Post by: Sapphira on April 14, 2003, 07:40:00 PM
2 Kingdoms… 1 War… 1 Child… 1 Destiny…
It seemed like a perfect evening in the Mushroom Kingdom. However, Bowser kidnapped the Princess, once again. But this time it was different—much different. Something happened—something terrible—which changed everyone’s lives—especially Peach’s—forever, seemingly overnight. As the Mushroom World is turned upside-down, and the famous heroes struggle to survive, a new hero arises after many long, hard years pass. Struggling through her hardships, eventually she discovers the truth of her identity. The hope of the future lies within her hands as she seeks to fulfill her destiny, with the help of several familiar faces.
"Melony flipped the diary’s page. An old photograph fell out. Delicately she picked it up, her hands a little shaky. She looked at it carefully. It was of her mother—and another man. They were smiling lovingly, their eyes sparkling with joy and passion. Who was this other man? She carefully she turned the photograph over. A date was written on the back. It was almost 17 years ago! …Then she saw it… Her mother’s name and… Mario. …Who was this Mario…? Were they in love with each other…? If her mother loved this man… then why was her father someone else…?"
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Black Mage on April 14, 2003, 09:08:00 PM
It seems different from a lot of stories, as in that it's actually original. And while I haven't been exposed to a lot of your writing, from what I have read, it is apparent that you are good at writing.
Hence, I encourage you to post your story, and even continue it, if it's incomplete. It looks interesting, expecially your new character, Melony, as you described her earlier.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 15, 2003, 12:02:00 AM
Nevertheless, I'd like to know the rest of the story.
You can be silent and let the world think you are a fool, or you can open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Edited by - Chupperson Weird on 4/14/2003 11:03:55 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 15, 2003, 08:46:00 AM
Shoot. I can't post it right now, since I have to access the file on the old comp, and I'd have to turn it on. Actually, I'm not supposed to be on the comp right now--my parents password protected my account to keep me out. However, I deciphered the password, so I can sneek in. (I'm so bad.) :) I'll post it later today, when my dad leaves.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Sapphira on April 15, 2003, 01:04:00 PM
Oh, another thing, how do I get italics to work on the board? I kinda need it for the story. I could always compromise, but I'd prefer to use it.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Black Mage on April 15, 2003, 05:12:00 PM
While I'm not one of those slick members who found ways to practice their HTML skills on this board, I think that you may, instead of flat out posting the story on the boards, want to upload it to a web-space provider. That way, you'd be saving yourself a headache. Of course, if you're deadset on posting it like that, then someone else will have to assist you.
However, I stand by my earlier comments, I think you should post it. I'm sure it won't disappoint anyone who reads it.
Post by: Sapphira on April 15, 2003, 08:54:00 PM
-Part 1-
Chapter 1: Shattered Dreams
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“*And a child of Good and Evil shall come to rise. Good will perish and Evil will reign, but the child will destroy the Evil, and Good will prevail once more.*”
“What does that mean?” Mario asked.
“I don’t know. It came to me in a dream the other night,” Merlon replied.
Mario thought for a moment, “It sounds like some sort of prophecy.”
“Only time will tell.”
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Luigi came inside, shuffling through the mail. “Hey, Mario! You have a letter.”
“Cool! Who’s it from?”
“Open it!”
Mario carefully opened the envelope, and silently read the elegant words scripted on the beautiful stationery.
Dear Mario,
Please come to the castle as soon as you can. I have a surprise for you.
Yours truly,
Peach
As his mind processed the words, he exclaimed, “Wow! A letter from the Princess! She wants me to come over! …I gotta go! See ya, Bro.!” Mario rushed out of the house as Luigi rolled his eyes and sighed.
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“Your Highness! I have just received a disturbing vision!” A blue-cloaked figure approached as a familiar grotesque monarch glanced up from his thoughts.
“Yes, what is it?” It was Bowser.
“A voice told me this—” Kamek, the figure, told him the exact same words Merlon had told Mario earlier, “—It came to me in a dream!”
“What could it mean…?” Bowser thought about it for a second. “…It sure doesn’t sound good…!”
“What should we do?”
“We must think of something…”
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Mario soon arrived at Peach’s Castle. The guards immediately noticed the figure approaching, and smiles formed across their faces as they realized who it was. They eagerly welcomed him in as he stepped into the comforting castle. It was just as he had remembered it—the sky-blue walls with puffy white clouds painted on them…the crimson velvet rug leading up to the top of the stairs…the elegant doors with the insignia of a star on them—he had been there many times before.
“Oh, hi, Mario!” Toad, one of the Royal Mushroom Retainers and close friend to Princess Peach and Mario, headed toward him. “The Princess is upstairs, in her private chambers right now. Go ahead, she’s waiting for you.”
“Thanks, Toad!”
He headed up the stairs and opened the door. The lovely princess stood gazing out the window, then slowly she turned as she heard the door creak open.
“Hi, Mario! I’m so glad you made it.” Her voice was just as beautiful as she. “I made something for you.” She walked over to a nearby table and showed him a scrumptious delectable. “Here, it’s a strawberry cake.”
“Wow, thank you, Peach. It looks delicious!” He glanced back up at her. “What’s the special occasion?”
“Nothing, I just felt like making it for you.” She smiled and cut the cake, placing a slice each on two plates, one for each of them. He waited as she sat down on the velvety sofa, then sat down himself on a matching easy chair.
“Mmm…this is so delicious!” He seemed slightly nervous. “Hey Peach, why don’t you meet me at Shooting Star Summit this evening? It’s very beautiful…”
“I’d love to! How’s 8:00 sound?” she queried, her eyes sparkling.
“Perfect! But I must go now. Thank you for the cake. See you tonight?”
“I’ll see you,” she leaned over and kissed his cheek, his face starting to blush. “Bye!”
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Inside a dark dungeon-like place, three dark figures stood moping. They were obviously being punished for something.
“I hate this place. Why does Bowser always lock us up?” It was the voice of Wendy O. Koopa.
“’Cuz he says we’re a bunch of no-good, lousy failures,” replied her brother Larry.
Morton chimed in, “He’s the one stupid enough to think we can beat Mario.”
“Hey! Shut up!” Wendy shouted, “You may have given in to that plumber, but I haven’t!”
“He beat you up, too!” Morton sneered. Wendy turned to a defensive position and the two continued to argue. Larry was sick of their constant bickering.
“Guys! Shut up! Maybe if you can keep from arguing for two seconds, Bowser’d let us out sooner!” Wendy and Morton stopped and each gave him an evil scowl.
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It was 8:00. The sky was a beautiful deep navy, with gorgeous celestial wonders colorfully streaking across the night. The princess and the plumber reached the top of the hill on Shooting Star Summit and sat down on a blanket spread over the cool grass.
Mario smiled. “Thank you for coming, Princess.”
“Wow… It’s so beautiful…and romantic…” She focused on the wondrous sky above.
“Peach…there’s something I’d like to ask you,” Mario spoke softly, slightly shy.
Her attention turned to the red-clad hero. “What is it?”
“We’ve known each other for a long time… I can’t even remember how long now…”
“I know…” she smiled, “It seems like I’ve known you for as long as the stars have shown in the night sky…”
“We’ve gotten to be very…close,” Mario continued, “I’m not sure how to say this, but…I’ve loved you since the day we first met…”
“…Oh, Mario…” Her blue eyes twinkled. Mario gathered his courage, his eyes transfixed on hers.
“Peach…will you…marry me?” He opened up a small box and showed her a beautiful ring.
Peach shrieked with delight. “Oh, Mario! I’ve always loved you, too! Of course I will!” She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him frantically. “I’ve been waiting my whole life for you to ask me… This is a dream come true!”
Mario smiled at her and glanced back up at the night sky. “Peach! Look! Look at all those shooting stars!” A gorgeous meteor shower took place, sending thousands of twinkling stars plummeting down past the horizon.
Peach leaned softly against him. “It’s so lovely…” Her thoughts drifted off as they gazed at the stars long into the night.
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“Your Highness!” Kamek entered the throne room. “I have had yet another disturbing vision.”
Bowser looked slightly annoyed. “Now what?”
“It was the Princess!” Kamek stammered, “…And…Mario…!”
“What?!” He turned to an alert position, “What about them?! Go on!”
“Your Highness…they were…uh…” he was having trouble forming the words, “…Mario asked the Princess to marry him! They’re engaged!”
“What?!” Bowser stared at Kamek in disbelief, “No!! This cannot be! I made her promise… Urgghh!!” His scaly face turned red with fury.
“What should we do, Sir?” Kamek asked timidly.
“Urghhh!!” Bowser opened his fierce mouth as a bright orange stream of fire emerged from it, lighting the dark room. He was so enraged, Kamek was afraid he was going to explode.
“Sir, you must control yourself! Please!”
“Never have I been so furious!” he growled. His voice suddenly changed into a cool and confident tone, as he brushed back his coarse hair with his scaly claw. “Kamek! Come. I have a plan!”
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Mario and Peach continued to lie on the cool grass, still gazing at the celestial wonders. They were both silent, lost in their own thoughts.
“Oh my gosh!” Peach suddenly sat up, rising out from his arms, “Look how late it is! It’s after midnight!”
Mario looked at her eyes and quickly glanced back up at the sky, “We should probably go, huh.”
The two quietly gathered up their things and headed back toward the castle, which was close by. They walked side by side, the faint rustle of their feet on the soft ground making the only sound.
“Peach,” Mario broke the silence, “Today I visited Merlon, and he told me of a strange dream he had.” The princess’s eyes met his. “He said a voice came to him and told him this… ‘And a child of Good and Evil shall come to rise—” he continued the rest of the visualization.
“Wow, that’s strange,” Peach said, absorbing it in her mind, “I wonder what it could mean?”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out. Merlon said he had no idea…but…it sounds like a prophecy.”
“Hmm…” the Princess wondered. Her mind drifted back to the events of earlier that evening. Soon they realized they were already back at the castle.
“Well, it looks like we’re here…” Peach sighed. “Thank you so much for the most wonderful evening. Goodnight, Mario.” She leaned over to kiss his nose, but Mario turned his face and slowly met her tender lips with his. For the first time, they both kissed with pure, genuine love.
Peach looked up and smiled gently. “I love you,” she whispered, as she closed the castle door softly behind her. Mario smiled, then quickly he started to head back to his home.
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In her room, Peach got ready for bed and put on her nightgown. She lay down on her soft, cozy bed and stared at the ceiling, thinking of the wonderful evening she had had. Not able to sleep, she walked outside to her balcony and looked at the starry night sky. She fingered her new ring and slowly the realization absorbed into her mind. *I’m going to be married.*
She smiled and sighed. “Oh, Mario…”
She sat down in the balcony chair, her mind wandering as she gazed at the sky. Then she remembered the prophecy Mario had told her.
“*And a child of Good and Evil shall come to rise…*” The words played over and over in her head. *What does it mean?* she wondered, but soon her mind drifted into the world of dreams, as she lay asleep in her chair, overlooking the Mushroom Kingdom.
A breeze drifted over the dreaming princess. There was a faint whirring sound. She heard it—it was the sound of propellers in the wind. Still half asleep, she was unaware of what was happening. Suddenly a scaly claw came up from behind and clutched over her mouth. Instantly startled from her sleep, she tried to scream, but nothing came out.
“Ha ha! I have you now, Princess!” the figure laughed.
It was Roy Koopa.
The gruesome turtle-like creature tied her up and pushed her into the Clown Copter. Her muffled screams were faintly discerned as they rode off to the massive castle of Bowser.
The Copter landed and the princess was led out. Standing before the tied-up girl was the atrocious form of Bowser, surrounded by several guards. Some of them held her still.
Bowser spoke gently. “Well hello there, Princess. How are you doing this evening?” She glared at him fiercely from behind her gagged mouth. “Oh, I’m sorry,” Bowser realized, “Guards! Untie Her Majesty at once.” They then freed her immediately without hesitation. “Tsk, tsk…What were you thinking? How rude of you! She’s our…guest.”
The princess frowned in utter disgust. “Bowser! Why am I here?!”
“We had an agreement,” he calmly replied, “It looks like you broke our little promise…”
“What are you talking about?!”
“Don’t be so naïve, sweetness…”
“Sweetness!?” Peach interrupted angrily, “Why are you talking this way? What do you want from me!? Why do you always kidnap me?”
His eyes narrowed and met her gaze. “Guards! You’re excused!” Silently everyone left.
The princess was left cold and alone with the monster.
“You really wanna know? All right, fine,” he stared at her, “All this time I’ve kept it a secret from everyone… I made them think I kidnapped you just to make your kingdom vulnerable…”
“What are you saying?” she gasped.
“You wanna know the truth? Follow me.”
Bowser exited the room as the frightened princess reluctantly followed. She was led down the dark corridor when Bowser stopped abruptly and opened a door.
The princess froze. The room looked exactly the same as her palace bedroom.
“What’s going on here?” she gasped, “What’s my room doing here?”
Bowser spoke gently, “I duplicated your room for you so you’d feel more…at home…”
“Why?” Her voice was barely a whisper.
“You’re gonna be here a long time…” he replied, “The truth is…I love you, Peach.”
“What?!?!” she gasped, unbelieving what she had just heard, “You’re serious?!!”
“You broke my heart, Peach,” he spoke glumly, “As long as you remained single, I had a chance… But instead, you decide to marry my sworn nemesis!”
“What?!” Peach was taken aback, “I love Mario! And I hate you! You never had a chance with me! And you never will! Why can’t you just leave me alone?!!”
“Please! Don’t torture my soul any longer!” he cried, “Have pity on me!”
“Pity?! On *you*?! You have pity on *me*! You’ve tortured not only me, but Mario and everyone in the entire Mushroom Kingdom!” She looked at him irritably. “Just leave me alone!”
