided to get revenge on Kanga, so he went and asked a pirana plant to attack Kanga, it happened that night.
-
For some reason, Roo was able to see the future, so he told Kanga and they hid at Tigger's house.
-
And then the Pooh characters were removed from the story when Christopher Robin closed the book.
-
So the pirana plant killed kanga, while DK ate some bananas.
-
People at the Walt Disney animation studios redrew Kanga, therefore bringing her back to life. To this day, they still can't figure out why most of their Kanga drawings have a saliva-like slime all over them and are torn up and stuff.
-
Then Chuck Norris arrived and did his famous roundhouse kick.
-
Mario then went to his room and slept like a baby.
-
Then a marching band woke him up.
(Who's Chuck Norris???)
-
it was a army of baby bowsers ready for war and they wanted war
-
The army of Baby Bowsers were very bad at marching band, so Mario blew up from their bad music.
(This is Chuck Norris)
-
So Bowser exacted his revenge on Mario by....
-
... torching all his overalls. o_O
-
Luigi felt bad about his bro' not having overals, so they shared! But mario ripped right through all the overalls.
-
Wario tried on a pair, and they fit perfectly, causing Mario to go into a slump for being fatter than Wario.
-
toad then tried one, bt his huge bulk and fattness ripped the pants!
-
Peach was so fat, she ripped the pants just by looking at them!
-
And GiftedGirl had to laugh.
-
Then Pit fainted from laughter, and Daisy, with her pot belly, destoyed all the overalls and dresses in the world!
-
So Daisy found a wish-granting Star fruit, ate it, and wished that she were the hottest female Mario character.
-
Peach went on a contest to gain weight and to see who was the ugliest female mario character, Waluigi joined in too, he wanted to gain weight, 4 weeks later Peach was 7 times the size a Mario, but Waluigi had gotten thinner and broke in two like a stick and died. And Daisy was still hot, she became a super model.
-
Actually, Daisy was so hot, that every male in the MUshroom Kingdom went after her.
-
But unfortunetly, she tripped on a twig, and the whole MK was running to fast, so they crushed Hot Daisy!! Killing her.
-
Fortunatly, Luigi managed to lure the guys away with a decoy and brought Hot Daisy back to life with a 1-up Mushroom.
-
Pity then marry's the Hot daisy decoy, not ralizing until 50 years later that it's is a decoy.
-
Luigi wanted to impress hot Daisy, and began weight training to gain 40 pounds of muscle.
-
Afterwards, Luigi became, Buff Luigi! Then Pit fainted from Buff Luigi's buffness.
-
Suddenly, Pit and Buff Luigi began to fight with swords, but the swords were the stick-like remains of Waluigi. (o_0)
-
So Hot Daisy decided to sit and watch the fight, as she was surprised that Pit hadn't fainted yet.
-
As pit went n for the kill, he stabbed Buff luigi's chest, Pit fainted from what he had done.
-
Buff Luigi's muscles on his chest acted as very effective armor, causing him to be unharmed.
-
Then, suddenly, because of all the craziness of the story Toad turned into a popcorn machine, Hot Daisy turned into a chew toy, Buff Luigi cried, then turned into a bottle cap, Mario turned into a gluestick, which Bowser used in arts and crafts class, meanwhile with Fat Peach......
-
Fat Peach had used the reality-bending Blue Tomato to turn everyone into those objects because she was so sad about being fat, while my character, Rob-Bert, had to fight her to get the Tomato back, as he was the Tomato's rightful owner.
-
Fat Peach used Fat Crush on Rob-Bert!! the He used whatever his attack is on Fat Peach!!
-
He didn't just use an attack. Since he was stcu kunderneath Fat Peach's blubber, his buddy Hazie came to his aid by pulling him into the shadows.
-
Fat Peach then got up, only to be attacked by a flying popcorn machine!
-
Fat Peach ate all the popcorn without a problem and evolved into Fatter Peach.
-
Fatter Peach got up, but her large weight and small legs made her rool around like a huge ball, she destroyed her castle and went on a rooling rampage!! Only Mario gluestick and Luigi bottle cap could stop her.
-
They tried, but wound up running away as the fat ball chased them down a hill as if they were in an Indiana Jones movie.
-
Mario gluestick dug a small hole with luigi bottle cap, they snuck in the hole, Fatter Peach rolled by them, only to land in a lava pit, Fatter Peach was defeated! Then bowser walked by, he was uprised to find his gluestick, so he picked up Mario Gluestick and Luigi bottlecap and took them to his castle! Now Mario and luigi had to escape from: Bowser's Art's and Craft's class!
-
Bowser's Arts and Crafts class turned out to be a crap-shoot. Meanwhile, the Bigg Stik was making a plan to rescue Mario Gluestick and Luigi Bottlecap.
-
bigg Stik was planning to dress up as hot daisy, lure bowser out of the class, and beat him up in a RPG battle.
-
So, the Bigg Stik stole one of Hot Daisy's dresses.
-
But Bigg stik forgot to take his medications and died before he could steal anything.
-
Its partner in justice, the Bigg Rokk, continued the plan for its fallen comrade.
-
But then the Bigg Rokk discovered it couldn't fit into the dress.
-
So, Bigg Rokk then asked Wario to try it on, he wanted to come over his house, but Wario mistook a donut shop for Bigg Rokk's house.
-
Wario ordered 1,000 donuts, ate them, and rolled on home, crushing several civilians on the way.
-
As Wario rolled, Mrio came, but tripped on a gas tank, causing a huge exploshion, which leveled an entire Pizza hut! Wario then sweared to destroy Mrio because he destroyed his home (pizza hut).
-
Unfortunately for Wario, Mrio escaped to the Missing Letter Universe.
-
Wario than jumped into the dimensionhole, but got stuck...
-
He swore a mighty swear that couldn't see print, or else everybody would die.
-
So Wario had to wait days with no meals so's he could fit back through the hole.
-
Then Pooh smacked Wario upside the head for ripping off his story.
-
Wario saw the fat, honey covered, small shirt wearing Pooh, Wario licked his lips and ate Pooh, nearby Pit DID NOT faint!!! He apparently hated Pooh.
-
Tigger whacked Wario upside the head with his tail, knocking him unconsious and causing him to spit out Pooh, and also causing Pit to faint. XD
-
tiger then told Pooh to take a shower, but tiger couldn't resist the smell, which was so strong he vomited on his shoes and died. Pit then woke up to find Pooh mooning him, so Pit fainted.
-
"Why does Pit keep fainting in this story?" GiftedGirl asked.
-
"Because, he is a sissy that thinks dolls are cool and likes boybands." SushieBoy continued. "That's why he faints on occasion so much" Then SushieBoy opened a shiny lunchbox, took out a sandwhich and cut it in half, to share with.......
-
...himself, and Ultima Shadow glared at him as he ate the sandwich, but then laughed at the fainted Pit.
-
Then The Chef flung his SPATULA into the heart of the fire-breathing dragon and....
-
....Used the blubber to make Krabby paties. Mr. Krabs then slaped TC up-side the head and said "you're loosing me money!!!".
-
Then The Chef got a job at the Chum Bucket and helped Plankton beat Mr. Krabs at his own game.
-
Then PaperLuigi stepped on Plankton, and Plakton died.
-
Then spongbob came, so evryone started singing the FUN song.
-
Patrick was singing the fun song, but he got so excited that he had a heart attack and passed out.
-
Sandy appeared, then called the hospital. Pit then noticed Patrick had fainted, so he also fainted.
-
The pie from "Dying for Pie" came back and exploded once again, killing everyone but Squidward, who managed to say "ow," and then Mario showed up and said, "What the heck, I thought this was a Mario story?"
-
luigi then came, and ate everyone's corpse, then turned into a zombie.
-
Then he was turned back to normal by a Starman.
-
And GiftedGirl fainted because of the SpongeBob stuff. (I don't like SpongeBob, but I don't care if you guys do or not.)
-
Daisy then started laughing at GG, but then she realized.....
-
....that she still never said why she didn't like Spongebob.
-
So, Daisy started banging GG's head repeadedly on a table trying to get her to wake up, only to realize that she was dead....
-
So then she dropped GG and backed away slowly.
-
Only to be stopped by luigi, who cried, and cried, and cried some more, he couldn't stop crying! He created a huge tidal waves of tears, covering every square inch on earth. the world was an ocean.
-
Just like in Megaman Legends, so Megaman Trigger would've become the new main character, if it weren't for the fact that this is a Mario story, so the new main chracter is.......
.... Trigger Mario, star of the new game, Super Mario Legends!
-
GiftedGirl woke up and said to Daisy "I'll tell you why I don't like SpongeBob if you buy me a pinata."
-
"AHHHH!!! It's a zombie!!!" Daisy screamed. "KILL IT!! KILL IT!!! so she started hitting GG on the head with an old board.
-
Then Trigger Mario used a Sleepy Bomb on Daisy and gave GG a pinata so that she'd finally tell why she dislikes Spongebob.
-
"I hate spongebob because... ACK!!!" she was stopped by Trigger Mario, who misplaced her for the pinata, he was banging GG with a huge rod, until nothing but candy, wires, and newspaper was left.
-
Then Fergy, a pinata from Pinata Island, put Gifted Girl back together and said "This is exactly why I don't like going to parties!" GiftedGirl said "I don't like SpongeBob because he's scary looking. It's those eyes! They look like they're gonna come after me in the night... XO"
-
Then The Chef said "That's it!? That's why GG dislikes SB!? Let me tell you something, Spongebob is a lovable soul. He wouldn't hurt a fly. Unless he's behind the wheel of a boatmobile (because he dosn't know how to drive)."
-
Then GiftedGirl ran away, crying because people didn't understand her. She ran off and married Gonzo the Great.
-
Then Trigger Mario, along with his brother Luigi, went on their latest plumbing job, only to find out that the Koopas were after the Mother Star, which is buried deep beneath the Earth's surface.
-
Luigi ran up to his brother and said "I'm so sick of you taking the spotlight away from me!!" and killed Trigger Mario.
-
Kirby took the word "Killer" from "Killer Shark," and became killer Kirby, and invincible Juggernaut bent on world destruction, while "Killer Shark" was just "shark", a friendly dolphin bent on spreading happiness throughout the world.
-
Then they all joined hands and sung the Australian national anthem. :)
-
But then Mario was brought back to life by a 1up Mushroom, becasue this is supposed to be a MARIO story.
-
Then GiftedGirl said "Dude, it stopped being a Mario story a loooooooong time ago."
-
Then The Chef said "I am determined to bring this back on topic", so Mario and Luigi were flying around the world in their airship, The Roto-Router, along with their pet Yoshi, Gonzales.
-
SushieBoy then said "Well with what you posted, it doesn't even sound like a Mario story..."
-
The The Chef said, "There's Mario, Luigi and a Yoshi so far. How does it not sound like a MARIO story?"
-
"ummmm, see ya!" *explodes* the explosion managed to destroy the ship's motors, sending the Bros. and gonzales spiraling to their doom.
-
Fortunately the ship made a crash-landing on Portobello Island, populated by Mushroom People, nobody was killed or injured in the crash.
-
.... Expect luigi, who broke his legs..... and his arms, his ears....Nose, so gonzales carried him to a hospitsal, but luigi was to fat and broke gonzales' legs.....and his arms, his ears...Nose, so Mario carried them both, but the weight broke mario's legs.....and his arms, his ears...Nose, so they all layed there on the floor of the cold, hard street.
-
Wario suddenly walked up to them, and stole their wallets, laughing, as Waluigi watched happily, and muttered, "We're gonna eat tonight-a!"
-
Then a Star Spirit noticed Mario, Luigi and Gonzales lying there, and revived them using the last of his power.
(I'm trying to make this stroy coherent, so please don't do anything stupid anymore.)
-
Before the star spirit flew up to star heaven, it hit a tree that fell on mario, luigi, Wario, waluigi and gonzales, killing them again.
-
Then the tree fell down a gaping plothole.
-
Then the plothole brought Mario, Luigi and Gonzales back to life, and SushieBoy decided to stop being an idiot and refrain from ruining the story by instantly killing the characters or such nonsense again.
-
Well, look how stupid the original one was!
http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=4177.msg69848#msg69848
Anyway, back to the story.
Koopa the Quick ran up next to them and shouted, "Hey, Mario, race me! I saved all of my money to buy these awesome new shoes that will still lose me the race because I can't run to save myself!" and let out a grin similar to this: =D.
-
So Mario Raced against KTQ and him beat easily, and recieved a new item for winning: The Sword of Toadstool!
[Yes, I know how stupid the old one got, but it was at it's stupidiest when people like marioguy ruined the story for no reason. Besides, I got plans for this story. ;)]
-
Then the Ancient Swordsmen came to give Mario some advice about swordfighting. "Remember, young one," they said. "If there's a four-foot piece of steel coming at you, GET OUT OF THE WAY." Then they dissappeared, never to be seen again and not changing the course of the story at all.
Dang, that was more than one sentance. *slaps self*
-
Mario then hit GiftedGirl on the head with a hammer, and, in the process, broke the fourth wall- in panic, he rebuilt it, but it was a bad job (he's a plumber, not a bricklayer) and so he decided to keep going with the story and walked up a red slate road, which was parallel to the less famous green cement road, the equally famous blue asphalt road, and the more famous yellow brick road.
-
Then PaperLuigi said, "How come the only people interested in this story are myself, Ultima Shadow, GiftedGirl, The Chef and Sushieboy?"
-
Ultima Shadow replied, "I don't know," and watched as a ninja jumped in front of Mario!
-
It was a Ninja Turtle. ;)
-
Not just any "Ninja Turtle", it was one of the Koopa Bros.!
-
However, the Koopa Brother looked strange. His mask was a brown colour, and, perhaps the strangest, he held twin swords that read 'This space for rent' and 'I font believe it'.
-
But since he was in Mario's way, Mario challanged him to a sword fight.
-
Then Mario used his sword to slice up some cake, which caused massive amounts of chocolate to fly everywhere and create "Mega Mini Chocolate bit mosters."
-
So Mario and the Koopa Bro. had to smite them all.
-
And so the chocolate things were smited. Er, smote. Smet. WHATEVER.
-
So the Koopa Bro. decided that Mario was a worthy fighter and vowed to assist him in his time of need, after which they parted and went their separate ways (meaning Mario went to Portabello Town and the Koopa Bro. went who-knows-where).
-
While luigi skydived into a pool full of mac and cheese.
-
Then an annoying song with every sentence ending in "oni" began playing.
-
Because it was the background music for Portabello Town, but fortunately the person playing Super Mario Legends turned the volume down.
-
But then Dr Teeth and the Electric Mayhem began playing REAL LOUD!!!
-
Mario flipped on some Matrix glasses, loaded his shotgun and..........began dancing to Electic Mayhem and Dr. Teeth's music!
-
Because the person playing the game activated an easter egg that causes Mario to do that.
-
Suddenly, a lasagna came out of nowhere.
-
This Lasanga restored 50 of Mario's HP if eaten.
-
But Mario didn't eat it, and was stomped to death by Bonetail.
-
So the player was forced to continue the game from the lats place he saved.
-
But then the player powered off because the lasagna triggered the button, only to realize he didn't save.
-
So Mario was p***ed and said, "Mama Mia, now I have to start all the way back at Glitzville and I was at the freakin' Pit of 100 trials," and the player said, "but the pit doesn't have save points," and Mario's head exploded because he had no idea where he last saved, and PaperLuigi was angry that he misused present and past tenses in his very long and stupid run-on sentence.
-
So the player had to start a new file, thus causing the story to restart from this post:
Then The Chef said "I am determined to bring this back on topic", so Mario and Luigi were flying around the world in their airship, The Roto-Router, along with their pet Yoshi, Gonzales.
-
At which point mario declined to have anything to do with this story, so luigi took his place.
-
Suddenly, Phil Rye The Bread Guy hopped onto the ship! He had Total power over bread!
-
All, except Mr Baguette who was immune to his bread-control powers.
-
"Oui!" said Mr Baguette.
-
Suddenly, Mr Baguette was attacked by two croissants.
-
"Sacre bleu!" shouted Mr Baguette as the croissants bludgeoned him with whole wheat breadsticks.
-
Then Mario stumbles into the scene and says "C'mon! Luigi! Treehouse Of Horror is almost on!"
-
To which luigi replies "I'll join you as soon as Star Trek has finished".
-
So Mario and Luigi enter a parking lot, confusing it for thier den.
-
Suddenly they are ambushed by Wario and Waluigi.
-
But suddenly Waluigi turns into Ronald Mc Donald, and takes of his shoes and starts to beat wario with it.
-
Wario pulls out a Mini/Mega Hammer and hit Ronald McDonald on the head turning him into a 25m tall Waluigi,
-
Waluigi proceeded to turn everyone into girls with his new found power (go figure, I couldn't think of anything else, and squishing people is boring.)
-
And then the Snow Miser came and turned Waluigi into a snowman. XD
-
The Heat Miser came and challangee Snow Miser to a duel.
-
That kid from YuGiOh appeared out of nowhere. "Not that kind of duel!" shouted Snow Miser. "Go away!"
-
Snow miser farted, "Gahhh!" the "kid" screamed, "what's your problem? open a window! ahhhhhh!" he breaks out of a stained glass window and runs outside to reach a pipe, but a missle lands on him in the last second.
-
The missile explodes into a shower of confetti which (for some reason) unfreezes Waluigi.
-
"That was really weird." said Waluigi.
-
He then explodes into confetti himself, kids jump up and down to get the candy.
-
The candy was laced with steroids so all the kids had 50 homer seasons for their baseball teams.
-
However, after the season was over, baseball was abandoned and the Mushroom Kingdom adopted cricket as a national sport.
(cricket ftw w00t)
-
Unfortunately, this prompted petey pirahna to attack the mushroom kingdom.
-
Petey Piranha landed on top of Princess Peach's castle, but was too clumsy and fell through the roof on top of a few Mushroom Retainers.
-
The toads got angry and rebelled, Petey then into a Pizza Hut, only to find....
-
Pizza the Hutt making a deal with Lone Starr and Barfolomew.
-
Dark Helmet's head explodes and pinatas are beaten to bits.
-
The Ronald McDonald thought "What the heck does this has to do with anything?" and stumbled into wendy's.
-
PaperLuigi laughs at SB's post for being totally random to the story.
-
SushieBoy shudders at the thought, then turns into a massage chair.
-
Then I picked off a pass from a Mushroom State quarterback and took it 110 yards for a touchdown.
-
Jman then got hospitailsed after 2 Chargin' Chucks violently tackled him.
-
The two Chargin' Chucks were arrested for using steroids. XO
-
The Steriods were then notified as Chemical X, so the Chargin' Chucks turned into the Power Puff Girls.
-
And I laughed at those pansies, saying "Ha ha! You guys are flowers!"
-
Jman was shot with a blinding laser!
-
Then Buttercup proceeded to beat the living crud out of Jman while I laughed and laughed.
-
So, Bubbles (???) Gave the Chef some, and sliced him in half, cartoon style.
-
I walked around blindly and yelled, "And to think I watched your show all these years!"
-
Then Dexter and Mandark got into a fight, Johnny Bravo tried to hit on some hot girl, Cow saved Chicken from the Red Guy, and Ed, Edd and Eddy got ready to put their latest scam into action.
-
Sudenly, someone stepped out of the shadows to stop all the random madness... Santa Claus with a candy cane lightsaber! :D
-
Mickey came in with his Keyblade! He tried to defeat Santa, but it failed!
-
Then Santa, Mickey and Jack Skellington had to band together to defeat the Easter Bunny!
-
Then the Easter bunny revealed himself to be...an overpaid actor in disguise!
-
Everyone yelled their heads off.
-
So the overpaid actor was baished to the Puppen Universe, where lived on Earth-P for the rest of his life. (P stands for Puppet.)
-
Meanwhile, a man named Dave and his girlfriend Victoria went to Abercrombie & Fitch.
-
And a guy named Abercrombie Baseball made a great sales pitch.
-
Then a salesman came and shamefully advertised his products.
-
That salesman was actually a J-man, a man who carries around a giant J and poses with it for pictures.
-
Dave and Victoria were upset that he was walking around with his huge "J" instead of helping them find a green muscle fit Deer Brook polo shirt in medium.
-
Suddenly, Mario appeared, armed with a tommy gun, and in a fit of homicidal rage killed all the non-mario characters in this story.
-
Then Sonic arrived, with loads of birthday cake stuffed in his mouth. "Ughhh" He said. "Why does a maniac with a gun always come in this story?" But he gets gunned down by....
-
Then, without warning, Dave sprung back up, having not been killed but having faked it instead.
-
Then, I, (Dressed up as yoshi) Eats Dave!
-
Then SB spit Dave back out when they realized that they had to band together to help Optimus Prime stop Megatron from helping Unicron devour the Earth!
-
The Earth got devoured anyway, sorry!
-
GG tried to apologize, but it failed! She got stomped by a bronto.
-
GG tried to apologize, but it failed! She got stomped by a bronto.
[[two sentences]]
-
Then there was the sound of angelic chorus, as down from the heavens descended Chuck Norris and he delivered a kick that could shatter bones into the rear of Indiana Jones.
-
Then the time skipped ahead to when Mr. Rogers commit ritual suicide.
-
Then, Mario came and reminded everyone that this was "A Mario Story.
-
Suddenly, a chain chomp appeared.
-
"Look!" Said Toad. "A Chain Chomp!"
:)
-
"Look!" Said Toad. "A Chain Chomp!"
:)
[[two sentences]]
-
Do you even know what I'm quoting?
-
Then the Chain Chomp bit Toad's head off.
-
Then SushieBoy remembered that there was supposed to be a comma instead of a period in the line he used.
-
The chain chomp liked the taste of toad, so he set off for Toad Town.
-
"D'oh!" said Sushieboy as he got eated by Chain Chomp.
-
Then a shot rang out, the maid screamed, a door slammed, and a pirate ship appeared on the horizon!
-
While millions of people were starving, the King lived in luxury.
-
Then a clever peasant tricked the king with the ole double-the-rice-grain-each-day bit.
-
He was soon caught in the airport, taking a trip to Swissland.
-
Swissland was raving about the hot new book "Memoirs of a plumber" by Mario Mario.
-
Meanwhile, in Toad Town the chain chomp started attacking the towns residents.
-
Then Swissland banned the book because it showed Mario's last name.
-
Because people in Swissland weren't allowed to have last names, so Mario decided to write another book, which was entitled: How I Got Banned in Swissland For Having a Last Name.
-
That book also got banned in Swissland, and in Radiator Springs, too.
-
Then I took a hammer and killed GG.
-
Then the volcano erupted and the entire land was showered in lava and charred rock.
-
But Groudon made the lava stop because he's cool like that.
-
Then inflation caused the taxes on tiny breads to skyrocket.
-
And The Chef kicked me in the groin for referencing Animaniacs as much as GiftedGirl used to mention Homestar Runner.
-
"Why do you control other people just so they can kick you?!" Shouted Mario, "That's-a-really desparate!!"
-
"Because I deserved it!" Jman said.
-
....and the the dam broke and the whole town was flooded, but by the time the cavalry arrived, it was too late.
-
So the Mario Bros were commissioned to fix the dam.
-
But they went down the wrong pipe.
-
And ended up in... the Himalayas! Where they were eaten by the Abominable Snowman, who thought they were sno-cones.
-
His toes were cut off by the Gale Boomerang.
-
Then Trogdor smote the Kerrek, and all was laid to burnination.
-
Then Snowman's Land cooled it off.
-
Waluigi went to Snowman's land and froze himself only to wake up 300 years in the future!
-
Where it was illegal to be so tall and skinny at the same time, so he was given the chair.
-
The chair was a very nice colour, so he placed it in his dining room where it complemented the mantelpiece perfectly.
-
But he spilled hot coffee on it.
-
"Aw crap!" said Waluigi.
-
Suddenly, a huge cradle falls on him, and Wario sleeps like a baby in it.
-
Then, an anvil dropped on Wario and Mario laughed and laughed like he just saw Dumb and Dumber for the first time.
-
So I set off with three stout sub sandwiches, and my best The Cheat to find this mystical land.
-
Then GiftedGirl said "Doy! >_O" because this story had 666 replies(not counting this one, of course).
-
So I stole the King of Town's dunce cap and renamed it "Lotionman".
-
"Lotionman...that's so great, I fogot to laugh!" said Mario.
-
So Mario was crushed by a falling Bubs' Concession Stand.
-
Then Mario realesed some sort of energy blast thing and blew Toadsworth away.
-
Then Gandalf the Grey, and Gandalf the White, and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's Black Knight, and Benito Mussolini, and the Blue Meanie, and Cowboy Curtis, and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, the Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston, and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan, all came out of no where lightning fast, and they kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy..... face.
-
A random person fell over laughing.
-
And Rocky Balboa beat up Strong bad in a boxing match.
-
"Wuh??" Replied a confused SushieBoy.
-
"Right," Toadsworth said loudly, "this is turning into nonsensical... um... nonsense!"
-
So I decided to have a jam session with Lemon Demon.
-
Then a time hole into the past opened up in Princess Peach's castle.
-
Then I took a day tomorrow and will bake a frogonomon last week while I basted chicken tails with carbon monoxide sauce.
(an homage to Mario nonsense.)
-
Then a plothole opened up in the ground, sucking everyone and everything into it's gullet.
-
But they landed in a gutter, which lead down to a pair of vicious pirahna plants!
-
The Pirahna Plants were too busy watching TV to be very viscious at the moment.
-
But one of them lost the remote, so they both travelled 100 miles to find it.
-
Instead they found a Wii-mote, and decided to play a few rounds of Wii Sports with it.
-
But he strap was too weak, and it sent the Wii-mote flying through the air and down a pipe.
-
So they called the Ghostbusters. XD
-
But they were too busy fighting the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man to do anything.
-
Then oprah kicken a baby through the air, and scored a touchdown.
-
So Optimus Prime challenged Megatron to a game of backgammon,.
-
Optimus prime won the backgammon battle, and then killed a guy for doing a bad Yakko Warner impression.
-
And everyone got an electric guitar and ROCKED OUT.
-
But Rob-Bert decided to rock out on his kazoo because he didn't know how to play a guitar.
-
His kazoo playing was so great, he was awarded a Grammy.
-
He threw it out the window, 3000 feet below, toad was hit, and woulda' broken his nose if he had one.
-
So Rob then apologized by letting Toad keep the Grammy as a doorstop.
-
Then a famous movie star came and slapped Toad for degrading an Grammy like that.
-
Then Rob ranted about how much he hates the mainstream movie industry and decided to invite Toad over to his house for a round of Mario Kart.
-
Rob totally pwned Toad's butt, and everyone was happy.
-
Then everybody started caroling.
-
But Everybody caught a case of laryngitis and had to stop singing, so Rob asked Da Glob to take his place.
-
Then Mr. Hanky wondered who Da glob was.
-
GiftedGirl wondered who Mr Hanky was.
-
The Chef told SushieBoy that Da Glob was one of his characters, and then he told GiftedGirl that Mr. Hanky was from South Park.
-
The entire cast of South Park migrated to south of the park.
(BTW, thanx, The Chef. I've never seen South Park, so I wouldn't know.)
-
Then we all started to play DDR Cha-cha-cha dance party edition!!
-
"Woo!" shouted GiftedGirl as she danced like... well, like someone who was dancing.
-
Kirby appeared on the scene saying, " kirby! KIRBY!! KIRBY!!! KKIIRRBYYY!!!!!"
-
(kirby) ;)
-
Then The Chef yelled at kirbyman for acting like a moron and went to ask the mods to ban him.
-
The PaperLuigi said "Why must we ban so many new people?"
-
"Because this new person was given a substanial amount of time to clean up his act and he still hasn't" said The Chef.
-
"Oh," said PaperLuigi.
-
So Strong Bad decided to check his email.
-
Rocky Balboa came out of Strong Bad's computer and beat him at another boxing match, and I used someone else's plot device from a few pages ago.
-
But the plot device was really yet another plothole, which unfortunately sent the story back in time to before the sequel was ever made, so Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad went out for a walk....
-
OOOH, I KNOW THIS ONE..."Look", said Toad, "A Chain Chomp!"
-
Mario pulled down his pants and farted a mighty fart; the chain chomp died.
-
And The King sugested that Mario take Beano.
-
But that had too many side effects, so Mario turned into Dr.Mario in order to find a better cure for himself.
-
Mario took some pills that were colored red, yellow, and blue in different combinations.
-
This resulted in his gas getting cured, but he also gained the ability to control fire, wind and water.
-
And he accidentally caught his hat on fire.
-
So Mario got a sombrero to make up for his dead hat.
-
Then Mario ate some burritos, making his gas come back, and then he farted another mighty fart.
