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Author Topic: "The Nintendo Commandments"  (Read 13491 times)

ShadowBrain

  • Ridiculously relevant
« on: June 14, 2008, 09:29:53 AM »
"Mario is your oyster." ~The Chef

MaxVance

  • Vance Vance Revolution
« Reply #1 on: June 14, 2008, 09:44:19 AM »
Interesting how most of these were in the early-mid '90s. I wonder what it was that originally got Nintendo into that attitude?
Remember that your first Goomba boldly you walk? When Mario touched that mushroom being brought up more largely remember that you are surprised? Miscalculate your jump that pit remember that it falls?

Kojinka

  • Bruised
« Reply #2 on: June 14, 2008, 10:06:50 AM »
It won't show me the entire article.  it cuts out on the Punchout example, where it says "For the NES versio"
Regards, Uncle Dolan

Chupperson Weird

  • Not interested.
« Reply #3 on: June 14, 2008, 10:18:31 AM »
This is pretty bad, I have to say. The article. Max needs some schoolin'.
That was a joke.

« Reply #4 on: June 14, 2008, 10:37:20 AM »
I thought it was funny reading a guy's comment on how you come off as ignorant and immature when you don't understand the importance of censorship and a guy posted a retaliation comment that basically proved his point.

But the whole article is pretty stupid.
I'm a horrible person.

TEM

  • THE SOVIET'S MOST DANGEROUS PUZZLE.
« Reply #5 on: June 14, 2008, 11:11:39 AM »
0000

Deezer

  • Invincible
« Reply #6 on: June 14, 2008, 11:15:14 AM »
I'm pretty sure that was the exact same Castlevania screen shot they used in the latest Nintendo Power.

« Reply #7 on: June 14, 2008, 12:16:29 PM »
Oh yeah... I remember that.

AHHHHH! "Yes,Bobby?" "I had a nightmare where Dracula's disimbodied head tried to bite me!"
The next day...

"Hello? Nintendo Power." "Your stupid ******* front cover of ******* Darcula w/out his ******* body gave my **** child, Bobby, a ******* nightmare, you ********!" "[hangs up]"
« Last Edit: June 15, 2008, 12:15:24 AM by Deezer »

Glorb

  • Banned
« Reply #8 on: June 14, 2008, 12:28:38 PM »
My favorite comment:

Wow. Why even do this? Putting this together was totally a waste of your time and an insult to status quo of the times these games were released. If you don’t understand the importance and necessity of censorship, don’t write about it because you only come across as being ignorant and immature.
every

« Reply #9 on: June 14, 2008, 12:39:34 PM »
Woah. Thats a pretty bad insult. But, I agree. Censorship is censorship. Don't insult it, or you might have the FCC on your doorstep instead of a new video game.

BP

  • Beside Pacific
« Reply #10 on: June 14, 2008, 01:48:36 PM »
The Red Cross wasn't taken out of EB for religious reasons. The Red Cross Association could've taken legal action against Nintendo if they wanted to.
All your dreeeeeeams begiiin to shatterrrrrr~
It's YOUR problem!

« Reply #11 on: June 14, 2008, 03:11:48 PM »
Besides, if a company chooses to censor it's own product...that's within their rights to do so. Telling them not to do what they want could theoretically be construed as censorship too, right? Nintendo wanted to be family friendly, I really don't understand why that bothers people.

 I mean, when I was a kid I wanted lots of blood and gore and other nonsense and hated it getting removed. Then I grew up and realized it's not even important. Maybe it's seeing how my generation is turning out...

ShadowBrain

  • Ridiculously relevant
« Reply #12 on: June 14, 2008, 07:23:18 PM »
The Red Cross wasn't taken out of EB for religious reasons. The Red Cross Association could've taken legal action against Nintendo if they wanted to.
In that case, the Roman Catholic Church is in for a lawsuit.

I don't see what's wrong with the article, honestly. I mean, yeah, they did some of these things for good reasons, but I didn't really see the guy as bashing anything.
"Mario is your oyster." ~The Chef

« Reply #13 on: June 15, 2008, 02:13:54 AM »
My favorite (as in they're so ridiculous to be funny) censorship moments in the first article were the irony bits, such as completely missing the line for Chunky in the Donkey Kong 64 rap (what, was the rap so terrible that not even Nintendo could watch it all the way through? Rare should have never included that rap in the first place), and reminding people of Monster Party for NES. I look back on it and wonder why on earth Monster Party never gave me nightmares. You remember halfway through the first level where all the happy stuff turns to evil bleeding things.

I was surprised to see Secret of Mana on there... and I agree, "Heck Hound" is ridiculous, but on second thought, that just adds to the charm, more interesting than the other name for it. Even though I like the name Howler better.

Actually, what am I saying, I've seen Secret of Mana on one of these articles before... the infamous secret page that one of those magic floating book enemies occasionally flips to.
You didn't say wot wot.