“I’ve tried to hold back… Please, stop resisting me! I don’t want to hurt you!”
“Well it’s too late for that,” she retorted, “Go back to the fiery pit, where you belong.”
“Oh…Princess…have mercy on my agonizing soul,” he cried, “Let go of your hatred! Please…I can no longer hold myself back…”
Unable to control himself any longer, Bowser edged himself toward the princess. Terrified, she cowered back in utter fear.
“What are you doing…?!” she shrieked. He came closer. “Help! Heeelllp me, someone! Please!”
Amidst her screams, the scandalous monster slashed her nightgown, ripping it to long, dangling shreds. He then grabbed her and forced her down.
She was raped.
Peach struggled and screamed with all her might. “Help meeeee!!”
Bowser got up and exited the room, leaving the terrified girl whimpering to herself. She sat on her bed, her beautiful pink silk nightgown now in pieces, placed her head in her hands, and wept bitterly all throughout the night.
Post by: Black Mage on April 15, 2003, 09:24:00 PM
Anyway, you sure weren't kidding, it is quite the serious story. However, I think that's why I like it. I was right about one thing, though, you are talented at writing. It's not often you find well organized stories around here. I really hope some people heed your warnings though, as I think some of these kids here shouldn't be reading some of this, that I do. But, It's good. I hope you continue to keep posting it, as the way I see it, the "worst", as in events in the story, is over. At least, what I can imagine. :-)
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 16, 2003, 12:38:00 AM
Anyway, it is quite well written, albiet much more ..."detailed," shall we say, than the Mario universe usually allows for...
One criticism, however. It's obvious that Bowser doesn't truly love Peach, or else the last bit wouldn't have happened. In games like Paper Mario, it seems like Bowser does indeed love the Princess. Oh well. Continue, please.
You can be silent and let the world think you are a fool, or you can open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Edited by - Chupperson Weird on 4/15/2003 11:43:03 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 16, 2003, 11:04:00 AM
CW, critism noted. However, I'll explain later about it.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Sapphira on April 16, 2003, 02:39:00 PM
Chapter 2: Dismay
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It was morning, the sun already having been peeking out for a while. Mario had just awoken, still lying in bed. Luigi, being an early riser, was already up, fixing breakfast. He heard a knock on the door.
“Oh pretty please, let me get it!” Luigi muttered sarcastically. He opened the door and immediately recognized the figure.
“Toad!”
“Hurry!” he panted, obviously out of breath, “Get Mario! The Princess is missing!
Mario yawned, just getting up. “What?!” he exclaimed upon hearing these words.
“How did this happen?!” Luigi asked apprehensively.
“Hurry, you guys must follow me to the castle!” Toad cried.
They immediately went to Peach’s Castle, where all the people were in an uproar. Everyone was searching the palace—for the princess, for clues, for anything. Luigi spotted Princess Daisy standing in the hallway, distraught.
“Daisy!” He came up to her. “Daisy, are you all right?”
“Look at me…” she sniffled, “I’m crying! I never cry, never ever… What’s wrong with me…?”
“Daisy…”
She shook her head. “Oh, Luigi…” she cried, “How could such an awful thing happen…? Poor, poor Peach… She’s already gone through so much…” Daisy placed a tissue to her tear-filled eyes.
“I know, I know,” he attempted to comfort her, “Don’t worry, we’ll get her back…”
Daisy looked at him, her eyes full of hope. Then she burst into tears, crying hysterically. Luigi put his arms around her, stroking her soft auburn hair as she wept on his shoulder.
Meanwhile, Mario headed off toward Peach’s room and hesitantly opened the door with a creak. He looked around, when he spotted a white envelope with his name written elegantly on it, lying on Peach’s dresser. Slowly he clutched the letter and closed his eyes.
“Oh, Peach…” he whispered, “Don’t worry, I’ll rescue you. Everything will go back…just the way it was before this mess… I swear, if Bowser’s…” Anger boiled up inside him. “He’ll pay, by the Stars he will…!”
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Whimpering, the Princess slowly got up, and wrapped the bed sheets around her. Walking over to the balcony, she sat down in a chair. She looked out at the daytime sky, the view much different than from her castle, and wept.
“Oh…why did this have to happen to me…?” she lamented, “I wish someone could help me…” She glanced up desperately. “…Oh please…”
A light flickered in the sky. She had seen it. *Could it really be?* she wondered. The light came closer. *Yes! It is!!* Peach recognized it immediately as it flew to her.
“I came as fast as I could…” the little Star Kid panted.
“Twink! What are you doing here?!” she gasped.
“I heard your wish, so I came to help you,” Twink replied energetically, “I’ll do what ever I can.”
“Oh, thank the Stars!” she exclaimed, her heart full of joy, “I missed you so much.” Twink then realized where the princess was at.
“Princess, why are you here?” he asked slowly, “Did Bowser kidnap you again?”
“I’m afraid so…” she quavered, “He never stops. I’ve lost track of how many times now…”
Suddenly there was a pounding on the door.
“Oh no!” she gasped, “Hurry! You must go!”
Reluctantly, Twink looked back at her then flew off out the window. The banging continued.
“What is it?!” Peach shouted after the coast was clear.
The door opened as Wendy O. Koopa entered the room.
“Here’s your clothes, Toadstool.” She plopped one of Peach’s traditional dresses carelessly on a chair. “I see Bowser’s made sure you’re at home,” she commented. Wendy glanced at her torn outfit. “Nice nightgown. I’m guessing the handiwork of him, too?” she smirked.
Peach, ignoring this comment, picked up the dress.
“…Thank you,” she replied, trying to sound pleasant, “…You don’t sound like you like your father.”
Wendy turned away and shrugged. “Puuhh…” Inaudibly she mumbled something under her breath. “Who would?”
Wendy left and closed the door. Peach changed into her dress and sighed heavily. *Mario…please find me…*
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The Koopa king stood in front of his massive army. Troops chattered until the booming voice of Bowser echoed throughout their ears.
“All right, Troops, it is now time. For years, we have been dominated by the Mushroom Kingdom. It is now time to end this.
“Each of my commanders will lead you to a city or village in the Mushroom Kingdom. You will construct a full-scale assault—capture all inhabitants, and kill those who resist.
“Your commanders have the plans they are to follow. Force the cities into an alliance with the Koopa Kingdom. If they do not comply, then you will destroy everything—nothing is to be left, is that clear?! Now go!”
The immense militia marched away, setting off to its destination.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Sapphira on April 17, 2003, 08:11:00 AM
Chapter 3: Unexpected
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Three weeks had passed. Already, Bowser’s Troops had completely taken over the once beautiful Mushroom Kingdom. Cities were burned to the ground. Lifeless bodies lay strewn about everywhere, covering the blood-stained land. Those who were not slaughtered were captured and forced into slavery.
No town was spared; the loyal inhabitants refused to join Bowser’s vile fleet, and they paid terrible consequences for it. Few people were scattered and left hiding, fearing for their precious lives. Many were missing, presumed dead. Among those were Mario, Luigi, Daisy, and Toad.
Others living in towns outside the Kingdom fled to more isolated places in the Mushroom World. Bowser had already conquered some other lands, such as Moleville and Seaside Town, which surrendered immediately without a fight.
The Princess was still held captive, however, she was treated as a “guest”—if it could even be called that. For the first time since the unfortunate first night, the cretin Bowser entered her room.
“Ah, my love, how are you this afternoon?” he asked casually. The princess was furious about his presence.
“What are you doing here?!” she demanded, “You stay the heck away from me!”
“Relax, Princess, I’m not going to hurt you,” he moved his gruesome claw towards her shoulder. She shoved it away and faced him defensively.
“Yeah, right!” she shouted, “You said……” Suddenly, her face flushed very white. Immediately, she rushed to the bathroom and vomited.
“Are you all right?” Bowser asked, but she continued. “Kamek!” he shouted, “Come here at once!” Before the words could escape his mouth, the head Magikoopa entered the room.
“Yes, Sir?” he asked.
“The princess is ill; take her to our Medical Area.”
“Yes, Sir.” Kamek ran over to the frail princess.
“Get away from me!” she screamed. He pointed his wand at her, and she began to glow. “Help!” she shrieked. In the blink of an eye, Peach disappeared. She had been teleported to the Medical Area.
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A few hours had passed, and Peach warily opened her eyes. She found herself lying in her bed, back in her room. Suddenly she felt ill again and rushed to the bathroom. After she finished vomiting, she glanced at herself in the mirror. She looked terrible and she noticed that it looked like she had gained a few pounds.
*Oh great*, she sighed, *I barf my head off and gain weight. This is fun…*
She lay back down, still not feeling that great. There was a rap on her door. Kamek slowly entered and tiptoed over to Peach, trying not to wake her deliberately. But he noticed she already was.
“Good, you’re awake,” he said.
“Uhhghh…!” Peach threw the blankets back and stared at the Magikoopa indignantly. “What?! I have a headache…” She put a hand over her face.
“We finished testing you…to see why you were ill, and we found something…interesting…” He glanced at her cautiously.
“What?” she moaned.
“I don’t know how else to tell you this…but the tests showed that there’s another life form inside of you.” She stared at him blankly. “You’re pregnant.”
“What?!!” she screamed in disbelief, “What do you mean?! How is that possible?! Oh my gosh…no…!” She closed her eyes and shook her head in dismay.
“This is an amazing situation,” Kamek continued apathetically, “You see, this is the first human-Koopa crossover. It’s never happened before.” The princess ignored him.
“Does Bowser know of this?” she queried.
“Actually, I was just going to tell him.”
“You are not to tell him,” she stated coldly.
“Sorry, but I only take orders from His Highness…” Kamek bluntly replied. The princess fiercely picked up the unsuspecting Koopa by his collar, lifting him off the ground.
“Listen,” she yelled softly, “You better not say a word about this, so help me, or I will break your bony little behind so fast…” She peered fiercely into his thick lenses.
“Y…y…yes, Princess…” he stammered.
“That’s better.” She calmly put him back down, and he dashed off out of her room.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Black Mage on April 17, 2003, 10:43:00 AM
However, I do like your story so far, it's very interesting. Everything seems to be taking a darker light, but, that's what makes it interesting. Nice work, and hope you keep going. :-)
Post by: Sapphira on April 17, 2003, 11:58:00 AM
BTW, just wait. The story will get darker. Muu hu ha ha ha ha!!! (Why do I keep laughing like that?!)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 18, 2003, 12:05:00 AM
Just joking. Anyway, yes, I'm reading, and it's quite good, although quite dark. But it's compelling as well.
Post by: Sapphira on April 18, 2003, 12:28:00 AM
Actually, I'm glad people are liking it. Yes it's...different...
CH 4's still scheduled for tomorrow.
GAH!! I'm gonna have to edit/revise the rest of my story! I'm getting re-hooked on finishing it up (from the completed original manuscript, anyway.) Part 3 needs some MAJOR work, though...
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/18/2003 7:45:24 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 18, 2003, 10:56:00 AM
Chapter 4: Heartfelt Wish
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Two months had passed. Slowly Bowser had captured more lands, but luckily most of the Mushroom World was still in tact. Dinosaur Land was still holding strong, since it was isolated and Bowser was more concerned with the mainland. Yoshi heard about the massacre, and he immediately departed to search for his missing friends. Meanwhile, other Yoshis helped harbor escapees of the conquered lands.
Unlike Dinosaur Land, other places were not so lucky. One of the cities, Rose Town, had put up a good fight, but they soon became defenseless against the inexorable army. They were forced to surrender; all the residents were now slaves of the vile Koopa Empire.
Princess Peach was still held at Bowser’s Castle as she waited for Mario, her knight in shining armor, to come. But he was missing. The princess was now three months along and slightly starting to show. Isolating herself in her room, she spent her time lamenting over the fate of the Mushroom Kingdom and her lost fiancé. It was late in the morning and Peach had just woken up and sat up in bed. There was a knock on the door, and the formidable image of Bowser entered the room.
“Good morning, Princess,” he said pleasantly, “How’s the little one?”
“What?! How do you know about that?!” she demanded.
He looked at her nonchalantly. “Come now, Peach, don’t get so worked up. It’s clearly unmistakable; anyone could tell.”
“Kamek told you, didn’t he?” she presumed.
“He had no choice. I threatened to torture him.”
“Why are you here?” She looked at him coldly. “I thought I told you not to bother me.” She turned away and crossed her arms.
“I wanted to see a smile from you,” Bowser conveyed, “It makes your face so much more delightful. Come on, just a little one?” He placed his scaly claw on her arm. The princess spun around, fuming.
“Well tough luck, jerk!” she screamed, “You destroy my kingdom, kill my friends, separate me from my fiancé, and rape and impregnate me! Is that something to smile about?! Not to mention, this is only the *millionth* time you’ve kidnapped me! I’ll smile when everything’s normal, happy and peaceful once again, and the day you perish!” Her eyes clouded up. “I’m sick of you ruining my life! If you claim you love me so much, why do you torture me?! Uhhghh! Just go away…!” She turned away distraught as tears streamed down her rosy cheeks. She plopped down on her bed.
“There, there…” Bowser comforted, “You just lie down and everything’ll be all right…” He pulled out a small device as he attempted to ease her. Peach caught a glimpse of it; it was a hypodermic injection.
“What’s that?!” she shrieked, “What are you doing?!” She shrank away in terror, but Bowser grabbed her by the ankle and pulled her back. Peach struggled to free herself, but he was too powerful.
“Don’t worry, it won’t hurt,” he reassured, “Hold still…” He pressed the device to her neck and injected her.
“Aaaahh!” she shrilled, flinching, “What’d you do to me?! Aaahh…! Help!!” A painful tingling sensation surged through her body.