-
The Verizon guy happened to be right behind him, and he fainted from the smell of the fart.
-
Thus, everyone with the Verizon phone service got cut off from the rest of the world.
-
So Mario decided to use his newfound powers, gas and sombrero to help everyone get a new phone service.
-
And the reader of this story died from laughter.
-
But Mario used his Sombrero-Enabled MexiMagic to bring the reader back, so there would be a point to having a story.
-
Then Mario attempted to use all his magics at once, and created a temporal rift that threatened to destroy Mexico as we know it.
-
But Wario flew into the rift and sealed it shut with his great girth.
-
Then Wario inexplicably turned into a newt, and fell through the rift, again endangering Mexico as we know it.
-
Then the aliens moved Mexico to a safer location so it wouldn't be endangered.
-
Then I typed "CLEESH Mexico" and turned Mexico into a frog.
-
Then the frog said, "Look! A Chain Chomp!", pulled down his pants, farted and destroyed the world.
-
Then, due to a grave miscalculation of scale, the frog's fart turned out to have only destroyed a keychain globe, explaining the Chain Chomp mix-up.
-
But unfortunately, the Earth was being threatened by a meteor about to crash into it, so everyoner had exactly three weeks to built an artiificial replacement Earth, which they names "Chia-Earth".
-
Unfortunately, Chia-Earth was only big enough for a few people, so it was up to Mario to save the world.
-
Mario decided that he needed the ancient power sealed deep inside the bowels of Austrailia-Land to defeat the meteor.
-
But then he got eaten by a snake.
-
Thankfully, the snake was plumber intolerant, so he barfed Mario back out, after which Mario headed for Australia Land to reclaim the ancient power source.
(I've noticed that this topic is getting more and more like the rock-paper-scissors topic, which means that every time someone attempts to advance the story, someone else instantaneously cancels out their attempt. This is not fun.)
-
But then Mummipokey came out to attack Mario.
-
And Mario used his MexiMagic combined with water magic to cast Sombrero of Cold on Mummipokey.
-
Being a creature of the desert, Mummipokey was weak against ice attacks, so it was instantly defeated, after which Mario continued his journey.
-
But then ahead...was the almighty Deezer Cat!
-
It asked Mario a Sphinx-esque riddle.
-
Mario cheated by looking up the answer on GameFAQs.
-
So then Deezer's Cat sent out a blue shell.
-
Mario put on a Kuribo's Shoe and stopped the blue shell.
-
The collision of the shell and the shoe exploded the INTERNETS.
-
"The INTERNETS" is the name of this toy elephant that sits on my desk for some reason, and is now exploded; meanwhile, Mario proceeds to kick the blue shell at the Deezer Cat, causing eddies in the space-time continuum to lose their sofas.
-
Then Deezer's Cat said, "Look! A Chain Chomp!" pulled down his fur, farted, and used Mario as his litter box.
-
But Deezer's Cat and the Deezer cat were two different things, and Mario continued his journey.
-
So eventually Mario reached Australia Land, and now had to figure out how to draw out the ancient power .
-
Then Deezer's Cat showed up and chased Mario around, knocking over a Power Glass.
-
Mario threw a Poison Mushroom at Deezer's Cat, shrinking it, and continued his figuring out how to draw the ancient power.
-
It turned out that in order to break the seal, the hat of a legendary hero had to be placed on the nearby stone monolith, so Mario took off his hat and put it on the monolith...
-
The Monolith started shaking, and the mighty LASER YOSHI rose from the ground!
-
Mario jumped on the LASER YOSHI's back, and started flying through space inexplicably, blowing up stuff, until he came to an inexplicable door blocking his path; the door was indestructible, so he pressed the "throw key to unlock inexplicable door" button, which apparently worked, because he continued blowing stuff up.
-
Until the LASER YOSHI eventually blew up the meteor that was going to crash into the Earth, meaning that the Earth was saved!
-
But Mario wanted to keep blowing stuff up, so he continued until he found an asteroid belt with lots of Moai statues.
-
This resulted in Konami collaborating with NIntendo on a Mario-themed Parodius game entitled Mariodius.
-
Then Mario became rich (and not with those worthless coins, either) when I bought every copy of the game.
-
Seeing this, I decided to pitch my idea for a sequel which retells the plot of Super Mario Land and features Mario piloting the Sky Pop/Sub Pop and fighting Tatanga in the end.
-
But Mario had low salary so he rebelled against the Directors.
-
This somehow resulted in Miyamoto growing a sweet 'fro.
-
The sweet 'fro was made out of candy.
-
Which was eaten by Wario, who then got a deal to star in Wario World II: Curse of the Black Gold, which was another idea of mine.
-
Afterwards, someone played Pokemon Trozei and got the Skip Bonus.
-
But his demo time expired, so he ran into a wall.
-
The Wall got angry and flung the Player to Donkey Kong Island.
-
Neither the donkeys nor the Kongs there wanted him, so he was flung into outer space, where he crashed into the LASER YOSHI, which was being borrowed by me.
-
But LASER YOSHI forgot how to breath in space, and suffocated, then toad got up from his popcorn machine to get punch.
-
Unfortunately, he pressed the wrong button, and got punched instead.
-
So Wario found a flag with a little 2 on it.
-
So Wario re-spawned LASER YOSHI and flew around TMK, spreading flaggy evil.
-
Then I stole the LASER YOSHI back and turned it into an option, so it would fight alongside the Warp Rattler in the ultimate battle of good vs evil!
-
Then GiftedGirl asked "What's a Warp Rattler?"
-
donotcare95 said, "The Warp Rattler is the ship the player pilots in the first Gradius game."
-
Then Vic Viper and Twinbee told the Warp Rattler that he was old and lame.
-
Then Yugi activated a trap card, causing Elmo to lose half of his life points.
-
Then I threw Elmo into the Shadow Realm before the game was over because he killed one of my favorite TV shows, then I asked Oscar if he wanted to go to the city dump with me.
-
But it was really Mario wearing the Glad Bag Glad Rags outfit.
-
Oscar was so angry at Mario for trying to impersonate him that he challenged Mario to a game of chess.
-
But Mario was getting help from the Chess Dragon, and won in two moves.
-
Being a grouch, Oscar took great pride as it was his intention to lose the game.
-
Then Mario went back to the LASER YOSHI again and nuked 123 Sesame Street from space.
-
Then I got into en extreme state of panic since my favorite VG character just nuked my favorite children's educational TV progrum.
-
Meanwhile, someone said "Onomatopoeia" and got a brick thrown at them with "SHUT UP!!!" written on it.
-
"POW! BARF! WHACK!" exclaimed the brick.
-
"Nooooooooooooooooo!" Mario exclaimed as he fell into a vat of giant pasta, which quickly changed his emotion
-
Then I cast Cone of Whatever on Mario, causing ecstacy-induced pain.
-
Then I decided to go bak in time to stop 123 Sesame Street from getting nuked and figure out what caused Mario to commit usch a horrible act.
-
Mario then declared he didn't like Peach, and dreamt about muffins.
-
"Mmm, muffins..." said Mario.
-
So my plan to bake muffins for Mario worked, and 123 Sesame Street didn't get nuked.
-
Big Bird, Bert, Ernie and the others that I can't remember all jumped for joy, while Elmo got turned into a ruby statue.
-
So Wario saw the ruby and grabbed it to take to his palace.
-
The Elmo statue turned all of Wario's treasure into monsters and Wario said "Oh no! Not again!"
-
Than I warped in and smashed the statue, thus turning Wario Manor back to the way it was supposed to be, and creating a world without Elmo.
-
Then I used the power of my mind to stop time, and went back to before I nuked 123 Sesame Street from space (because I found another way to be sure).
-
Then I used my powers to sit there and do nothing while watching Sesame Street burn.
-
Then we stopped using the word "then".
-
Then someone else said "then", namely me.
-
Then, the fire department came but tripped on an icecube, then, it happened.
-
"What happened?" asked everybody.
-
Mario had apparently left his shower on overnight, and his whole house was flooded to resemble an underwater fortress.
-
"Where did those Thwomps come from?" asked Mario.
-
"I sent them there to crush you!" said Bowser.
-
"But I thought you were allergic to sending stuff!" exclaimed Mario.
-
Bowser started to go into a fit of sneezing.
-
But then the fit met Ness, and they ran off happily into the sunset.
-
So Lucas had to take Ness's place, thus reviving the doomed project that was Mother 3.
-
Unfortunately, Super Mario Galaxy had too many bugs in it, so Mother 3 was put on the back burner for 4 months, while the bugs were fixed.
-
So Mario found himself in a bug-infested raw code hole that was supposed to be the farthest reaches of space.
-
Luigi went in to save him, but was thrown into another dimension.
-
That dimension was..
The Missing Letter Universe!
-
Thn th Mssing Leter Unierse replced te nomal univese.
-
So Mrio and Lugi had to help Mario and Luigi save both their universes from Bowser and Bwser.
-
Wrio and Wluigi decided to steal some coins from Bowser and Bwser while the 4 were fighting, but Wario and Waluigi had the same idea.
-
"Okay seriously" SushieBoy said as he stepped in, "Who uses my universe without my permission? Besides, his name is Walugi!"
-
Then The Chef said "If you remember correctly, I helped you think up that universe. The name was my idea."
-
Partial credit!
-
PaperLuigi decided to blow up the universe of missing letters and create the universe of missing periods
(See? There's already one missing right now!)
-
Then the missing letter universe destroyed the universe of missing periods (You said the universe of missing letters :D)
-
However the Universe of Missings Letters is different from the Universe of Missing Letter in that people often loose their mail; the remaining citizens of the Universe of Missing Periods declare war on the Universe of Missing Letter because the Universe of Missing Letter destroyed their universe for no reason. (huff, huff)
-
Then the Anti-Monitor, Unicron, and Master Hand combined forces to destroy all those universes, then they headed for more, thus prompting Captain N, The Keyblade Master and Zonic the Zone Cop to gather as many heroes as possible to combat the trio of villains.
-
But Waluigi stopped all three villians in about 2 seconds when he used his "Shinning Rising Sun Uppercut."
-
Then an announcer, about 20 minutes late, announced the return of Captain N.
-
But then the villains came beck because it turned out Waluigi didn't even have a "Shinning Rising Sun Uppercut."
-
Then I kick Captain N off the scene, Waluigi saw me and tried to throw his shoe at me, but he bent over and broke in half.
-
Doctors did their best to put him back together with advanced technology, and so "Robo-Waluigi" was born.
-
So Robo-Waluigi ended up having to take Captain N's place thanks to SushieBoy kicking him off the scene.
-
Robo-Waluigi and his Band of Super-Hero's decided to fight off and destroy the villians once and for all, after a quick stop at McDonalds.
-
When they arrived at McDonalds they all sat down for some bacon pizza, but Robo-Waluigi sat on Kirby on accident.
-
Thus sparking an incredible sense of deja vu, as similar events transpired in the first Mario Story.
-
Robo-Waluigi decided to forget the deja vu for now, and recruit new super hero's such as Super Mario (who was once Mario) The Incredible Bulk (who was once Wario) Dino Lad (who was once Yoshi) and IronLuigi (who was once Luigi).
-
So the new team of heroes decided to call themselves "The Ninvengers".
-
Then somebody punched each of the heroes in the face for coming up with such a stupid name, which caused them to rename it to something less ridiculous.
-
The I told that somebody to shut up because the name was supposed to be a parody of The Avengers.
-
Then that somebody said that it was a crappy parody worth being punched in the face for.
-
Then I punched the somebody in the face before he could punch me, then set out to help The Ninvengers save the universe.
-
Then all universes exploded.
-
And only the DigiDestined were left, along with Slappy Squirrel, to fight the villains by sticking dynamite in their pants.
-
But someone decided to throw a water balloon at the main circuit board, causing all the worlds Rubber Duckies to rebel against their leaders!
-
Then the rubber duckies fell into a plot hole, due to an unexplainable twist.
-
It was the same plothole that had left all of the Sonic X fans in confusion.
-
Then the Sonic X fans and the confusion fell into the plot hole, which was growing bigger, and threatened to destroy Earth.
-
So Mario, in an effort to reclaim his rightful position as the story's main character, set out to stop the plothole.
-
But then he fell into the plothole, which had already destroyed Earth, and was spreading through the rest of the universe.
-
I appeared and began to patch up the hole in the plot.
-
Then Jman fell into the hole, which began spreading once more.
-
"Is that the best thing you can think of? Falling into plotholes?" SushieBoy said as he sealed up the plothole, he rescued everyone out, and Mario who was truly grateful, asked Nintendo to make a game for him.
-
So I went over to Gamestop the next day and bought The Adventure of Mario and SushieBoy.
-
Which would be imposibble because we where still wrking on the title. so everyone waited 7 months.
-
So I cryogenically froze myself for seven months so I could get the game faster.
-
Then I finished playing the beta version of the Legend of Paper Bird Person, and it was so awesome that it caused the plothole to open up again, and swallow all with plothole-sealing powers, so Mario had to go on a quest to gain plothole-sealing powers before it swallowed the Mushroom Kingdom; he didn't have much time, because it was already at the far edge of the Beanbean Kingdom.
-
Eventually Mario came to the first dungeon, Blargg's Cavern, and he had to avoid huge lava pools and Podoboos within.
-
Welcome new user!
-
As one of the Podoboos finished saying that, Mario jumped toward it after grabbing a Starman, only to realize he had grabbed a Starman from Earthbound, which threw him back onto the platform without realizing it was flying into a Podoboo.
Also, I hope you're not serious, SB, or else you'll feel pretty stupid, considering all I did was get a name change to match #tmk.
-
Welcome new user!
Did dontcare get a name change?
-
EDIT: Wow, you edited as I posted. Yeah, I did. Now go back to the story.
-
PaperLuigi was left wondering if there was a new member or a name change, and the crazy farm came and got him.
-
The camera then went back to the main story, which had Mario walking through Blargg's Cavern, and being thrown back onto a platform as a Starman from Earthbound plowed into a Podoboo, resulting in an explosion which propelled Mario through the rest of the cavern.
-
Thus Mario wound up in the room of the first boss, Biggest Blargg, who Mario had to fight for the first piece of the key to the Tower of Power, which would give him those plothole-sealing powers.
-
Then some of the energy from the plothole permeated the room, and Mario found himself outside of the 100-floor Tower of Power, with every piece of the key...no, wait, that's not plothole energy, it's speedrun energy...anyway, he entered the Tower to find it was a Mystery Dungeon-style tower, so he started looking for food to eat as he ascended the Tower.
-
All the while I sat playing the limited edition single copy ever made of "Jman vs The Chef" for Nintendo DS.
-
Then the cameraman was fired for zooming in on FF members, and the replacement cameraman went back to the story; Mario had climbed 20 floors and, for some reason, was fighting Pokémon and ASCII.
-
Fortunately, he had a Rock Candy on him, which hit them all for 200 damage a pop.
-
That's when I wondered what Rock Candy was.
-
Then the cameraman got fired for focusing on the other FF members, so I had to take his place, and while I was at it I gave SushieBOy a copy of SMRPG so he could answer his question, after which Mario had made it up to the 62nd floor, which contained an Octorock, a Space Pirate, a Waddle Doo, a Wolfen, and a Starman Jr.
-
"OH! HAPPY DAY!" Exclaimed SushieBOy, that's when he got rammed by SushieBoy, he stole his game, ran across the room, beat all the baddies up , leveled up to Lv 4, got an autograph from Mario, and jumped out the window.
-
Mario then watched as more and more Space Pirates and Waddle Doos filed into the room, and then had to battle everything in a Burly Brawl-esque fashion; he destroyed everything (though most of the Space Pirates killed each other, having aim almost as bad as Stormtroopers), and headed up to the 63rd floor, which contained limitless spaghetti, lasagna, and ravioli; he tried to escape, but the food just kept coming, and he just kept eating.
-
Then Mario decided to use his Yoshi summon to call in an army of Yoshis to eat the food for him, thus clearing a path to the door to the 64th floor, which oddly contained nothing except an N64.
-
I came running up the stairs exclaiming praises for the room of unlimited servings, only to find that the Yoshis had indeed finished off everything.
-
That's when an airship arrived and started to bomb the tower, sending Mario crashing to the bottom of the tower, floor -27!
-
The airship was really Bowser's, as he had come to blow up the Tower of Power so Mario couldn't get the power to seal plotholes, thus allowing Bowser to kidnap Peach, and you people might think that Bowser was too stupid to realize that the universe would be destroyed by a plothole anyway, but it turned out that the plothole was really all part of Bowser's newest elaborate Princess-kidnapping scheme, which involved him distorying his own universe with a plothole, kidnapping Peach, and then conquering the Missing Letter Universe after killing and replacing Bowsr!
-
Jman then, jumped onto the airship, pressed the off button, the ship crashlanded on Yoshi's Island, with Jman and Skinny Albert on it!
-
Meanwhile, Mario was recovering from the blast that sent him flying and then realized that without the Tower of Power, there would be no way for him to seal the plothole!
-
Mario decided to walk away, and send Toad out to buy some pudding.
-
"Albert, did you have like plastic surgery or something?" I asked him.
-
Then I decided to get a new camera since the old one was being stubborn and kept zooming in on Jman, while Toad went to get the pudding ofr Mario, but I wasn't just any pudding, it was the Pudding of Power, the very thing that would help Mario save the universe!
-
That's when toad became hungry and ate the Pudding of Power, he became the awesome Atomic Toad! (Member's name)
-
So Atomic Toad flew into the blanket of space, and shot a brilliant beam of energy at the plothole that was heading towards the universe, thus destroying the plothole once and for all!
-
Mario wondered where his pudding was.
-
Wario said "here it is," with pudding all over his mouth and fingers.
-
Enraged, Mario cried,"Is no pudding safe from the hands of this monster?!"
-
Then Wario was bum-rushed by a rushing bum, which caused him to run out of health and become Beaten Up (stupid low-level Wario...).
-
Wario found some cheese and ate some to gain back his health, but not before the bum attacked Mario and Luigi!
-
When the bum rushed Mario and Luigi, they ducked in such a way that when it tripped, it flew over their heads and into a wall, causing 50 (+12) (+10) damage; Mario and Luigi won the fight!
-
So like, Wario gained +20000000 ex. points because the cheese he ate was totally like, some kinda secret weapon!
-
Unfortunately for Wario, since the realm they were currently in doesn't use ex. points, his +20000000 of them was useless, though the +300 Mus, Mys, and Mox substats were useful, as they leveled him up thrice (remember how low his level was).
-
Wario said "all this level-upin' is making me hungry," and ate a ham sandwich, which healed his health thrice, but since his HP was already maxed out, it was useless.
-
So then Mario and Luigi suddenly got back attacked by a Dry Bones Deluxe for 3000 damage!
-
But it was a miss, so Mario burned it to dust with a fireball.
-
Wario ate the remains and lost 30 health points.
-
Wario got homesick and he called his mom, but the lines in Australia are always busy.
-
So he called a secret UFO help line that would beam him to anywhere in the world, so long as his weight did not pass 500 lb, which it did.
-
So he got Skinny Albert to do the job, but it failed!
-
Wario eventually died, and Mario laughed.
-
"Do you have no heart, because a man just died and you laugh," I asked Mario.
-
"He's not dead, he's just faking," Mario said as Wario was being zipped up in a body bag and carried away.
-
Then Wario used his strength to burst out of the body bag and ate a piece of Garlic which upped his Attack by 200!
-
But it did no good, since they weren't in a battle.
-
(actually, Wario was dead; Mario was too much of a dofus to see that, and thought Wario was just faking)
Wario, since he was dead, came back as an undead zombie!
-
Wario went after Mario first, since the plumber laughed at his death.
-
Mario did not want to become a zombie, so he snatched a nearby shotgun and blew Wario away.
-
But anyone who's ever played the Wario Land series know that Zombie Wario is indestructible and can only be restored to normal by sunlight!
-
PL had played the WL series, and told Mario to push Wario into the sunlight, but not before Waluigi had been eaten by Zombie Wario.
-
Then Daisy came and said hello to everyone, making Mario's head explode.
-
Then Zombie Wario ate Daisy, as well as Mario's corpse, before walking into the light and reverting into his ordinary form.
-
Since Waluigi, Daisy and Mario had been bitten by Zombie Wario, they became zombies too, leaving only Wario, Luigi and Yoshi to defend themselves.
-
Except that Waluigi, Daisy, and Mario hadn't been bitten, they had been eaten, so Luigi changed his last name, and "Super Wario World" was a hit.
-
Yoshi had nothing left to do, so he went to a local dance club.
-
Yoshi was dancing like nobody had ever seen, because Wario and Luigi weren't far enough in SWW to meet him yet.
-
So a guy named Bob challenged Yoshi to a dance-off.
-
Some serious dancing broke out between the two, which threatened to destroy the town if not stopped.
-
The two danced so hard, the eath shook, buildings crumbled, presidents flew to the moon, and cat's barked.
-
Then I used the Blue Tomato to restore reality, and this resulted in the next part of the story, Super Mario Tactics Advance, in which Mario, Luigi Wario and Yoshi must recover the Golden Wiimote and save Peach from Smithy Mk II.
-
And Smithy was bashed out off the story and changed to Bowser.
-
Then Bowser roared a mighty roar as Mario farted a mighty... no, I'm not going there, sorry!
-
But I will!
Mario farted a mighty fart and broke up the dancing between Yoshi and Bob, but since the fart was stronger than the dancing, the Earth shook even more.
-
And cracked in 17 pieces, the size of potato wedges, Wario ate 4 of them.
-
And once again, died of a heart attack, causing Mario to laugh.
-
Then I decided to reset the story from my previous post because everyone was making the characters do the same stupid things over and over again.
-
Unfortunatly, the Blue Tomato was broke.
-
PaperLuigi was angry at The Chef for restarting the story at his previous posts for the 50th time and haulted the act.
-
I had some cookies with mayonnaise.
-
Then I told PL that I didn't restart the story that many times and was only trying to build on something instead of letting the topic turn into The Pointless Topic 2.0 or Endless Rock-Scissors-Paper 2.0.
-
This topic (and prequel) Were already pointless and crazy, but you just want to turn it into your own story, start a fanfic or something.
-
Mario busted in through the wall and said "Mama Mia"!
-
He was then flattened by the Koopiet Union, a new Commie army started by Bowser.
-
But it wasn't really Bowser, as Bowser is thoroughly opposed to Communism; it was Smithy, come back for revenge.
-
Smithy formed an alliance with Culex and together they were going to bring sunshine happiness........er, I mean destruction to the Mushroom Kingdom.
-
So the Smithy/Culex Union let loose an army consisting of Mack 3.0, Bowyer 3.0, Yaridovich 3.0, Axem Rangers Zeo, Dark Wart, and Dark Tatanga.
-
Then Mack, Bowyer, Yadrovich, Axem Rangers, Wart, Tatanga fused together to make Dark Bowackexangadavichart 17.0, to avoid all the clutter.
-
Mario was severely overpowered by this new foe and needed to enlist the help of Sonic the Hedgehog to take it down.
-
But Sonic was too busy farting mighty farts so Tails went to help Mario.
-
Talis was beaten by the new enemy's stupid vision, which turned him into a fruit.
-
Then Mario decided to lure the enemy into an area of the story that wasn't being written by PL or SB, and teamed up with Link and Samus to battle the beast.
-
However, Kirby sucked them back into PL's side of the story (because he was tired of TC trying to write the story his way) and Mario ate Tails.
-
Then TC challenged PL to round of Melee because he wanted there to be an actual story and not yet another topic where everyone posts utter nonsense.
-
"Utter nonsense is what makes the world go round," said Tails the fruit, who had been turned into a pile of crap thanks to Mario, while PL accepted TC's challenge.
-
Then TC ate fruit Tails because he didn't come to he forum for utter nonsense, he came for intelligent discussion with fellow Mario fans, with some slight nonsense added sporadically for flavor.
-
But since fruit Tails was actually crap, TC got a stomach ache and had to be rushed to the E.R for a check-up.
-
Then every FF member who was adding themselves to the story (with the exception of myself, seeing as I added the Warp Rattler before my name change) was flung into an alternate dimension where everything is dead, and the story resumed as usual.
-
Warp Rattler died anyway, and Mario found a piece of cake and ate it.
-
Then, as a direct result of PaperLuigi missing the very important article "the", Mario's cake turned out to be a bomb, but nobody died, including myself.
-
PaperLuigi said "there's no 'the' that needed to be in the sentence," and PL died and never came back because he is tired of putting himself in the story.
-
Mario then found an undiscovered planet in the middle of the street, he put a flag with a little "M" on it.
-
Wario however thought that he had given all of his gold to the magic genie and won the planet himself, so he was very p***ed off.
-
So Wario and Mario waged war against one another for control of the planet.
-
Mario said "Meh, I don't wanna fight. If want to see a fight go to the ANGST thread." He then built a small house on the planet and lived happily ever after.
The End.
-
"Look," said Toad. "A chain chomp!"
-
The Chain Chomp was sent by Wario to destroy Mario, because even though Mario chickened out, Wario still wanted him off the planet.
-
Mario farted a mighty fart, the Chain Chomp died, and Wario sent killer zombies to destroy him.
-
But Mario's fart had controlling stuff in it that made the zombies do the macarena.
-
They danced s hard they exploded.
-
Over in Hyrule, Link abused a chicken until the mega chicken army of doom came after him in a swarm.
-
The Mega Chicken swarm then came to Link, and poked him to death.
-
Mario went over to Link and gave him a super mushroom so that he could come back to life and they could fight the swarm together.
-
Then Samus ran by, being chased by about 50 Metroids, which saw the Cuccos and latched onto them, giving Mario and Link a three-minute headstart before they started being chased by Metroids.
-
Meanwhile, Wario had finally gotten control of the planet, and decided to christen it "Warius", but all was not well, as the Metroid and Cuccos swarms were sent by Mother Brain and Ganon in a team effort to destroy their arch-enemies once and for all.
-
Mario then personally beat Wario up himself "WHAT I TELL YOU?! I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT!!!!!" He screamed as he pounded Wario, he just cried for mercy, but Mario laughed and laughed, Mario then hit him in the head with a mallet, rolled him into a rug, set it on fire, and pushed Wario off a cliff.
-
Wario vowed his revenge as he fell into the chasm, while Mario set out to help Link and Samus fight off the Metroids and Cuccos.
-
Samus charged her beam thingy, and blasted the Cucco's to fried chicken, which Mario ate afterward.
-
Then Link froze the Metroids with his Ice Arrows, after which Mario melted them all with his Fire Flower.
-
Which did nothing but bring the Metroids back to life, they ate Link in the process.
-
But the Metroids spit Link out because of his adventurous spice.
-
Samus gasped audibly at the sight of the Omega Metroids (lesser types don't have defined enough mouths or don't have mouths) and ordered focusing upon the less-armored chests of the enormous beasts.
-
Within seconds, they took care of the Metroid army, but then they were bombed by a squadron of Wolfens, thus requiring Star Fox's help.
-
As Fox arrived, he got blasted by the Wolfen, and exploded, that's when Mario took off with his flying Yoshi, and blasted them all.
-
But then Andross himself appeared, and grabbed Mario in his left hand and Yoshi in his right hand.
-
"This is more boring than the time I battled Roger the Potted Ghost!" Said Yoshi as Andross tightened his grip on them.
-
Then some kid with a deck of magical crown-shaped cards started swinging a key-shaped sword at Andross's hands, freeing Yoshi and Mario; all heroes present teamed up to destroy Mother Brain, Ganon, Andross, and some guy with a pink scythe.
-
That's when Mario went on a rampage, he started to knock everyone on their heads with a steel folding chair.
-
So Mario was recruited by the WWE for his actions.
-
Then Yoshi and the other heroes summoned an army of turtles (8-bit, hand-drawn, and ninja varieties), which destroyed the villains, and the heroes and turtles all watched Mario in his first match.
-
Mario's first match was, unfortunately, againts the Undertaker.
-
Mario set the ring on fire, which caused an uproar, until Link fired one of those silly Ice Arrows...and missed the fire, hit Mario's opponent, and caused a greater uproar.
-
Mario hit Link with a steel chair and knocked him out, while Luigi jumped into the ring to help Mario beat the frozen Undertaker.
-
Then the Vic Viper flew through the roof of the arena, destroying the ring; other things that crashed into that included a giant brain, three floating Moai heads, and, for some strange reason, an Arwing.
-
Then along cam Samus's Gunship, the Falcon Flyer, the Halberd and the K.Rool Cruiser, which caused Mario to realize that it wasn't a wrestling ring they were standing in, it was really a video game flying maching convention.
-
Which got over taken by comic book nerds, they kicked all the non-mario characters out.
-
The comic book nerds were all killed in a huge explosion that resulted in jocks taking control of the earth.