Glorb

  • Banned
« Reply #14 on: June 15, 2008, 07:34:48 AM »
Besides, if a company chooses to censor it's own product...that's within their rights to do so. Telling them not to do what they want could theoretically be construed as censorship too, right? Nintendo wanted to be family friendly, I really don't understand why that bothers people.

Um, you're kind of missing the point. It was someone else's product they were censoring, not their own. Theoretically the developer could just not release it on NES, but because of Nintendo's monopoly on the market they pretty much had to if they wanted sales.

Personally, I'm anti-censorship. If Nintendo wanted to release games on their system, they should've put content descriptors on the box instead of candy-coating everything so little kids' parents wouldn't be offended.
every

Kojinka

  • Bruised
« Reply #15 on: June 15, 2008, 09:18:18 AM »

I really don't see anything "offensive" about Bowser's pose in the left image.
Regards, Uncle Dolan

The Chef

  • Super
« Reply #16 on: June 15, 2008, 09:29:16 AM »
That's considered an offensive hand gesture in Italian.

ShadowBrain

  • Ridiculously relevant
« Reply #17 on: June 15, 2008, 03:48:51 PM »
Well, then they could've just changed it in Italy (I've never seen a picture of it... I thought it supposedly looked like he was giving the fingers or doing that "up yours" gesture or something).

Also, is it just the computer I'm using right now, or are those pictures in blurry sepia?
"Mario is your oyster." ~The Chef

TEM

  • THE SOVIET'S MOST DANGEROUS PUZZLE.
« Reply #18 on: June 15, 2008, 04:52:05 PM »
Bowser's gesture is extremely offensive, it's the same as getting flipped off.
0000

Captain Jim

  • TwinklyMuffin
« Reply #19 on: June 15, 2008, 04:53:46 PM »
Some refer to it as the "Up yours" gesture.
No! I don't want that!

Kojinka

  • Bruised
« Reply #20 on: June 15, 2008, 05:08:33 PM »
Maybe it's just the small size of the image, but I just don't see how it's interpreted as "Up yours". 
Regards, Uncle Dolan

Chupperson Weird

  • Not interested.
« Reply #21 on: June 15, 2008, 05:46:18 PM »
Well then you don't know anything about it and being in motion helps you understand it a little. It is. So know and be silent.
That was a joke.

The Chef

  • Super
« Reply #22 on: June 15, 2008, 06:00:28 PM »
Maybe it's just the small size of the image, but I just don't see how it's interpreted as "Up yours". 

It's more or less the same thing as giving someone the middle finger.

« Reply #23 on: June 15, 2008, 06:15:46 PM »
So he pulls his arms farther apart now?
CURSE YOU... SOMEBODY!

« Reply #24 on: June 15, 2008, 07:03:17 PM »
That's proof Bowser hates Mario.
ROM hacking with a slice of life.

« Reply #25 on: June 15, 2008, 09:28:13 PM »
Well, then they could've just changed it in Italy

They changed it in other places because there's more likely to be an Italian person in America, or a European country other than Italy, than in Japan.
Gently push a piece of the tube containing the intersection along the fourth dimension, out of the original three dimensional space.
- WIkipedia page on the Klein bottle

Turtlekid1

  • Tortuga
« Reply #26 on: June 16, 2008, 07:14:06 AM »
Some of what was censored simply had to be censored, but others were just ridiculous.
"It'll say life is sacred and so is death
but death is life and so we move on"

Glorb

  • Banned
« Reply #27 on: June 16, 2008, 11:25:49 AM »
I have to disagree. Nothing has to be censored. People who would be offended by something shouldn't view whatever offends them. Parents shouldn't let their kids see gaphic violence, swearing, and what have you. All this talk of "censorship is neccesary" is, to put it politely, misinformed. To me, censorship means either laziness (I don't want my kids to see this porn, but it's too much trouble hiding it, so I'll just get a version that covers up the naughty bits) or, worse, propaganda (withholding of information from the people by a government and all that). But responsibility regarding children's entertainment lies with parents, not with whoever makes the entertainment.
every

Chupperson Weird

  • Not interested.
« Reply #28 on: June 16, 2008, 02:04:01 PM »
I think the SMRPG issue undermines everything Glorb just said.
That was a joke.