“It’s designed to help you,” Bowser stated, “It’ll speed up the pregnancy…”
“What?! How…?!” her voice trailed off.
“Let’s just say, that if this works, you’re due in one month.”
Her eyes widened. “How is that possible?!” she gasped. “I don’t even want this child! It’s a monster, just like you!!” she screamed vehemently. “Get outta my sight! Now!”
“You’ll thank me one day!” he shouted, “You wouldn’t last six months, let alone the full twelve!” With that, the detestable monster stormed out of the room.
“Wait!” the princess screamed, “*Twelve* months?! It’d take a *year*?!” She shuddered at the thought as Bowser slammed the door shut. “Urghhh!! I hate you, Bowser!” Peach was both outraged and petrified, her emotions tangled in a huge disarray. She sat down on her bed, overwhelmed with everything.
A light tapping sound was heard. It was coming from the balcony window. Peach walked over—it was him!
“Twink!” she cried out. Quickly she opened the door. “You came back!”
“Oh, Princess! How are you holding up?” the young Star Kid asked compassionately. The princess looked away and gave a heavy sigh. Understanding how she felt, he changed the subject.
“…I got you a gift. Well…actually…a gift for your daughter…”
Peach looked at him curiously. “A daughter…? It’s a girl…? How do you kn—wait! How did you find out about this whole thing?” *I never told him anything… There’s no way he could have known…* She was very dumbfounded, her mind whirling a mile a minute.
Twink smacked his forehead. “Oh… I wasn’t supposed to tell you…!” He shook his head and sighed. “Oh well… The Stars know everything that goes on in the world. I mean…well…*I* don’t know everything, since I’m just a Star Kid…” he rambled, “But…I do know what happens, well…to you…” Her mind registered the concept and a thought occurred to her.
“Twink! Are you saying that you’re, like, a Star Guardian?!”
“…In a way, yes…” he hesitated, thinking of a way to explain it, “Risen Stars can choose the person they wish to protect.”
“…And you chose me?” She was beginning to understand. “Oh, thank you, Twink.”
“Remember Geno?” he asked.
“Geno?” She thought for a second. “Oh! Yes, I had almost forgotten about him!”
Twink continued, “Well, he watches over Gaz—remember him?—of Rose Town.” Peach’s thoughts shifted as she heard these words.
“Oh…are they okay?” she asked concernedly, “…I heard Rose Town was…destroyed…”
“I…I’m not sure…” he replied, uncertain, “Right now, he and his mother are among the missing…”
“Oh…I hope they’re all right…” she trailed off, “Say…do you know if Mario or my friends are okay?” Her eyes glimmered with a touch of hope.
Twink looked at her doubtfully. “…They’re also missing… I’m sorry…” He spoke reluctantly, “A lot of people have fled to Yoshi’s Island, since Dinosaur Land is safe for now…” He trailed off and realized the whole point of why he had come. “Oh yeah! Here’s your gift.”
The princess opened the mystical pouch and her eyes locked on to a gorgeous glowing star dangling from a golden chain.
“Oh…It’s beautiful!” she awed, mesmerized, “Thank you, Twink! You’re so sweet…”
“It’s a Star Pendant,” Twink explained, “When worn it helps you in need… It helps the Stars hear your wishes more loudly and clearly, so they can find you quicker.”
“Oh, thank you! You don’t know how much this means to me.” She cherished it in her heart as she spoke to the little Star. Studying his eyes, she looked at him wholeheartedly. “Twink…I have a request. My child—when she’s born—will need a Star Guardian to watch over her. Would you…?” she trailed off for Twink knew what she had implied.
“Oh, Princess, I’d be honored!” His face brightened, but soon it faded down again. “But…it’s not my decision… The Star Spirits must agree to it…” Peach glanced at the floor, mindlessly inspecting her nails, then looked back to the Star Kid.
“Would you…be able to find Mario?” She paused. “If you do, please tell him I’m all right…and so is his daughter…
“But Peach, he’s not the…”
“Please…” she pressed, “Tell him… He needs to know…” Her voice quavered as she averted her eyes away in anguish. Twink felt great pity for her.
“I…I’ll do my best,” he replied, “Goodbye, Princess…” Twink slowly flew away into the distance. He hated having to leave her, but it was the best he could do for her.
“Goodbye!” she waved sadly, “…Oh…be careful, Twink…”
The princess slowly closed the balcony window as sorrow poured over her heart. And she prayed for him, for her kingdom, her friends, for Mario.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/18/2003 7:55:12 PM
Post by: Insane Steve on April 18, 2003, 08:54:00 PM
(Sigma) k
k=1</p><p>Out of 10 so far! I mean, you almost inspired me to post a fanfic here... almost.</p><p>Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.</p>
--
A Letter to my 16 Year Old Self Sent From 10 Years In the Future
Hello! You might not recognise me. You probably do, though. I don't look much different than you. A few pounds heavier, but I mean other than that... I have come to post this message on the extreme off chance that I somehow wind up being 16 years old again, somehow.
Kid, you're not quite right in the head. You probably realise this to an extent, but it's a lot worse than you think. Don't worry, when you grow up you'll realise that writing PeachXBowser rapefic while being vehemently against even minor swears is also not normal. Not even close. And certainly not a "10/10". Oh, and being able to read and use summation notation is not as impressive of a skill as you think it is right now, so stop doing it.
It's going to be ok, though. You see, things are going to be not so great for a while, but eventually someone is going to get the excellent idea to give you various pills. Unfortunately for you, you're a freak of nature in more than one way and the vast majority of them are going to be useless. In particular, "Abilify" is incredibly nasty, the one whose name sounds like a Pokemon is going to get you almost killed when it causes you to pass out while driving one day, and the one that tastes like cat vomit will make you gain about 25 pounds and turn you into somewhat of a sexual deviant.
The very first pill you're going to get (it's shaped something like a D) is a lot more useful than you think. Don't stop taking it, because if you do 5 years later you'll get a different pill which looks a lot like one of the pills from Dr. Mario that does the same thing but costs about 20x as much instead. The other useful pills are the ones shaped like Tetris blocks and the really big ones you have to take 4 of a day because, as mentioned before, you're a freak of nature. Most of the rest are going to be useless.
You don't know it yet, but engineering is not your calling. You already know, in your heart, what is. You know those problems on probability you completely obliterate on math contests (oh, by the way, one of these is going to kick your ass two years from now, so don't be too cocky)? Turns out that is a part of a branch of mathematics that's pretty useful. Someone is going to tell you that becoming an actuary will be a great way to apply your incredible talents in this field. Don't fall for it. It'll seem like a great idea at the time but unknownst to you the economy will be worse the year you graduate college than at any point since the Depression. This field will get hit especially hard, and the fallout from this is going to cause you to almost kill yourself.
You say that you won't drink until you're 21. You have no idea how wrong you are. This will, in fact, lead to a night in jail at some point. You actually have major tendencies towards alcoholism. Be careful, as they will result in ...not the best grades in college (if you go the alcoholic route, you'll get a C+ in a college class. No, don't roll your eyes at me and look all incredulous, like you're better than that. You aren't.) You also say that you aren't going to have sex with someone you can't see yourself marrying. This is also incredibly wrong (you'd never actually believe me if I told you what happened in November of 2012 in Columbus, OH, so I'll let you discover this yourself). You will actually find your life partner (and start the chain of events that results in the Columbus thing) as the result of a link posted in a thread on this very board, but you haven't seen it yet. Actually, for all the talk about how introspective you are and how well you know yourself, you really know nothing about yourself.
On a weird tangent, that dog picture that's going to get posted in a thread about difficulties with the opposite sex is going to get obscenely popular. Like, you have no idea. Oh, right, you haven't seen it yet.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, talking about how awesome this story is makes you look a lot more deranged than you can ever realise at your age. Stop posting in this thread if you know what's good for you.
I mean, think about it, man.
Post by: Sapphira on April 18, 2003, 09:02:00 PM
Actually, I've written a comedy fanfic before (Nintendo but Non-Mario), and it was kind of funny. (I STILL need to finish the very, VERY ending.) I've found my best style is intense drama, though. :)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/18/2003 8:06:10 PM
Post by: Insane Steve on April 18, 2003, 09:28:00 PM
Ignius is a brown Yoshi and Chiria is a pink Yoshi. Their personalities.... I'll let you find out for yourself. (Yes, I prefer the exotic-sounding names.)
The two snuck onto the ship. They really didn't know who owned the ship.... or where it was going, but they snuck on anyways. They explored the main deck with caution, not knowing if anyone was coming. Suddenly, Chiria saw something.
"(Wow, this ship has a diving board!)" Chiria exclaimed. "(And it's made of wood! But.... how do you get back on? I don't see a ladder or anything...)"
Ignius merely smacked himself and muttered "(How did I get stuck with this twit?)"
Meanwhile, in the inner depths of the ship, a man in a suit that looked supiciously like Cap'n Crunch's, was playing Battleship against.... himself.
"E4!" ... Miss. His voice was rather high pitched, with an accent that is a lot like a Frenchman's mixed with a German's. He was very short, maybe 4 feet tall. From his uniform, you can tell he was an admiral... a very high ranking officer.
He jumped out of his seat, ran to the other chair, and called a number.
"H6. ... Ah, you stupid ... You sunk my Battleship! Ahhhh!"
The phone in his ship rang. He answered.
A deep-pitched voice answered: "They've just boarded the ship. Now's the time."
The Admiral replied: "Can't you tell I'm playing Battleship! I have to do this NOW?!?!? I don't want to climb the stairs now! Don't you know how short I am! Arrrrrrgh!"
Ignius and Chiria continued to explore the ship. Actually, they just stood there. They had explored everything. Suddenly, they heard footsteps. The Admiral was coming.
"(Ok, we obviously need to hide SOMEWHERE. But where?)"
Chiria found a spot. "(I know, I'll hide behind this mast!)" Her head stuck out the side of the pole..... as it wasn't very large.
"(Yes, sure, I'm SURE he won't see you there,)" Ignius replied in his usual sarcastic tone. He rolled his rather large eyes. He saw a pair of barrels on the deck of the ship.
"(There, we can hide in the barrels.)" Ignius observed. He ran to the barrels.
"(What's wrong with MY spot?)" Inquired Chiria. "(... Fine!)" She ran to the barrels.
But it was too late. the Admiral had seen her.
----------------------------------------
Wow, that was a LOT more than a snippet. I'll edit it out if it interferes too much with your story...
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Edited by - Insane Steve on 4/18/2003 8:45:31 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 18, 2003, 09:36:00 PM
...Interesting... Aren't you the one who always has Billiards somehow incorporated into your stories?
(BTW, could you please mind the swearing? It breaks the board rules and is also a *MAJOR* pet peeve of mine. 'Preciate it.)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/18/2003 8:37:52 PM
Post by: Insane Steve on April 18, 2003, 09:44:00 PM
See, I've written one and a half FanFics. The other one was flooded with real world referrences. Even in that "short" section, There are referrences to a telephone and the game Battleship.
Of course... my current story is quite complicated. There are 9-12 major good characters depending on how you look at it, and 6-10 major evil characters. You have to remember A LOT of details. It might be hard to follow.
And yes... I guess I'll not swear. Although I'd have to edit the story big time for swears if I were to actually post it here... There's a LOT of explitives that would be filtered here. And I edited out the one swear I saw. One swear in 3 paragraphs is really sparce for me, actually.
That's who I am. Interesting. I've known that for years. I mean, I rated your story in sumation notation!
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Edited by - Insane Steve on 4/18/2003 8:46:39 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 18, 2003, 10:00:00 PM
The comedy (which is actually a spoof of 'Star Wars: Ep. 1' with the DK characters) I wrote summer '00, and I'm currently working on a new fanfic (which will be REEEEEEEEEEALLY, REEEEEEEEEALLY long when completed), which I started this past October.
I've also attempted 2 others, but they were horrible (and I couldn't add anymore to the plot), so I scratched 'em.
This current story actually has an interesting (maybe) background behind it, but I've gone enough off-topic for now.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 18, 2003, 10:58:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 19, 2003, 01:05:00 AM
Chapter 5: Publicly Disgraced
-----------------------------
The Mushroom people were furious. They could take it no longer. They would not be slaves to that malevolent beast. They would not let him hold their beloved princess captive. Rumors spread throughout the Koopa Empire that the slaves were planning to revolt. Bowser took to action immediately.
Mario had been traveling for days. The once beautiful Mushroom Kingdom was a now just a large heap of crumbled ruins. Frequent tremors shook the earth, adding to the demolition. Mario looked around, shuddering that something like this could ever happen. The piping system was down, so it took him much longer than expected to reach his destination.
Then he spotted it; his hopes rose once again. Bowser’s massive castle protruded above the grim skyline like a sore thumb. He was almost there; his heart skipped as he thought about the princess. How frightened she must have been.
As he approached he realized something was astir. It appeared there was a large mob gathered in the courtyard of the castle. They were yelling angrily, and many held vivid torches, contrasting with the gloomy dark-gray sky. Mario came closer, standing far enough away so that he could just catch what was going on without being spotted. The crowd was growing louder and more intense.
A dark figure appeared from behind a large curtain on a balcony above. A deep growl echoed throughout the air, and the crowd immediately silenced in terror. Two guards stood on either side of him as the gruesome Bowser scowled at the spectators below.
“So you think you have the right to rebel against the all-powerful Bowser?! Pathetic fools!” he roared, “Be glad your lowly lives were spared. Unless you want to join your puny friends!” The crowd grew tense.