-
Then the jocks were forced off the Earth by Bowser's army, as he clearly thought of taking over the world before the jocks did.
-
The jocks rebelled against Bowser, and made him explode with footballs.
-
"Craaaaaaaaaaaaaap!" shouted Bowser.
-
Miyamoto smacked Bowser and sent him to bed without supper for using vulgar language.
-
"You've never listened to rap music if you think my language was harsh!" Bowser said.
-
Then, due to some strange police box things happening, the world returned to its normal state.
-
The story continued as normal, Mario was feeding his pet bird, Spanky.
-
Then, because SushieBoy used a comma splice, Mario's pet bird exploded.
-
Mario ran to his room and cried himself to sleep.
-
Then Luigi tried to cheer him up by getting him a new bird, but then Wario kidnapped the bird and held it for ransom.
-
Wario demanded 5000 gold coins, the rights to Mario's castle, and a box of Fluffer Nutters brand cookies in return for Mario's bird.
-
Mario tried to use a guinea pig named Fluffernut hidden in a box as a substitute the "cookies".
-
But it ran away, he later got run over by a truck, driven by a dog!
-
Wario was very displeased with Mario's actions, so he threatened to kill the bird if he didn't recieve his demands by sundown.
-
That's when the sun got bigger and bigger, and landed on Wario's face, scarring him for life.
-
"Um.........whatever," said Wario, and he continued to threaten Mario.
-
Then, because SushieBoy used a second comma splice a few posts earlier, Mario became addicted to microgames.
-
So Wario took this opportunity to hit Mario with a steel chair from behind and steal the 5000 coins instead of bribe for them.
-
Mario ran to hide in his Coney Island Disco Palace.
-
Wario told Mario to break down and dance at the Disco Palace for Mario's bird, but since Mario had a huge lump from the chair, he was having some trouble thinking up moves!!
-
So Luigi came to the rescue and used Thunderhand on Wario for 3500 damage!
-
That's When Mario got up and moonwalked towards Luigi and slapped him upside his head.
-
Then a wave of babies hit the Disco Palace.
-
Wario was trying to dance, when Waluigi came in a got down with his bad self!
-
This and the baby flood distracted Wario enough for Mario and Luigi to escape with the bird, even though Luigi was slightly miffed at the fact that Mario smacked him for no reason.
-
Wario punched Waluigi and blamed him for losing the bird, even though he only wanted to dance the night away.
-
Meanwhile back at Mario's house, Mario went to feed his new bird when he discovered that the bird was dead, and someone had left a note saying "BWAHAHAHAH!!! I killed your bird, now you'll be too choked up to bother saving the Princess!! - Bowser".
-
But Mario saved the Princess anyway, only to find that it was the wrong princess.
-
"Look!" said Toad. "Errr....I mean, thank you Mario, but our Princess is in another castle."
-
That's when Mario kicked Toad out the window, Toad flew in the air, he hit Bowser on the head, killing him, Toad saved the Princess, he became a national hero, "D'oh!" Said Mario.
-
But Toad died the next day, and Mario ate his bird's dead body.
-
It tasted like chicken.
-
The reason for all this is that the space imp Bozar from the canceled Limozeen Saturday morning cartoon turned reality upside-down, leaving Luigi to resurrect the dead Toad and Bowser, and save his estranged brother.
-
Then a bunch of badgers started doing a repetitive dance.
-
Luigi killed the badgers by sending a snake after them, and proceeded to find Bozar's evil lair.
-
Luigi met up with Wario on the way, and he apologized for stealing Mario's bird.
-
As a way of apologizing, Wario smashed down the door to Bozar's lair with his awesome strength.
-
Mario appeared and said to give him the bird, to which Wario replied that he'd love to, but the censors wouldn't allow it.
-
Then I conked Jman on the head because A) That's a lame joke, B) Mario's bird was dead, and C) Mario was kidnapped by Bozar, so after Wario broke down the door, he and Luigi proceeded inside the base, where they confronted an army of "babe-liens", also from the Limozeen cartoon.
-
PaperLuigi bonked himself on the head and ate some cheese, while the babe-liens challenged Wario and Luigi to a dance off, but Wario smacked all of them because he was tired on dancing.
-
So Wario and Luigi moved on to the next room, where they had to face off against Mitch Overlord in a game of Street Fighter Alpha 3.
-
But Mitch was too busy eating cake, so Wario and Luigi went up to the next room, which turned out to be a porta potty.
-
Both began to feel a little uneasy at the sight, and smell, of Mitch Overlord's porta potty.
-
Wario barfed up his lunch and was taken to the E.R, where he had to sign a waver that gave the doctor 5 million dollars.
-
Realizing that he just gave up 5 million dollars to a doctor, he had a heart attack and had to sign another waver for 5 million dollars.
-
While Wario was in the E.R., Luigi had to use his plumbing skills to unclog the porta potty and get to the next room.
-
The journey wasn't pretty, but it had to be taken.
-
Luigi realized midway through that Porta Potty travel is quite inconvienient, climbed back out, and walked through the door into the next room.
-
The next room was filled with clowns, Luigi's 2nd favorite thing in the world (the first being Mario) and he became a circus clown, traveling the world and being a huge idiot.
-
But then Wario, who had just gotten back from his operation, knocked some sense into Luigi and reminded him that they still needed to save Mario from Bozar.
-
Then they realized that Bozar had already been defeated by the cancellation of the Limozeen cartoon, so Mario was technically still safe..
-
Because of that realization, reality was restored to normal, and now Mario had to save Luigi from the clowns with the help of Yoshi.
-
Yoshi ate all of the clowns while Mario stayed at home and watched soap opera's while eating ice cream, so Luigi came home and joined him.
-
Luigi sat on a stool, but it was made of pure gold, he pawned it at the nearest item shop.
-
Mari with an O decided to eat hamburgers while Luigi was doing this, and pawned his cheese at the nearest shop.
-
Then, because SushieBoy used YET ANOTHER COMMA SPLICE, the world exploded, resulting in a HAPPY END!.
-
Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad went for a walk.
-
"Look," said Toad. "A Chain Chomp!"
-
Then the Chain Chomp ate the two guys sitting in recliners watching the movie.
-
The Chain Chomp was locked up in the zoo, where Wario threw chips at him when the cage was unlocked.
-
Then the Chain Chomp started following Link around and eating stuff.
-
Then Ganon decided to kidnap the Chain Chomp and use it in his latest plan to get the Triforce and Zelda, while Mario decided to help Link since his name was in the story's title.
-
Then the CTOEGMC invaded Hyrule, and Ganon, the Chain Chomp, Zelda, Mario, and Link all teamed up to defeat them.
-
The battle was short because Mario farted a mighty fart, so to celebrate they all went to McMeaty to drink milkshakes.
-
Then the world exploded because of poor taste.
-
But God put it back together again because the world wasn't supposed to explode for another 5 million years.
-
Then the world was destroyed to make way for a bypass.
-
Wario was so fat that he clogged up the bypass, and the workers had to get a flying bulldozer to move him out of the way.
-
So the Vogons shot Wario down, while a new world was created with the intention of calculating the answer to the ultimate question, Mario ended up on board the Heart of Gold thanks to the Improbability Drive.
-
PL had no idea what all of that meant, but he went along with the story anyway, and told Mario to take over the ship.
-
He drove it straight into a bowl of petunias.
-
Then The Chef gave PaperLuigi a copy of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy to read, while Mario witnessed a whale falling through the sky.
-
The unfortunate whale began to try and interpret his current situation before hitting the ground at a high speed and... bouncing straight back up, hitting the Heart of Gold and propelling it straight towards Planet Zebes.
(I don't feel like going with the story. :D)
-
PL tossed out the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy because it was a terrible book, and Planet Zebes was destroyed.
-
Then, in place of Zebes, Zebeth appeared, with a huge sign on top of it that said "EAT AT GERUTA'S".
-
So Mario and Sam Aran ended up having to bust Metroids at Geruta's.
-
The Metroids busted a move.
-
So Mario and Sam busted a move to counter the move.
-
Before the Metroids could counter the counter-move, the Heart of Gold rolled on all of the Metroids and squished them.
-
Then it rolled off of them and unsquished them, enabling them to bust another move.
-
All the while, a small girl who had been watching the whole thing... LAUGHED HER FREAKIN' HEAD OFF.
-
While the little girl was laughing her head off, a giant mole kidnapped Peach and Mario said, "Well there's something that doesn't kidnap Peach everyday."
-
Mario shrugged his shoulders and jumped on Yoshi's back.
-
Yoshi collapsed on the ground due to Mario's weight.
-
Two other Yoshies carried Yoshi to Lexington Chiropractic Center.
-
But the center turned out to be possessed and overrun with zombies created by none other than Zombie Wario himself.
-
That didn't matter now since Wario had been his normal self again for quite some time, so the zombies let Yoshi have a Mid Mushroom to restore his HP, and he rejoined Mario on his mission to save Peach from the giant mole, which turned out to be Montelbon, King of all Monty Moles.
-
Montelbon had plans to turn Peach into a mole, and not the kind that digs through the dirt, either.
-
Mario knew that the moles lived underground, so he bought a huge digger for $500,000,000 so he could dig about 3 feet.
-
Which conveniently allowed Mario and Yoshi to reach the Monty Mole's secret underground kingdom, where they had to fight their way through Montelbon's defense force, which consisted of Mega Moles.
-
The Mega Moles were armed with rocket launchers, chainsaws and every other weapon you could think of......so a huge battle began to take place!
-
Mario and Yoshi beat them easily due to having a couple of spare Power Stars on them at the moment. *invincibility song plays*
-
While charging through the Mole Men ranks, Mario stopped for a bite to eat, grabbed some super shrooms at McShrooms, and the two of them met at The Mole King's castle, a 40 story building that reached about 39 3/4 stories above ground.
-
However, Yoshi was repossessed by the bank, because Mario did not have $500,000,000 to buy the huge digger; and now, he had to rescue Peach on his own.
-
Then, while Mario sat there pondering how a sentient being could be repossessed, Peach got tired of waiting, beat up Montelbon, and grabbed her parasol; where she walked, enemies balked, and she floated gently down.
-
Peach landed right Mario's arms, then they went back to the castle for some cake, but as soon as they got there, the discovered that the castle had been reposessed along with Yoshi as part of some evil plot to reposess everything in the whole kindgom by Tatanga.
-
Then Tatanga was also repossessed, causing all nonrepossessed folks to wonder who was doing all the repossessing and making "repossess" cease to look like a word.
-
Since that word of which you speak of did not exist anymore, Tatanga was back to normal, but he still wanted to take over the world with his new, flying Pargosa Mach 2.0, a huge fortress of traps and such.
-
Then, since that word had ceased to exist, Yoshi and the castle also returned, so Luigi went on a quest to defeat Tatanga while Mario, Yoshi, and Peach ate cake.
-
Because Tatanga had made a second attempt to kidnap Daisy, and Luigi was smitten with her.
-
Luigi was seriously angry at Tatanga for takin' his girl, so he gathered up a few nukes and went after him.
-
He also went after The Chef, who used a sentence fragment.
-
Then The Chef whipped out his SPATULA and challenged WarpRattler to a manly duel, while Luigi was getting ready to battle Tatanga's ground troops.
-
Luigi launched a few rounds of ammo at the ground troops, while the huge battle between TC and WR threatened to rip apart the universe.
-
but then Kirby ate every body
-
PaperLuigi ignored warioman's incredibly stupid post and continued the story: Luigi launched a few nukes at Tatanga, but the blast was eaten up by Tanaga's "Nuke Suck-em up".
-
Fortunately for Luigi, Professor E.Gadd had just built the Ultra Nullifier 64, a device that can deactivate any weapon, which Luigi used to stop Tatanga's Nuke Suck-em-up, as well as his robotic guards and the Pargosa Mach 2.0.
-
Because of this, the nukes exploded and the planet the two were on was thrown into nuclear winter.
-
Just then, something incredibly amazing happened.
-
Which was the explosion of the nukes also creating a huge mushroom cloud over the planet; Wario thought it was a super mushroom, so he ate it.
-
Thus turning him into Smoke Wario, who with his newfound powers, decided to ransack the world of all it's riches, except that Luigi and Tatanga were blasted into space due to the nuclear explosion, and everyone else was freezing to death due to the planet getting winter-fied.
-
Mario was busy selling Popsicles (and was making no money due to the fact that the temp. was bellow 0) while Luigi and Tatanga started punching each other in space, and because there was no friction, the two flew apart and never saw each other again.
-
Luigi ended up back on Mushroom Earth and told Mario what happened, prompting them to set out and stop Smoke Wario as well as find a way to restore the world to it's normal temperature.
-
Smoke Wario rulled the Earth with an iron fist, so he had about a billion minions at his disposal, and finding something that could heat the world proved to be a task that will most likely last about 50 posts and 3 pages.
-
That's when Mario ran to his microwave, he pulled out his secret ravioli he had saved up for years, ate it and became "SUPER MEGA FOOD POISENED MARIO!" he started a battle with Smoke Wario.
-
Smoke Wario just laughed, apparently not knowing the incredible power that Super mega Food Poisoned Mario had.
-
Meanwhile, Luigi was searching deep underground with the $500,000,000 digger Mario bought a while back in order to find a heat source.
-
Mario managed to wear down Wario by shooting flaming balls of ravioli at him, and Luigi eventually reached the core of Mushroom Earth, which had fallen fast asleep and needed to be awoken to restore the heat (Hey, everything on the surface is sentient, right?).
-
Meanwhile, The Chef and myself were still dueling, and the battle became so heated that the core of Mushroom Earth was jerked out of its much-needed sleep, causing Luigi to be incinerated.
-
Suddenly, the world's temperature was restored to normal, and Smoke Wario was no more, as he turned back into regular Wario and forgot that this mess ever happened.
-
However, everyone was suspicious when Wario was on fire while attending Luigi's funeral.
-
Wario was given 10 years on an uncharted island in Lethal Lava Land for trying to rob everyone while the world was in danger, but that day was remembered by all as the day Luigi made the ultimate sacrifice to save the entire world from eternal sub-zero, and even Bowser attended the funeral out of gratitude.
-
Ten years later, when someone went back for Wario, it was discovered that not only had he created a clone of Luigi, raised it as his own, and called it Waruigi, he had also adopted an Australian accent and a love for biker clothes.
-
Waluigi loved to dance (because Wario also loved to dance), but since everyone here is tired on dancing, it was considered irrelevant to the story, so the two went to a burger stand to celebrate the 10-year anniversary of what many call the "War that threw the world into nuclear winter and incinerated Luigi I."
-
But, due to a misunderstanding, the actual clone (with an R) was left on the uncharted island, which had recently become charted by Wario.
-
"Oops," said PaperLuigi, and Waruigi was sad that Wario had left him on the island.
-
After a few months, Wario started his own video game company and forgot he ever charted the uncharted island, so Waruigi began to go mad from loneliness, and started thinking he was being haunted by the ghost of the original Luigi.
-
Then, during a battle at Phillipi (don't ask), Waruigi saw the ghost of Luigi once again, and knew he was going to die soon.
-
Waruigi found a volleyball on the island and named him Wilson.
-
He then told the volleyball that he used to go to a doctor named Dr. Spalding.
-
Waruigi said that he really wanted a dentist because he had a terrible tooth ache...................then he went crazy and built a raft out of a porta-potty and wood.
-
Then he found a comma-shaped egg, hatched it, named the hatchling Molten, and had her eat Wilson's hair.
-
Wilson was sad that his hair was gone, and Waruigi dumped him over board for Molten.
-
Waruigi didn't realize that Molten had morphed into a floating volleyball because she ate the volleyball's hair, and would remain a volleyball for about 3 miles, when she would finish digesting the hair.
-
Eventually Waruigi got back to the Mushroom Kingdom, where he ran into Wario who was in desperate need of a tennis partner, as he was going to face Mario in a tennis match that afternoon.
-
However, neither Wario nor Waruigi were prepared to face Mario and Yoshi's mad tennis skills.
-
Naturally, Mario and Yoshi creamed Wario and Waruigi with tennis balls............when suddenly, E. Gadd whipped out the Necronomicon to bring back everyone's favorite green plumber.
-
This caused Waruigi to get extremely angry, as he was mad at Luigi for haunting him that whole time, so he decided to hatch a plot to show up at the Star Cup Tournament uninvited and challenge Luigi to a grudge match.
-
The grudge tennis match was kinda set up like this.............a regular tennis match with alligators on each sides of the court, a barb-wire net to keep the two from getting too close, land mines on the out-of-bounds area to encourage players to blow up their opponent (but if it fails they, of course, lose a point)............then the biggest catch of them all was the fact that the court was slowly being dropped into a crater of hot lava (the court was suspended by chains; every minute it dropped a few more feet)..........sooooooooo.....both players would die if they didn't complete the match in 10 minutes!
-
Just then... it happened.
-
The match began with Luigi's serve, while Waruigi returned the shot while dodging the alligators.
-
Volley after volley passed until Luigi scored a point with nine and half minutes left on the clock.
-
Waruigi was getting pretty angry with Luigi, so he prepared to use some cheap tactics to destroy him: Instead of wasting a point by hitting the tennis ball towards the mines, Waruigi threw some nearby rocks at the out-of-bounds area and laughed as Luigi tried to dodge the explosions!
-
Then Mario and Wario inexplicably teamed up to attempt to stop this deadly tennis match and save their brother and surrogate child, respectively.
-
So the Mario+Wario team made it a doubles match with 8 minutes left on the clock!
-
Wario, being the sneaky fellow that he is, wrapped Luigi and Waruigi up in twine, while Mario grabbed them and jumped off the stage, leaving Wario on the stage with 6 minutes to lose enough weight to jump off of the stage.
-
Wario began running aroung the court to lose weight, but he ran into land mines still resting on the out-of-bounds area (and alligators ate his fried remains) so Luigi and Waruigi punched Mario to continue the match on the dangerous court with 5 minutes and 49 secs left!
-
Then, 5 minutes and 50 seconds later, one of the three realized that they weren't on the deadly tennis court, but had resumed play on a regular tennis court nearby, which explained why they were still alive.
-
Eventually, the match was over and Luigi had beaten Waruigi, thus ending the tennis saga, but now Wario was dead, and Waruigi was heartbroken, so he vowed revenge against Mario and Luigi and dedicated the rest of his life to finding a way top bring Wario back to life.
-
But then, due to a strange twist in the plot involving Luigi beating his own teammate in tennis, Wario came back to life.
-
A milk truck ran over him, killing him instantly.
-
Then, because of SushieBoy not using a comma splice, and because miracles come in twos, Wario came back to life again.
-
Waruigi was happy that his "father" was back, but Waruigi discovered that because he (himself) was a clone, his genetic material was breaking down at an alarming rate.
-
So Wario had to find a way to keep Waruigi alive.
-
Wario joined Luigi, Mario and Yoshi to run over to "Skylab Genetics" and find a cure.
-
Once there, our heroes discovered that they, for some reason, had to find 120
Stars petri dishes to be able to obtain the cure.
-
"Gosh darn it, why does this always happen to me?" said Mario as he punched the wall.
-
When Mario removed his hand from the wall, the wall crumbled, revealing all 120 petri dishes; our four heroes obtained the cure, and managed to save Waruigi.
-
"Hooray!" said Waruigi.
-
Then the five people, Peach, and Bowser all went to get sushi or something.
-
The Sushi was poisoned, and they all died.
-
But they weren't dead; they had all fallen into comas.
-
Mario woke up after about 2 minutes, and Luigi after 5, but the others stayed in a coma for like...................50 years, dude!
-
Fortunately, due to a grave miscalculation, the 50 years were actually seconds, so they were awake before Mario and Luigi were; after all of this was done, everybody DANCED!
-
Then Count Bleck from Super Paper Mario came in and kidnapped Peach and Bowser.
-
But Count Bleck changed his mind and made a huge choice that only King Boo (and Bowser, like one time) has done in the past; he kidnapped Mario instead!
-
Which was kind of useless since he needed Peach and Bowser to get married to open the Chaos Heart, as in the plot of Super Paper Mario.
-
"Oops," said the Count as he tossed Mario out the window of a 40 story high building and caught Bowser and Peach.
-
Mario landed on a trampoline, he bounced back to the room and smacked Count Bleck.
-
Count Bleck offered Mario a cigarette, to which Mario refused and responded threateningly with a sack of potatoes.
-
The blow caused by a sack of potatoes to the head knocked Count Bleck unconscious.
-
Thus the universe was saved since Count Bleck never got the chance to arrange Bowser and Peach's wedding ceremony.
-
Count Bleck cried and went forth to the "Home for forgotten villians," where Smithy, Grodus and Crump all made their home.
-
So Mario and Luigi went over to the Tadpole Pond Juice Bar to get a couple o' tall, cold, KeroKero Colas.
-
Luigi rejected the Cola and sucked a Juice Box instead, but it was no ordinary juice box..........
-
It was filled with Chuck Norris!
-
Chuck Norris got out and ran off into the sunset, only to trip on a trampled Toad and fall down a cliff.
-
Everyone who ever got their butt kicked by Chucked laughed at him...........only to be killed when Chuck climbed back up the cliff and calmly punched their heads off with about .00000000000000000000000000000000001 % of his full power.
-
Just then...
-
I smacked GG upside the head for leaving us in a cliffhanger, while Luigi ate LOTSA' SPAGHETTI!
-
The spaghetti caused Luigi to become obese. :(
-
PaperLuigi was so tired of GG saying "just then" for about the 100th time, so he took a nap.
-
So Obese Luigi went to ask E.Gadd if he could build him a better exercise machine to work the weight off.
-
E. Gadd presented the "Fat-away 4068", but before Luigi could get on, he asked why Gadd had given the machine such an obscure number at the end.
-
Gadd said it was because he didn't actually invent it; it had been invented by one of his descendants in the year 4068, and had fallen through a time rift.
-
"Sweet," said Luigi, and he burned off the fat in about 2 seconds, much to the dismay of his friend Wario.
-
Seeing the major opportunity, Luigi worked out for 2 more seconds, and became Buff Luigi again!
-
Buff Luigi and Hot Daisy hooked up and began fighting crime for some reason.
-
They joined forces with Batman and Sailor Moon.
-
The four heroes then battled the Generic Evil Robots.
-
But since the robots were generic, they fell apart, and the four hero's decided to grab some................I dunno, socks?
-
The girls got tube socks while the guys got argyle socks.
-
They returned from getting their socks in their S.O.C.K. (Sub-Orbital Conveyance of the Kingdom).
-
That's when Batman got tired of riding S.O.C.K, so he rode his Batmobile instead, he drove off a cliff though.
-
So they had to replace him with Aquaman, who was really lame.
-
Aquaman forgot how to breathe out of water, so he died, Dolphins cried across the planet.
-
Sushieboy used another comma splice and the world exploded.
-
Suddenly, with some kind of uber magic, Mario and Chuck Norris replenished the world.
-
So Buff Luigi and Hot Daisy continued their date, while Mario, Chuck Norris, Mr.T, Sean Connery, and Maddox went to save some other universe in a manly manner.
-
But Buff Luigi nor hot Daisy were in a date, so they all exploded, that's when PL forgot to capitalize the "B", so he exploded.
-
But God put PL back together.
-
So while he had the chance, The Chef asked God for a chicken sandwich, while Buff Luigi and Hot Daisy finally went on a date.
-
God gave TC the biggest chicken sandwich............like, ever, and Buff Luigi plus Daisy continued the date.
-
Meanwhile, all over the world, food rained from the skies and nobody ever went hungry again.
-
But then, the world's greatest threat the universe had ever seen came back from the original Mario Story.............PEHG, the evil glass warrior that had tried to destroy the Mushroom Kingdom!!!
-
But then his good-natured brother DUDE came back to stop him!
-
Mario came and beat them both up for strealing his screen time.
-
And the little gray fat kid had two horrible brothers... oops, wrong story.
-
The little grey fat kid left, and then the two villians who were strealing (thats right, I said strealing) Mario's screen time left and went back to the first Mario story, which ended with grammar the gramcracker coming to save the day.
-
I exploded because of a misspelling of "graham cracker".
-
(Well, he's spelled "gramcracker because he's not really an actual graham cracker...........he's a grammar cracker) :P
Then GG was put back together by all the King's horses and stuff.
-
The entire wall toppled over them, killing them instantly, an airplane then crashed on top, killing the wall too.
-
Then Mario walked over to see what happened, as this was supposed to be a story about him.
-
Then the dead wall bounced back up and fell on Mario, killing him instantly.
-
Luigi came by and fed Mario a 1-up Mushroom, as this supposed to be a story and not another Endless Rock-Scissors-Paper.
-
"Errrr, you just made it look like one with reviving me and all." said Mario as he got up.
-
So Mario and The Chef decided to go on a road trip since they couldn't think of anything else to do.
-
Mario stopped at a truck stop, got some microwaveable ravioli, yawned, he gobbled it up.
-
"Mmm-mmm-mmm!" said Mario. "That's some goooood ravioli!"
-
Eventually night fell, and The Chef and Mario needed to find a place to sleep.
-
Mario slept on some rocks 'cause he couldn't find anything else.
-
The rocks didn't like being slept on, so they moved.
-
Mario continued down the road until he saw a chicken on fire.
-
The chicken on fire crossed the road to get to the other side.
-
He jumped into the lake on the other side of the road.
-
And then he died.
-
Mario swam into lake, he took the chicken out but he needed something to cook it on so he used The Chef's SPATULA.
-
Mario cooked about 50 chicken sandwiches out of that one chicken, and everyone had a good time at his "Chicken grill" party.
-
Except that everyone only consisted of Mario, The Chef, and a Coyote that The Chef generously gave one of the sandwiches to.
-
After about an hour or so, it started to get dark.
-
So they all went home.
-
Little did they know that the road was haunted.
-
King Boo had returned and was planning to put Mario and The Chef inside paintings.
-
And he did, so Luigi teamed up with PaperLuigi to save them.
-
They made a trip to King Boo's pad, but PaperLuigi wound up the victim of a paper shredder.
-
But PL was rescued by the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, who then beat the shredder without giving him any slack.
-
Luigi managed to snatch the paintings while King Boo wasn't looking, and took them back to E.Gadd's lab in order to turn Mario and The Chef back to normal.
-
That's when a terrible mistake had occured, Mario and The Chef were fused together, He called itself "Chefario!!"
-
PaperLuigi and Luigi fused together to form.........uh, PaperLuigiLuigi for no reason, and with Chefario, decided to beat the crap out of King Boo.
-
Then Masher101 walked up to PaperLuigiLuigi and wacked him in the face, over and over... until they split apart into PaperLuigi and Luigi.
-
Then Chefario wanted to unfuse as well, so he jumped off a building.
-
PaperLuigi punched Masher because he smacked him (how exactly slapping someone to unfuse them works is beyond me).
-
"Ow..." Said Masher101 as he got squished by Chefario.
-
PaperLuigi helped Masher up and put a band-aid over his head and said he was sorry for punching him.
-
But just then, a canadian guy named A Crazy Bear Named Joe jumped over the moon shouting "LOOK! A CHAIN CHOMP!!* But this time... it was TRUE!!! a giant chainchomp ate the A Crazy Bear Named Joe.
-
In an extremely desperate attempt to get unfused, Chefario jumped into the Chain Chomp's mouth, which was a bad idea, since it resulted in the Chain Chomp spitting out hundreds of tiny Marios and The Chefs.
-
All 100 Marios said very loudly, "MAMA MEIA!!!" it was so loud, it cracked everyones bones.
-
And they all swore a mighty swear.
-
Which caused all the tiny Marios to turn back into one regular-sized Mario, but the tiny The Chefs still needed a way to get back to normal.
-
so they used a fuse-O-matic to fuse together. But one of the 100 The Chefs ran off a cliff before the fuse!
-
So when the MiniChefs were fused back together, The Chef had a pinky toe missing.
-
So he went to the hospital to get prosthetic toe.
-
But this toe, was made of Jell-O. So TheChef ate it. Meanwhile, the little TheChef was...
-
At a job interview, as was trying to make a new name for himself, instead of just "Mini-The Chef No. 97".
-
He finaly got the name "Masher102" But was saddly sued by me, forty seconds after doing it.
-
The battle in court lasted only 3 seconds however, because a giant alligator ate away the wall.
-
Nearby was a strange-smelling man in a Spider-Man outfit; the alligator decided to take him on in a one-on-one duel.
-
That guy from YuGHiOh appeared and Smelly Spiderman Dude and the alligator kicked his but outta there.
-
Then YUGI from (YuGiOh!!) Came and forced "that one guy from YuGHOh" To a card match.
-
Yugi won and "that guy" was never heard from again, while The Chef, in an effort to find a new toe, ended up getting infected with a symbiote that made him act emo.