Glorb

  • Banned
« Reply #29 on: June 16, 2008, 10:35:06 PM »
I mostly take issue with the attitude around here that censorship is a neccessity of life that we should all live with. I mean, take SMRPG's hand gesture; it's not out of character for Bowser, and is of no consequence to the story. So Bowser's celebrating victory in a rather crude way; so do a lot of football players. Deal with it. Nintendo put it in, so it's obvious it was meant to be seen. On the other hand, it's a very minor change so I shouldn't get too up in arms about it. Still, I think it's dangerous to view censorship in such a positive way.
every

« Reply #30 on: June 16, 2008, 10:45:25 PM »
Nintendo didn't purposefully put in Bowser flipping off Italians, it was an accident. Nintendo didn't want to offend anyone, so they changed it.
Gently push a piece of the tube containing the intersection along the fourth dimension, out of the original three dimensional space.
- WIkipedia page on the Klein bottle

Glorb

  • Banned
« Reply #31 on: June 16, 2008, 11:42:04 PM »
There's no way you can accidentally have Bowser extend his arm upward and put his hand on his lower arm and not know what it means.
every

« Reply #32 on: June 17, 2008, 07:34:29 AM »
It's amazing how far Nintendo has come >.> BUT-In Galaxy they changed Hell's Prominence to Melty Molten Galaxy =O Wouldn't want to say the h-h-h w-word now would we?

ShadowBrain

  • Ridiculously relevant
« Reply #33 on: June 17, 2008, 08:29:02 AM »
This is only somewhat related to censorship, and I know everyone is tired of my "Nintendo rants", but the NES was really successful with what would now be called "casuals" and "hardcores"--and it was released with a toy gun and labeled an "ACTION SET". Now, everything's gotta be stocked with Miis, Apple-white, sanitized, and instruction-filled.

BUT-In Galaxy they changed Hell's Prominence to Melty Molten Galaxy =O Wouldn't want to say the h-h-h w-word now would we?

Whoah, that's what it was supposed to be called! Sweet!
"Mario is your oyster." ~The Chef

Turtlekid1

  • Tortuga
« Reply #34 on: June 17, 2008, 09:52:11 AM »
I have to disagree. Nothing has to be censored.

If it's not censored, then perhaps it should never be in the game in question in the first place.
"It'll say life is sacred and so is death
but death is life and so we move on"

« Reply #35 on: June 17, 2008, 10:48:01 AM »
There's no way you can accidentally have Bowser extend his arm upward and put his hand on his lower arm and not know what it means.

Hey I didn't even know that. They could have been like "ooh let's make bowser do something weird with his arms"
Gently push a piece of the tube containing the intersection along the fourth dimension, out of the original three dimensional space.
- WIkipedia page on the Klein bottle

Chupperson Weird

  • Not interested.
« Reply #36 on: June 17, 2008, 04:03:21 PM »
How are you guys so dumb that you refuse to believe things?
That was a joke.

Kuromatsu

  • 黒松
« Reply #37 on: June 17, 2008, 04:35:15 PM »
Isn't that the same gesture from "Spaceballs the Movie" that President Scroob(?) Makes?

Captain Jim

  • TwinklyMuffin
« Reply #38 on: June 17, 2008, 04:36:36 PM »
Yes. And the joke is that their salute is the "Up Yours" motion.
No! I don't want that!

ShadowBrain

  • Ridiculously relevant
« Reply #39 on: June 17, 2008, 10:46:48 PM »
...But with the direction of the hand reversed.
"Mario is your oyster." ~The Chef

« Reply #40 on: June 17, 2008, 11:08:45 PM »
Call me dense, but Bowser doing that is the first time I've seen that gesture. Seems to be called the bent elbow. I'd probably get an idea of what it meant just by seeing the arm thrust upward, but yeah, it means nothing to me.
You didn't say wot wot.

Kojinka

  • Bruised
« Reply #41 on: June 17, 2008, 11:37:32 PM »
Finally!  It took me long enough to see Bowser doing the gesture.  At first, I thought Bowser's fists were just closer together.  It wasn't until the Spaceball salute was mentioned that I finally got an idea of what I was supposed to be looking at in the SMRPG image.
Regards, Uncle Dolan

Turtlekid1

  • Tortuga
« Reply #42 on: June 18, 2008, 07:36:39 AM »
I still don't know what I'm looking at and I'm not sure I want to.
"It'll say life is sacred and so is death
but death is life and so we move on"

« Reply #43 on: June 18, 2008, 07:41:22 AM »
This site is about all the edits in WarioWare: Twisted!, it's very interesting in my opinion.
http://asho.wariocompany.com/uncensored/

« Reply #44 on: July 01, 2008, 03:30:23 AM »
The GH:Aerosmith vid on the Nintendo Channel had the word "condom" bleeped out. First time I've ever seen that done. And who says Nintendo's shed its censor-love? ;)

ShadowBrain

  • Ridiculously relevant
« Reply #45 on: July 01, 2008, 08:08:52 AM »
...And yet there was still a video of animal headshots in Cabela's Big Game Hunter (what required him to say "condom", anyway? Was he referencing the Wii Remote Jacket?).

You know, I realized something a while ago. Bullet Bills, had they never existed, would probably not be made now. A giant living bullet? With Nintendo's image and all the videogame violence debates?
"Mario is your oyster." ~The Chef

Glorb

  • Banned
« Reply #46 on: July 01, 2008, 05:43:01 PM »
(what required him to say "condom", anyway? Was he referencing the Wii Remote Jacket?).

It's just an all-around great word.
every

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