“Your pitiful lives mean nothing to me! However, since I’m so kind, I’ll give you worms a choice.” His voice became cool and confident. “You can be good little slaves, shut your traps, and do as you’re told, or continue your rebelling and be slaughtered. Either way, I really don’t care. But it’s in your best interest you choose the former.” The people exchanged fearful glances.
“We’ll never surrender to you, you tyrant!” one man shouted, “We’ll never betray Her Highness! Return the Princess!”
The great multitude soon grew out of control, “Yeah! Give us back the Princess!” The crowd continued its shouting; Mario admired their loyalty and determination.
Bowser scowled condescendingly. “So it’s Princess Peach you’re worried about,” he sneered, “Well perhaps you might want to know that she has betrayed *you*.” The people stood aghast. “She has joined my alliance without your petty consent.” The crowd grew into an uproar at this deplorable news.
“That’s a lie!” one of the people shouted, “Of all people, she’d never agree to join your side! She’s pure and just and would do anything to overcome the likes of you!” The crowd shouted in agreement.
“Oh really?” Bowser sneered, “Guards! Bring her here!”
The crowd stiffened as a distraught Peach was led onto the balcony. A crude, dark blanket was wrapped around her, her eyes closed, and her head slumped to her shoulders.
“Tell them, Princess,” Bowser continued softly, “Tell them how you’ve pledged your loyalty to the Koopa Empire.” The crowd gazed at her with deep melancholy. Mario’s heart sank as he saw the sorrow imprinted on his dear, sweet fiancée’s face. *How dare he do this to her!* he thought angrily. The princess lifted her head to the people.
“He’s lying!” she pleaded, “Don’t listen to him! I’d never abandon you! Please…!” Mario fought to keep his composure upon hearing his love’s desperate cries, as his blood boiled with fury toward the evil Koopa king.
Bowser interrupted her. “Why, Princess, you’ve forgotten what you’ve done—how you’ve even broken your moral standards to show your loyalty to me.” Peach’s face grew very pale. The crowd froze.
“Allow me to show you your chaste princess.” As he spoke, Bowser grabbed the blanket draped around her and yanked it off of her. The crowd gasped in disbelief as they saw her protruding abdomen from her crude makeshift dress. Mario’s heart dropped. Peach slumped down and buried her face in her delicate hands.
“There’s no denying it now,” Bowser scoffed.
The princess lifted her head desperately. “Please! It’s not what you think!” she wailed, tears streaming down her face, “I’d never do such a thing! I’d never join his side! Please! He for—”
“Guards! Take her away!” Bowser growled, cutting off the despaired girl’s cries. She screamed as she was carried off behind the balcony curtain.
“Anyone still wanna rebel? I suggest you follow your dear princess’s example and pledge loyalty to the Empire.” The detestable monster laughed menacingly as he exited behind the curtain. The spectators where too shocked to move. And Mario—his fiancée, his one true love, was pregnant—and with the child of his arch-nemesis. His soul was crushed beyond repair as he walked desolately back to the Mushroom Kingdom. And it began to rain.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/19/2003 12:13:20 AM
Post by: Insane Steve on April 19, 2003, 02:02:00 PM
And the one problem with my writing style that I'd LIKE to fix but don't know how is that I complicate things too much. Like in my current story. I think there's something like 25 characters. All original, too. You wouldn't know what's going on even if you read it.
Your story thus far has the perfect blend of complications, and yet it is simple enough to be understood by almost everyone. And that is why I like it so much. And there is the occasional bit of humor, too. ("And it started to rain." Heh.)
I don't want this post too long.... it would interrupt the flow of your story.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Sapphira on April 19, 2003, 03:03:00 PM
I find it better than just focusing on one protagonist--it adds more depth. And if there are too many main characters (like 25), then everyone will get really lost. (Also, when switching between one's point of view, separate it somehow (i.e: --------).
Although now it seems to feature mostly Peach, Bowser and Mario, I assure you, more will be there later.
Part of the key is plot twists, suspense, and leaving you hanging (even though it IS cruel. heheh). (Gah, shows what my English teachers know. I learned this by myself thru reading experience.)
Hmm...sounds like I'm giving an editorial about "how to write a great story." Hehehe :)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Hirocon on April 19, 2003, 09:33:00 PM
Post by: Chupperson Weird on April 19, 2003, 11:53:00 PM
Post by: Insane Steve on April 20, 2003, 06:10:00 PM
1: Not so many characters.
2: Not so many real world referrences.
3: Maybe a couple minor characters.
Actually, I almost came up with a plot for a full, 5 or 6 chapter story in less than a day. I'll finish my current work first, though.
Still, despite the main theme of your story thus far, your natural talent causes it to work perfectly. I love your writings.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Jman on April 20, 2003, 07:33:00 PM
Mario Madness will live forever!
Post by: Sapphira on April 20, 2003, 10:41:00 PM
Chapter 6: Grim Truth
----------------------
Twink had been searching long and hard to find Mario, but his hopes were growing thin. He was racking his brain out, trying to think of where he could be. As he flew over the ruins of Toad Town, it finally occurred to him that Mario could be in the Princess’s Castle. Twink shuddered at how such a once lovely palace had transformed into a crumbling landmark.
It was easy to get in; the beautiful doors were now just a heap of rubble, and much of the exterior had disintegrated. Twink tried searching all the castle’s rooms, but most were blocked with wreckage, including the princess’s bedroom. All seemed hopeless, until he remembered the secret passage Peach had showed him when he first met her. Trying to figure out his whereabouts, Twink discovered that the room with the passage was not blocked.
Slowly, he flew through the dark, silent passageway and emerged at the princess’s unlit fireplace in her bedroom. The lights were off, but there was enough light in order to see, since it was the middle of the grim day. But then Twink heard a noise—it was very faint, yet it was a distinguishable rustling sound.
“Hello…?” the young Star asked timidly, “Is anyone there?” He sensed the presence of another life as the rustling noise grew louder.
“Someone please help me!” It was the cry of a desperate voice. Twink looked around the dim room frantically, trying to find where the voice was coming from.
“Where are you?”
“Over by the closet…” the voice coughed weakly.
Twink found the light switch and flipped it on. Now able to see better, he flew over and saw the image of Toad lying on the floor with a fallen bookcase crushing his short legs.
“Oh my gosh! Are you all right?!” Twink gasped.
“I…I don’t know…” Toad spoke weakly, “I can hardly feel my legs…”
“I’ll try to help…” He feebly attempted to lift the bookcase, but it was no use. “Uhhhgh! It won’t budge!” Twink sighed helplessly.
“Wait! Go find Mario!” he realized.
Twink’s heart skipped, “Mario! Where is he?”
“Last time I heard, he was heading for the basement.”
“Hang on, I’ll go look…”
Going through the secret passage again, Twink eventually made his way to the castle’s basement floor. He stopped as he saw the red-clad hero slumped in a corner, sobbing while looking at a photograph of the princess and him together. Slowly, Twink approached.
“Mario! I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” he said excitedly, “C’mon! Let’s go!”
“Oh… How could this happen…?!” Mario lamented, still engulfed in his thoughts.
“Mario, are you okay?” Twink asked concernedly, “What’s the matter?”
Mario glanced up at him glumly. “Hello, Twink. I’m sorry, but I can’t help you…”
“Mario, right now Toad needs your help. Please, can you tell me what’s wrong later?” He really wanted to know what could cause him to be so upset—he had never seen Mario this way before. “Come on, follow me.”
Slowly, Mario got up and followed the Star Kid back through the way to the princess’s bedroom. He had never known that she had a secret passage to her room before. Toad heard them enter.
“Mario!” he cried happily, “I knew you’d come! Hurry, get this thing off me!” With ease, the plumber lifted the heavy bookcase off the head Mushroom Retainer.
“Are you okay?” Mario asked, helping him up.
“Oww…” Toad winced as he rubbed his injured leg, “I think my leg is broken…” He looked back up to his friend, “Thank you, Mario…” He then turned to Twink, “And thanks for getting help…uh…who are you again?”
“Oh! I’m Twink. I’m the Princess’s Star Guardian.”
“Oh yeah, she told me about you! You helped her and Mario, here, when that stupid Bowser…” Toad’s voice trailed off. “You’re a hero, buddy! And thanks for saving me.”
“Of course!”
“So…why are you here?” Toad asked, “And…the princess… How is…?” but he trailed off once more.
“Well,” Twink started, “Peach sent me to find Mario—and her friends—to see if they were okay…” Mario stared at the ground; something was whirling about in his mind.
Twink continued, “She also sent me to tell you, Mario, that she’s all right…”
“Oh, thank goodness!” Toad sighed in relief, “Everyone’s been so worried about her.”
“She…she also wanted to tell you…” he stammered, “that her…her daughter is fine, too…” Mario closed his eyes and winced as the painful memory resurfaced. Toad was completely shocked at these words.
“W…wha…what did you say?” He knew he couldn’t have heard that right.
“Please don’t be alarmed, but the princess…she is with child,” Twink struggled, “She said it’s due next month…”
Mario still stared silently at the ground, agitated. Toad turned to him. “Mario, did you hear this? This can’t be!” Suddenly he thought of something, but before he could suppress it, the words were already out, “Mario…? You didn’t!?”
The plumber could hold it in no longer. “Of course I didn’t! I would never…!” His voice began to quaver. “…It was Bowser! I saw her, I saw her…! I heard everything! Oh…how could she do this to me…?!” He could no longer fight back the anger and tears, as all his emotions poured out as one.
Toad gasped, “No, no…! It can’t be true…”
“Please, Mario, you must rescue her…!” Twink pleaded, “She’s losing hope! You’re her only reason she’s holding on…! Mario, she loves you!”
“If that were true, then why has she been sleeping with the enemy?!” he retorted, “Literally *and* figuratively! I heard them! She’s formed an alliance with him…!”
“Is that what you think…?” Twink was taken aback. “Mario, you know she, of all people, would never do such a thing!”
“I saw her myself…”
“When?” Twink asked.
“I had set off to rescue her, but when I finally got to the castle… Bowser was speaking to a crowd. It was terrible! My love…she betrayed everything…! Me, her people, everything she believes in, and of all things…herself! How could she…? With…with *him*, of all people…?” Mario shook his head in incredulity.
“Mario…she would never do that,” Twink stated, “You, and you too, Toad, know her heart better than anyone else in this world…” Mario stared back at the floor.
“Look, I was afraid to tell you this… But Mario, it wasn’t her fault…” Twink paused, “Yes, I know Bowser is the father of this child, and she’s engaged to you…but she isn’t the one who broke her vows…” Mario snorted skeptically. Apparently he just wasn’t getting it.
“Listen! Bowser raped her!” Twink cried. Mario stared at him. “Look, she never wanted anything like this to ever happen! Please, don’t condemn her for something that wasn’t her fault!”
A wave of anguished relief washed over Mario’s face. Then a new anger arose in him.
“How could he…?! Why…?!! He’ll pay for this, I swear by the Stars he will!!” Just as he felt he would burst with fury, sorrow enveloped his heart. “Ohhh…my beautiful princess…!”
“Mario,” Twink spoke softly, “She told me that she would like you to be the father…” The plumber stared at the Star Kid in dismay.
“How can I…? The child is of my nemesis…”
“But also of your love!” Twink shook his head. “I know this is very painful for you, but please, don’t just abandon her like that…”
“…But she’s been sleeping with the enemy…”
“She was forced against her will!” Twink cried. Mario shook his head. “Mario, she still loves you. She laments every day for you. Your love for her is the only thing driving her to live. She has faith in you. She *needs* you! Please…you must save her…!” Twink was distraught.
Mario closed his eyes in deep anguish.
“Oh please, Mario… Do the right thing…” Twink sighed as he slowly flew away, away from the crumbling castle, leaving the plumber alone in his torn emotions.
Edited by - Sapphira on 5/16/2003 9:12:11 PM
Post by: Black Mage on April 20, 2003, 11:08:00 PM
Anyway, when it was posted doesn't matter, I'm just glad you did.
I can't really find much to say that the others haven't touched on, but you did a fantasic job writing this, and I'll keep reading as long as you keep posting.
Thank you, for giving us a chance to read it.
Post by: Screech on April 20, 2003, 11:31:00 PM
The world would be a much cleaner place if people would eat their own trash.
Post by: Insane Steve on April 21, 2003, 08:58:00 PM
I mean, to explain it with a late-night metaphor, You took the undiluted, overly corrosive satirical style I usually use and diluted it for safe usage... that is, so it doesn't burn a hole through everything it touches.
(Gotta love late-night metaphors!)
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Sapphira on April 21, 2003, 09:09:00 PM
Chapter 7: Alone
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One long month had passed. Slowly, Bowser’s vast militia had been taking over the Mushroom World, resulting in many more casualties of innocent people. Over one-fifth of the land was now dominated by the Koopa King, and thousands were suffering. Luckily Mario and Toad were alive, but still the others were unaccounted for. But no one, not even Princess Peach, knew if they were safe, or even where they were, for Twink had not yet returned to tell her.
The princess, still being held at Bowser’s Castle, anxiously awaited for Mario, her knight in shining armor, to come. But secretly her hopes were wearing thin. The baby was due any day now, and slowly Peach had been ticking the days away, resenting Bowser more and more.
It was late morning, and one of Bowser’s servants was sent to give the princess her meal. Cautiously, he entered the room.
“I’ll just leave it here, on this table.” The servant slowly set down the tray.
“Thank you,” she replied. Then a sharp pain surged through her body. “…Aahh…!” she winced, “What was that?!
“Are you all right?” the servant asked concernedly.
“I think so…” she wavered, but another twinge shot through her. “Aahh…! There it is again! It’s the baby…!” She cringed and held her abdomen in agony. The servant was absolutely terrified.
“…I’ll go get help…!” he stammered. The nervous Koopa darted off, leaving the princess by herself, breathing heavily with the stinging pains. Soon Kamek entered the room.