-
Glorb, swearing vengeance on The Chef for no particular reason, became The New Glorb and flew around on a magic snowboard, wreaking havoc on the citizens of New Jersey.
-
PaperLuigi fell into a strange particle accelerator thing and got mutated with some nearby sand, thus becoming PaperSandman (all while The New Glorb and SymbioteChef were fighting it out).
-
So The Chef fought both Glorb 2 and PaperSandMan, but sooner or later The Chef's old nemesis Fuzzy, who had also gotten infected by the symbiote, joined in the fight under the name "Toxin".
-
PaperSandman began to slap some sand into Toxin's eyes because he was being a huge jerk.
-
The New Glorb cornered The Chef and was about to call him a mean name, when suddenly, a huge...thing appeared!
-
A giant noodle arrived and squished a local bakery.
-
"Um...whatever," said the four as they all continued to fight each other.
-
Little did they know that the thing and the noodle were conspiring to destroy them all!
-
The Noodle, one of The Chef's old supervillains, was angry at Ram Saimi for not giving him a role in The Chef 3, and The Huge Thing was angry since was never even notified of a The Chef movie franchise at all.
-
The noodle took out a few katanas and threw them at PaperSandman and Toxin!
-
The kataknas were made out of processed cheese, which did little to the Toxin, but PaperSandMan was allergic and he dies!
-
PaperSandMan, who has never been allergic to cheese........ever in his life, doesn't die.
-
Suddenly, Glorb's magical flying snowboard ran out of pixie dust, and Glorb plummeted to the earth; he later woke up in an operating room, with four huge tentacles coming out of his back.
-
"Oh crap," said PaperSandman, "he's become......uh.......Dr. OctoGlorb!"
-
Suddenly, PaperSandMan fell though some... random hole. Into a de-acellerator thing. He became PaperLuigi again. But just then, symbiote mutated PaperLuigi... into... his evil... ALTER EGO...
(Bet you were expecting this...)
The Green Thunder...
MrL!!
So Dr. OctoGlorb and MrL joined forces, and terrorized the town, when...
-
Some fat dude in a plastic bag sprang out of nowhere and said "Raggle Fraggle," and Mr. L laughed at him.
-
But when the fat dude removed the plastic bag... HE WAS REVEALED TO BE...
End Boss!!!
The baddest, evilest, most hard to beat boss ever!
-
End Boss slapped the symbiote off of Mr. L and he was turned back into PL!!
-
But just then, the symboiote morphed into a silloueted version of PaperLuigi!
-
The symbiote found a few cells from The Chef's symbiote/suit and latched itself to PaperLuigi again, mixing itself with his blood cells, thus creating the serial killer known as PaperCarnage!
-
At which point The Chef blurted out, "Quit spoiling the plot of The Chef 4 you fool!".
-
PaperCarnage tried to eat The Chef to change the plot of The Chef 4, but he failed when that giant noodle came back to fight some more.
-
The giant noodle turned out to be a boss from the Player's Choice game Jman's Grand Adventure.
-
Then The Noodle came in told the Giant Noodle that he was in the wrong place.
-
Suddenly, Masher101 ran in holding another noodle, with "Kill You Five Times Noodle" ingraved in red. "DIE!!!" Said Masher101, as he slapped the Giant Noodle, PaperCarnage, a guy named Joe, and End Boss killing each of them five times, which made them lose all 5 of their lives.
-
But a lone mushroom found it's way over to PaperCarnage's body and brought him back to life, and he decided to fight Masher for breaking the "add more than one sentences" rule.
-
After relising this, Masher101 was slain by himself.
-
Everyone went to his funeral and dropped flowers on his grave.
-
But suddenly, Masher101 was revived, except it was because of the symbiote! So Masher101 became...
Masher202! With the evil force of the Symbiote, Masher202 challanged PaperCarnage
-
Suddenly, the Spiderman saga ended and the story restarted because Sonic the Hedgehog renamed the thread "A Sonic Story: You Add ONE Sentence to the Tale," which made Mario very angry.
-
So he decided to challenge him....at the Olympic Games!
-
But since the Olympics didn't happen for another year, they had to wait; it the mean time, Sonic trained (for the olympics) by running 50000 laps around a 1 mile track everyday, while Mario sat on his fat butt and watched soap operas while eating chips and ice cream.
-
Sonic again disintegrated before the Olympics cause of the extreme heat.
-
But some dude brought him back to life to avoid trailing away from the plot, which was Sonic vs. Mario in the olympics.
-
"What plot?" Another dude asked, "there has never been any plot here and there never will!"
-
The story carried on despite the dude's rant, and a very fat Mario met an extremely fit Sonic at the 2008 Summer Olympics for the ultimate showdown!
-
In an attempt to stop PL's nigh endless storm of fat jokes, The Chef fed Mario a Weight-Reducing Mushroom, which made him physically fit in nothing flat.
-
Then I wondered how eating mushrooms is supposed to make you fit.
-
PL told SB that it is possible to lose weight on shrooms, if that's all you eat.
-
Because it was from the Mushroom Kingdom, and we all know dang well that it hosts a variety of mushrooms with odd effects, so Sonic ate a Quill-strengthening Mushroom to make his quills stronger.
-
So basically, they were both taking illegal enhancements/mushrooms/steroids/whatever you want to call it...........but before they could get tested, they had to go through the opening ceremony(of the olympics), which began with Peach singing the Kingdom's National Anthem.........very badly.
-
And Daisy laughed a mighty laugh and the sky fell.
-
The laugh made everyone's ears bleed.
-
Since everyone's ears were bleeding, the officials decided to skip the 'roids test and go straight to the competition.
-
Meanwhile, a shadowy figure was watching in the sidelines.
-
The figure placed a very small device (nearly micro) that read "danger" onto the back of a bystander and moved away; meanwhile, the first race between Luigi, Tails and about 10 other racers was about to begin!
-
"Let me remind you that there is to be no biting, slapping, gnawing, chewing, riding, or lathe-ing your opponent in the field of play," the announcer told the racers.
-
All while Eggman was biting Mario's eye (ironically, he was on Sonic's team), so he got disqualified.
-
And so he sulked the day away.
-
By eating 3 buckets of triple layer chocolate ice cream; meanwhile, the remaining racers (which included Mario, Luigi, Wario, Vivian, Yoshi and Waluigi for Mario's team and Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Amy, Shadow and Rouge for Sonic's team) all lined up at the starting point and waited for the ref. to start the race!
-
Hey guys, sorry for the bump (and the double post), but I don't want to be the last guy to post in this topic. I'm already the last guy to post in the first one! Please don't let this die.
-
Lakitu and Omochao both held up a traffic light, which turned red, then amber, then green, which signified the start of the race.
-
Sonic dashed right out of the start while Mario ran at about 2 miles per hour with everyone else at different spots!
CURRENT PLACES:
1. Sonic
2. Tails
3. Luigi(hooked on extreme mushrooms)
4. Wario (had a bag of money in front of his face)
5. Shadow
6. Knuckles
7. Amy
8. Waluigi
9. Yoshi
10. Rouge
11. Vivian
12. Mario at dead last
-
and out of nowhere, sephiroth takes out Wario!!
-
PaperLuigi ignored the off topic comment as Wario jumped ahead of Tails!
-
Which was impossible because he had to jump over Luigi first, out of anger, Luigi attacked Wario, both were disqualified for fighting!
-
"Ah man," said Mario as he was down 2 team members!
Rankings:
1. Sonic (3rd lap)
2. Tails (2nd lap)
3. Shadow (2nd lap)
4. Waluigi (picked up the pace with his long legs and is on the 2nd lap)
5. Amy (2nd lap)
6. Vivian (2nd lap)
7. Rouge (had to stop and put on make up on and is on the 2nd lap)
8. Knuckles (found an emerald piece and stopped because Eggman told him to and is on the 1st lap)
9. Yoshi (got hungry and stopped on 1st lap)
10. Mario (dead last, 1st lap)
-
Tendo Was mad Mario was losing so he started booing and throwing popcorn at the Racers
-
He threw a banana peel at the track, that's when Rouge slipped on it, and crashed into Knuckles, they then rolled down a cliff and exploded, two more down!
-
1. Sonic
2. Tails
3. Shadow
4. Amy
5. Waluigi
6. Vivian
7. Yoshi
8. Mario
Sonic and Tails were confident that the race belonged to team Sonic, so Tails slowed down to attack Team Mario's last chance: Waluigi!
-
Tendo Said "that was too cool" and Shot a Nerf Dart and it Hit Yoshi, but It didn't affect him
-
Tails began to smack Waluigi in the face, but Waluigi kept on running, waiting for Tails to be disqualified.
-
But it never came, so Waluigi shoved a muffin down Wario's throat to shut him up, since he had taunted Waluigi about losing.
-
But since the race wasn't over, Waluigi failed to do this.
-
Meanwhile, Peach was listening to A Horse with No Name, which was so terrible, she dug her brains out with a spoon.
-
Then, someone told Peach to acquire some taste in music, as her favorite song of all time was "This is why I'm hot."
-
That someone was actually Wario, who was cheering on his brother Waluigi in the race.
1. Sonic (5th lap)
2. Shadow (4th lap)
3. Waluigi (on his 4th lap; he is ahead of both Tails and Amy, who are both taking shots at his legs)
4. Tails (4th lap, kicking Waluigi in the legs)
5. Amy (4th lap, kicking Waluigi in the legs)
6. Vivian (3rd)
7. Yoshi+Mario ( 2nd lap, both have teamed up, Mario is riding on Yoshi's back)
-
Tails tripped on one of his tails, and crashed into Amy, they both skidded crazily into a wall and died, while Mario and Yoshi were catching up!
-
"This is a highly disturbing race," said Wario as he took a bite out of his sandwich.
1. Sonic (Lap 7)
2. Shadow (5th lap)
3. Waluigi (5th lap)
4. Vivian (4th lap)
5. Mario+Yoshi (4th lap, going faster)
-
Shadow used Chaos Control to pull ahead of Sonic, but Chaos Controlled too far away and ended up in the middle of Alaska.
-
"Well that sucks," said Sonic, as Waluigi crossed the finish line an 8th time, moving as fast as he could.
1. Sonic (9th lap)
2. Waluigi (8th lap, catching up fast)
3. Mario + Yoshi (6th lap)
4. Vivian (6th lap)
-
Shadow went on and on about how he was the ultimate creature, but no one could hear him.
-
Vivian stopped and said "Wait, Why am I here? I was just a partner in PM2, Team Mario could've used someone else like Toad or DK," She vanished seconds later.
-
So it was down to Sonic and Waluigi, both on the final lap, neck and neck, blah blah blah...all the while a race official was using the Necronomicon to bring back everyone who died to compete in the next event: weight lifting!
1. Sonic
2. Waluigi
3. Yoshi and Mario.
-
Shadow Chaos Controlled back into the race, just in time to slam into Yoshi and Mario, knocking all three of them out and taking them out of the running! :o
-
"My God!" someone shouted.
-
Then, the moon exploded.
-
chunks of the moon crashed into earth, making it explode as well.
-
"Wow, no more Mushrooms for me" thought Mario waking up from a really bad dream.
-
Suddenly, Dimentio appeared right in front of Mario's face!
-
And then disappeared suddenly.
-
Mario got a lighter and burned all his mushrooms...
-
Which was a waste, since they were perfectly good portabellos and not drugs of any kind.
-
But Mario thought so, he then went to find his brother Luigi
-
Luigi said drugs weren't really his thing, so he ate a ham salad.
-
Little did he know, that "ham salad" was filled to the brim with opium thanks to the generous added supplements from Wario.
-
But It had no effect on Luigi, Instead he decided to go to the Bob-omb shop...
-
He threw one of them near Wario's face, which exploded in his face, ripping off all his skin which scarred him for life.
-
Waluigi was very upset when he found out his brother had been scarred by Luigi, so he decided to get revenge by teaming up with O'Chunks.
-
O'Chunks did nothing to help Waluigi, except that he sat on him on accident.
-
Waluigi almost died, and O'Chunks (feeling sorry for him) had to take him to the ER.
-
Where on the way he got run over by a Mini Mario Truck.
-
This obviously caused both of them great pain, and as a result O'Chunks ordered two rooms at the ER, one for him and the other for Waluigi.
-
When Waluigi relized it was Dr Mario that was going to fix him...
-
He got up from his bed and threw himself out the window because he had a Dr. Mario phobia.
-
But Dr Mario threw a pill that hit Waluigi in the head and groin...
-
Waluigi couldn't find a pill for that pain.
-
He then got cut into two by a flying disk thrown by Shy Guys who then
-
(It's add one sentence, not half a sentence btw)
The Shy Guys were killed by an angry Donkey Kong who leaped into the air and crushed them.
-
So Optimus Prime came by and delivered a truckload of Super Bananas to calm him down.
-
Which then landed on Waluigi.
-
But Waluigi lifted up the truck with his bare hands after eating a huge eggplant, his favorite food.
-
Then the Eggplant power was gone before Waluigi noticed what happened, he got crushed by the truck!
-
So Waluigi went to you-know-where because he was a bad person in life.
-
Then Optimus Prime changed from his truck form back into his robot form because he saw what appeared to be a helicopter bearing the Decepticon symbol flying nearby.
-
Which was dropping off precious cargo from UNICEF to the needy.
-
The needy children then started to buy Transformers toys!
-
It turned out that it was all a plan set by Megatron to exploit the needy children in an effort to find the heap of Energon buried in the Earth's crust!
-
Megatron then recieved Energon and used it to get a free hamburger at McDonalds.
-
Upon trying to get the free hamburger, Megatron learnt that the offer involving Energon only lasted until 10am, and it was 10:01am; Megatron was most upset.
-
So Starscream advised Megatron to just steal the burger and use the Energon to convert the burger into a weapon that would destroy the Autobots once and for all!
-
But Megatron said "Nah," and went to Burger King instead, where an identical offer ran to 11am.
-
But to his surprise, Optimus Prime and the rest of the Autobots were there, celebrating their latest victory over the Deceptions, which made Megatron angry enough to attack Optimus Prime from behind.
-
Then a bunch of other people like Mario, Sonic the Hedgehog, The Undertaker, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Dr. Wily, Cloud, Frank West and Godzilla burst through the window and everyone started brawling, including Optimus Prime and Megatron!
-
This resulted in an event called Huge Fight Game, which was forgotten and told to never be remembered.
-
But unfortunatly, someone had a big mouth.
-
So the fight continued with Captain Kirk getting choked out by Darth!
-
Then, Chuck Norris jumped into the fight.
-
Chuck laid a super kick to the face Cloud, knocking him out cold.
-
Sonic was getting jabbed by Mario, "Aww, that's NO GOOD!" Sonic said between blows, "No, this is GOOD!" Mario shot back.
-
However, while the fight was going on, Dr. Mike Smutco from the Adler Planitarium was trying to take over the world with a telescope.
-
Then when all seemed like "The Ultimate Showdown 2.0", it was discovered that Unicron was heading towards our galaxy, so Mario went to stop the fight between Optimus Prime and Megatron...
-
At that moment, someone spilled acid tea on Unicron, causing him/her/it(I know precisely squat about Transformers and the like!) to melt; the fight continued.
-
After everyone realised that Unicron melted, Optimus Prime, Megatron, the other Autobots, and the Decepticons ran away to their home in another planet somewhere else; stopping the fight at the same time.
-
Because the Unicron that supposedly melted was really a holographic projection made by Bowser, who was trying to stall the Autobots while the real Unicron was preparing to absorb Cybertron and everyone on it!
-
Everyone got absorbed into Unicron, but the only problem was that Optimus, and the other Autobots attacked Unicron, destroying him.
-
"So how many times have the Autobots and Unicron been destroyed?" Waluigi asked.
-
"About 10 million times," replied Sonic, who was running away from the giant robot battle between Tails and Dr.Eggman.
-
Since there's only supposed to be one of Unicron in all the Transformers universes,his destruction caused a black hole to form, resulting in the story overlapping with Transformers: Cybertron, which made The Chef kind of annoyed.
-
Forgetting about all of that, all of the Fungi Forum members went on a walk.
-
"Look!" said Toad. "A Chain Chomp!"
-
Then The Chef threw Kimmaru off a cliff for setting up yet another occurrence of that infamous running gag.
-
Mario pulled down his pants and farted a mighty fart, and the Chain Chomp died. :)
-
So Bowser sent his next best thing, a Boom Boom.
-
The Boom Boom tired to crush Mario but it failed.
-
Kimimaru crashed right into the Boom Boom from above, after he fell from the cliff The Chef threw him off of.
-
Luigi yawned a mighty yawn because he was tired.
-
Luigi then fell asleep.
-
Luigi was woken up by Waluigi.
-
Waluigi punched Luigi in the face because he ate his lettuce, tomato, and ketchup sandwhich.
-
Luigi tossed Waluigi into the Wrestling ring and the two went at it with some steel chairs!
-
The match ended with the most dramatic finisher in wrestling history, a flying press off the top rope which somehow resulted in both men being KO'd, and one laying motionless on top of the other for the win.
-
Luigi stood up as he held the United States title, HIS title, in his hands; Waluigi was left bloody and motionless in the ring.
-
It was for that reason, that Waluigi did not get a character spot in the next Mario spinoff, Super Mario Wrestling, and instead they were forced to bring back Foreman Spike from Wrecking Crew to take his place.
-
Waluigi was so angry about this that he hit Foreman Spike with another steel chair, busting him open and stealing back his spot!
-
But since he did this for real and not within the context of the MWF (Mushroom Wrestling Federation)'s plotline, he was arrested for assualt, so Stanley from Donkey Kong 3 ended up in Foreman Spike's place.
-
Waluigi sat in prison as he watched Sonic "battle" Kirby for the MWF Cruiserweight championship on T.V.
-
Cranky and Diddy Kong went undercover for the inside scoop and learned that SSB Live was going to be renewed for one more season.
-
Except the president of the SSB Live company, Jman, wasn't set to make too many appearances, which made some of the fans sad.
-
So the fans cried.
-
But Lady Peach came out and cheered the fans up by telling them that Deezer would be there, replacing Jman when he couldn't be there!
-
The fans cheered exuberantly as Deezer appeared before them in all his majesty.
-
He then announced the next match!
-
Before he could finish, he got tackled down by Koopa Koopa Football players!
-
So Scorpion and Sub-Zero jumped into the ring and hit the football players with a huge ladder!
-
Then Deezer came over and fed all of them bread.
-
Everyone began to throw up (because the bread had mold on it) so some guy fed everyone popcorn and peanuts.
-
They all threw up because they were all allergic to peanuts and Lady Peach came over and gave them buckets.
-
GiftedGirl then realized that everyone who had posted on this page had a custom title.
-
Then everyone who had a CT (who posted on this page) died a horrible and painful death, except for Pt_Peach, GiftedGirl and SushieBoy.
-
And then I broke the streak.
-
I started to mug Jman with an umbrella.
-
I mugged SushiBoy with an umbrella for mugging Jman with an umbrella, thus causing a portal in between dimensions that we all went into; we were trapped with the Tilley Tubbies.
-
"Oh no," screamed PL. "This sucks!"
-
"Let's sing a song," said the horrible Tilly Tubbies.
-
*bump*
Luigi appeared in a ninja outfit and began to slice up the Tilly Tubbies with a huge sword!
-
"Oh, no!" said the Tilly Tubbies; meanwhile, Bowser fell from the sky!
-
And landed right on the Tilly Tubbies...killing them instantly.
-
"What a nightmare," said Wario as he awoke from a dream.
-
Wario tossed himself right out of bed, but to find himself in Mario's house.
-
"I'm confused", said Wario.
-
"Don't worry...we all are," said Yoshi as he put on a bee costume.
-
Yoshi flew around into the bee hive and told the bees to attack Sonic.
-
Since Sonic was faster than the speed of sound, he killed all the bess without getting hit even once.
-
And then Wario (still wearing Mario's shoes) stole all the bees' honey.
-
Wario licked all the honey off of his fingers, got stung by like 33 bees, and then had a heart attack!
-
The heart attack had the ambulence come; also causing all the other characters to show up!
-
Waluigi was worried that his brother wouldn't make it, but then he remembered that Wario stole his game idea (Waluigi Ware: Mega Micro games), so he laughed when Wario screamed out in pain.
-
Yoshi all of a sudden ate that delicious piece of fruit that Waluigi was saving for his birthday!
-
Then Waluigi got run over by the ambulance.
-
But he survived and was rebuilt as a cyborg.
-
He died again as he was pelted mercilessly by cattle dung.
-
Waluigi went to heaven and never died again.
-
Unfortunately, Heaven was under repair, so he dropped into The Planet,
causing Wario's head to explode.
-
Wario's body ran rampant!
-
"Look," said Toad. "This story is really getting out of hand, and gosh darn it, if I see another chain chomp run by the castle, I'll eat my hat."
-
"What hat?" said Wario's disembodied head.
-
"The one on my head," said Toad as he ate his hat.
-
It's too bad that Jerold from "Hey Arnold" blew up Toad's Castle!
-
Then everyone wondered why Jerald was there.
-
Suddenly, Jerald revealed himself to be Bowser Jr. in disguise, but before he could do another evil deed, Toad asked how he got a castle in the first place.
-
Then Bowser Jr. grew up, becoming Bowser Sr.!
-
He then turned to dust, some particles got into Toad's eyes, he ran around crazily and knocked Peach down a cliff!
-
"This sucks!" shouted Peach.
-
"You have it easy!" said a hammer brother as he was falling down a huge cliff Ash Katchum pushed him off of.
-
Wario then pushed Ash of a cliff and watched as he fell 500 feet to the bottom.
-
Culex then popped in from
The Final Fantasy universeVanda!
-
A huge battle began (Everyone of the mushroom kingdom vs Culex) for the fate of the universe!
-
The Mushroom Kingdom won, but Culex only had one Quartz Charm to give out. So...
-
Then Peach climbed back up the mountain, looking rather disheveled.
-
Ash climbed back up too and screamed at Wario for pushing him off.
-
Ash saw Culex and ran over with his Master Ball held high, mistaking the dark knight for a Pokemon.
-
Wario screamed in terror when Ash unleashed Culex on him.
-
Wario tried to escape but Waluigi wouldn't let him.
-
Then Link came along and shot an arrow through everyone's hats.
-
"Aw darn, I wanted to nail Wario in the head," said Link after Wario stood up.
-
The statement was undermined when Culex crushed both Wario and Link.
-
"Holy spit!" screamed Waluigi and Ash.
-
As Waluigi tried to hide, Ash cried out, "CULEX! USE DARK STAR, NOW!"
-
Culex ignored Ash and fried both him and Waluigi with a huge fire ball thing.
-
Then Link escaped and stabbed all of Ash's Pokemon.
-
Then he got hit in the nose with a football.
-
Then, Culex took the football, and started a giant game of Mario Strikers, Vanda VS. the Mushroom Kingdom.
-
Then a bomb dropped and everyone died.
By the way, why isn't the original A Mario Story: you add one sentence to the tale used anymore?
-
Then everyone turned into zombies.
-
So they had a feast of human flesh.
-
Then Megaman showed up and blasted all of them to smithereens
-
"Yeah!" said Gutsman as he threw a rock.
-
Then Gutsman's butt showed up in a million different places and Megaman got mad because it covered the face of the Mona Lisa.
-
Megaman then blasted butt and then swooned over the sight of the beautiful Mona Lisa.
-
And Gutsman screamed bloody murder...because he had just been subjected to 43 hours of Hannah Montana reruns.
-
Now all Mega Man had to do was take care of Fire Man, Ice Man, Elec Man, Bomb Man, Cut Man, Time Man and Oil Man.
-
"Ah crap," said Megaman as he loaded his health bar with E-tanks (which didn't exist since he was playing in the first game).
-
"STOP! YOU ARE NOT NINTENDO CHARACTERS!" cried Shirugei Miyamoto himself as he crushed Megaman and the other robots.
-
Then Mario came in and saved them, as he was rebelling against his own creator for lying to the people about his image, after which he asked Megaman if wanted to join the Justice League of Nintendo.
-
Which had been around for years, just that no one would join it, Megaman then rejected the offer because he felt weird about teaming up with another company.
-
So Miyamoto, combating Mario's rebellion, used his creator powers to wipe Mario off the face of the planet! But Luigi traveled back in time, to save his brother...
-
He grabbed a mallet and bashed Miyamoto on the head.
-
Little did Luigi know the consequences. Miyamoto was dead before he created Mario, and the resulting time paradox trapped every single character he created in the End of Time!
-
So the other members of the the Justice League of Nintendo had to find a way to warp there so they could save Mario, Link, Cranky Kong and Captain Olimar from the evil Anti-NES!
-
The Anti-Nes was led by none other than Sonic the Hedgehog!
-
Meanwhile, formerely retired member Mr. Game and Watch took command of the JLN and assembled his forces: Kirby, Samus, Yoshi, Pit, Peach, the Ice Climbers, Kirby, Meta Knight, Ash, Captain Falcon, Fox and Falco
-
Then the Ice Climbers smashed Sonic the Hedgehog with their mighty hammers.
-
Sonic got back up and sawed the Ice Climbers in half with his mighty spin dash.
-
Meanwhile, Mr. Game and Watch studied time travel and discovered there are three ways to get to the End of Time: Create a time paradox that would cause you to stop existing, attempt time travel with four or more people, each from different time periods, and it is a accessible destination on SOME time machines.
-
He wondered why it was possible that people were getting away with having more than one sentence in the "add ONE sentence" story.
-
(I made it one, so we can get back to the story now.)
But he was amushed by Sonic's right-hand man, Alex Kidd!
-
Captain Falcon SMASHES Alex Kidd in the head so hard with his knee that Alex Kidd fell into another dimension that only had plants who dance and eat staples.
-
Alex Kidd was transformed into a staple, so he was eaten.
-
Mr. Game-and-Watch then noticed that Mario's time machine didn't have an "End of Time" setting, he'd have to use another option to get there!
EDIT: 100 PAGES!
-
So, he consulted the all-but-forgotten instruction manual.
-
He decided he'd have to attempt time travel with four or more people from different time periods.
-
His head swelled up to the size of the Great Pumpkin because of all the stress.
-
So he googled the words 'Relaxing Breaks' and booked a 3 day stress reduction course.
-
Mario showed up and said "Hey! What-a happened to-a your head-a?!"
-
Unfortunatley, Mario was pulled back into the End of Time by Gaspar. (One of the bibical Wise Men. It's a long story.)
-
Casper hit Gasper with a magazine ad about food.
-
Gaspar attacked by throwing his bowler hat, that happened to contain millions of Bob-Ombs. (Don't ask me why a bibical Wise Man has a bowler hat filled with Bob-Ombs)
-
Suddenly Oddjob appeared from nowhere and presented Gaspar with a lawsuit for unlawfully using his trademark move.
-
But then, Kung Lao appeared to argue with Oddjob about who the move really belongs to!
-
Ermac declared his moves the best and blasted them both.
-
Gaspar got tired of this, and created a time portal, which sucked everyone into the End of Time.
-
In the End of Time, there was a man who knew the road, and the writing was written on stone.
-
The only other things there were a porch, a lamppost, a doorframe, and several mysterious shiny things.
-
A flock of magpies came and stole the shiny things, before anyone could find out what they were.
-
Then there was a knock at the door frame.
-
Kimimaru opened the door and there was a giant elephant bigger than the world.
-
The elephant made a deal to teach everyone how to preform magic if they all ran around in circles three times.
-
Then a man with a squid for a face smashed into a window that appeared out of nowhere for no reason whatsoever.
-
ㅤ ㅤ
-
Just then a black hole opened up and swallowed everything.
-
Then Mr.Toadsworth got blown up for posting more than one sentence, but he was swallowed up into a black hole anyway so it didn't matter.
-
ㅤ ㅤ
-
And then we stopped flaming each other (it is against the rules) and the story started over, because it's not really going anywhere after a black hole forms:
Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad went for a walk.
-
ㅤ ㅤ
-
(Dude, is it just me, or are some people abusing the "add one sentence" rule?)
"All this sounds very disgusting," said PaperLuigi.
-
"Look, a Chain Chomp!" screamed Toad nonsensically, but he was right; a Chain Chomp was fast approaching, barking in such a manner that Luigi ran away.
-
Then Donkey Kong fought with the Chain Chomp.
-
And Wario sold tickets to the fight and got rich.
-
Waluigi stole Wario's money and drove away in a taxi while the Chain Chomp ate Donkey Kong's leg!
-
Then Toad's Brain Imploded for No Reason
-
MegaSonic escaped from jail and stole my breakfast.
-
But King XYZ says that wasn't MegaSonic, but Chain Chomp!
-
Then the narrator popped up from a hole in the ground and said "The End" because personally he thought the story was very idiotic.