“Is everything all right?” he inquired.
“Does it look like it?!” she snapped. The pain was overwhelmingly unbearable. “Aahh… Help me!” Using his magic wand, a glowing light surrounded them both as they were teleported to the Medical Area.
------------------------
A servant slowly approached the evil king in the Throne Room. “Sir?”
Bowser looked up from his thoughts. “What is it?” he inquired.
“I was sent to tell you that the Princess is going into labor…” He was very nervous.
“Where is she?” Bowser asked.
“In M.A., Sir.” Bowser turned to leave. “Uh…your highness? I heard that it doesn’t look good.” The monarch stared at the young servant, who began to stammer. “The princess is having severe trouble… They said she may have internal bleeding…”
“Oh no…” The Koopa King worriedly brushed past the servant, as he headed for the Medical Area.
------------------------
Several hours had gone by. The Princess warily opened her eyes, as Kamek handed her the newborn child, cleaned and clothed in a pink and blue blanket. Peach stared in wonder at the tiny, little life. Just then, Bowser entered the hospital room.
“Congratulations, Sir,” Kamek stated, “You have a healthy baby girl.” Bowser slowly walked over to the Princess’s bedside and smiled at the small, fragile creature.
“She’s adorable…” he awed, “Peach, may I see her…?”
The princess suddenly realized that he was standing next to her. “No! You get away from her!” she shouted.
“Come now, beautiful,” he spoke softly, “I asked very nicely…”
“I said get away from her!” she recoiled.
“Now don’t make me force you…” Knowing she would not give in, Bowser slowly leaned over to the child. Peach jumped back, the infant held securely in her arms.
“You stay the heck away from my daughter!” she screamed, “How dare you… You’re a monster! This poor child has a disgrace of a father!” The anger boiled inside her. “I don’t wanna ever see your face again!” Quickly, the princess tried to escape to her room, but a fierce pain shot through her side. “Aahh…!” she flinched and fell to her knees, carefully holding the baby.
“Peach! You’re in no condition to do this!” Bowser shouted, “Now hand the infant over to me!”
“Never!” she screamed with anger. But the pain continued to pierce though her. The princess writhed in agony. “What’s wrong…?!” she trembled. Amidst her pain, Bowser grabbed the child from her arms. “My baby!” she shrieked as she futilely reached for her little girl. Kamek gently pushed her back down on the hospital bed.
“Lie down,” he ordered, and reluctantly she obeyed, “You’re bleeding internally…” The princess looked at him with terrified eyes.
“Am I going to…die?” she quavered.
“Sooner or later…”
Bowser set the infant down in a crib; he was furious with the Magikoopa’s statement. “What’s that supposed to mean?!” he growled.
“How much time do I have left…?” she asked, terrified.
“…A few years…max…with intense treatment…” Kamek spoke slowly.
“Noooo!!!” Bowser roared in animosity, slamming his fists down on a table.
“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do… We can only prolong it…” he sadly stated.
“What happens next…?” Peach whispered in fright. Kamek looked at her troubled eyes.
“Well…basically you’ll feel the pain you have now…but gradually, it’ll grow worse…” he said softly, “It looks like you’ll have to lie down most of the time… You’ll get weaker…”
“Noooo!” Bowser bellowed, “Uhgghh!! Isn’t there anything else we can do?!”
“I’m sorry… To be honest, she’s lucky she’s alive now…” Kamek looked away.
Peach glanced over to the little girl in the crib. “…What about my daughter…?” she asked concernedly.
“She appears to be perfect healthy,” Kamek stated, glad about the change of subject.
“Is she…normal looking…?” the princess questioned.
The Magikoopa glanced at the tiny infant. “Well, since she’s the first human-Koopa hybrid, it’s hard to tell. But she doesn’t appear deformed in any way, if that’s what you mean…”
The princess closed her eyes in distress. “I’d like to go back to my room…” she stated.
“You really should spend the night here,” Kamek replied bluntly, “so we can keep a close watch on your health…” Bowser picked up the child and headed for the door.
“What are you doing?!” Peach shrieked, “Give her back!”
“Relax! She’ll be fine…” he replied nonchalantly. The door swished shut as the princess helplessly placed her head back down on the pillow. She closed her eyes as they began to well up. *…Oh Mario…* she thought, *Please hurry…* Never in her life had she felt so frightened and alone.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Sapphira on April 21, 2003, 09:09:00 PM
--------------------
If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/21/2003 9:18:11 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 22, 2003, 10:50:00 PM
Chapter 8: Intricate Pursuit
-----------------------------
Mario and Toad walked about the Princess’s Castle, progressively cleaning up the wreckage. Slowly, they managed to start building a shelter, to protect them from the Koopa army and also from the frequent tremors. Their world was no longer a safe haven. While working, the Mushroom Retainer broke the silence.
“Mario?” he asked slowly, “What’s up with you…? You seem…different somehow…” The plumber looked up from his work.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“I don’t know…” He paused. “I mean, you’ve changed somehow. Ever since the Princess was kidnapped, you just haven’t seemed yourself…”
“I’m fine…” Mario replied plainly.
“Are you sure? ’Cuz ever since she left, it seems like you’ve been really depressed.” Toad then quickly averted his eyes to the crumbling tile floor, “I mean, I know you set off to rescue her but… what happened? Especially after you came back, you’ve been moping around a lot. I know something’s up…”
Mario sighed. “You’re right…”
Toad looked at him gently. “I know you’re upset about the Princess…I am, too. But you seem so…agitated…but, yet compassionate…”
“H…how did you know…?” he asked, astonished, “You should be a counselor or something.”
“Well, it sort of comes with the job description…” he trailed off.
“I…I know she would never abandon us… But…it’s just so hard to imagine that…that…” He shook his head in disgust. “That she and…and *Bowser*… A *child*…? Ughh! It just sickens me that he would do such a thing…!”
“I know…I know…” Toad agreed. Mario looked back at him.
“I…I’ve always been able to sense her… But something’s different… Ever since I found out…” He stared at the floor.
“Mario, please, you have to save her.”
“I know, I know,” he shook his head in dismay. Suddenly, he felt something; it was a strange intuition, “Wait a second… Something’s terribly wrong…! I can feel her…” he struggled, “Peach! The baby! No…! Peach is…is dying…!” Mario collapsed, falling on his knees and shaking.
“Mario…!” Toad shrieked.
The plumber fought to get himself up. “We have to save her!” he shouted.
“Is she okay?! What’s wrong?!” The Mushroom Retainer was terrified; he knew Mario always had a keen sense for trouble, especially when it was about the princess.
“Wait…! There’s something else…” Mario closed his eyes, trying to focus. “I don’t know what it is…but for some reason…something seems like…like it’s been…fulfilled…”
Toad looked at him confusedly. “Mario…what do you mean…?”
“I don’t know…” he shook his head, “Come on, we have to go…now…!”
------------------------
A few days had passed, and Princess Peach was finally able to go back to her room, granted that she stayed in bed. She could get up, but since it was very painful she rarely did. It was midday, and the saddened princess stared hopelessly at the sky blue ceiling. How it contrasted so much with the way she felt—the pleasant clouds painted on a bright, cheery blue sky; it made her miserable. She sighed heavily, and there came a light tapping from her balcony window. Peach leaned forward as she excitedly recognized the figure.
“Twink!” she shrieked happily, “Hang on…” Slowly, the princess rolled over and forced herself off the bed while she winced. “Oww… I’m coming…” Although painful, she managed to make it to the door and opened it for the little Star.
“Princess! Are you all right…?” he asked, noticing she was in pain. “Here, lie back down…” He led her back to her bed, and she flinched as she obeyed.
“Oh Twink…!” she managed, “You came back!” Her face slowly dimmed. “Where have you been…?”
“It’s a long story…” he replied, “But I’ve been looking for your friends…”
“Are they okay?! Did you find Mario…?”
“Well…I found Toad…” he stalled, avoiding a direct answer. He just couldn’t bring himself to tell her of Mario’s tentative reaction.
“Oh, is he all right…?” A hopeful look gleamed in her eyes.
“Don’t worry, he’s fine now. He’s been hiding at your castle…”
“Oh…good,” she sighed in relief, “Was Mario there? Did you tell him?” Twink looked at her compassionately. He couldn’t hurt her—she had been through enough anguish already.
“I…I’m sorry…” he stared painfully at the floor, “Don’t worry, I’ll keep looking…”
“I hope he’s okay… Oh, Mario…” she wavered. A sharp pain tingled up her spine. “Aahh! Oww…!”
“Are you okay?!” Twink cried, “What’s wrong…?!”
“I’m afraid…I have some bad news…” The princess’s eyes welled up and she turned away. The young Star looked at her sorrowfully.
“What is it…?”
“…I…I’m not gonna make it much longer…” Her voice was barely a whisper.
“…What are you saying…?!” he gasped.
“I…I’m going to…die soon…” She closed her eyes as a lone tear trickled down her soft cheek.
“Oh…Princess…”
“At very most, I have only a few years…” She glanced back up at her starry friend. “Please…you must watch over my daughter…”
“Oh…how is she…?”
“She’s very healthy…and beautiful… Please… I don’t know where she is… You…must find her… Help her… Tell…Mario…”
Twink looked at her slowly, “H…have you given her a name…?”
“…Melony…” Those were her last words as her consciousness faded into darkness.
“Oh…Princess… I’ll try… for you…”
------------------------
Slowly, the next morning had come. Bowser had seen the princess lying quietly, unconscious on her bed, and he knelt down beside her. Melancholy flowed through him as he stroked her golden hair.
“Oh…Peach… I’m so sorry… How can you ever forgive me…?” He paused sadly as if she would respond. “…Don’t worry… I’ll care for our child more than anything in this world…aside from you…”
Slowly, the princess awoke, opening her crystal blue eyes. Immediately, she saw her one greatest fear and torment, and she shrieked in terror.
“Bowser! What are you doing here…?!”
His hardened heart sprang with life. “Peach…! You’re awake…! Don’t worry, it’s okay…” he tried to calm her.
“I thought I told you to stay the heck away from me!” she screamed, “Where’s Melony…?!”
The Koopa King looked at her confusedly. “Melony…?”
“My child!!” Peach shouted indignantly, “Where is she?! Give her back…!”
“She’s fine…!” he growled. His thoughts drifted to the tiny baby. “…Melony… What a beautiful name…my little girl…”
“She’s not yours!” the princess screamed resentfully, “You don’t deserve to be the father! Give her back to me…! …Aaahh…!” she cried as another sharp pain surged through her body.
Bowser gently pushed her back down. “Peach! Please, calm down… You’re only hurting yourself…” The princess turned away. “Melony…is fine,” he continued, “I can’t return her to you…not yet… I’m sorry…”
“Get outta my room!” she cried glumly, “…And let me die in peace…”
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/22/2003 10:38:42 PM
Post by: Black Mage on April 22, 2003, 11:07:00 PM
As I've been giving you plenty of praise, I also have been looking for something to criticize, yet, I've found nothing. I'll keep looking though. ;-)
Anyway, I find that I personally like the scenes concerning Mario and his feelings. While the story has been largely about Peach, and with good reason, I like reading how Mario is taking in everything. Although, it makes me wonder what significance the Koopa Kids had in the earlier part of the story, I guess I'll just have to wait and see.
Post by: Sapphira on April 22, 2003, 11:23:00 PM
(That is, if I finish editing and revising the rest of the story.) I've started Part 2, BTW, but just barely.
I too like, particularly, the scenes w/ Mario's feelings. So far, I think CH 5's my favorite. I actually added that scene after the story was completed. (Although I had to change a few things b/c of it.)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/22/2003 10:42:48 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 23, 2003, 09:01:00 PM
Now, my last update for a while...
Chapter 9: Held Close
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Four long years had slowly passed. Princess Peach was scarcely a ghost, her condition growing worse by each following day. Now very weak and completely bedridden, her longing hope that Mario would come was the only thing struggling to keep her alive. She prayed every day that he would hurry.
Melony lived a somewhat average life, aside from the fact that a devastating war was taking place. The only person she could latch on to was her father, the only one she knew who cared about her. On occasion she was allowed to visit her mother, but for the most part she never got to really know her. Melony loved her mother very much, but she could only picture her as a forlorn, dying woman.
Nearly half the Mushroom World was now conquered by the atrocious King Bowser, including much of Dinosaur Land. They had put up a persistent battle, but the Koopa army eventually defeated them. Luckily, Yoshi’s Island was still safe; since it was a remote island, it was one of the hardest places to attack.
Slowly, Mario and Toad had set out to rescue the princess. It was a very long, harsh journey—way worse than it could have ever possibly been in the past. The blood-filled land was charred and crumbling, while the frequent tremors of the earth only added to the vast demolition.
Helping those in need along the way, Yoshi continued searching for his missing friends, but thus far he had had no luck.
In the meantime, two vague figures stood cold, alone and frightened, trapped in an underground cave from a recent tremor. They could only hope that they would get out somehow.
“Oh… It’s no use…” a terrified voice cried, “We’re never gonna get out…”
Luigi stood desperately digging at their seemingly only place for an exit. “Come…on… I almost got it…” he grunted. Just at the last moment, however, the tunnel completely collapsed, sending dirt everywhere and crushing their last hopes of escape.
“No…!” he shouted, his voice echoing throughout the small cave.
A frightened Princess Daisy clung to a nearby cave wall, making sure she was near to Luigi.
“Oh… It’s hopeless…” she whimpered, “What are we gonna do…?”
Luigi glanced around the cave, formulating his thoughts. “Well…on the plus side, no one will find us to capture us…”
Daisy made a slight huff. “Yes, but neither can anyone find us to help us…! Are you crazy…? We can’t stay here! We’ll die…” She sighed miserably. “Oh…Luigi…” Her head drooped, and she shook it in despair. The green-clad hero placed a comforting hand on her arm.
“Don’t worry, we’ll be fine. Just…hang on…” Driven by some sudden impulse, Luigi ran toward the sealed opening and lunged at it with all his might. But it only trapped them in further. Another tremor shook the earth, causing more rocks and dust to fall. Although normally a very rational person, he started to panic.
“Auugh!” he screamed, “We’re gonna die!”
“Please…!” the brunette princess cried, “You’re not helping…!” She knew he was the only one who could help her remain calm. But if he lost it also, she didn’t know what she would do. Seeing Luigi neurotic absolutely terrified her. He quickly subsided though, and coming back to her, he gazed into her searching blue eyes. She suddenly felt a strange sense of tranquility amidst their dire situation.
“…Daisy… Before we die, there’s something I need to tell you…”
She gently returned his gaze, “What is it…?” she whispered, still frightened. Luigi placed her hands inside his, helping to calm her.
“Daisy… I love you with all my heart. Not a day goes by without my love for you growing stronger. I don’t want anything to happen to you…” He slowly pursed his lips together. “Daisy…will you be with me? Will you…marry me…?”
Her eyes still met with his, a tear rolled down her tender cheek.
“Oh, Luigi…” she cried, “I thought you’d never ask… Yes, I will!” Slowly, a smile curved across her lips, and they embraced in one another’s arms.
A faint rustle of rocks was heard. Suddenly, a light emanated in from above, as a voice echoed throughout the dim cave.
“Hello…? Is someone in there…?” Luigi recognized the voice immediately, and once again their hearts were filled with hope.
“Yoshi?!” he called excitedly, “We’re trapped! Can you help us?!”
The familiar dinosaur squinted. “Luigi? Is that you…? I’ve been looking all over for you!” he exclaimed elatedly, “Here, I’ll try to help!”
------------------------
Now just past four years old, Melony continued to grow into a lovely young child. She looked nearly human, except for her clawed feet and the large, spiked blue shell on her back. Her hair was a beautiful strawberry-blonde, a shade perfectly between her mother’s blonde and father’s red hair. Her big blue eyes held an enchanting gaze which sparkled with curiosity and life.
For the most part, she got along fine with her older brothers, the Koopalings, only occasionally bothering them, as little sisters often do. Her sister Wendy, however, made it very clear that she hated Melony, constantly yelling and resenting her. It didn’t help any that she was forced to share her room with her baby half-sister, who was now a curious preschooler while she was an overreacting teenager.
“Melony!! Give that back!” Wendy shrieked. The child held a gorgeous magic wand in her small hands, her eyes transfixed on the stunning sapphire-like jewel at the tip.
“It’s pretty… I wanna see it…”
“You’ll break it! It’s mine!” Wendy screamed as she snatched the wand away from her. Carefully, she placed it back in its cased stand. “I told you a thousand times to leave my stuff alone! Now go away!”
Melony reluctantly left the room, sadly enduring the mistreatment from her sister. In the corridor, she spotted Lemmy, her favorite brother, walking down the hallway, carrying something in his arms. He stopped when he came to her and gave her a friendly smile.
“Hey, Shorty!”
Melony glanced at the object he was holding. “What’re you doing?” she asked hopefully, “Can I play?!”
“Sorry, but Dad sent me to do some work. You’d just get bored.”
Her face dimmed and she made a frown. “But I never getta do anything…” She sighed dejectedly. “Where’s Daddy?”
Lemmy shrugged. “I dunno. I think he’s in your mom’s room.” He continued down the hallway as the young little princess rushed off to Peach’s bedroom. Without knocking, Melony quickly barged in through the doors.
“Daddy! Wendy’s being—” but she cut herself off as she noticed Bowser was not there. “Daddy…?”
From her bed, Princess Peach saw the child there and called to her. “Hi Sweetie, come here. Your father’s not here.” Melony quickly rushed to her mother’s bedside.
“Mommy, are you okay…?” she asked sadly, “Daddy says you’re getting worse…”
The princess gently stroked her daughter’s soft cheek. “Oh… Honey… it’s gonna be okay…” she said weakly. Melony climbed onto the bed to be near her mother.
“Mommy, please don’t die…” she sniffled, “I won’t have a mommy to love anymore…”
Peach struggled to keep her composure. “Oh…you poor baby…” she quavered, fighting back the tears, “My little angel…I’ll always be there for you…”
Melony sniffled, “What do you mean…?”
The saddened princess looked compassionately into the child’s misty eyes. “You may not see me anymore, but I’ll always be with you… In your heart…” She gave a slight smile. “I’ll always still love you…and you can still love me…”
Melony wiped her nose and sniffed. “Are you sure…?” she asked hopefully, her lip quivering. Peach swallowed the large lump engulfing in her throat and the depths of her heart as she watched her daughter’s seeking eyes.
“Sweetheart…don’t worry…” she whispered, “Come here…” She held the child close and rocked her back and forth, each crying softly and seeking comfort in the other’s arms.
Post by: Jman on April 24, 2003, 05:10:00 PM
Mario Madness will live forever!
Post by: Insane Steve on April 24, 2003, 08:44:00 PM
(And I've actually laughed so much reading this. Not the intended reaction, I'm sure, but... I think it's kind of funny at times. Of course, those times aren't supposed to be funny.)
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Sapphira on April 24, 2003, 10:47:00 PM
Anyway, I said earlier that it was reeeeally long. It's actually novel-length. Let's see...it's 110 pages written, 55 front and back (college rule). And also, it's written in play-like format, so mostly it's only dialouge--the descriptive paragraphs REALLY shortened.
Oh, I also told CW I would explain about what happened in CH 1. Bowser loves the princess, yes; it's fairly obvious such as in PM. However, remember that Bowser is evil. He knows not how to love--only to hate. Peach is the only person he's felt love for, but since he's evil, that love is distorted, for he cannot comprehend what love truly is. What he thinks is an act of love is actaully an act of violence. And thus, this is how the terrible downward spiral began.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/24/2003 9:49:18 PM
Post by: Hirocon on April 24, 2003, 11:09:00 PM
At times, I think that this story is TOO serious. This would not be a problem if you had held back on the serious issues for a couple of chapters to gradually develop the characters. But when an issue such as rape is discussed over a character that has never received any serious development in any of the Mario lore (you can blame Nintendo for this), it sounds somewhat cheesy and awkward.
However, now that you are deep into the story, this is not a problem. This may seem random,but I particularly liked the confrontation between Bowser and Peach immediately after Melony's birth. I found it touching that Boswer passively accepted Peach's assertion that the child was named Melony. Some might interperet this as apathy on Bowser's part, but I interpereted it to mean that Bowser realized the emotional termoil Peach was going through, and sought to passify her even at the expense of the chance to name his own child.
I also liked the dialogue between Melony and Lemmy, in which Lemmy calls Melony "shorty." I'm not sure why. It just struck a chord with me.
Keep up the good work!
Edited by - Hirocon on 4/24/2003 10:12:02 PM
Post by: Sapphira on April 25, 2003, 12:10:00 AM
Hmm...I never really thought about that scene in that way, but maybe subconsciously I did, or something. Anyway, I goes to show you Bowser really does love the princess, even though it is somewhat distorted.
The scene with Melony and Lemmy I thought was kind of cute, kind of shining a lighter aspect of the story admist this terrible, dark ordeal.
I'm glad so far everyone seems to like it, besides the fact that it's a bit...controversial. Anyway, critizism and compliments are welcomed alike. I won't take personal offense to it.
I'll try to finish the alterations on CH 10 as soon as I can, so I can post the rest of Part 1.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Insane Steve on April 25, 2003, 02:33:00 PM
To understand how I can even begin to find this funny, you have to understand my life thus far. As a little child, everyone insulted me for no apparent reason. In 2nd grade, my teacher HATED me. My mind became twisted. My life was ruined forever before I even turned 9. *Come to think of it... that might be an idea for the 4th story I write. That's for another thread, though.*
Thus, seeing the way I was treated, I can find humor in the oddest places. One of the oddest is in a truly dire situation, where someone is being abused badly. And I've always hated the princess, so when I read this, I find it funny in a sadistic sort of way.
And it is because the controversial issue is brought about in such an eloquent (Word usage.... hmmmm, that's not really the word I want. Ah well) manner that I am so compelled to read it. I can't wait for the other ... 75%. (Wow.)
PS: Well off topic, but I finally got a title for my 3rd fanfic. I am seriously calling it "The Third Attempt"... but not for the obvious reason. There's a point in the story... well, I'll post it.... eventually. That is, when I can get the bile to do so...
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Bluto on April 25, 2003, 10:59:00 PM
I''m not lazy, I''m just... uh...
Post by: Sapphira on April 26, 2003, 12:06:00 AM
Chapter 10: Final Farewell
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The heartbreaking morning was finally gone and already the gloomy afternoon was heading toward its end. A faint tapping was heard from the balcony, and slowly the elegant glass doors were unlocked and opened.
“Twink…!” Princess Peach exclaimed, awaking from her weary dreams, “You finally came back…!”
“Princess! I just talked with Mario!” he spoke enthusiastically, “He and Toad are looking for you. He told me he’d be honored to be the father of your child.” Twink had been thrilled at Mario’s change of heart. “Hang in there! He’s coming…!”
Peach smiled ardently. “That’s wonderful…!” Her face suddenly became very sullen. “But…it’s too late…”
The Star Kid looked at her confusedly. “What do you mean…? Peach…you’ll be fine…!”
“Twink… Please, you have to tell him this…” she struggled, “…Tell him…that I love him…and I’ll never forget him…”
“Oh, Princess…! Not now…! Not when he’s this close…”
“Tell him…” she pressed painfully, “it’s not his fault…and there was nothing he could have done…”
“Please…Peach…don’t give up now…!” he cried desperately.
“…Tell him…to never give up hope…and that the prophecy has been fulfilled…” She began to quiver, the tears struggling to stay within her utmost being.
“…Princess…” Twink sighed sorrowfully. “W…what prophecy…?” he slowly asked.
She suddenly began coughing violently, heaving between each gasp for precious air. It felt as though her insides were being forced up through her throat. There was a slight taste of blood and mucus in her mouth.
“Peach! Are you okay?!” Twink shrieked.
The princess swallowed her pain and managed to speak. “…The…the last night I saw him…he told me of a prophecy he heard about…”
“What is it…?” he scarcely whispered.
She rubbed her temples; it was so hard to concentrate. “‘…A child…of Good and Evil shall come to rise… Good will perish… and Evil will reign…” She closed her eyes trying hard to remember. “…But…but the child will destroy the Evil…and Good will prevail once more…’”
“…I…I don’t understand…”
“Don’t you see…? …Melony…is the child…”
“Your daughter…?” he thought for a moment, “Wait a minute… Good and Evil… Is that…*you* and…Bowser…?!”
Peach nodded weakly, “…Evil has already begun to prevail… And soon Good will perish…”
Twink gasped and shook his head in apprehension. “Nooo…! That can’t be right…! …You…have to…die…?”
“Twink…listen to me…” she pleaded, “It’s already too late… This was my destiny…”
“Nooo! It doesn’t have to be…!” he cried, “Princess…! It could mean something else…! Please…you don’t know…!”
Peach looked sadly into his troubled eyes. “Twink…it’s too late… There’s nothing that can be done…”
“But, Peach…!”
Afflicted, she made herself continue, “Please…you must…tell Mario…” She forced a weak smile, “…Goodbye, Twink… I’ll never forget you…”
“Princess…! Nooo…!”
------------------------
The renowned hero and head Royal Mushroom Retainer had made significant progress on their journey to rescue Princess Peach. Bowser’s massive Castle was now in view as dark storm clouds engulfed the dreary evening sky. It was just starting to get dark when slight flashes of lightning were seen at a distance, followed by their faint rumbles. It started drizzling.
Toad instinctively placed out his hand to feel the raindrops. “Oh no… Not another storm…”
Mario glanced up in agreement and sighed. Suddenly he felt an overwhelming intuition. “…It…it seems like the Princess…!” he exclaimed, “She needs me right now…! Something’s wrong…!” The lightning began to strike closer and more frequently.
“Well, come on then, we have to hurry…”
A bright flash emanated from above, creating an unbearably loud roar.
“Peach…!” Mario suddenly shrieked as an excruciating sharp pain pierced through his soul. He collapsed to his knees, grasping his head in pain. The lightning seemed to encompass all around them, growing intensely faster and louder.
“Mario…!” Toad screamed in terror, “Are you okay?! What’s wrong…?!”
The plumber violently shook his head, it throbbing from the intense pain. “…Peach…!” he gasped, “…I…I’m losing her…!”
“What do you mean…?” he asked neurotically.
Mario winced in excruciating agony. “Up there…” he struggled, desperately trying to suppress the pain, “She’s up there… That balcony… There’s not much time…” Frantically he pulled a Cape Feather from his pocket and flew up toward the small balcony.
“Mario…!” Toad shouted. But he was now alone.
Mario soon landed on the balcony, carefully avoiding being spotted. He peered through the glass French doors and frantically scanned the elegant, dim room. He gasped. Peach was lying in her bed, helpless, frail, and terribly pallid. Overwhelmed by seeing her and in such weakness and frailty, the plumber frantically pushed on the golden door handle. It was locked.
Mario screamed her name, hopelessly banging on the doors. His heart pounded rapidly. He couldn’t get in! What would he do? Desperately he pushed the handle down one last time, beads of sweat forming on his brow. The doors swung open.
Quickly he rushed over to the princess’s bedside. Mario placed a hand to her soft face and frantically searched her closed eyes for a sign of life.