-
So then Waluigi came out of nowhere and threw a rock at Toad's head before he could say "Look, a chain chomp."
-
Toad then reacted by sucker punching Waluigi in the crotch, because frankly he deserved it.
-
Out of nowhere, a white hole opened, causing everything from the previous plotline to come flying out!
-
So then, the trees started to shake.
-
Giant dragons flew out of the trees and burned all of the grass in Kimimaru's backyard.
-
Mario came in and requested that every post try to stick to the plot line of the post before it.....
-
...went out of hand after Friendly's sued Mcdonalds.
-
Meanwhile, the internet was reaching CRITICAL MASS!
-
Then everything we know and love exploded! But Lizard Dude got away in time and went to work for Nintendo but then got fired for eating shrooms in his office. So he wanted revenge on Nintendo and vowed one day he would return with a copy of Hotel Mario.
-
Suddenly, before everybody's eyes, there was a post with more than one sentence, so they called a robot powered by a Twin Turbo-9000 SP5 Kung-Fu Titanium/Lithium Alloy Processor, which was built into a virtually indestructible Flexo-Growmonic endoskeleton that had the power to punch through cinder blocks, crush steel in its vice-like grip and plow mercilessly through poorly written run-on sentences, while also being capable of slicing bagels.
-
Then Mario said that he and Luigi had to find the princess and that YOU had to help them, but you refused so they stole all your bread.
-
Mario and Luigi ate the bread and threw a dog at Toad, then Sonic came and ran Bowser over with the Blue Falcon he stole from Lord Voldemort (you-know-who).
-
Then Toad turns around and tries to punch out bowser because he thought he throw the dog. But failed because he was much smaller then bowser.
-
So then Bowser set Toad on fire and took off.
-
Bowser went to the bathroom, but there was a huge line approximately 50 miles long, plus the person on the toilet had no toilet paper left, and someone went to the grocery store to get some.
-
Bowser waited for about ten minutes until the person who went to the grocery store came back, The guy in the stall was mad because he got Quilted Northern and not Charmin Ultra.
-
So he enlisted Bowser's help to fry the poor guy that was responsible for the mix-up.
-
After frying the guy, Bowser went to Australia, where there are never any lines, to go to the bathroom.
-
Bowser was a bit constipated and actually ended up creating a line by taking too long to go to the bathroom (about 6 or 7 days).
-
The Australians got annoyed at this, so they called Toad's mobile phone.
-
Toad flew into the bathroom and slammed headfirst into Bowser's spiky shell.
-
The spike sank into his forehead and he began bleeding.
-
So he asked the little medical gnome housed inside the Wii to come out and bandage his wound.
-
The gnome jumped out and tried to help Toad; meanwhile, Bowser's back was broken and no one seemed to care!
-
Except Kammy Koopa, who managed to magically heal Bowser's back, and turn it metal in the process, thus making Bowser's bac twice as powerful as before!
-
Then the Star Fox team showed up to aid Toad in killing Bowser, who had a much stronger back.
-
Just then, Star Wolf showed up...
-
Peppy told Fox to do a barrel roll for some reason while Slippy screamed like an 8 year old girl.
-
Wolf then yelled out, "Can't let you do that, Star Fox!" and shot down Fox's Arwing, causing Slippy to scream even harder until his head exploded.
-
Fox got out of his Arwing just in time, then Falco told him that he sucked, which caused Krystal to eat Slippy's body for some reason.
-
So Fox killed Krystal and punched Falco in the eye.
-
Fox then had to defend himself against the onslaught of Krystal fanboys who came after him in a bloody rage.
-
Fox began to blow them away with a shotgun while Peppy ran around and ate grass.
-
Peppy ate sheep grass, and became a sheep, which made Fox get distracted.
-
fox drove into a worm hole and came out the princess's toleit
-
while cosmic_c was trying to get the story back to mario >:-(
-
Fox then stole all the valuables from Peach's Castle and ran away.
-
A drunken Falco crashed his LandMaster Tank on Fox, they both died in the horrible explosion that followed.
-
"Boy, so many people just end up dying in these stories," said Toad, who was promptly eaten by a Chain Chomp.
-
Leon Powalski, swooping down in his modified ship, the Rainbow Delta, unleashed a barrage of Hyper Lasers on the Chain Chomp, blowing it to smithereens and revealing a very frightened Toad, who then farted a mighty fart.
-
"Hey, I'm supposed to do that!" screamed Mario who then farted a mighty fart, creating one big fart with Toad's fart, which fused with Pigma's fart and Wario's fart!
-
then those farts killed almost everyone in a 5-mile radius
-
then Chuck norris came and confronted mario.
-
Mario explained the situation and then Chuck Norris left and went after you!
-
i ran away.
-
The Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the air at the same time Captain Falcon did a FALCON PUNCH thus causing a rupture in the space time continuum and in turn restarting the story.
-
okay, mario was walking down the street when....
-
"Look!" said Toad. "A Chain Chomp!"
-
"Look!" said Mario. "I'ma gonna kill you for-a saying that to much-a!"
-
Mario pulled down his pants and farted a mighty fart and the Chain Chomp died.
-
Toad exploded for no apparent reason.
-
Then everyone started playing SMB.
-
mario got a game over on the first goomba.
-
So Luigi took his turn and beat the game in under ten minutes.
-
Then he got a kiss from Peach and was told he'd have to try his hand at super extreme hard mode.
-
After losing at super extreme hard mode, everyone ran away and ate cheeseburger macaroni, which is contaminated like crazy!
-
The total grams of fat in the "Burger" made toad explode for no apparent reason again.
-
Wario ate Toad's remains and then was arrested for being a cannibal.
-
Deezer sets Toad free.
-
"Um...Toad is already dead," explained Luigi.
-
"But the Dragon Balls were used to revive him," said the Eternal Dragon.
-
"Ah, you're right," said Wario, who used the last wish for immortality.
-
Then, out of absolutely nowhere, every Mario character started fighting in a giant brawl again!
-
Pokemon Trainer, Fox, Sonic and Snake joined in and bystanders began to watch and cheer for their favorite characters; then God said "And it shall be called Super Smash Brothers: Brawl."
-
So Tabuu showed up, enslaved the ROBs and Ancient Minister, then set out deploy Subspace Bombs all over the Smash World.
-
Mario and Kirby were fighting it out in some kinda stadium while this was happening, and Mario ended up winning after he turned Kirby into a trophy.
-
Mario was then presented with the Super Smash Bros championship belt, but Waluigi stole it.
-
But then Waluigi tripped on his own nose.
-
After Mario revived Kirby, red clouds split the sky and the Halberd showed up...
-
Mario noted that the clouds bore some resemblance to the visages of Master Hand, Bowser, Ganondorf and Ridley, but Kirby slapped him across the face and told him to stop being an idiot; but while this humorous exchange was occurring, several ominous dark shapes were descending from the Halberd's underbelly...
-
The ominous dark shapes happened to be the friendly neighbors of Ash Ketchum, and were only trying to hug everyone.
-
Then Mario realized that he had gathered the Namekian Dragon balls, and thus had one more wish (that the neighbors would stop being pansies).
-
Goku jumped out of nowhere and demanded a match with Mario, but they had to wait 23 episodes while Goku powered up.
-
And then everyone died!!!!!!
-
Because that ending took absolutely no time to think up and is extremely anti-climatic, no one actually died and the Goku vs. Mario match began.
-
Mario burped right in Goku's face and the digested lasagna smell cancelled out his super saiyan powers.
-
"Ah crap, I've gotta think of something quick," said Goku, who then flew into the air and began to gather energy for his Spirit Bomb, which would require 24 episodes to complete.
-
Then Vegeta flew in saying, "Kakarot, you incompetent fool, let me handle this!"
-
Vegeta used his Galik Gun, which he uses in only 2 episodes, on Mario, but the Nine-Tailed Fox came and attacked them both!
-
So Luigi decided to help Mario by ripping the fox's tails off one by one.
-
The Nine-Tailed Fox then called in his little-known cousin, the 1000000000000-Tailed Fox, to help.
-
Birdo appeared, and the proceeded to watch behind a tree in curiousity.
-
Then Vegeta, the nine-tailed fox, Mario, Luigi, and the 1000000000000-Tailed Fox all ganged up on Birdo.
-
And then, birdo unleashed the SUPA SECRET ULTIMATE ATTACK OF SECRETNESS!!!!!!(OMG!)* on our group.
*It will be talked about in the next post.
-
It's not very effective...
-
But wait; Everyone started to feel very strange.
-
You cannot grasp the form of Birdo's attack!
-
"Who cannot grasp the form of Birdo's attack?" wondered Mario, who grasped it just fine.
-
"I can't!" said Captain Planet, who was strangely enough, being affected by Birdo's SUPA SECRET ULTIMATE ATTACK OF SECRETNESS!!!!!!(OMG!)*
-
Mario and Goku were not affected by Birdo's attack, so they charged right at her and prepared to blast her face with a fire ball and a ki blast.
-
But it failed and Birdo used Egg Blast. (Why is this suddenly sounding like a Pokemon battle?)
-
Because it is!
Enemy Birdo used Egg Blast!
Captain Planet fainted!
-
Birdo gained OVER 9000 experience points, but it did not matter because at that very same moment Mario and Goku began to slap Birdo silly.
-
Birdo's face became hideously swollen because (after all) Mario was a fairly strong human and Goku was an invincible demi-god.
-
"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about my bruises?" Asked Birdo.
-
"You have OVER 9000 bruises," screamed Vegeta; then Nappa screamed "9000? There's no way that can be right," and then he counted the bruises and said "Oh wait, I guess there are over 9000 bruises."
-
Then the fourth Hokage sealed Birdo in Naruto's navel.
-
Then Naruto became angry and summoned Birdo's power and unleashed a super Birdo attack.
-
Goku blasted both Naruto and Birdo with a huge Kamehameha wave and killed them both.
-
Suddenly, Sam the Eagle walked by, muttering under his breath, "Weirdos! All WEIRDOS! ALL OF YOU!!"
-
Goku was super hungry, so he cooked Sam for dinner.
-
Then, out of nowhere, came a giant octopus that attacked Goku when he tried to steal its treasure!
-
But then the octopus shrunk back down to Mr. Game & Watch.
-
Then Colonel Campbell came out and said "I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork- does a raw blink on Hara-kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!"
-
Meanwhile, Wario invents the Golden Cupcake.
-
Then he ate it because he was hungry, thus he gained super powers!
-
He gained the power of super-fast blinking, thus failing at superpowers.
-
"Darn," said Wario as he blinked his enemies to death.
-
"Hey, Wario, do you have epilepsy?" asked Goku.
-
Wario turned towards Goku in an attempt to destroy him with his super blinking power, but since Goku's powerlevel was like...over 4,000,000,000,000, it failed.
-
Then Goku spent 7.329842509284325592230 episodes charging up a blast that, in the end, won't even affect the enemy.
-
So Gohan had to step in and kill Wario for him; Wario charged up his super blinking laser, Gohan charged up a Kamehameha and the two fired at each other.
-
Both of the attacks ended up being absorbed by Chuck Norris, who happened to be standing right between the two of them as they started their battle.
-
Chuck Norris then fired his newly absorbed powers at Gohan.
-
Gohan screamed "NooooOO! Mah powars!"
So, Mario suddenly became paper!
-
So Paper Mario went off to go star in Paper Mario 3, which involved him having to save a kidnapped Bowser from an evil time traveler.
-
"Man, I really wish I were Rock Mario or Scissors Mario instead of Paper Mario," sighed Mario as the evil time traveler named "Billy" tried to shove him into a paper shredder.
-
But the paper shredder had jammed because Billy had tried to shred his credit card in it two hours earlier.
-
Billy tried to pull his credit card out of the shredder, but as soon as he did, it severed his hand and destroyed Paper Mario, turning him into Boo Mario.
-
Boo Mario went to haunt Goku for failing at destroying Wario.
-
But Boo Mario went into the light and turned back into regular Mario.
-
But then he died and turned back into a Boo anyway.
-
But a Toad pushed him into a Bee Mushroom and he became Bee Mario.
-
But a Toad pushed him into a Bee Mushroom and he became Boo-Bee Mario.
-
Mario decided to get old-school and grabbed a super leaf, transforming into Raccoon Mario (also curing his death/bee/boo condition).
-
Mario then took to the skies and flown, but realized he could only fly so long and began to fall into a large bottomless pit.
-
Luckily there was a launch star there, so he launched back to the top.
-
But then a giant comet slammed right into him and he fell back down the hole, ending his life in a game over.
-
But he decided to continue and started the world from the beginning.
-
Mario had to fight Solid Snake for an odd change of pace.
-
And indeed, after fighting him, Mario noticed that he was walking much more slowly, and with a much larger gait.
-
It turns out that the reason Mario was walking so poorly was because Snake shot him in the leg with a stinger missile (but Mario shot him with a fireball shortly after).
-
Snake ran around looking for a water barrel with the trademark "!" above his head.
-
It then turned to a ? when he saw Goku.
-
When Goky challenged Snake to a fight, the "?" changed to a "VS" with a starburst surrounding it.
-
Goku and Snake prepared to fight while Mario limped over to watch.
-
Goku punched Snake through the stomach, ending the Metal Gear series forever.
-
And Mario tripped and rolled down a hill into a stream.
-
Mario landed in the water and decided to spin, only failing at doing that because his leg was shot by the stinger missle.
-
"Ha! Mario will never suspect that I was the one who shot the stinger missile," laughed someone.
-
Snake, who was actually alive, shot the stinger missile, and because Snake was infected with FOXDIE, Goku died of a heart attack (which is strangely ironic because Goku almost died of a heart virus in the Android saga of DBZ).
-
But Goku was wished back with the black star dragon balls, so everyone went to look for them all over the universe.
-
Then they found them.
-
But it was too late, so the Mushroom Kingdom was destroyed.
-
The end.
-
But not until they a super ultra mega awesome 1-up, and used it on the entire Mushroom Kingdom.
-
"What the ******* just happened!?" asked the foul-tailed-nine-mouthed fox.
Wait...
-
It was then sealed in Runato as Mario healed his limp leg with a 1-up.
-
Mario soon realized how foolish he was for doing so, as the 1-Up Mushroom made him grow another leg -- not a very efficient body feature in the postapocalyptic universe, other than for additional food supplies, and he already knew from experience that his legs were not very appetizing.
-
But Bowser liked the taste of Mario's legs, and so he fried them up along with Mario's arms and changed Mario's name to Stumpy.
-
Now, left with no limbs and a ruined Earth with no sign of his brother or girlfriend, Mario had only one choice.. figure out how to build a flux capacitor so he could go back in time and fix this mess.
-
Mario Stumpy dialed 1-800-CRACKPOT, Dr. Brown's cell number.
-
With his nose, no less, and asked Dr. Brown where he was and if he could help him build a new time machine.
-
"But I need a nuclear reaction to generate the 1.21 gigawatts of electricity I need to make the time machine work," Doc Brown said to Stumpy; so naturally, Stumpy began searching for 1.21 gigawatts.
-
And then the story got even more graphic as Mario killed an annoying, singing dog.
-
Mario/Stumpy laughed at the singing dog as he lay in a pool in his own blood, and then he tried to use nuclear fission as a means to get the energy he needed to power the time machine.
-
Fortunately for Mario/Stumpy, the Starman he kept under his hat could generate more than enough power to get the Flux Capacitor up and running.
-
Unfortunately, Wario grabbed the starman and took off for a brief moment of invincibility while Mario continued to tamper with the extremely risky experiment with nuclear fission.
-
The reactor exploded, and the radiation made Stumpy grow back his limbs, so Stumpy changed his name back to Mario.
-
Mario looked for the pieces of the reactor so he could glue them back together.
-
Thus setting up the plot for the next big Mario game: Super Mario Dystopia
-
After cleaning up the radioactive goop with the FLUDD (which thankfully died of radiation poisoning), Mario gathered the neccessary 1.21 gigawatts to fuel the flux capacitor.
-
Mario wanted to inform Doc Brown that he'd be shot in the future, but Brown ripped up the letter Mario gave him and Mario had no choice but to go BACK TO THE FUTURE (err...I mean past).
-
Mario knew Doc would be shot in the future because Doc's future involved him going back to Mario's past shortly after Mario did, only to get shot by Bowser during an epic battle.
-
Mario tried remembering if he had to go to the past or the future in order to help Brown, but he forgot; so he just put in some random date on the De Lorean's computer, closed the door and prepared to rev the engine up to 88 mph.
-
Mario got out of the De Lorean only to find the Fish in a Spaceship had already fixed everything.
-
Or did it?
-
It didn't. So Mario got back in the De Lorean and took off for the date he entered on the keypad, which was...
-
Pi. (Yes. Pi. 3.141925...)
By the way, pi is March 14, 1925. (Before Mario was born!)
-
But Mario realized that luigalaxy typed in the wrong digits of pi. He knew it really is 3.1415926535...
-
...causing a pair of docks.
-
However, because of the mistake the De Lorean fixed the error by rounding and came up with...
3/14/1592 = March 14, 1592 (Before Nintendo was born! Heck, before the TV was born!)
-
When Mario stepped out of the De Lorean he said,"Nintendo was invented before the T.V.!"
-
After learning this, he had caused a time paradox, and Mario had found the world overruled by Sega.
-
Mario then found himself at King Sonic's castle.
-
Mario had to navigate this level to find Sonic's hidden Chaos Emerald, which seemed to be the closest available power source needed in order for Mario to go back in time yet again and stop this horrible alternate timeline from being created.
-
On his way, he freed Shigeru Miyamoto from the castle dungeon, where he was being tortured by a sadistic version of Yuji Naka.
-
Before leaving, he updated Yuji Naka's firmware, upgrading him from "sadistic version" to "esteemed brain surgeon version."
-
Which wouldn't have made much of a difference since he'd be back to his original personality once Mario went back to 1592 in order to change history back to it's original course, and from there go back to posts made in the last few pages that caused him to turn the present into a dystopian wasteland.
-
"I'm so confused," Mario said as Snake (who was sorry for shooting Mario with a stinger) and Doc Brown showed up from a random wormhole to help him get the future and the past back in order.
-
They proceeded back to 1582, when this post happened:
After learning this, he had caused a time paradox, and Mario had found the world overruled by Sega.
...so Mario jumped on his previous self in order to prevent him from doing this:
When Mario stepped out of the De Lorean he said,"Nintendo was invented before the T.V.!"
...after that, he told the Mario from one page ago that he would thank him for this effort later, and proceeded to travel to the time period when this happened:
But it was too late, so the Mushroom Kingdom was destroyed.
...in order to prevent this from happening:
But not until they a super ultra mega awesome 1-up, and used it on the entire Mushroom Kingdom.
...which would in turn cause this:
Mario soon realized how foolish he was for doing so, as the 1-Up Mushroom made him grow another leg -- not a very efficient body feature in the postapocalyptic universe, other than for additional food supplies, and he already knew from experience that his legs were not very appetizing.
-
Then Kirby showed up and swallowed Doc Brown.
-
Kirby grew long, white hair on the back of his head and gained Brown's personality and quirky intelligence.
-
Mario's head exploded from cute overload when Kirby tried to say "Great Scott."
-
Kirby gave Mario a 1-up mushroom and told Mario to put on a lifejacket; Mario obey and said "That's heavy" while Snake began to call Mario and Doc Kirby "buttheads".
-
Mario, Doc Kirby/ The Buttheads and Snake made it to
Sonickku's Sonic's Castle, but couldn't get in because they needed to find 5 of the 6 pieces of the Cobalt Star, however Mario suggested "We should go back to the-a future! Then we will be able to find the Cobalt Star-a!", so they did as suggested.
-
But because Snake was a jerk and hated Mario and Doc Kirby, he stole the time machine, went back to the past, made huge bets on races that had already happened and got rich.
-
Mario was horrified and/or confused to find that Peach, who was his mother, was married to Snake and had a different body type.
-
"My, what big...hair you have," said Mario as he looked at Peach's chest area; meanwhile, Doc Kirby was trying to figure out where and why the past got so screwed up.
-
It turned out that when they prevented the Mushroom Kingdom from being destroyed in the past, it only delayed Sonic from conquering the world until the future (where that particular Doc. Mario and Kirby belonged), so Mario, and Doc Kirby ended up having to first go back to the era where Snake gave his past self the Sports Almanac in order to prevent the present time from being messed up (where Peach and Snake are his parents), and then later overthrow Sonic.
-
Fragment to make up for long (though not technically run-on) sentence.
-
Then Sonic said "You're too slow" and had a heart attack from running figure 8's all day long.
-
"Well, that takes care of that problem," said Doc Kirby and Mario (who, for no reason at all, changed his name to Mario McFly).
-
"Jinx!" shouted Mario, "You owe me a Diet Dr. Thunder!"
-
"Well, I guess that's what I get for using this darn thing to read your mind," said Doc Kirby as he pulled that odd looking device the original Doc Brown used to try and read Marty McFly's mind in the first movie off of his head.
-
Then a meteor hit the planet and they all died.
-
"Wow, thanks for trying to ruin a developing story," said Doc Kirby, who was still alive because the meteor didn't even exist thanks to the power of a well thought out plot.
-
Suddenly, shots rang out!
-
Doc Brown had been hit in the chest, but his bullet-proof vest saved him.
-
Doc Kirby stood up and removed his vest and Mario McFly looked rather surprised.
-
"This is-a of-a moderate weight-a!" shouted Mario McFly.
-
Mario McFly was driven home by Doc Kirby, who decided to take a trip to the future just for fun.
-
In the future, Mario McFly was accused of murdering Doc Kirby so Phoenix Wright tried to defend him in court.
-
Future Mario McFly sat in his chair and nervously awaited his trial; however, anyone who's played Phoenix Wright will know that Mario will make it out of court virtually unscathed.
-
When the trial was over, Doc Kirby found out that Mario snuck into the courtroom and watched his future self on trial, and once again reminded him that he shouldn't know too much about his own future.
-
Then the future Mario made eye-contact with the present Mario, and we all know what happens after that.
-
The past changed, naturally, and Mario invented both rock and roll -- but mostly roll.
-
Actually, Mario accidentally caused his future self to faint upon seeing him, so he and Doc Kirby had to bring the future Mario back to his home in the future, which was at Peach's Castle, where he was engaged to Peach.
-
"This has been quite a long story, but it looks like we'll have a happy ending after all," said Doc Kirby, commenting on the fact that the story began when Mario had a fight with Goku and Snake about 10 pages back.
-
It was at that moment that Doc Kirby realized that they just found out even more about Mario's future, so they went back to the De Lorian (which now has a Mr. Fusion attached to it, for easy power source) to proceed back to the present time of 2008...
...but not before Mario asked "Wait-a Doc, if I'm-a not the one who kills you in-a da future, who does?"... to which Doc Kirby responded....
-
... Dick Van Dyke.
-
Dun-dun-DUN!
Anyway, Meta Knight (who was hiding all this time and following the group) suggested that they go about 2 days back into the past and stop Dick Van Dyke from killing Doc Kirby but Doc Kirby said "That could cause un-eraseable changes to the space-time compendium-ium-ium!"
-
"We've already done enough damage as it is, so let's go," said Mario McFly.
-
Suddenly, Mario Tom Fletcher, lead singer of Mario McFly, broke out into an impromptu a capella rendition of Johnny B. Goode.
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Flh3.ggpht.com%2Fadam.menard%2FSGqf_7mxy6I%2FAAAAAAAAAYI%2FtRE9h4Yw45g%2Fs800%2Fmariotomfletcher.jpg&hash=9143fd9374513ebbb7c05397bab549f2)
-
...so Doc Kirby threw a handful of garbage into the Mr. Fusion unit, turned on the time circuits, and revved the speed up to 88 mph, so he and Mario finally went home.
-
"How about we just stay home this time," Doc Kirby suggested.
-
Solid Snake then came out of a cardboard box conveniently between them and said in his heroic gruff voice, "No. You can't. We got a new problem."
-
"It seems like my good friend Raiden has gone crazy and is trying to take over the world with a new Metal Gear," said Snake through his extremely manly mustache.
-
and Snake revealed himself to be... SCORPION!
-
"Snake is-a The Rock?" asked Doc Kirby, imitating Mario McFly's Italian accent, which Mario McFly has despite his Irish name.
-
The MegaSonic got banned, thus erasing that little reveal from existance, so instead Snake said...
-
"Treat your box with care and be sure not to get it wet," to which Mario replied "What does that have to do with anything?"
-
Little did he know that very soon, perhaps even in the very next sentence, he would discover precisely how box-wetting gave meaning to his entire life.
-
Mario McFly and Doc Kirby snuck through the rain and prepared to board a truck bound for McDonalds (which was closed for the evening), so the ability to keep the box dry was extremely vital.
-
... And they made it!
-
Once in the McDonalds, they carefully opened the box just as Snake instructed them to, and...
-
Everything was going according to plan; Mario and Doc Kirby were going to use the appliances inside the kitchen to build a Metal Gear that would rival Raiden's Metal Gear.
-
They built a splendid Metal Gear, but they were unable to wash away the stench of greasy fast food that clung to it, so they christened it "McMetal."
-
McMetal rose and smashed through the ceiling of the Mcdonalds (which made the manager, who was just arriving to open the store, very angry) and began to make its way towards Alaska (Raiden's current location); however, Mario and Kirby had to pick up Snake before they could go.
-
But Snake was no where to be found, making Mario and Kirby think Raiden had captured him.
-
Mario then forgot about the whole ordeal and ordered double his weight in McDonalds food, giving half to Kirby, as was the pink puffball's daily meal plan.
-
Mario gained 1000 pounds, which made it difficult for McMetal to move correctly.
-
Mario availed himself of the built-in treadmill inside Mcmetal.
-
"Okay, I'm back in shape," said Mario McFly, so Doc Kirby punched in a few buttons and McMetal began to move towards Alaska.
-
At Alaska, they found Snake hiding under a giant pot, and they then assumed that the pot was replacing his old box disguise.
-
Snake came out from his giant pot and he pointed to the disposal facility he had to sneak through 9 years ago on Shadow Moses island.
-
The MegaSonic got banned, thus erasing that little reveal from existance, so instead Snake said...
Meanwhile, MegaSonic steals The Chef's SPATULA for that remark.
-
But no one cared because it wasn't relevant to the story; Snake, Mario and Doc Kirby ran towards Shadow Moses island while an army of grunts prepared to battle them.
-
Thankfully McMetal just stepped on them... but then, Raiden showed up piloting his Metal Gear...
-
Snake assumed control of McMetal's huge rail gun (which was actually just a huge spatula) while Doc Kirby assumed control of McMetal's laser beam.
-
Doc Kirby kept missing, and Raiden's Metal Gear was starting to pummel the heck out of McMetal, so Mario took control of the laser mechanism and blasted away at Raiden using his expert marksman skills.
-
"Wait, I have expert marksman skills?" Mario asked as he continued to fire at Raiden's Metal Gear.
-
"Well, you are Mario McFly" said the narrator.
-
"Oh yeah, that's right," said Mario as he remembered that he got all of his skills from a 7-Eleven.
-
McMetal and Raiden's Unnamed Metal Gear had taken a lot of damage, and seemed like they could barely take any more hits. Before they could even realize it, a hole had erupted from the ground between them causing flaming debris to fly everywhere. Out of the hole had emerged Lavos, the parasitic life form that feeds on planets. Snake and Raiden had faced their Metal Gears torward the beast with light glaring across their visors, baffled at what to do next.
-
"Someone just totally broke the one sentence rule," said Snake.
-
"I have no idea what's going on with this Metal Gear stuff," said CrossEyed7.
-
"May I suggest you play a Metal Gear game?" said Snake as he handed CrossEyed7 a copy of Metal Gear Solid.
-
Then the cameraman fixed his camera so the action would go back to focusing on Mario and Kirby piloting McMetal against Raiden's Metal Gear, which he called "The Mauve Avenger".
-
Avenger and McMetal clashed while Snake (who had jumped out of McMetal) threw a few chaff grenades in an attempt to screw up Avenger's targeting system.
-
Metal_Slug_Mario then threw up his arms and said, "Since I broke the one sentence rule, does that mean my segment of the story didn't count or what?"
-
"Well, when you post a lot of sentences like that you don't really give the other members an opportunity to write the rest of the story," said Snake as he continued to toss chaff grenades.
-
But before the grenades could do any damage, Metal_Slug_Mario was kidnapped by his father, who was his sister, Metal_Gear_Mario.
-
"Wait, how can you be both my father and my sister!?" said Metal_Slug_Mario.
-
"This is gettin' weird," said Mario McFly and Doc Kirby.
-
Just as it looked like McMetal had no hope, Goku, Vegeta, the Nine-Tailed Fox, and Naruto caught up and reduced Avenger to a pile of scrap.
-
Raiden popped out of Avenger and sliced Naruto in half with one swift stroke of his blade, while Snake prepared to battle the maniac.
-
But Naruto was still alive; the Naruto Raiden sliced in half was a doppleganger!
-
Raiden smacked Naruto for saying "believe it" so many times and then turned his attention to Snake, Mario and Doc Kirby, the true threats.
-
"But wait, they are all shadow clones!" said Goku as he charged up a kamehameha wave that was going to hit Wart.
-
"Ooooh, what does this button do?" asked Wart, reaching for a button labelled "DETONATE."
-
A huge nuclear bomb blew up in his face, but Doc Kirby, Mario McFly, Snake, Raiden, Goku and Vegeta survived by hiding under Snake's box.
-
The box itself, though, was not so lucky.
-
But they were fine, so they buried the box and held a funeral service for it.
-
"Great Scott, this is all too sad to bare," said Doc Kirby as he threw in a few flowers to honor the box.
-
Then the Unicron Singularity warped reality to the point where Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad were going out for a walk again....
-
"That's rather anticlimatic," said Mario.
-
But it was only an illusion...
-
"That's good to know," said Doc Kirby who turned to the evil Raiden and shot at him with a laser gun.
-
Mario McFly began to scratch his head wondering about what side everyone was on.
-
"Could it be that we're all secretly evil and Raiden is in fact a good guy?" Mario McFly pondered.
-
But it was too late to find out, as Snake just blew up Raiden with a rocket launcher.
-
Then an angry mob of senior citizens at a nearby Senior Home attacked Doc Kirby, Mario McFly, Snake, Goku, and Vegeta.
-
"What a stunning turn of events," said Mario McFly as he began punching one of the senior citizens.
-
Luckily, one of the senior citizens was Granny Tsunade, and Naruto got her to call off her friends.
-
But she instead beat the crap out of Naruto.
-
Then Mario said: give me some cash. I need a Toffee Crisp.
And a bottle of Cherry Coke.
-
"Wait a minute!" said Naruto, halting the story, "why does everyone but Turtlekid1 try to kill me off!?"
-
"I guess no one really likes you here," said Captain Falcon, the epitome of complete and utter coolness.
-
Suddenly, Turtlekid1 teleported himself into the story and rammed a nine-foot pole down Captain Falcon's throat, saying "Who's cool now racer boy?"
*Teleports back into reality*
-
All the characters in the story started to bicker amongst themselves about the story plotline while Mario McFly went to go get a bottle of Cherry coke and a Toffee Crisp at the gas station that was located conveniently next to them.
-
Captain Falcon, who was so cool that he was not harmed by the pole, proceeded to destroy Naruto (who called him a name while they were all bickering) with a massive Falcon Punch.
-
The Falcon Punch was so massive and powerful, it caused a dimensional rift, and thus the story was reborn as an Elseworlds story featuring a Nintendo/DC amalgmation (Mario is Superman, DK is Batman, Link is the Green Arrow, Pit is Hawkman, Kirby is the Martian Manhunter, Pokemon are the Green Lantern Corps, Samus is Wonder Woman, Star Fox are the Blackhawks, etc.).
-
Supermario, Batkong, Martian Puffhunter, Green Lightarrow, Angelman, Yellow Lantern (Pikachu), Wonder Samus and Blackfox all set off to destroy "Rex" Luther (AKA Bowser), who had decided to take over the world!
-
But, everyone stopped when Wart asked "Who am I?"
-
Before Wart could figure out who he was, Batkong flew down and took him to jail.
-
Where the writers reminded Wart that he was either supposed to be Metallo or General Zod, and couldn't make up their minds.
-
Everyone was confused, so that green alien guy who drives the Wild Mongoose from F-Zero decided to join the next Super Smash Bros. with his signature attack, Mongoose Spin!
-
But that didn't happen because it had nothing to do with the story, so Rex Luthor began to initiate his world-conquering plot, which was...
-
Shutting down every Starbucks in the greater county area...evil.
-
"Oh, this is horrible," said Blackfox, who was cruising in to the drive-through of Starbucks in his Arwing.
-
Meanwhile, Batkong was in the Kongcave (lol) trying to figure out what kind of technology Rex used to pull off such a stunt, then...
-
... all of the power in the city (which is powered by a human-like machine) went out because it didn't want to drive to... Dunkin Donuts.
-
Then Naruto (who is now known as Narobin, Batkong's sidekick) popped out of his grave, summoned the Demon Fox's Chakra, and used it to power the city and threaten Rex Luthor into re-opening Starbucks.
-
"Give me a break," said Batkong, who was extremely frustrated that Naruto was his sidekick and not Diddy Kong (who is almost always his sidekick).
-
Then Turtlekid got kicked off the writing staff and a white plothole (the nice kind) re-wrote the story to have Diddy be Batkong's sidekick (here named Simian, because it's hard to combine Diddy and Robin's names).
-
Batkong and Simian took off to defeat Rex Luther so Blackfox could order his cappuccino at Starbucks.
-
Suddenly, union rules forced PaperLuigi to stop writing, leaving Batkong and Simian in suspended animation for several thousand years.
-
"Whoa, that's kinda weird," said Supermario, who found Batkong after about 1,000 years and brought his frozen body in for examination (PaperLuigi was soon arrested for breaking the union law).
-
But Batkong broke PaperLuigi out of prison, allowing the story to continue without a hitch, except for being a thousand years later.
-
Luckily all of the super heros had been put in suspended animation (just like Batkong) so they were all okay, but the scenery looked more futuristic.
-
Then when the writer's strike was over, the new team of writers (headed by me, The Chef) proceeded to put the story back on track, starting with Rex Luthor organizing a team of supervillains, including the J. Oker and Mewnestro!
-
"Hopefully the new story won't involve Naruto," said PaperLuigi.
-
Which it didn't, because the Justice League of Nintendo were in the middle of divising a plan to stop Rex Luthor's team of supervillains right now...
-
"Rex Ruthor? Rut's rat?" asked Scooby Doo, who had a strange feeling he had just broken some cosmic law by not phrasing his entire statement in a single sentence.
-
Suddenly, some old man with a walker came up to the JLN and said "I'm ready to help you whippersnappers save the world! Believe it!"
...can you guess who the old man is?
-
"No, I cannot," lied CrossEyed7, rather pointlessly.
-
"Muahaha! I fooled you all!" laughed Dr. Sloth, ripping off his "Old Man Naruto" mask.
-
"Wait, who the hell is Dr. Sloth?" asked Wonder Samus.
-
Wonder Samus had many such questions, befitting her name.
-
"I wonder what's for dinner?" asked Wonder Samus, to which Green Lightarrow (Link) responded with "I'm so hungry, I could eat an Octorok!"
-
Then The Chef, as head of the writing staff, puzzled to figure out which DC villain Dr. Sloth was supposed to be a parody of, while at the same time scolding PL for using that accursed meme in this story.
-
Rather than writing anything to progress the story, CrossEyed7 mused that Link would probably be a better Batman than Donkey Kong, and that Toon Link would be a good Robin.
-
The Chef told CrossEyed that he would discuss that later, and decided continue the story with Dr. Sloth falling into a white plothole and Rex Luthor threatening the world with a black plothole generator (which he was still in the process of building).
-
But creating a machine that can make a black hole was an idea that was overused, so Space Ghost decided to organize his own team of supervillains that would one day make the best meatball heroes ever.
-
"This story is getting way out of hand," said PL, who was totally confused over who was in the story and who wasn't in the story.
-
However, when the meatball heroes were finished, Green Lightarrow and Wonder Samus ate them all and Space Ghost vowed he would have his vengence on his meaty heroes.
(By the way, Kimimaru, it was a black plothole generator, not a black hole generator.)
-
Then Angelman and Yellow Lantern made a dramatic entrance.
-
A very dramatic entrance!
-
So dramatic that they both started to cry.
-
Then, they continued to cry.
-
Angelman was crying because he didn't look macho enough, and Yellow Lantern was crying because of Angelman's onion-scented deodorant.
-
Then I had a mental breakdown because of how far the story had strayed from the original title.
-
"Well, technically this is still a Mario story," said Supermario.
-
Then every single character besides Mario and Luigi up to this page got the BSOD, and had to recover.
-
So Mario and Luigi proceed to reassume themselves as the main characters of the story by being the ones who have to help everyone recover.
-
First, they tried to help Angelman and Yellow Lantern stop crying.
-
So Mario offered them some tissues, while Luigi went over to Blackfox (who had the flu) and Martian Puffhunter (who had gas) and gave them some Theraflu and Gas-X, respectively.
-
Then, Mario and Luigi helped Batkong get over his fear of toilet paper, which he wouldn't have if supervillains hadn't been using it as a weapon.
(luigalaxy, I knew it was a black plothole, but in a story's perspective, a plothole is a black hole :p)
-
Then, when Mario and Luigi had cured the JLN, they set out for the hardest task of all: curing Naruto of the "'Believe it!' Syndrome."
-
After curing Naruto, they set out to cure Jaiden Yuki of the "get your game on!" virus.
-
Then Naruto proceeded to plan his revenge on the members of Fungi Forums (except Turtlekid1) for trying to kill him off every chance they got.
-
But first, he had to learn another random Japanese technique whose name he would shout out before executing, thus giving away the whole move.
-
So the forum members proceeded to beat Naruto down with sticks and stones (they broke his bones) but for some reason, their insults had no effect on him.
-
But, being Naruto, he didn't give up.
-
Suddenly, Zombie Snape attacked everyone, and with his proficiency in non-verbal spellcasting, he took everyone by surprise!
-
"GLARGH!" screamed Snape as he took a bite out of Naruto's head.
-
But Naruto used the art of substitution with... Snape; so Snape actually bit off a chunk of his own head.
-
However, this recursiveness soon made Snape infinitely strong.
-
A bunch of Disney characters (including Hercules, Robin Hood, Mulan, Simba, Tod and Copper, Peter Pan, Bernard and Bianca, Bambi, and their leader Mickey Mouse) popped out of nowhere and decided to do battle with Super Snape!
-
Except Robin Hood, who ran off to be in PaperLuigi's avatar.
-
But he was called back to action by his fellow Disney pals, so PL put up a fake Robin Hood as his avatar.
-
And Robin Hood made a dramatic entrance.
-
So dramatic that it was even more dramatic than the Dramatic Prairie Dog.
-
It was so dramatic, luigalaxy had to use italics.
(O.O PL, you posted a minute after I did.)
-
After everyone stared in awe at Robin Hood's entrance, Super Snape decided to attack Hercules!
-
On his way to Hercules, Super Snape stubbed his toe on a rock, shouting "Oh, %&@?$>%#," and got banned from this story for language.
-
"Now what do we do?" asked Robin Hood, who had made a very dramatic entrance for no reason.
-
"We go to Captain Falcon's house!" exclaimed Hercules, who seemed excited.
-
"Well, why wouldn't we be excited?" asked the Rescuers, who (because they were very small mice) took twice as long to reach Captain Falcon's house.
-
"Whew, we made it," said Bernard, just as Captain Falcon accidentally stepped on them, forever destroying any chance of another badly-written Rescuers sequel.
-
But before Captain Falcon could apply pressure to his step, Hercules and Mulan called him over for tea, so Bernard and Bianca were neither crushed nor harmed for that matter.
Note to TurtleKid1: Rescuers 2 is just as good, if not better, than the original. When's the last time you saw it? If your answer is "at age 5," I suggest you watch it again.
-
Then Naruto showed up in a full-body cast and shouted, "What'd I miss?" while accidentally crushing the Rescuers (for real this time).
-
But PaperLuigi revived the Rescuers with a 1-up shroom and Captain Falcon (who remembered that Naruto tried to kill him by shoving a pole down his throat about 6 pages ago) went nuts and destroyed Naruto with a massive Falcon Punch.
(Please stop bringing Naruto back into the story. Several forum members who have been writing this story have killed him off at least once since his initial appearance on page 107).
-
Kyaputen Farukon was clearly uneasy about the unclear enthusiasm of visiting his domicile, but reluctantly agreed.
(Seriously, people, especially you, introduce way too many characters to keep a story going. You aren't in any position to complain.)
(I'm not advocating the existence of pseudo-ninja-shonen in this poorly maintained tale, I'm making a point.)
-
Then Goofy came out of nowhere and decided he wanted to make some stew, and he used Naruto's body as one of his ingredients.
-
So Goofy used Naruto for stew and everyone (including Captain Falcon) had a big feast.
-
But it turned our that Naruto had never been in the story at all; the "Naruto" in the stew was a fanboy in a costume.
-
After their feast, Captain Falcon invited everyone inside; while the rest of them were in the living room talking, Falcon was throwing a few punches in his gym.
-
Then, out of absolutely nowhere came Huck the Hyena, who then destroyed Captain Falcon's house and started attacking the peaceful villagers of Kimiville.
-
Then, out of the rubble of Captain Falcon's house came Shaggy, who decided to fight Huck to save Kimiville.
-
"This is getting out of hand," said Mario McFly, who magically appeared (just like everyone else) with his buddy, Doc Kirby.
-
Then, Sonic yelled out, "Look! A Chain Chomp!", farted a mighty fart, and caused the story to restart. :)
-
Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad went out for a walk.
-
Little did they know that Bowser was taking a walk up the other side of the road...
-
Bowser wasn't alone however, as he was walking with his beloved son, Bowser Jr.
-
Then Bowser and Bowser Jr. asked Mario if they could have some spagetti.
-
Mario replied, "No, but you can have some pizza," and when Bowser and Bowser Jr. looked dismayed, he added "My boys, this pizza is what all true warriors strive for!"
-
"I just wonder what Wario's up to," said Bowser; just then, Donkey Kong swooped in and said "Your Majesty, Wario and his minions have seized Yoshi's Island!"
-
"You must help Breezy eliminate Sonic!" ordered Barnacle Bill.
-
But Breezy was unable to eliminate Sonic because a giant wall blocked him, and R.O.B came from the sky to take Yoshi's Island for himself!
-
So now YOU gotta help!
-
But since Wario had already seized Yoshi Island, ROB was forced to leave and find a job in New York.
-
Ironically, he got a job making little-known gaming peripherals.
-
"Only Bowser can defeat Wario," said Donkey Kong; meanwhile, ROB was earning well over 30 dollars an hour at his new job.
-
"Great! I'll grab my son!" said Bowser, while ROB realized that his overhead costs were 31 dollars an hour.
-
"There is no time," said Donkey Kong. "Your shell is enough!"
-
So Bowser defeated Wario by grabbing him, spinning around, and throwing him into the ocean while saying "So long, greedy Wario!"
-
So (much like Ganon in Faces of Evil) Wario was defeated in one hit and peace returned to Yoshi Island...or did it?
-
Yes, yes it did, now that the unfortunate event is behind us forever let's all help Breezy eliminate Sonic!
-
Breezy tried to seduce Sonic, but it was no good because Sonic didn't want to be touched in a way or a place that made him feel uncomfortable.
-
"Darn Bird Person's Brawl pics!" shouted Breezy, before starting to hunt down BP for revenge.
-
Breezy went to go get revenge on BP, but on the way there she fell off a cliff and shattered into several pieces when she hit the bottom.
-
So Waluigi was at the bottom of the cliff and tried to repair Breezy, but when Waluigi was finished, Breezy looked like Mario.
-
"Why do I have an insatiable appetite for lasagna?" asked Breezy, "And I know it's not because Turtlekid1 typed this sentence!"
-
Dr. Robotnik took one look at the new Breezy and totally freaked!
-
It wasn't in a good way, either; so, scared out of his mind, Dr. Robotnik powered up his anti-Breezy gauss cannon.
-
Breezy tried to run away, but Robotnik was already locked on to her position, so her efforts were futile.
-
Then a bullet bill hit into the cannon and blew it up, causing Robotnik to run away back to his lab and create a new machine that will try to defeat Sonic!
-
Robotnik invited Sonic in for tea and said "How thoughtful of me!"
-
But before they could continue with tea time, a giant missile hit Robotnik in the face and caused him to crash into a building.
-
"I've fallen and I can't get up!" screamed Robotnik as everyone laughed at him.
-
And Mario began filming Robotnik crying.
-
Mario put the film on YouTube and it became a viral sensation.
-
Then Toad filmed Mario filming Robotnik crying and that became a viral sensation as well.
-
Then Waluigi filmed Toad filming Mario filming Robotnik crying, but that failed to become popular at all leading to further widespread ridicule of Luigi's doppelganger.
-
Waluigi went into his room and ate a bucket of ice cream after crying for a few hours.
-
Which turned him into Fat Waluigi, so he had to go ask the Star Spirits to grant his wish to become Buff Waluigi, that way he could finally take on Buff Luigi and keep Hot Daisy for himself.
-
But Buff Luigi found out about Buff Waluigi's plot to destroy him, so he began a rigorous workout regime that turned him into Steroid Luigi!
-
But then Steroid Luigi was kicked out of the story for illegal use of his namesake.
-
Steroid Luigi went to jail after he was found guilty of using steroids; meanwhile, Buff Waluigi tried to put the moves on Hot Daisy!
-
Suddenly, aliens came to attack and all of Mario's crew gathered together to determine who the superstar was; creating another Mario Party adventure!
-
But everyone was so sick of playing Mario Party that they all just gave up; meanwhile, Buff Waluigi was still trying to put the moves on Hot Daisy!
-
"Y'know," said Morbidly Obese Peach, "what's the difference between "Hot Daisy" and "Regular Daisy"?
-
"About 40 degrees Fahrenheit." responded Hairy Wario.
-
"I propose we stop putting adjectives at the beginning of our names," said Mario.
-
"No." said Awesome Toad
-
"YES!" cried Morbidly Obese Peach.
-
"Why?" asked Inquisitive Tatanga.
-
Then Wario took over the world and renamed everyone Wario so that no one would have an adjective at the beginning of their name.
-
"I love you Wario!" shouted Wario, fulfilling a long-unrequited love now that no one would know who either of them were.
-
Wario went to the store and bought some donuts while Wario was watching TV.
-
Then one Wario lost weight, wore black overalls, a purple shirt, and a purple cap and named himself Waluigi when he took over the world to rename everyone else Waluigi!
-
So then Waluigi, Waluigi, Waluigi, and Waluigi went out for a walk...
-
"Look," said Waluigi, "A Waluigi!"
-
Waluigi pulled down his pants and farted a mighty fart; but in a stunning twist, Dr. Waluigi (formally known as Dr. Robotnik) got hit by the fart and had to go to the emergency room!
-
Then Dr.
Waluigi Robotnik woke up.
-
"Aw, man it was all a dream / I guess that kinda thing could never happen to me / But if it was a dream and it wasn't real / How'd I get a jersey with the name O'Neal?" pondered Dr. Walnut, the last word echoing into oblivion.
-
Then the Adams family busted down the door to the emergency room and named every single random thing in existence!
-
Since that sentence was incorrectly phrased, the story restarted from this post:
"Aw, man it was all a dream / I guess that kinda thing could never happen to me / But if it was a dream and it wasn't real / How'd I get a jersey with the name O'Neal?" pondered Dr. Walnut, the last word echoing into oblivion.
-
Hey Waluigi! That's not a Waluigi," said Waluigi,"That's a Waluigi!"
-
Then a bunch of Chain Chomps started chasing the Waluigis.
-
Meanwhile, the other Waluigi pondered whether The Chef had only restarted the story so he could hear an Aaron Carter song again.
-
The chain chomps renamed all the Waluigis, this time to random Koopaling names.
-
So a mysterious force came and changed everything back to normal.
-
Then another mysterious force came and changed everything back to abnormal.
-
"I'm tired of these mother freaking forces in this mother freaking story!" said Mario L. Jackson.
-
So Luigi B. Jackson went to the store to pick up some goods.
-
But on the way he ran into another mysterious force and had to fight it.
-
So Mario used Fire Orb on the Mysterious Force and caused 137 damage.
-
Mysterious Force used Story Restart...but it failed!
-
Then Mario threw a pokeball at the Mysterious Force!
-
"Darn! The 'Pokémon' broke free!" said Mario.
-
Mysterious Force calls his gang.... but nothing happens!
-
Mario grits his teeth and flexes his muscles! (+2 guts)
-
Mysterious Force looks in the trashcan... Found a Hamburger! But, he can't carry it.
-
Mysterious Force and Mario Bros. become friends! (Friendship +3)
-
Mysterious force would like to learn "beer drink," but it already knows five moves.
-
Forget "pee" and learn "beer drink"?
-
One...two...three...poof! Mysterious Force forgot pee! And...Mysterious Force learned "beer drink!"
-
Mysterious Force used Beer Drink, and became drunk!
One...two...three...poof! Mysterious Force forgot pee! And...Mysterious Force learned "beer drink!"
(So much for the one sentence rule...)
-
(So I was supposed to only say "One...two...three...poof?" That doesn't make sense.)
Mysterious Force passed out!
-
"Can I catch it now?" asked Mario.
-
Before he can get an answer, the Mysterious Force fled to the nearby forest while holding a piano.
-
It played Symphony 22 in E flat on the piano, which caused the entire forest to move and develop into an interpretive dance scene.
-
Suddenly, two bushes revealed themselves to actually be Biggs and Wedge, the Ninjis from the Neglected Characters sprite comixes, in an odd, Final-Crisis-type crossover with TMK, shouting, "Hullo and good morrow to you, well-mustachioed gentleman; bear us no mind, for we are merely leafy masses of photosynthetia, and certainly not highwaymen ready to rob you and who bear a striking resemblance to a pair of hoodlums whom you may have encountered earlier today!"
-
All of this was sung and the audience went nuts.
-
"Do not be alarmed, audience, for we are obviously being wholly silent and motionless, as trees like us are wont to do; allow us to interpretive dance how silent and motionless we are now being!" "Yes, behold, behold our motionlessness!" piped in the other one, breaking the rules carelessly.
-
"AUGH!" cried Charlie Brown, "Make the run-ons stop!"
-
Charlie Brown was accompanied by Sonic and Tails, who both thought the run-ons were "No good!"
-
Charlie Brown ditched Sonic and Tails and went to Snoopy, who then smacked him in the face with a baseball bat.
-
Which was completely out of character, so the story restarted from here:
Charlie Brown was accompanied by Sonic and Tails, who both thought the run-ons were "No good!"
-
Sonic created another "Sonic Sez" segment where he explained how "uncool" run-ons were.
-
And then, Birdo appeared, who was hiding behind a tree!
-
But no one cared.
-
Except Bowser Jr., who cared alot.
-
But Bowser Jr. cared in a naughty way, so Bowser spanked him.
-
Thus causing the Koopalings to reappear as bosses in the next Mario game!
-
And Flurrie will make an appearance in the next Mario game.
-
*bounce bounce bounce*
-
The Star Fox team then made a dramatic entrance into the Mario Universe!
-
The Star Fox team then made a dramatic exit out of the Mario Universe!
-
The Star Fox team then made a dramatic entrance into the Metroid Universe!
-
And Flurrie was hiding on the Great Fox!
-
PaperLuigi slapped his forehead and remembered why it was bad of him to include so many Disney characters into the story a few pages back.
-
And so all Disney characters, hidden and revealed, were expelled from the story (except Hannah Montana).
-
Hannah Montana was given a Falcon Punch by Captain Falcon before she could get herself pregnant like so many of her fellow teen idols.
-
Hannah Montana drank the punch then decided to join the Brawl.
-
(Turtlekid, do you like Hannah Montana?)
She began to sing an annoying country song and was knocked out cold about 5 seconds later in a 4 player battle royal involving Sonic, Kirby, Captain Falcon, and herself.
-
While they were fighting, Kimimaru wondered why The Chef keeps on canceling out his additions to the story; especially since he did it 4 times in a row.
-
"The Chef does that to a lot of people, but with really good reason," said PaperLuigi.
-
"Yeah! He's making me lasagna!" said Turtlekid1.
(Turtlekid, do you like Hannah Montana?)
(Not really, I wanted to see if she would get shot down as quickly as Naruto.)
-
(Quite frankly I'm just tired of a bunch of random characters coming into the story when the plot is getting good. I'm guilty of it too and it was stupid of me to include a bunch of random characters into the story a few pages back.)
The Chef continued to make lasagna until his hand cramped up.
-
Then he resourcefully made lasagna with his other hand.
-
And Luigi was told to Keep Wolf away from Daisy by direct orders from The Mushroom Kingdom Canceler. You remember when Mario walked in on the two of them having...
-
Since nensondubois disgustingly suggested that Wolf and Daisy had sex, everyone ignored the off topic comment and went back to the story at hand (The Chef's left hand to be precise).
-
The crowd watching this story started to to make "ooooooo" noises with uneasy faces.
-
Wolf was in utter disbelief that someone would suggest that he would even think about getting in a bed with a human while the crowd took a bite of Chef's awesome lasagna.
-
"Arrgh! My lasagna!" said Turtlekid1, chasing after the crowd; meanwhile, Wolf started building an interdimensional portal to come to this dimension and destroy whoever had paired him with Daisy.
-
"So I guess he's going to destroy nensondubois?" asked PaperLuigi, who was mad at nenosondubois for parring up Wolf and Daisy but didn't think it was necessary of Wolf to destroy him.
-
"Destroy nensondubois?" said Wolf, "Dang, I can't even spell 'nensondubois'!"
-
It was here that The Chef was forced to use his remaining hand to cook a twelve egg omlette that was so good it would prevent everyone from trying to sleep with and/or kill each other.
-
"If there's anyone who can make an omlette that good, it's Chef," said Mario, who was aware of his legendary cooking skills.
-
Everyone ate some of the omelette, causing them to feel at peace with the world but also drowsy and so they drifted off to sleep; Bowser had sneaked tranquilizer in every piece of the omelette but his own (in which he sneaked anti-peace drug)!
-
So it finally came to down to high-speed, special effects-ridden sky chase between Bowser in the Koopa Clown Copter and The Chef in his Chefplane.
-
Thus starting an epic battle of epicness
-
Suddenly, Bowser farted a mighty fart, and blasted the chef out of his magical flying boat thing.
-
...but The Chef wasn't in a magical flying boat thing, so instead he chased Bowser all the way to the top of his newest castle, where the aforementioned epic battle of epicness was about to unfold...
-
Michael Buffer came out and said "Let's get ready to rumble!" while Chef and Bowser got ready to beat the snot out of each other.
-
Bowser attempted a dirty trick: he drank a gallon of Koopa Kola, which made him grow 30 tall!
-
Bowser also had some KeroKero Colas making him even more unstoppable.
-
But The Chef had his special recipe of cranberry juice, which made him stronger than Bowser!
-
The Chef then used Spatula Slap, one hit ko-ing Bowser.
-
Bowser woke up after about 10 minutes and began to fight dirty, even though the actual fight was over.
-
Then The Chef got a final smash orb...
-
Which was used to BLAST MushroomJunkie, jmdblazer, Luigalaxy, and PaperLuigi to bits! After he pressed the B button of course. Then, Kirby showed up in a very angry temper....
-
Kirby tried to attack Chef for using a similar final smash, but Chef used his final smash again and sent Kirby into a cooking pot!
-
Then The Chef was recruited to be in the next season of hell's kitchen after an agent tasted his excellent Kirby stew.
-
Before he could join however, he'd have to pass an excruciating test.
-
In order to get into the show, he would need to get all 100 questions right, however, he only got 99 right, thus causing him not to go onto Hell's Kitchen.
-
Which The Chef was actually glad about, since he was sick of all the writers putting him into situations he did not want to be a part of.
-
After reading that, Kirby ate The Chef but Kirby did not gain special powers but he turned into a duck instead,
-
"How...random..." said PaperLuigi.
-
No one knew that this is a form of ancient magic to recieve another beings powers except MushroomJunkie the Wizard, of course, who caught onto it right away because of his great experience with magic and sorcery.
-
But then he got captured and burned at the stake.
-
The people of the village decided The Wizard's fiery fate was handed down by gods, angry about TMKers posting run-on sentences in the "ONE Sentence" Tale topic, sprinkling some commas, and calling it a day.
-
But the the dead awoke and MushroomJunkie the Wizard was brought back to life.
-
Then The Chef escaped the black hole that was Kirby's stomach and kicked MushroomJunkie out of the story because he was sick of all the ridiculous changes that were going on.
-
"The Chef did it again," said PaperLuigi. "But with good reason."
-
Then PaperLuigi talked with PaperMario about how things were at the Fungi Forums.
-
The Fungi Forums were fine; meanwhile, Mario was sitting at his desk, trying to come up with a good story that didn't involve a sudden plot change or a deus ex machina.
-
But then Bowser crashed through the wall and stole the story from Mario.
-
So Mario and The Chef teamed up to defeat Bowser once again.
-
This time The Chef was prepared and him and mario did 65 combos on him!