“Peach…” he whispered shakily. Very weakly, her eyes fluttered open.
“Mario…?” Her voice was just barely a faint whisper. “Is that you…?”
“Shh…shh… I’m here now… Don’t worry…”
The princess gave a weak smile. “You came…”
Mario touched her fragile hand. “Shh…Everything will be fine, everything will be fine… We need to get you out of here…” Slowly he leaned over and very gently held her up. Peach blinked warily, barely able to move on her own accord. Mario felt a terrible lump starting to form in the back his throat.
“I held out…for you…” she quavered weakly. Mario struggled to force down the growing overwhelming lump. His voice was about to break.
“Peach…” His eyes began to well up. He swallowed hard.
The princess looked weakly into his eyes and touched his face. “I love you…” she whispered as her eyes fluttered open one last time.
“Peach…” He felt her body go limp as he held her in his arms. He shook her, tears now streaming down his once emotionally strong face. “Peach…”
Mario closed his eyes painfully. Gently he laid her back down and pressed his forehead against hers as he sobbed bitterly. He looked into her beautiful, lifeless face and softly kissed her sweet lips one last time.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/30/2003 1:33:06 PM
Post by: Dairy King on April 26, 2003, 12:44:00 AM
Since everyone is revealing plans for fan fic, I may as well reveal mine.
Legend of Zelda meets Super Mario type story. I give you the basic plot. Gannondorf fuses LOZ universe with TMK. Cool, huh? I thought having like Ganno-Bowser, and the Combined Warrior(Mario and Link. Duh.) THey gotta destroy and reseal passageway between the dimensions. Think of how cool the monsters would be! A Boo and Poe could combine and form a ...snicker snicker.... Poo!! Ha ha ha ha ha! But seriously, thats my idea, and don't anybody steal it!
CONGRATULATIONS!
The absolute incarnation of evil, Adolf Hitler, lies in a pool of his own blood. His wrinkled, crimson splattered visage still strains, a jagged- toothed rictus trying to cry out. Insane even in death. Your lips pinched in bitter victory, you kick his head off his remains and spit on his corpse.
-Wolfenstein 3d, 3rd Episode
Post by: Sapphira on April 26, 2003, 11:05:00 AM
WOW. I'm SHOCKED and AMAZED! I had no idea how good my story was! You actually would rate it as one of the BEST?--up there with PROFESSIONAL authors?! *Blushes and grins ear-to-ear* Thank you! ^_^
Wow, I can't believe I'm actually inspiring others to write/finish their own fanfics! Hopefully you guys'll post 'em someday! :)
(Sweet! 50th post!) :)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/26/2003 10:06:56 AM
Post by: Bluto on April 26, 2003, 01:23:00 PM
I''m not lazy, I''m just... uh...
Post by: Sapphira on April 26, 2003, 01:30:00 PM
I said that exact same thing, too--"I don't know how well it'll be recieved..."
Post it! I'll read it, I assure you. :)
After my story, I can handle just about anything. :) (Obviously you haven't read the rest of my story, nor the current one I'm working on, which is even more... controversial...heheh...)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Dairy King on April 26, 2003, 02:18:00 PM
I wanted to do a sort of DBZ theme-ish thing with my fan-fic.. Sorta serious, yet with humor sprinkled over top.. Just think.. Mario.. in a tunic!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!
Post by: Dairy King on April 26, 2003, 02:19:00 PM
Edited by - Dairy King on 4/26/2003 1:24:12 PM
Post by: Dairy King on April 26, 2003, 02:19:00 PM
Edited by - Dairy King on 4/26/2003 1:34:02 PM
Post by: Insane Steve on April 26, 2003, 03:58:00 PM
Seriously, you've inspired more people than you think. I've almost finished my 3rd story. I still don't know if I want to post it.... and if I do, I will wait until you are done with this one.
Anyways, 2 other reasons I am trying to write again:
2: I took this "What style of writing do you have?" quiz. After taking it... it told that I "wasn't a writer". I'll prove it wrong.
3: Ok, let's say I'm not a writer. And I KNOW I'm not an artist. So what am I? That's right, unartistic. And what happens to unartistic people? They become drug addicts! I seriously do NOT want to die homeless and starving at the age of 25 (Even though I doubt I'll live to be 25 anyways, in todays world) because I'm spending all my money on drugs due to my lack of artistic talent.
And thus, I'm trying to perfect my writing skill in an attempt to gain SOME artistic ability, and also to not wind up a stoner.
Yep, that's how I think. Imagine a story written in MY style of thinking, and imagine sitting through the resulting drivel. Of course, the third story is not really written like THAT... It's more serious. But about 1/100th as serious of this.... because there are still many (intentionally) funny moments in it. Ah well.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Sapphira on April 26, 2003, 04:52:00 PM
Come on people! Keep writing! Go! Go! Go!
Anyway, Steve, it's gonna be a REEEEEEEEEEEEEALLY long time before I finish the entire story. If you saw how poorly written the original manuscript is, you'd understand why. *Shudders, thinking about Part 3* Luckily, Part 2 (Which I added a long time after finishing the rest of the story) is pretty well written, so I won't have to revise it as much.
Hehe...I feel kinda bad now... I'm VERY, VERY artistic, and apparently a good author. (Also intelligent and attractive and funny, but I'll stop now). I guess to sum myself up in one word: creative.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Insane Steve on April 26, 2003, 05:03:00 PM
I might post it tomorrow. Maybe.
Actually, I'm a LOT more afraid of it not being read at all than people reading it and saying it's bad. If the latter occurs, I can figure out what's wrong and try again in a better view. No harm done there. If the former occurs, it makes me feel... unwanted and unrespected, actually. Makes me want to stop doing everything productive due to the fear that no one would care.
That, and my 3rd story only has one original character! And he doesn't appear until Chapter 3! I'm sdo proud! ... Kind of.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Dairy King on April 26, 2003, 05:22:00 PM
I'm not a real coherent writer, but the stories I've thought of defintly have alot of potential. When mine is finished, I'll be sure to post it here. If you want, I can give a smidge of what I've wrote.
A cool breeze swept through the castle as the Hero of time cautiously walked up the giant flight of stairs leading to the chamber of Gannondorf, the evil wizard. As he neared the room, Link could hear the desolate tones of an organ, playing something that sounded like opera. Link hated opera.
He kicked open the door, and stood as he searched the room. Empty. Slowly he edged farther into the room, untill he was past the door frame. As soon as he was, the door slammed shut, and locked.
"Cripes!" Link shouted, unaware of who or what was behind him.
"Welcome... Hero of Time." a deep voice boomed. Link quickly spun around, and drew his sword out of its scabbard. The voice was that of Gannondorf.
"I hope you liked my castle... As it shall be your tomb!!" he screamed, throwing a ball of energy at Link.
I hope you enjoyed that. It's my style of writing. Thats just the beginning of the story. It's really good!!(so far)
CONGRATULATIONS!
The absolute incarnation of evil, Adolf Hitler, lies in a pool of his own blood. His wrinkled, crimson splattered visage still strains, a jagged- toothed rictus trying to cry out. Insane even in death. Your lips pinched in bitter victory, you kick his head off his remains and spit on his corpse.
-Wolfenstein 3d, 3rd Episode
Post by: Sapphira on April 26, 2003, 06:56:00 PM
Dairy King, your story sounds really good and well-written so far, even though it's not Mario-related (at least it gave me that impression). I'd like to read it. :)
Don't make me feel like I'm the only person who'd post a fanfic here, people!
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Insane Steve on April 26, 2003, 07:07:00 PM
It isn't long at all, only 7 chapters and an Eplilouge (I think that's the word I want) and it has about 1/5th the major characters as my 2nd fanfic... (And 1/20th the amount of original characters) so you shouldn't get confused. I think.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Dairy King on April 26, 2003, 10:49:00 PM
I am poetry in motion. You are gibberish in neutral.
Post by: Dr. Mario on April 28, 2003, 02:07:00 PM
What is wrong with this guy?
...Besides everything!
Post by: Bluto on April 28, 2003, 08:47:00 PM
Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Post by: Sapphira on April 28, 2003, 09:04:00 PM
I still get a little lump in my throat each time I read the scene with Melony and Peach (which is sorta related to something that happened in my real life), and when she dies in Mario's arms... so sad...
Sorry...now *I'm* rambling. Anyhoo, the only time I can work on the story is in the late morning/earlier afternoon, when everyone's gone.
I hope you'll continue your story, Bluto.
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Jman on April 30, 2003, 07:44:00 AM
Waluigi, how unoriginal can you get?
Post by: Sapphira on April 30, 2003, 11:45:00 AM
Chapter 11: Relentless Tears
---------------------------
Bower had entered the princess’s room and found the young, beautiful mother of his child as a fragile, lifeless body. He had dreaded this fearful day, and never in all his life had he felt so alone and disheartened. He made a dreadful cry—a terrible, mourning roar heard all throughout the entire kingdom, putting a deep fear and pity into the hearts of those still alive.
Tears streamed down Bowser’s hideous face as he gently rested it against the princess’s soft, rosy cheek, stoking her golden hair with his scaly claw. A light tapping came from the door, and slowly the head Magikoopa entered the room.
“…Y…Your Majesty…?” he asked gently, “Is there anything…..?”
“Please, just leave me alone…” the monarch murmured desolately.
“I am so sorry, Your Highness… Please tell me if I can do anything…”
“Just go away…” Bowser sighed dejectedly, “Tell the land…today is a day of mourning.”
Kamek sadly glanced at the lifeless Peach. “…W…what should we do…with the body…?”
A fierce, burning anger arose from within the depths of his soul. “You will *not* refer to my love that way!” he roared in desperation.
“…I…I’m sorry…” Kamek cowered apologetically.
Bowser lifted the princess’s head, carefully propping her neck and back with his claw. “We…must preserve her…” he slowly stated.
“How…?”
His hardened heart grew desperate. “I don’t know!” he shouted vehemently, “Find a way! Just…put her in stasis or something…!”
“W…why…do you want to do that, Sir…? Kamek asked timidly.
Bowser closed his eyes and shook his head in agony. “Maybe…we can find a cure for her…and can bring her back…”
“But, Sir…!” he cried, “We’ve been working on that for four years now… We can’t…”
“Find a way!” he interrupted frantically, “We have to get her back…!”
“…Sir…there’s nothing we can do…”
“That was an order, Kamek!”
He sighed vainly. “Yes, Sir… In the meantime we’ll put her in stasis…”
“Good… Now, go!” Kamek hopelessly left the room, wondering how he would possibly be able to do as his king had asked. Bowser gave a forlorn sigh, and holding the lifeless Peach close to him, he caressed her limp hand and softly kissed her angelic face.
“Don’t worry, baby; we’ll get you back…”
------------------------
The rain poured ceaselessly to the demolished ground. Slaves of Bowser’s terrible Empire toiled on the land, filled with hopelessness and despair, as the minor tremors continued sporadically. It was as if the whole earth was crying out.
Yoshi was able to rescue Luigi and Daisy, and they continued to hide in the cave, creating a solid hidden entrance. Luckily Yoshi had brought plenty of supplies and rations to last them quite a while.
Mario had silently exited the princess’s room, too numb and despondent to do anything more. Meeting up with Toad, the heartbroken plumber had told the small Mushroom Retainer the devastating news.
Sorrowfully the two turned around and began walking home, wet tears stained on their faces and eyes, creating a surreal, bleary line of vision. Amidst the gloomy scene, a loud screech sounded from the castle’s intercom system. Immediately everyone looked for the source of the noise. A Hammer Brother stood on an alcove above and spoke into a megaphone connected to the system.
“Attention to all in the land!” the voice crackled, “His Highness has just declared today as a day of mourning, in the loving memory of Princess Peach Toadstool, who has just passed away. Everyone is to return to their homes or quarters to mourn for the rest of the day. You will be informed later of when to return …”
An expression of agony spread across each individual’s face. Thunder raged throughout the dreary sky as everyone glumly walked back to the slave encampment.
The terrible reminder forced a second dagger in the heroes’ already-plunging hearts. Reality sank in, and Toad began to shudder uncontrollably, his eyes welling terribly so that everything became a massive blur of monotonous gray. Mario closed his eyes tightly, remembering his love’s final breath in his arms. The plumber collapsed, trembling, the bitter tears running endlessly down his face. “…Peach…! …Oh, Peach…”
The land was now completely deserted, as the heroes lay on the cold, wet cement, hidden, weeping bitterly for the dear princess. She was gone… Loved by all, she was actually gone… The rain poured relentlessly down upon their heads.
------------------------
From the underground cave, the dire message resonated throughout the kingdom-wide intercom and poured into the hearts of the three friends in hiding. Luigi, Daisy and Yoshi huddled together, dismayed from the deplorable news.
“Oh no…! Did you guys hear that…?” Yoshi sadly cried.
“…Oh…Peach…!” Daisy grieved, “…This cannot be happening…” She buried her saddened face miserably in her hands. Luigi held her close in his arms and kissed her head, gently rocking her.
“…This is the end…” he quavered, “The Mushroom Kingdom is gone… There’s now no hope…”
Edited by - Sapphira on 4/30/2003 11:03:04 AM
Post by: Fifth on April 30, 2003, 01:17:00 PM
I was hesitant to read this (I don't normally care much for fanfics,) but I'm glad that I finally got around to doing so.
You pulled off the premise and the effect quite wonderfully, and I was moved. Truly.
...Dag. That's the problem with reading in backlog. You get accustomed to reading straight through, and then you get to the end and realize that you have to start waiting.
So... here's waiting for the next part.
Go Moon!