-
PaperLuigi correct MJ's bad grammar so the sentence read "He and Mario did 65 combos on Bowser."
-
This time, The Chef was prepared, as he activated the morpher he wore on his arm, thus calling his giant Ivory Chefzord into battle.
-
The giant Ivory Chefzord attacked Bowser with such a mighty blow that Bowser was sent flying through his castle walls!
-
Bowser came back in his clown car after gathering an entire army of Paratroopas!
-
But they all suddenly died from the flu leaving just bowser again.
-
The Chef used Deep Fryer; Mario used Bounce!
-
Bowser blocked both techniques and went in for a counter attack!
-
Bowser then wrote in the story that he had a giant killer robot, which then appeared and attacked them.
-
Mario and Chef jumped up to attack the robot (which was being piloted by Bowser's cohort, Dr. Robotnik), but they bounced off the bot's tough exterior and fell to the ground.
-
Just as it looked hopeless for our heroes, the robot ran out of blinker fluid, causing it to explode!
-
Then Chef pulled out his famous "Super Pizza" and used it as a shield to block the dangerous debris hurling from the explosion towards him and Mario, they were saved for the moment, until a giant, monsterous, demon-possesed birthday cake started rampaging towards them in a horrible rage!!
-
But the monster cake didn't exist yet because MJ broke the one sentence rule.
-
The monster cake had an existential crisis as he was mentioned in a self-referential sentence, despite possibly not existing.
-
But then MJ edited his post and took out the exclimation point which made it one sentence, so the story continues from post #2204.
-
Suddenly, Doc Kirby appeared!
-
"Thank goodness for comma splices," said the cake monster, who began smashing stuff after the time paradox destroyed half of the Mushroom Kingdom.
-
Mario and The Chef ended up having to use The Chef's Coca-Cola powered Time Fridge to go back to this post:
Suddenly, Doc Kirby appeared!
...and stop CrossEyed from using the comma splice thus saving the Mushroom Kingdom in the present post.
-
The Mushroom Kingdom was safe, but the Great Fox was under attack by Star Wolf!
-
"Can't let you do that, Star Fox!" said Wolf as Fox tried to take the last beer during a football game the two were watching.
-
Then Star Fox grabbed for it along with Wolf which made it fly into the air because of the condensation on the bottle and hit the ground with a CRASH and broke, then Wolf's eyes turned red with rage....
-
So Fox sent him to anger management class.
-
But he yelled at the teacher so he was sent home.
-
But he yelled at his mom so he was sent away to a farm.
-
Wolf got a job herding sheep and was surprisingly good at it until he began eating them.
-
After he was fired by the farmer, Wolf looked into other jobs in the area, but he didn't have the lung capacity to be a home inspector, didn't like the taste of octogenarian women, and couldn't play three French horns at once (again, lung capacity, as well as lack of orifices).
-
Wolf got a job at The Chef's restaurant, of all places, cooking rabbit stew, exotic bird meat, and frogs' legs; meanwhile, Fox couldn't find his team anywhere.
-
So he went looking for them and eventually found Peppy...who had been chopped into a million pieces and stuffed inside a garbage bag.
-
But Fox was discovered when the new Garbage Boys, Leon and Panther, caught him.
-
Panther and Leon took Fox to a cliched room in the back alley, tied him down to a chair and then brought his severely beaten pal Slippy into the room.
-
"Slippy! What have they done to you!" cried Fox in alarm.
-
"Actually I just tripped and crashed into a wall while I wasn't looking," said Slippy.
-
With Sonic's help, Fox told Slippy that abusive relationships are no good.
-
"Hey, who are you?" said Fox to a guy with a green goattee and long blond hair laying next to them in a dark eco-injecting torture chair.
-
"I honestly have no idea because I was just randomly injected into the story," said the goatee man.
-
But then he whirled wildly around and killed a frog with one, swift stroke!
-
"Whoa, that was weird," said Fox as he and Slippy made their way out of the dark room tied to their chairs.
-
So to to put the story back on track, Fox and Slippy headed back to the watchtower where the rest of the JLN were gathering to await their next mission.
-
"Your mission is to infiltrate Arsenal Gear and disarm the terrorists," said Colonel Campbell to the JLN.
-
"Can the JLS come too?" asked Jak, who recruited Ratchet and Clank, Lara Croft, Crash Bandicoot, Tomba, Spyro the Dragon, and Sweet Tooth the Clown and followed Fox and Slippy to the meeting.
-
"Sorry, but you guys have the wrong watchtower", said Dr. Wright, the coodinator.
-
The JLN and JLS got mad at each other after Daxter said something nasty to Wario and a huge fight broke out!
-
While this was going on, the terrorists were succeeding at their plan!
-
Raiden was assigned to infiltrate Arsenal Gear and disarm Solidus Snake and his men, but his girliness prevented him from doing so; meanwhile, the JLS and JLN continued to to beat each other up after Kirby tore out a piece of paper from a phone book and gave Lara Croft a nasty paper cut!
-
But then Crash and Mario decided to break the ice and go get a beer.
-
But the beer only served to make them more violent and drunk.
-
So then they all randomly got up and started disco dancing while the song "Funky Town" was playing.
-
"Wait, this isn't violent!" said the narrator, who noticed that even though Mario and Crash were drunk, they weren't beating each other up.
-
They were actually trying to figure out a way to get their teammates to stop fighting as well as stop MushroomJunkie from derailing the story over and over.
-
So while MJ kept trying to derail the story, Solidus was succeeding with his plan to destroy New York with Arsenal's nuclear payload.
-
But then Kirby, who had been busy sucking up the blood from Lara Croft's papercut, decided to inhale the nuclear payload instead.
-
He became nuke Kirby, capable of detonating with a force of 50 teratons and wiping out all life as we know it.
(1 teraton is equivalent to a 2 km meteor going 2 km/s hitting the Earth, btw)
-
Then Kirby burped into space, releasing the energy and destroying an asteroid about to wipe out the planet, thus saving the world again (who knew, it was all gas!).
-
Unfortunately, Kirby was destroyed along with the asteroid; everyone except the terrorists came to his funeral.
-
But one terrorist came to his funeral and kidnapped kirby's dead body.
-
The terrorist was Fatman, who wanted to eat Kirby for dinner.
-
So everyone laughed as they watched the fat man run as fast as he could with a limp kirby.
-
(No, his name is actually Fatman. And he doesn't run, he roller-skates.)
Fatman tied Kirby's body to a bunch of C4 bombs and dared Wario (who was equally fat) to attack him.
-
But while he wasn't looking, Samus ate five dozen donuts, becoming morbidly obese so she could attack him.
-
Fatman was crushed by Samus, but the threat of the C4 bombs still loomed over our heros.
-
So samus ate them and they blew up inside her which made her die from internal bleeding but saving everyone else.
-
So then the Nintendo and Sony characters held a funeral for Samus, who had sacrificed herself (like Kirby) to save the rest of them.
-
Once the funeral was over, the JLS and JLN agreed never to fight one another again, and promptly went back to battling their respective arch-enemies.
-
"Wow, what a day," Mario said to Sonic, who had been absent because he neither belonged to Nintendo nor Sega.
-
But then, everyone noticed that the day didn't continue, but instead, froze at the point where the sun is at the highest point.
-
"Whoa, someone oughta take care of that," said Sonic to Mario, who both looked at each other and realized that the two of them were going to have to save the world again.
-
Then they realized it wasn't a sunset, it was midday--Lex Luthor (not taking into account the video-game heroes) had replaced the yellow sun with a red one to get Superman out of the way.
-
But then, it froze in Midday, because luigalaxy edited his post! (Yay for third person.)
-
And so Lex Luthor dimension-jumped to the real world to punish luigalaxy for ruining his evil scheme.
-
So he waved his finger at Luigalaxy and said "no, no. No ruining Lexie's evil sceme", which was Luigalaxy punishment.
-
Glorb blew up the red sun with his Earth Beam, which shoots out giant globes capable of destroying 10 naval ships in a row.
-
"Yay! It's the return of Glorb!" said a woman, not knowing it was really MEGAHank Deezshaw, the cyborg Glorb.
-
A Skuntank flicked the OFF switch on MEGAHank Deezshaw, the cyborg Glorb, causing him to turn off and implode into millions of tiny fragments.
-
The world floods with blarggs and lava!
-
"If you cause the story to go off course one more time, I swear I'll say something nasty," said PaperLuigi, who was absolutely sick of members causing the story to go off course with random events that had nothing to do with the plot.
-
Then TMK entered a cheesy story arc entitled "Reign of the Glorbmen" featuring Glorbboy, a clone, Glorbgirl, a protoplasmic female Glorb, and the Glorbinator, a Glorbian SarcasmTM bot.
-
"Something nasty," said PaperLuigi.
-
Then, Kimimaru remembered that the story had no direct plot or storyline; "Very similar to the Mario series indeed." said Kimimaru.
-
"I object to that!" cried CrossEyed7, desperately pulling out his 120-page timeline of the Mario series, wrought with odd stretches and flat-out made-up stuff.
-
So then a bunch of random characters that had never been introduced to the story came out of nowhere and did some stuff.
-
They saved the world yet again, allowing Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad to take the next step on their walk.
-
"Oh, no!" said Peach. "The next Mushroom Kingdom Tennis Tournament is taking place, and we're all late for it!"
-
But on the way there they met King Bomb-omb.
-
King Bob-omb threatened to blow himself up if he wasn't allowed to date Princess Peach for 5 minutes.
-
So he blew up and died. And the princess was safe.
-
"I really wanted to date him though," said Princess Peach.
-
"He really had an explosive personality, didn't he?" Daisy, who had appeared out of thin air due to the magic of animation, said.
-
"I guess I'll just have to settle for Bowser," said Peach; afterwords, Mario's jaw dropped down to the floor.
-
"Quick!" exclaimed Daisy, "Hide this story before Bowser/Peach fans from DeviantArt start drawing hideous Hentai scenes about it!"
-
"Quick!" exclaimed Daisy, "Hide this story before Bowser/Peach fans from DeviantArt start drawing hideous Hentai scenes about it!"
But it was too late! The DeviantArtists alreadys started and everyone at TMK was in for some very strange Hentai!
-
But Super Dude, formally known as Lizard Dude before a conveniently placed Smash Ball, attacked the artists before they could submit the disgusting Peach/Bowser porn!
-
"The winner is.... LIZARD DUDE!" said the Brawl announcer.
-
But before they can celebrate, the judges found out that the real winner was... Fox McCloud's father!
-
"How...random," said Mario. "Just like everything else in this Godforsaken story."
-
"I know." said Yoshi, who was juggling 4 carrots with a baseball bat.
-
Then Mallow tried to make a dramatic entrance, but he tripped and fell on his face and started crying.
-
Kung Fu Mario taught Mallow how to be a man and not cry when he gets hurt.
-
Mallow trained with Mario for 5 years until he became a master of martial arts and dramatic entrances.
-
"You have surpassed me," said Mario, right as a giant earthquake 2 miles away occured!
-
But then Groudon fainted, so the earthquake came to an abrupt end.
-
Groudon's defeat caused the story to go exceptionally insane, featuring Henry Heinz as the main character!
-
Everything was so insane that God decided to create something that would balance it out...
"AND IT SHALL BE CALLED...A PLOT."
-
Man then quickly found themselves sinning because they refused to acknowledge the plot.
-
So the story slipped into utter nonsense and Mario grew three heads.
-
"Mom! Help! I've got three heads!" shouted Mario, to which Mom replied, "There, there, there..."
-
Mario then grabbed a saw blade!
-
...and made himself a deli-style turkey sandwich.
-
"Mmm...this sandwich sure is tasty," said the first Mario head.
-
"Hey! Give me some of that!" said Mario head #2.
-
But Mario head #3 never got to taste anything because Sonic snatched the sandwich out of 3-headed Mario's hands; "You're too slow!" said Sonic.
-
Sonic took a bite out of the sandwich, not knowing that Mario had slipped hedgehog poison into it.
-
But before Sonic could digest the sandwich, Wario walked up to him and farted a mighty fart, which caused Sonic to barf it back out.
-
The barf's disgusting appearance caused Waluigi to use bold, italics, and underline all at the same time in his name!
-
Waluigi took Sonic over to the trash can so he could vomit without making a mess of things.
-
Sonic's barf was so fast it tore through the space-time continuum and opened a dimensional portal in the trash can!
-
Wario tried to jump into the portal, but his fat butt got stuck in the garbage can, temporary closing the gateway between dimensions.
-
Meanwhile, on the other end, Mr. Mxyzptlk started to nibble on Wario's feet, which he mistook for popsicles.
-
Wario was charging up a mighty Wario Waft, and when he unleashed it, Mr. M's damage percentage rose to 40!
-
Then Bowser appeared in a giant robot and spanked Wario out of the garbage can; temporarily opening the gateway between dimensions, which can be accessed by everyone!
-
So Sonic, Wario, Wolf O'donnell and Solid Snake jumped through the portal and ended up in Candy Land.
-
Wario immediately began to eat everything in sight, while Wolf started hitting on Queen Frostine.
-
A loud sound was heard and everyone halted what they were doing; it seemed like a giant monster of some sort!
-
Everyone nervously waited to see what horrendous monstrosity was approaching them; it turned out to be a living gigantic Pogo Stick with arms who goes by the name of Fredielos.
-
Waluigi then came through the portal to help them.
-
Inside the portal was the lair of the ungrateful tyrant, King Mimigaga, who dislikes everything except a bowl of socks filled with alfredo sauce and bologna on the side.
-
And then The Chef made his big reapperance and did it dramatically.
-
After The Chef dramatically made his big reappearance, a new Mario Kart tournament went underway, and some new characters in it included Wart, Toadsworth, a Thwomp, and a Pianta.
-
However, the Pianta refused to take part until he had half a watermelon, two grapefruit and a bunch of grapes for his breakfast, so the tournament was delayed until after lunch.
-
During the free time available, Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad went out for a walk.
-
"Look!" said Toad, "Another continuity reboot!"
-
And then, a speaker hidden in a tree blared: "The race is about to begin, please report to the first racing track: Noki Sea Course.
-
Noki Sea is flooded with giant Bloopers blinding people with their ink!
-
And gives water damage to the kart's engines, forcing them to swim.
-
The karts proceed to swim across the flooded bridge, with Bowser coming in first.
-
However, after a stewards inquiry, he was disqualified for cheating.
-
Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him as punishment.
...I'm going to die now, aren't I?
-
The kick sent Bowser flying out into space; back at the race, Birdo accidentally hit into a tree!
-
That sucks for Birdo!
-
But the tree was actually William Shatner in disguise, which sucks even more for Birdo, and also this story!
-
And then, to add to the cameos, Bruce Lee showed up out of no where!
-
And, also continuing the trend, Bill Murray and the Samurai Pizza Cats also appeared.
-
Closely followed by Ken Jennings, Queen Latifah, Strom Thurmond, and Gregor Mendel.
-
Bill Murray orders pizza and watches the Super Mario World cartoon show on an apple TV from Animal crossing he found in a trash can.
-
Suddenly, Steve Jobs sued Tom Nook for retroactive copyright infringement!
-
But Tom Nook claimed that he was only in a game, and the charges were lifted.
-
But then Nintendo sued him for stealing something from EarthBound!
-
But then Nintendo dropped the charges to keep up the facade that Earthbound/Mother doesn't exist.
-
So Tom Nook sued Nintendo due to the anguish caused by them for suing him in the first place.
-
Phoenix Wright got annoyed with all the cases he had to deal with that were about sueing, so he called them all off and ran home to get an ice cream sandwich.
-
Mr. Resetti then decided to take Tom Nook's case, and won by threatening to kill Nintendo's lawyer with his pick-axe.
-
Wario took Mr. Resetti's pickaxe and started mining for gold.
-
Resetti then bit Wario, causing Wario to suddenly drop the ice pick, which then Resetti picked it up and killed Wario with it.
-
Resetti quickly buried Wario's body and disposed of his pick-axe in the nearby river.
-
The pick-axe rusted, and killed the fish of the river, causing him to be arrested by the government for pollution.
-
Fortunately for him, Winston Payne was prosecuting, so Resetti was declared, 'Not Guilty'.
-
Then, an obscenely large can of tomato sauce crushed the court.
-
Several lawyers narrowly escaped the crushing, and sued the tomato sauce for violating obscenity standards.
-
However, the tomato sauce's lawyer, Mr. Meatball had another thing to say about that.
-
Then the poor Mr. Meatball rolled onto the escapees killing all the lawyers by accidentally being tipped by a rolling marble!
-
So started The Great Game of Pinball.
(Dear God! This thing is pretty much going straight off a cliff.)
-
But the player was terrible, so it soon became the great game-over screen.
-
The player reached a high score of only 020000 pts.
-
So then Donkey Kong came in and beat the game, with a highscore of 10932289328710994324326.45
-
But then the police arrested him for having a score ending in a decimal.
-
DK then sent a letter to Diddy, to help him break out of jail.
-
So started Donkey Kong Country 4: Diddy Kong's Revenge.
-
Which also included Dixie, Kiddy, Tiny, Lanky, Chunky, and Bob as playable characters.
-
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mariowiki.com%2Fimages%2Fc%2Fc6%2FUnusedKong.png&hash=713a5f835139794a52a719fc79204743)
Suddenly, Hat Kong arrived and demanded to be included in the game.
-
Suddenlier, all the monkeys were tranquilized and put into a zoo, quickly ending DKC4.
-
Thus, Hat Kong's new habadashery (located on the map screen) went out of business.
-
Hat Kong, who was strangely immune to the tranquilization, packed up his few remaining belongings (hats) into a bag on the end of a stick and started walking.
-
He walked and walked and walked until the blisters on his feet's blisters had blisters.
-
He was considered for DKC5, but since his feet had blisters, they took him out, and left it up to the fans to figure out his name and what his role would've been in the game.
-
Hat Kong soon got tired of Donkey Kong Country and soon started to make his own game, but sadly he ran out of money to sell it.
-
So he decided to set up his own haberdashery instead.
-
"Hopefully this doesn't go out of business like the last one," he said, not noticing that his sales were plummeting.
-
He hired Cranky Kong to help him sell more products.
-
But then the publisher suddenly got foreclosed so the game never made it to market.
-
Left with a certain amount of money to spend as he chose, Hat Kong decided to go and buy a hat -- but not just any hat!
-
It was a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious hat!
-
But then, Mary Poppins came in and bought every single one (saying we are in the US)... but paid in pounds!
-
Pounds of butter!
-
Hat Kong, angered at the entire situation, decided to put laxative in Mary Poppings' food.
-
But before he could slip the laxative in her dish, he slipped on some of the melted butter she had paid him with, making the laxative fly into his open mouth!
-
Needless to say, he had pretty bad diarrhoea the next day.
-
Having that much diarrhea flooded the cesspool, closing the entire city creating a snowball effect of disease killing thousands!
-
Except Chuck Norris, who just happened to be visting at that time.
-
He roundhouse-kicked the bacteria and saved everyone!
-
Once the city was quarantined, they didn't let anyone out, except for chuck norris.
-
King DeDeDe came in and crushed a building with his huge weight.
-
Chuck Norris narrowly dodged King Dedede's hammer that went flying.
-
And, King DeDeDe ate the cake that was on the inside.
-
Unfortunately, his actions caught the attention of the cake police, who put Dedede under arrest, for cake theft.
-
Dedede made a Portal joke, and the cake police hit him with a billy club, having heard such jokes far too many times in their line of work.
-
[:P] Meanwhile, Toad ate some laxatives, setting up for the next storyline.
-
But Lucas took over the storyline and created a huge mansion only for himself!
-
Which was demolished by Toad, in revenge for taking over the storyline.
-
Luigi then gave Lucas his mansion, causing Super Smash Bros. 4 to have Lucas' Mansion in it.
-
Alas, in the game it was downsized into a bungalow and was made of gingerbread...
-
Then Hansel and Gretel ate it and every contestant inside it (Captain Falcon, Kirby, Pit, and Deezer).
-
Captain Falcon tried to falcon kick his way out, while Kirby ate and copied Deezer.
-
Using Deezer's banning powers, Kirby banned Hansel and Gretel.
-
However, being inside Hansel (which I count as being apart of the body), this meant Deezer Kirby banned himself and caused a paradox, but God fixed the paradox by killing Hansel and Gretel.
-
Either way, the world was saved yet again... or was it?
-
It wasn't.
-
It was about this time that Peach woke up in the still-running shower...with only a goomba and a plastic spork for company - her secret habits were spinning wildly out of control.
-
A giant bowl of macaroni and cheese crashed into the middle of the Mushroom Kingdom, causing the Hotel Mario intro to start playing.
-
Which caused Mario to go even more insane than he usually is.
-
Which meant that Luigi had to rescue Peach instead.
-
And then Luigi met his twin, and the two Luigis set off to collect the Power Stars.
-
But, Goomba was arrested for harrasement, cause he was in the shower with Peach.
(Yeah, I just started another Pheonix Wright story. WHAT NOW.)
-
The trial was suspended indefinately while the Unreliable judge went on an anti-mushroom Tirade, and was promptly removed from service...
-
He then went on to invent Pop-Tarts, making millions.
-
He decided to use his millions to help poor orphaned baby Koopa Troopas, until...
-
...he developed a sudden urge to spend all of his money on coconut-flavored cupcakes, which he eventually put in the recycle, but it wasn't accepted by the recycle men.
-
So he started his own coconut cupcake recycling plant.
-
And went on to make even more millions. (Lolwut?)
-
It was a vicious cycle of million-making by masticating!
-
However, Wario, the notorious villian from the James Bond films, stole all of his millions, thus ending his cycle of million making.
-
"Help me, Mario!" cried the ex-judge, "Wario stole the money that I was planning to give to mushroom orphanage down the road!".
-
"Do I have to...?" Mario mumbled, watching T.V. and eating French Toast.
-
So Mario called Link, asking him to do it instead.
-
Link helped the ex-judge and threw a rock out a window in the ex-judge's house.
-
So the ex-Judge summoned a boulder to come crash on his head, killing Link instantly.
-
The millions of fragments from the boulder then rolled onto a nearby car cracking it's windows.
-
Some of the glass shards miraculously gathered to form a Tri-force and hovered over Link's body, magically reviving him.
-
Shots rang out!
-
Yes, it's true, Link got a revolver!
-
However, being made out of mayonnaise, it was useless.
-
However, Ganondorf thought it was real, and ran home to his mommy.
-
Wario, running off, saw a garlic store and stopped, but got tackled by Luigi, who tried to become the hero!
-
Waluigi came to Wario's aid by whacking Luigi with a Cheep Cheep!
-
Suddenly, Waluigi was wrestled to the ground by some PETA wacko...
-
However, Waluigi used his awesome skills to escape, and thus flee to Mexico.
-
Where he learnt the location of Mario's secret mushroom stash.
-
They were growing in his unkempt hair.
-
Little did Waluigi know that half of Mario's head was a machine (designed by some fat scientist guy named Robotnik who illegally operated on Mario after he was in a near fatal car crash) that contained the evil, demonic souls of all the mushrooms (basically the "hidden stash") he had eaten/consumed since then, and it could be shut off by a switch hidden within a firehouse in New York city.
-
He pushed it.
-
A red light began flashing inside the firehouse, a very loud siren went off, causing Waluigi and the gang to run out of the building, and Mario's head began throbbing!
-
Then, I appeared and did a quick and shameless plug for my SSB Live program.
-
The shameless plug attempted to grow to a magnificent size (thus becoming a huge/important announcement) and eat Yoshi's head, but it failed when the demons busted through Mario's head and spread throughout New York.
-
It was at that moment that the world seemed to end at the hands of the demons, but not before Mario woke up from his slumber and revealed that it was all just a horrible nightmare which resulted from eating some three day old ravioli the night before.
-
"Wow, I'm never gonna eat that again," said Mario as he went to the fridge to eat some more of the three day old ravioli.
-
Toad came running into the room, shouting "Mario! We need your heeeeeelp!", during which he clumsily smacked into Mario, knocking the ravioli out of his hands and onto Luigi's head.
-
It smelled so bad that Luigi threw up, prompting everyone else in the room to throw up also.
-
Then their puke burned a hole through the floor and they fell into the basement and discovered a door to another dimension.
-
Which led back to Mario's so-called "dream" where the demons were spreading throughout New York.
(My best explanation for this is Mario was hallucinating that he had an old plate of ravioli because the demons busted his head open)
-
Immediately, Peter Parker suited up and came to the rescue as Spiderman.
-
But it was all a lie, because everybody knows that Peter Parker is actually Spider-Man.
-
Spiderman webbed up the cretin who forgot to hypen his name.
-
The Ghostbusters showed up to help deal with the demon problem while Spider-Man finished webbing up the cretin.
-
Prof. E Gadd acted as the Ghostbusters mission control, while Luigi went in to the portal to assist them.
-
Luigi was sporting his Poltergeist 3000, which looked a little dorky compared to Venkman's proton pack, but it was the best he could muster.
-
With that, the five heroes venture forth into the portal, ready to battle any and all demons that stood in their way.
-
Thus resulting in the long awaited Ghostbusters 3.
-
Which was so successful, that it meant Luigi was more famous than his brother, Mario.
-
Mario began to cry and Luigi was made the honorary 6th member of the Ghostbusters team (even though Louis Tully's enrollment in GBII wasn't official).
-
Which prompted Nintendo to release their next major Mario game in form of a crossover: Super Mario Bros. & Ghostbusters: The Ultimate Team.
-
However, since Luigi was more famous than Mario, the game's name was changed to Super Luigi, Ghostbusters and random fat plumber guy in red: The Ultimate Team.
-
Sarah Palin is defeated by Joe Biden in 2008 election.
EDIT: lol whoops.
-
"Hey, wait a minute," said a kibitzer, "I think you put that in the wrong topic!"
-
"Oh shoot," said PL, who began rolling on the floor laughing at his mistake (meanwhile, Mario was living as a mattress salesman in Bee Cave, Texas because he lost his job).
-
But then, Mario is caught sleeping on the job and is fired by Wart (the mattress store owner).
-
Wario saw that Mario was down on his luck due to his brother's huge boost in fame, so he offered him a job at a local McDonald's (where he was the assistant manager); unfortunately, Wario ate all of the burgers and got the both of them fired.
-
So Wario and Mario went on the road together, looking for work and a life of prosperity, thus beginning "Mario & Wario 2: Partners in Poverty"
-
The next day, Wario was digging with his big mouth and chipped a tooth while finding a shiny black warp pipe...
-
Mario was curious and went down the black hole, but when Wario tried he got stuck.
-
Mario would up in the ever-cliched "Nega-verse", where everything was opposite....so the evil Oiram was trying to kidnap Princess Hcaep, when the heroic Reswob showed up to stop him!
-
It was then that Mario realized that he could shine as a new hero in the "Nega-verse" since his brother, Luigi, stole his thunder back at TMK.
-
Unfortunately, Mario looked just like Oiram, so the people there tried to arrest him; meanwhile, Wario had squeezed his way through the black pipe, and attempted to save Mario from being arrested by using the infamous Wario Waft.
-
Wario and Reswob manage to save both Mario and Princess Hceap and escape to a secret sky tower where a cranky old Toad has bad news to share...
-
Htorwstoad started by saying, 'Oh my gosh, its Oiram!" and called Nega-Kingdom police.
-
The police showed up to arrest Mario (who Htorwsdaot thought was Oiram) but he was saved by none other than Super Luigi and the Ghostbusters, who had discovered the black pipe using the PKE meter.
-
Suddenly, Mario was overcome by extreme jealousy and socked Luigi with a giant boxing glove and sent him flying out a glass window and into a piranha garden.
-
Luigi, however, had a newly acquired proton pack that allowed him to destroy the piranhas easily; he then came back with a giant boxing glove and socked Mario out a glass window (wait, are they even inside a building?) and into a gorilla cage.
-
Said cage turned out the be the prison where the evil Gnok Yeknod was sent by the good Loor K. after he tried to steal his Pineapple Hoard.
-
Gnok Yeknod attempted to rip Mario to shreds, but Egon and Ray crossed the streams and blasted him with their proton packs; this caused life to stop instantaneously, and every molecule in Gnok's body exploded at the speed of light.
-
Which left Mario dazzled and confused.
-
So Mario went to the local scientist, Ddag E., and asked if he could explain what happened.
-
Ddag .E didn't feel like explaining everything that happened so he smacked Mario with a newly invented memory-fan and all was well again.
-
Meanwhile, Wario was give the task of cleaning up Yeknod's remains, and Ddag E. attacked Mario because he was evil!
-
Wario slipped and fell into the pile of remains he was shoveling.
-
This caused him to become horribly diseased.
-
He was quickly rushed to the Nega Kingdom's hospital...
-
Of course, since this was the Nega Kingdom's hospital, it wasn't really a hospital at all, but a laboratory full of crazed scientists who refused to take the Hippocratic Oath.
-
This meant Mario had to make it past Ddag E. before Wario's fate was sealed!
-
Luigi and the Ghostbusters conveniently showed up at Ddag's hideout to steal Mario's kill, but Mario shouted "NOT TODAY!" and blasted Ddag with a fireball.
-
Mario used the intelligence that earned him his doctor's degree to build a portal made from spare parts around the lab that would take everyone home.
-
...but they first had to save Wario from the Nega-Hospital, and time was running out...
-
"Aw, screw Wario," said Luigi, but Mario had already lept into action.
-
Little did they know that the Nega-Verse was merely a tangent to the real world that would only exist another hour!
-
Mario broke the forth wall and store at PL, and said, "Excuse me?"
-
"Store at PL?" asked PL. "I'm not sure what that means."
-
At this point Mario got really ****ed, and threw a fireball at PL.
-
PL caught on fire and died a horrible and painful death; furthermore, no one came to his funeral.
-
This made the locals mad, so they burned an effigy of Mario in the town square.
-
Except it turned out to be the real Mario, although in his Fire suit, he can't be hurt by fire!
-
"That was kind of pointless," declared one of the locals "...but screw it, let's burn more stuff because we only have an hour left to live anyway!"
-
And so, everyone went on a burning spree and the entire earth caught on fire and became a giant fireball...and the sun's wife.
-
But the Freeze part of the Freeze Flame Galaxy crashed into the Earth!
-
Since this was the Nega-Verse, the freeze part of the Freeze Flame Galaxy was actually the flame part!
-
This made the Sun very mad, so he decided to go supernova.
-
This lessened the time the Nega-Verse had to live from 45 minutes to 8 minutes!
-
Peach and Bloo just got caught in the supernova!
-
"Who's Bloo?" asked Wario as he tried to find a portal back to the real world so that he, Mario, Luigi and the Ghostbusters wouldn't get fried.
-
Just then, the TARDIS flew down from the sky and landed right in front of Wario, Mario, Luigi and the Ghostbusters, and out stepped the Doctor and Sarah Jane Smith.
-
"What a twist!" declared Mario.
-
"Oh, looks like we shouldn't be here," the Doctor said, "Let's go, Sarah Jane."
-
As they left, the Nega-Verse began collapsing in on itself and only had about 2 minutes left to live.
-
Within those two minutes, the Unicron Singularity (http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Unicron_Singularity) appeared and sucked everything up, resetting all of time itself from the very beginning:
Many of you may remember the old Mario Story... while not as legendary as Chocobo's Mario Word Association or Mario Bar, it still had a place in everyone's heart... or at least mine anyways.
Here goes:
Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad went out for a walk.
-
"NO!" said PaperLuigi, who was tired of seeing a good story die as a result of it getting restarted from the beginning.
-
So FBM leaped out of nowhere with a time machine that warped everyone back to the Nega-verse once again!
-
Then it appeared they only had 5 minutes until the Nega-Verse exploded...but we're talking Frieza time here, so in reality, there was nothing to fear for at least the next 3 hours.
-
So during that time, Mario and the gang sat around a campfire roasting mushrooms and marshmallows...
-
Meanwhile, outside the boundaries of the story, The Chef tried to explain to PL that the reason he wanted to restart the story was because it wasn't getting good at all and needed it's slate wiped clean....again.
-
(TC...you do realize that you've restarted the story more than any other member who posts in this topic, right?)
Mario and the gang ate the marshmallows and then tried to come up with a harebrained escape plan that might just work!
-
Wario then shouted, "I have an idea!"
-
Using his insane and contradicting logic, Wario was able to come up with a plan that got them absolutely nowhere, so they assigned Captain Falcon, knower of all things, to come up with a better one.
-
He FALCON PAWNCHED Freiza in the face, which ended the effects of his time-freezing ability, and everyone was sent back to the regular-verse.
-
But someone from the nega-verse followed them back to the real world...
-
It was Oiram, who wanted to kidnap Peach AND Daisy and then rule the Mushroom Kingdom!
-
...and he did, which caused Bowser to get really angry and ask Mario and Luigi to captain his latest airship armada.
-
Mario and Luigi then agreed to captain the armada from Bowser's Death Star.
-
Meanwhile, Bowser assembled an emergency meeting of villains to put Oiram back in his place.
-
Oiram, however, did the same thing and organized a bunch of villains from his world who had conveniently survived the destruction of the Nega Verse!
-
Just before he could call a meeting however, Oiram was assassinated by his older brother Igiul.
-
Igiul was 1,000 times more evil than Oiram!
-
Fortunately for our heroes, Igiul was too arrogant to ask for help, and destroyed all the villains Oiram assembled.
-
Unfortunately, Igiul was able to destroy all of the villains with one swipe of his hand in .02 seconds, which meant that he was not only 1,000 times eviler than Oiram, but 1,000 times stronger too.
-
"What do we do now?" Ganondorf asked Bowser.
-
"We run like hell!" suggested Bowser, who tried to run; unfortunately, he was far too fat and Igiul caught up with him.
-
Then the TARDIS flew down from the sky and out stepped the Doctor and Donna Noble.
-
They flew away promptly after Igiul punched Bowser's head off.
-
Seeing that Igiul was too strong, Mario and Oriam teamed up to take down the brothers they secretly hated.
-
This didn't happen, however, because Oiram had been assassinated a few posts back.
-
So Mario revived Bowser with a life shroom and teamed up with and his troops and blasted Igiul to smithereens and won. THE END.
I'm sick of this game.
-
This topic has been around longer than you've been a member, bub. It ain't stopping just 'cause you said so.
Some villains like Bowser and Oiram desire money and power; however, Igiul is different...he just wants to watch the world burn.
-
And so, he watched the world burn on his new HD wide screen television while eating popcorn and drinking mayonnaise.
-
"Wait, what am I doing?" said Igiul, who was merely imagining himself watching TV; thus, he sped off to destroy the world's cities with his awesome power.
-
And so Igiul set fire to the world and everyone on the once beautiful planet.
-
"Beautiful? That's debatable," said Al Gore, who came out of nowhere with a chart about global warming.
-
Al Gore's ridiculous theories were defeated by the brilliant minds of Dr. Mario and E. Gadd, who then turned their attention to stopping Igiul.
I'm a little bitter about this "global warming" nonsense... I hope it didn't show.
-
"Ridiculous and nonsensical? That's debatable," said Leonardo Dicaprio, a well known actor and environmental activist in today's world.
-
But Dr. Mario and E. Gadd ignored him, since Igiul was currently throwing fireballs the size of mini-vans at them.
-
Evidently, Igiul's fireballs caused the global warming catastrophe to worsen.
-
The ice world started to melt, which caused a great flood to wash over the mushroom kingdom.
-
The polar bears all died, but the warm weather made Igiul drowsy and peace-loving, and so the world was saved thanks to global warming.
-
Igiul quickly snapped out of his "peace-loving" mode and continued to destroy the world.
-
He started by destroying the most important city of all.
-
New York City becomes destroyed by acid rain.
-
In an attempt to destroy Igiul, They decided to bring in a butt-load of cameos, starting with Chuck Norris, and Captain Falcon.
-
Toad was also a cameo, and he jumped in a giant mushroom spaceship similar to the ones found in Super Mario Galaxy!
-
Chuck Norris and Captain Falcon, however, had decided they had not liked working together, and instead held a staring contest; at last report, the death toll was 100 million and rising, causing Toad to attempt to escape in his wonderous spaceship.
-
His spaceship, however, could not clear the atmosphere before the earth exploded.
-
As he was flung from the planet and his spaceship, Toad decided to break the law of having to breathe air, so that he may survive in space.
-
Toad saw Wario in space, who was still alive because he was breathing his own farts.
-
They decided to get into a sissy slap fight, because of what happened 5 years ago in Wario's Woods.
-
One slap caused them to fly apart, dooming Wario and Toad to drift alone forever.
-
Toad began to eat his own FLESH!
-
Then he realized how disgusting that was, and was rescued by Rosalina and the Lumas (not that his realization caused the rescue).
-
Unfortunately, he had already eaten his entire head.
-
So Rosalina put him in the paradox-reversal machine, returning his FLESH to normal.
-
Rosalina looked at Toad seriously, and said, in a hopeful voice, "Toad, with your flesh returned to normal... I think we might stand a chance of saving Earth."
-
Meanwhile, Wario was floating alone in space and nearly dead; however, a giant spacecraft came out of nowhere and abducted his frozen body.
-
The amateur bounty hunter, not recognizing Wario's infamous visage, chopped his body up and sold it as scrap FLESH to a nomad troupe of professional FLESH-buyers... one might even call them proFLESHinals.
-
However, some wizard guy cast a spell on Wario's body before being chopped up, causing the bits of FLESH to grow and mutate into millions of malicious mini-Warios!
-
Hilarity ensued.
-
The mini-Warios decided to attack Earth, which was being reconstructed by the heroic Toad and his pal Rosalina.
-
Rosalina powered up the mega-super-hyper-ultra-powerful observatory cannon, which draws upon the power of SigurdHosenfeld's lewd fan art, to end the threat in one fell swoop.
-
Meanwhile, the amateur bounty hunter who found Wario in space was off to kick some criminal butt, so nobody had to worry about her sticking around.
-
And kick butt she did; meanwhile, the mega-super-hyper-ultra-powerful observatory canon fired, only to miss the mini-Warios and hit the bounty hunter's spaceship!
-
In fact, this whole story is non-canonical!
-
"I see what you did there," said one of the mini-Warios.
-
All the mini-Warios ran away when they saw Pigma approaching them in his Wolfen ship, which he stole.
-
Pigma lost control of his ship and crashed into Rosalina's Earth, setting in motion a cataclysmic extinction event!
-
All the Luma's were wiped out, except the one who Rosalina had managed to take with her in a spaceship.
-
Rosalina hadn't cried so hard since her mother was eaten by wild Bidoofs.
-
While she was crying (and not paying attention) one of the mini-Warios climbed aboard and began piloting the spaceship towards the sun!
-
Oikonny confronted the spaceship while it was on its way to the sun!
-
"Uncle Andross!" he cried as he accidentally flew past Rosalina's ship and into an asteroid.
-
Space leeches fed on his
corpse FLESH!
-
Suddenly the spaceship was attacked by a band of Space Pirates, fresh from having their sorry arses whooped by Samus Aran.
-
Since Samus had already kicked their asses, the space pirates were easy pickings for Rosalina's magic.
-
After dealing with the space pirates, Rosalina decided to brutally murder all Bidoofs.
-
Suddenly Rosalina died from the germs bred by the Bidoofs.
-
The Lumas and the mini-Warios were all very sad, so they held a funeral for Rosalina.
-
The (now vaccinated) Lumas and mini-Warios finished the job Rosalina set out to do.
-
However, unbeknownst to them, a single Bidoof had survived and had hidden itself on board the ship, plotting revenge.
-
It suffered a series of ultimately fatal heart attacks, ending the Bidoof menace for good.
-
Everyone was sad, so they held a funeral.
-
Thus, everyone became happy!
-
They were happy because the dead Bidoofs would feed their family for months!
-
Suddenly they recieved an incoming message.
-
"Those tin cans are no match for me!" said the message.
-
The venerable group experienced a bit of subconsciously-simian anxiety, but couldn't quite remember who or what the mysterious message was related to.
-
"Oh, come on," said a new message, "why does no one ever recognize me in my bright purple garb and impossibly crooked mustache?"
-
"Oh, that must be Luigi in his Halloween costume," said Mega Man.
-
Then the poor, unrecognized messenger committed suicide because he wasn't loved.
-
PaperLuigi facepalmed because Turtlekid1 thought the messenger who said "Those tin cans are no match for me!" was Waluigi.
-
The REAL unrecognised messenger quickly flew out of a wormhole, before opening his mouth and sucking in gigantic amounts of air and swatting with two large disembodied hands.
-
The two large disembodied hands turned out to be the Crazy Hand and the Master Hand and became angry killing the real messenger.
-
Crazy Hand and Master Hand were so weak, they also defeated themselves without taking even 1% damage.
-
After that, they decided to play a little friendly game of rock, paper, scissors.
-
Both did rock, smashing Link and Roy between themselves. (But R0y haz fIRE!)
-
Then both did scissors, and the results were so graphic that the next Super Smash Bros. sequel was rated M (for Mature)
-
However, Mario refused to be featured in a M rated title; therefore, he left Nintendo forever.
-
Unfortunately, he joined Sega, who ruined him even more quickly than they had ruined Sonic!
-
Sega then tried to purchase Nintendo, but Link, Kirby and Pikachu attacked Sega's headquarters in an attempt to get Mario back!
-
However, Sega was prepared for the attack, due to Waluigi tipping off one of the secretaries.
-
"[darn] you Waluigi!" said Link, who appointed himself Supreme Commander of the Nintendo Army after Mario joined Sega.
-
So Link shot Waluigi through the heart with a light arrow; there was much rejoicing.
-
Waluigi's body began to melt due to the light arrow's magnificent, heavenly glow, and he suffered greatly until nothing was left but his skeleton.
-
He became Dry Waluigi, who decided to fight for Nintendo!
-
However, Kirby (who was a libertarian) began questioning Commander Link's decision to put Dry Waluigi in the army, as Dry Waluigi had no brain and therefore could not make his own choices.
-
So Kirby inhaled Dry Waluigi and became Dry WaKirby, who was immortal AND had a brain!
-
Pikachu accused Colonel WaKirby of cannibalism and decided to create his own independent guerilla army to battle Sega and Nintendo; furthermore, he changed his name to Pikache Guevara!
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi40.tinypic.com%2Fe98c3s.jpg&hash=56dba9c4c62df5f32eefa6959ffcca38)
-
Ash's Uberchu joined Pikache Guevara and won many major victories.
-
Pikache and Uberchu's campaign took a turn for the worst when, after battling Sega's 45th Infantry Division Tet 68-69 (led by Major Miles "Tails" Prower), they entered the Kongo Jungle and were bit by a swarm of mosquitos.
-
Malaria happened.
-
The team's medic, Ness, was able to heal most of Pikache's troops with PK Lifeup Ω.
-
But Uberchu died, and that spelled disaster for Pikache Guevara.
-
Without Uberchu, Pikache was forced to lead alone; meanwhile, Supreme Commander Link was preparing to attack Lieutenant Alex Kidd and his forces at dawn!
-
Supreme Commander Link led a suprise attack on Lieutenant Alex Kidd and his forces, making them surrender and give up all of their bagels!
-
The bagels were used as rations by Colonel Kirby and Commander Link; meanwhile, Pikache was trudging through the thick Kongo Jungle.
-
The next morning, vomiting noises could be heard throughout the Nintendo Camp; the bagels had been poisoned!
-
Lieutenant Kidd had gotten his revenge despite being a POW; Commander Link and Colonel Kirby lost approximately 5,000 of their 30,000 men army to the poisoned bagels.
*PaperLuigi sheds a tear for those lost during the Great Bagel Massacre of the Nintendo-Sega War*
-
However, Nintendo was far from defeated; Kirby led a small strike force consisting of Bowser, RED, and Samus in a non-poisoned-bagel raid on Sega HQ.
-
However, Mario
(now a general in the Sega Army)(now the Supreme Dictator of Sega Land II) was prepared and ordered a fleet of stealth aircraft to carpet bomb Kirby's strike force!
-
Kirby inhaled the bombs and became Bomb Kirby, making matters even worse for Sega.
-
"Oh this is bad," sweated Supreme Fuhrer Sonic, now sporting a Hitler-esque mustache.
-
DryWaBomb Kirby launched an attack on the HQ, which began to slowly collapse around Sonic and Mario.
-
"I had it better at Nintendo!" said Mario, who quickly defected back.
-
Sonic, however, escaped the doomed structure and decided to randevu with the rest of his army in Sega Land's capital; however, Major Tails and Admiral NiGHTS were killed by the collapsing HQ.
-
Just then, Pikache found his way out of the jungle and decided to rejoin his forces with the Nintendo army, since both parties had suffered heavy casualties.
-
"As long as I am permitted to start my own country after this war, I'll team up with you again," said Pikache to Link.
-
"Fine," said Link, "but you can't have Hyrule. Now let's go destroy that annoying hedgehog!"
-
Link turned his head and found that Sonic had retreated to the unknown depths of Mobius!
-
Sonic and his forces, now in Sega Land's capital (Mobius), were on the defensive; Link had no choice but to lead his army through unknown territory!
-
Little did they know, Dr. Robotnik had set traps throughout the area because he knew Nintendo's forces would be SNOOPING AS USUAL.
-
"That's no good...for them!" laughed Sonic as Robotnik armed the traps!
-
Then a choir of a thousand Robotniks appeared and sung Bohemian Rhapsody while only using the word pingas.
-
"Wow, that was random," said Link as he moved his army through Sega's Desert of Doom.
-
BP smote Link for misusing the word "random"; the Nintendo army was now without one of their key players.
-
Without Link, DryWaKirby decided to drop DryWa from his name and assume leadership of the Nintendo Army.
-
Kirby accidently walked into one of the traps and was crushed by a thousand pounds of Jell-O.
-
He was healed by Ness and the army continued with their march.
-
"Alright, that psychic kid has to go!" roared Sonic as he learned of the assassination attempt's failure.
-
"I'll do it, mein Führer!" roared Knuckles, now known as "Knuckles the Red Baron!"
-
Link's uncle, Rabbi Schmeckle Feinbergawitz, suddenly became uneasy upon hearing this.
-
The Rabbi enlisted the help of a certain World War I Flying Ace and his Sopwith Camel; that's right, the comics world had entered the war!
-
The Nintendo-Sega War was renamed "The Fictional War to End All Fictional Wars" in light of this new development.
-
The war ended when Silver Age Superman of DC comics told both sides to reconcile or he'd push the earth into the sun.
-
"That's too anti-climatic," everyone said, so they did the unexpected and pushed Silver Age Superman into the sun!
-
Silver Age Superman decided to screw them and build a new fortress in the sun, since most fictional works today deserve to be killed in war anyway.
-
Then everyone decided to band together and strike down any new cartoon created after 2005.
-
But their efforts failed, as Batman swooped in and used his government sirens to force the group of fictional characters to disappear!
-
After they disappeared back into their own world, the Sega and Nintendo characters decided to end the war with a peace treaty.
-
Russia broke the treaty.
-
The treaty broke Russia right back.
-
A new war had begun, but one no one cared about; meanwhile, Sega was planning a new Sonic game...
-
...which was to be the first in the series to receive an AO (Adults Only) rating from the ESRB.
-
The game was released to rave reviews, signaling a new era in Sonic's long and insipid history.
-
But all the fans whined about the explicit scene involving Sonic and Amy Rose, as well as Shadow's major role in the plotline.
-
They also complained about the fact that Sonic had a new weapon, which turned some away from the game like it was Sonic and the Black Night.
-
The fans were also not pleased with Robotnik's new appearance:
(https://themushroomkingdom.net/board/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwalterfootball.com%2Fimages%2Flook0603.jpg&hash=1f7534893d6a825b2ba3cc3484ff1e39)
-
All of the displeased fans left Sega, which quickly became bankrupt.
-
Sonic was left without a home and was forced to live in a dumpster.
-
Knuckles managed to eke out a living selling crack cocaine until eventually being busted by the police, Amy resorted to whoring herself on the streets of Manhattan, and Tails simply took his own life out of desperation.
-
However, Dr. Robotnik's ambition did not die with Sega; thus, he proceeded with his plan for world domination by kidnapping President Obama.
-
Obama escaped Robotnik's clutches with the power of
socialism HOPE.
-
-FoxMcCloud- directed Turtlekid1 over to the "Not At The Dinner Table" board, and Dr. Robotnik was killed by the Secret Service.
-
Fortunately for Robotnik, one of his robots revived him by repairing the damaged area of his dead body, which was his PINGAS.
-
He opted for PINGAS enlargement surgery, but it was to no avail.
-
Robotnik was completely broke and without a home, so he got a job working at Mcdonalds; furthermore, he assumed management and made the restaurant his secret pancake house.
-
Not surprisingly, someone had a problem with this.
-
The Man was tryin' to keep our boy Robotnik down.
-
So Robotnik punched The Man in the face.
-
The McDonald's was condemned and shut down by Al Gore, who said that the building was emitting too many greenhouse gases.
-
Al Gore was shut down by The Man for emitting too much bull[dukar].
-
Without Al Gore around, everyone stopped caring about global warming and the world burned to a crisp.
-
Global warming was defeated by the overwhelming coolness of Chuck Norris and Batman fighting crime together.
-
Chuck Norris, now 70, threw his back out while trying to punch global warming in the face.
-
Batman left Global Warming bloodied and broken, lying on the street, and drove Chuck Norris to the hospital in the batmobile.
-
The Batmobile ran on gas which fueled Global Warming and regenerated him!
-
The knowledge of there still being evildoers to whup revitalized Chuck Norris.
-
Knowing this would be his final battle, Chuck Norris leapt from the Batmobile Captain Falcon style and prepared to hit Global Warming with a devastating Falcon Punch.
-
Instead of an unexpected plot twist happening, Chuck Norris actually succeeded and killed Global Warming with the punch.
-
Then he died because the punch was too much for his decrepit body to handle; this, of course, made Batman very sad.
-
Batman shouted out a big "NO" that made Darth Vader's sound like a fly's heartbeat.
-
My last threee comments in this thread were posted under the mistaken impression that this was Endless Rock-Paper-Scissors... Whoops. Anyways,
At that very moment, Turtlekid's avatar rushed into the Batcave and threw up all over the carpet.
-
The vomit froze in midair, because now that Global Warming had been destroyed, the Ice Age was free to unleash its wrath upon the world.
-
At that very moment the universe imploded on itself causing the story to reset; one day Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toad...AWW F*** IT, EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE DIED, THE END!
-
After Shroomy95 was banned for never making a single useful contribution to the board, Turtlekid's avatar received a SEVERE scolding.
-
The Ice Age had to be stopped.
-
There was only one person who they could call:
-
Sadly, Chuck Norris had died not five minutes earlier, so the earth had to settle for a demon-possessed Tickle-Me-Elmo doll.
-
But as we all know, Chuck norris can NEVER die because it is physically impossible, rendering the previous sentence pointless.
P.S. F*** you, weegee
-
Shroomy95 died for being an ass to Weegee; furthermore, Elmo unleashed a Harlem beatdown on Ice Age.
-
Then Shroomy95 revived himself with the almighty power of the 1-UP, killed PaperLuigi and Weegee, and left this tread, never to be seen again.
-
Everyone rejoiced.
-
PaperLuigi and Weegee's sould were at ease, knowing that they had sacrificed themselves for a worthy cause.
-
Unfortunately, everyone had spent so much time arguing with each other, that Elmo had gotten bored and sided with the Ice Age, which, of course, presented another problem.
-
The problem was solved with a poorly-written Crisis On Infinite Fungi Forums.
-
Mario then began to recollect his first experience with drugs.
-
That mushroom from the second "?" block in 1-1 had taken him on such a great trip.
-
"I so wish to do some more!" he shouted as he invited Wario and Luigi over to get high.
-
...In the sky with some Spring Mushrooms.
-
Wario was higher than a kite and Luigi was flat out stoned; however, Mario was having trouble "reaching" his desired "destination" and needed an extra boost.
-
Mario quickly devoured several Super Leaves from his inventory.
-
Soon after, Mario got a case of the munchies and decided to devour a few Toads; Luigi and Wario laughed.
-
That is, until Mario decided to devour them next!
-
Mario ate them and gained 500 pounds because Wario and Luigi were high in calories.
-
He lost all the weight and more within the span of six weeks, and thus became the new Kirstie Alley.
-
Mario posed for the camera when suddenly Luigi and Wario burst from his chest Alien style.
-
Mario was mortified, knowing that his budding modelling career was crushed.
-
However, a special effects talent scout was in the audience and hired the three instantly, believing the display had been an illusion.
-
Mario was rapidly loosing blood so he had to go to the hospital first.
-
But the talent scout, being one of that illogical and insane Hollywood lot, ignored Mario's needs and drove him to the studio instead.
-
But Wario, much to the dismay of the prissy talent scout, grabbed the wheel and drove them to the hospital; unfortunately, Mario lacked health insurance and could not pay for an operation.
-
Thus began the all-new WarioWare: Pay for Mario's New Lungs!
Or Wario Land, if you're Tv_Themes.
-
Wario made billions and decided to hire a private doctor to fix Mario's ailments.
-
That doctor was Dr. Mario. There was blood everywhere.
EVERYWHERE.
-
Dr. Mario was Mario so Wario basically hired Mario to heal himself.
HIMSELF.
-
It worked because Mario is just that awesome; but then the talent scout realized Mario wasn't actually a special effects whizz, so the deal was off.
-
Then Louis from Left 4 Dead stole Dr. Mario's pills!
-
But just before he could run off with the goods, he caught a bad case of the AIDS and died.
-
Dr. Mario was determined to avenge Louis and destroy AIDS once and for all.
-
Dr. Mario released a shot which, under the guise of being a H1N1 vaccine, actually made everyone asexual; AIDS quickly died out.
-
The human race died out because everyone stopped having sex; God lol'd.
-
Sponges retook their place as the world's dominant species.
-
And the most happenin' sponge of them all was PapertowelBill QuadrilateralTrousers.
-
And that is a very difficult name to type so we'll just call him "PQ."
-
In any case, said happenin' sponge lived in a coconut above the sea.
-
Then the unthinkable happened.
-
A human appeared, wandering the wastelands!
-
A team of elite sponge-soldiers attempted to dispatch the mysterious figure, but it retaliated with a devastating roundhouse kick.
-
With that one kick, the man had not only obliterated the squad sent to kill him, but he also caused the entire sponge military severe headaches and stomach pains; the sponges' only hope was PQ!
-
Sadly PQ was kind of a nerd and wanted to go count sand grains instead.
-
Thus, the red-bearded stranger saved humanity once again, or at least what was left of it.
-
Chuck Norris formed man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being.
-
Chuck Norris then formed woman from a dead ninja's spine, and, seeing that what he made was good, he then proceeded to have sex with woman.
-
Since there were no ninjas before creating man, Chuck Norris merely imagined himself having sex with the woman.
-
As Chuck often - and I mean quite often - does.
-
"Chuck is getting rather senile in his old age," said God as he witnessed the breakdown of his greatest creation.
-
It took weeks for the foot-shaped imprint subsequently left in God's cheek to fade.
-
God, feeling more generous all of a sudden, created a woman for Chuck.
-
And by "woman", he meant "women".
-
72 virgin women to be precise.
-
Three and a half hours later, they were just 72 women.
-
"It took you that long?" laughed God.
-
"Shut up," said Chuck, "It took me three hours, twenty-nine minutes, and 59 seconds to calm them down before I could do anything with 'em."
-
Unfortunately, this left almost no time to prepare, and the prom's TOMOROW! :O
-
So Mario and friends (and enemies) reappeared to throw the *****ingnest Megaprom the universe has ever seen!
-
God was the DJ.
-
Shroomy95 returned to help with turning the run down gym into the ultimate party place, with the help of his trusty shrooms of course.
-
The shrooms caused Shroomy95 to get high and do a less than stellar job on renovating the gym.
-
As a quick fix, he gave the shrooms to everyone attending, who, in their delusions, saw the gym as the greatest party locale ever.
-
As per usual, the Goombas weren't invited in accordance with the Mushroom Kingdom's apartheid laws.
-
So in their RAAAAAAGE, they started destroying Toad Town with a...
(OMG SUSPENSE)
-
The letter a and three periods thoroughly destroyed Toad Town.
-
Mind you, just one of Peach's periods was nearly enough to do that.
-
All the Toads that survived bowed down before Weegee's joke.
-
Weegee was elevated to deity status.
Meanwhile, back at the prom, which surprisingly, was not fazed by the attack, Mario drank 50 beers.
More chaos ensued.
-
Mario died and promptly became the centerpoint of a new Weekend At Bernies scheme.
-
However, his entrails ruptured from alcoholic oversaturation before they could do anything with him.
-
The entrails were taken to a biology lab for examination.
-
They sprang to life and attacked the surgeons, leaving one dead and several wounded.
-
Mario's intestines eventually merged, formed a collective consciousness and became the host of their own successful talk show.
-
While that was going on, Mario's hallow body was cremated and buried in a cemetery.
-
Several weeks later, his ashes were exhumed and snorted by Keith Richards.
-
Mario's soul took over Keith's body.
-
His first single is expected to debut later this month. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOGG3wOG_bk&feature=related)
-
Then Keith Richards and Mick Jagger started punching question blocks and...well, you see where this is going.