Post by: Bluto on April 30, 2003, 08:13:00 PM
Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Post by: Insane Steve on April 30, 2003, 08:21:00 PM
Although I am still not saying my predictions... unless they're right.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Sapphira on April 30, 2003, 08:28:00 PM
I love doing this sort of thing; everyone hates the antagonist (Bowser, obviously), yet can't help but feel sympathy for him. 2 contradicting emotions at once.
Anyway, don't worry, my loyal fans! Tomorrow Chapter 12, the final chapter in Part 1, shall be posted. ^_^
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Sapphira on May 01, 2003, 07:41:00 AM
Chapter 12: Touch of Hope
---------------------------
Thunder continued to crackle throughout the dreary sky as the two disheartened heroes sat on the wet pavement, weeping in sorrow. A small, faint light flickered in the sky. It flew over to them, the plumber and Mushroom Retainer now drenched from the rain.
“Mario…!” Twink shouted through the loud thunderstorm. The two looked up, squinting from the pouring rain. “I’ve been looking all over for you…” He paused. “You’ve…heard, haven’t you…?”
“Hi, Twink…” Mario replied glumly. The storm began to lighten a bit.
Twink looked at the ground. “I…um…I have a message from the Princess…”
Mario stared at him. “…What do you mean…?” he asked slowly, “She…”
“Shortly before she…..” the little Star interrupted, “Uh…she told me to find you and tell you this…” Mario looked directly into Twink, his eyes searching the little Star. “She said that…she loves you…and she’ll never forget you…” Mario painfully closed his eyes, placing a hand over his mouth to keep from sobbing.
“She said that it’s not your fault,” Twink continued, “and there was nothing that you could have done…” His whole body began to shudder from the immense agony.
“Then she said to never give up hope, and that the prophecy you had told her has been fulfilled…”
Finally he could no longer contain the immeasurable amount of sorrow enveloping his soul as tears streamed down his face. “…Princess…! My beautiful princess…!” His heart ached with misery.
Toad sadly looked at Twink, slightly puzzled. “What prophecy…?”
“I’m not sure I know it very well…” he slowly replied, “Mario, you probably know it better than me. Would you be able to tell us…?” he asked kindly. Mario made himself calm back down again, wiping away his tears.
“…Um…well… A few days before Peach…” he pressed painfully, his eyes welling up again, “…was kidnapped, Merlon told me of a strange dream he had…” Mario tried hard to clear his mind. “He said…um…a voice told him this: that ‘a child of Good and Evil will come…’ Uh…that ‘Good will perish and Evil will reign…’ Um…uh…” He forced himself to focus. “Oh, and that ‘the child will destroy the Evil and Good will prevail again…” Mario looked up. “…But neither of us knew what it meant…”
Twink pursed his lips. “Peach told me that her daughter was this child…”
The thought absorbed into Mario’s mind. “…Wait a minute… So that means… Peach represents ‘Good’ and Bowser represents ‘Evil’…” His mind was whirling a mile a minute.
Toad thought for a moment. “Wait…‘Evil will reign…’ So, wait, Bowser’s already conquered most of the Mushroom World…so…I guess ‘Evil’ *is* Bowser…” he slowly stated.
Mario gasped, “…Oh no…‘Good will perish’… Peach is ‘Good,’ and she…she…” Unable to force the painful words, he closed his eyes in agony.
“I think we’ve figured it out…” the little Star whispered, “But… What does it mean by the last part…uh…‘the child will destroy the Evil and Good will prevail once more’…? If you replace ‘child’, ‘Good’ and ‘Evil’ for their names…it just doesn’t make sense…” He shook his head in perplexity.
“Maybe we’re interpreting it wrong…” Toad suggested.
“Maybe… But this ‘child’ *has* to be her daughter… Who else has been born of one truly good and one truly evil…?”
Toad thought hard. “But…maybe we’re looking into it too much… Could ‘Good’ and ‘Evil’ possibly mean our two kingdoms…?”
“Wait…maybe…” Twink paused in thought. “This child is born of the rulers of each of the two kingdoms…”
Mario looked up once again, “What about that ‘Good will perish’ part…?” He paused slowly. “I mean …Peach…she…” he trailed off sadly.
“But then how can ‘Good’ ‘prevail once more’…?”
“…Ooh… This is so confusing…!” The Mushroom Retainer lamented, “By the time we figure it out, it’ll have already happened…”
They all sighed dejectedly and picked themselves off the cold, wet ground. It had stopped raining a while ago. Twink sadly waved goodbye as the two heroes glumly walked back to the Mushroom Kingdom, their voices silent.
------------------------
Mario and Toad used the underground piping system to travel back home. Luigi, Yoshi and Daisy had dug a tunnel through their cave wall and found their way into the Toad Town Tunnels. Eventually the five of them unsuspectingly found each other, and it was a happy reunion. None of them had heard from the other since the terrible day the Mushroom Kingdom was captured. Glad as they were to see each other again, there was a silent aura of sadness felt from within each heart. All of the turmoil, deaths, destruction…. There was no way to hide its impact.
And then there was Peach. She was their closest friend. Nothing would ever be the same without her in their lives.
Together, they helped comfort one another, driving each other on. They would make it through this—together.
Mario and Toad were overjoyed in learning of Luigi and Daisy’s engagement. They made their way back to the small cave, which was a little crowded with five people. They huddled together, trying to find a way of continuing on with their lives amidst the unlikely odds of survival.
Eventually through the long, hard months, the special day had come. It wasn’t very fancy, nor was anyone really dressed for the occasion, but it had to do.
The five gathered for the small wedding, the bride and groom each accepting with all of their hearts. Luigi and Daisy slowly leaned toward each other as their lips tenderly met. The others quietly cheered as they watched the joyous scene. They were now married. Nothing could ever break their two souls apart.
Together, they all waited in silence, wondering what was to come in their bleak, dark days that lay ahead.
Post by: Bluto on May 01, 2003, 01:27:00 PM
Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Post by: Sapphira on May 01, 2003, 03:26:00 PM
The story SHALL continue, but updates will be random and sporatic. Glad you're all enjoying! (Man, I bet I'm torturing you by leaving it hanging like this!) ;)
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Insane Steve on May 02, 2003, 11:15:00 AM
And you said you added Part 2 after originally writing the story? I'd like to see if the style from the new part is any different than the styles of the pre-written parts... it ought to be interesting.
Still, Part 1 was excellent. Amazing. Better than I'll ever be.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Jman on May 03, 2003, 08:24:00 PM
Long live the Mario Brothers!
Edited by - Jman on 5/3/2003 7:29:08 PM
Post by: Jman on May 04, 2003, 01:38:00 PM
Long live the Mario Brothers!
Post by: Sapphira on May 04, 2003, 11:08:00 PM
Anyhoo, I mentioned that once I posted all of Part 1, I'd tell what the changes were in CH 10+, so here ya go.
Originally, when Mario and Toad are close to the castle (and Mario gets that massive headache), he feels Peach die on him. So Mario never got to see her one last time to say goodbye.
I felt, though, that since Peach was hanging on for Mario to come, they should get to see each other one last time. If she died before he came, then her holding out would've been pointless.
Plus, the good-bye makes it more emotionally compelling--at least I thought so.
Well, as I said, I'm glad from all your positive feedback and will continue the story as promised. :)
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If things don't go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Edited by - Sapphira on 5/5/2003 2:46:21 PM
Post by: Jman on May 05, 2003, 03:41:00 PM
Long live the Mario Brothers!
Post by: Sapphira on May 15, 2003, 08:39:00 PM
Sorry. I know you're all waiting...
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If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Sapphira on May 16, 2003, 06:25:00 PM
-Part 2: Tribulation-
Chapter 13: Midnight Venture
----------------------------
The rest of the hard year had slowly passed. The young child Melony had trouble sleeping every night since the gloomy afternoon her mother had passed away. Disturbing visions and horrifying images haunted her dreams. She was terrified to sleep for fear these nightmares would come true or even that she would never wake up again. Every night she prayed they would stop, and holding her Yoshi doll close, she managed to cry herself to sleep. There was something about that doll’s eyes that made it so friendly and comforting, so different from everyone and thing in that dreary castle of her home. She longed to know what peace felt like. And she was only five years old.
------------------------
Eventually the five friends slowly found their way to Princess Peach’s Castle. How terrible it was—crumbling, eroded, misshapen; it was almost in ruins. The inside, though, was in much better condition; in fact, most of the many rooms were still in decent shape, except for those on the topmost floors, which had completely collapsed and were now demolished.
The five set a plan: they would search for other hiding inhabitants and provide help and refuge for them in the castle. Already they had been successful, and everyone was extremely grateful, joining in to help in the search. Eventually, though, suspicion began to arise from some in the Koopa Troop. Luckily, they seemed to be safe for the time being.
Mario began to grow weary. Late one evening he announced that he had to go somewhere. The others wondered what he was planning on doing as he headed for the castle's doors, taking a Cape Feather from his pocket. Luigi stopped him; he didn’t like this one bit.
“Mario, what exactly are you doing?” he asked concernedly.
Mario turned around to face him, slightly flustered. “Look, I’ll be back, all right?”
He frowned. “Mario, come on; we’re brothers. Tell me what’s going on.”
“Since *when* do I have to answer to *you*?!” he snapped. Luigi stared at him, shocked. “Look, it doesn’t concern you. I’ll be back, all right?”
“Mario…” The door closed in his face. Mario shook his head frustratingly and flew away into the distance.
Luigi sighed and glumly turned around. Daisy slowly descended the stairs, pausing with a puzzled expression on her delicate face.
“What was that all about?” she asked.
Luigi sighed. “I dunno. Something’s up with him.” Daisy walked the rest of the way down.
“Is he all right?”
“Well, he said he’d be back…”
Compassionately she placed a hand on his slumped shoulder. “Then I wouldn’t worry about it. He knows how to take care of himself.”
“You're right,” he sighed.
Daisy pursed her lips. “Come on; it’s getting late.” Silently the two headed back up the velvet stairs.
------------------------
Luigi awoke from his sleep. Rolling himself over, he glanced at the clock. 12:03. He looked over to his wife; she was sound asleep, her breathing faint and peaceful, filled with an aura of tranquility.
Carefully in the dark he forced himself up and silently dressed into his classic overalls and green shirt, topped off with his signature ‘L’ cap. He walked over to the sleeping Daisy and lightly kissed her fragile cheek. She stirred a little then gently rolled over, sighing deeply in her dreams. For a moment he felt he could gaze at her forever. She was so beautiful, so loving, so innocent. Her face defined the very essence of grace and serenity.
Luigi stood up and quietly exited the bedroom. He pursed his lips.
“Don’t worry…I’ll be back,” he whispered, “Sleep well, my love…”
Slowly he closed the door and walked down the hallway and stairs, careful to make sure he wouldn’t wake anyone. He opened the immense, wobbly castle doors with a creak. Closing them behind him, he pulled a Cape Feather from his pocket. Luigi shook his head.
*Here goes nothing…* he thought. Slowly he flew up into the midnight sky. He had to find Mario—before the night was over, before he did anything stupid.
------------------------
The head Royal Mushroom Retainer awoke, tossing from his dreams. He had been having trouble sleeping lately. Still a bit drowsy, he quietly crept down the stairs and walked into the dimly-lit kitchen. He noticed Yoshi sitting at the island counter, staring off into space, playing with an untouched cookie.
“Hey, Yoshi,” he said languidly.
Yoshi looked up. “Hey,” he said, “Couldn’t sleep?”
“Naw. You neither?”
Yoshi sighed and shook his head. “Wanna cookie?” he asked.
“No thanks.” Toad pulled up a stool, numbly staring at the yellow wall. After several minutes he broke the silence. “Hey, since neither of us can sleep, do you wanna do something? I’ve got some cards, if you want to play.”
“Sure.”
------------------------
Mario sat on the rooftop of a house, staring at Bowser’s immense, dark Castle before his eyes. His chin rested in his hand, a forlorn, agonizing expression shrouding his face. Suddenly he stood up and shouted fiercely at the top of his lungs.
“How could you do this to her!!?” he screamed, “How dare you!! I promise you, you WILL pay!! I WILL avenge her, if it’s the last thing I do!!” Mario collapsed to his knees, burying his face in his hands. “Oh…Peach… How could I let this happen to you…?” He felt a slight breeze brush against his back. A figure flew from behind and landed on the rooftop.
“Mario,” it whispered. The agitated plumber slowly lifted his head. It was Luigi. Quickly he turned away, tightly closing his sapphire eyes. “Mario…” he solemnly pressed, “I thought I’d find you here…”
Mario clenched his teeth, still facing away. “Why did you follow me? I told you this doesn’t concern you!”
“Look, I didn’t come here to debate this…” He sighed painfully. “Look…I’m worried about you. Everyone’s worried about you… Come on; what’s going on…?”
Mario numbly stared at a small balcony protruding from the dark castle’s portentous exterior wall. “Here, right here…” he whispered, “This is the last place I saw her…”
“Mario…”
“I can’t…!” Agonizingly he closed his eyes.
“Mario…please…”
“She died in my arms, Luigi…”
He stopped. “What…?” Mario shook his head forlornly. Luigi pursed his lips. “Mario… Tell me… Why are you here…?”
“I have to kill him…! I have to…!”
“Kill *Bowser*?!” Luigi gasped, “Are you completely out of your mind?!”
“She’s gone because of him! If it weren’t for him, she’d still be alive today…!”
Luigi’s heart ached. He spoke softly. “Mario… I know you loved her… I know you’ll never be the same… I understand; she was the greatest friend…to me, to everyone. But some things…you just have to let go…”
Mario was fuming. “Let go!? LET GO!? How could I *possibly* let go!!? How could you possibly understand how I feel!? How would *you* feel if, say, something happened to Daisy!? Would *you* just be able to ‘let it go’?!”
“Mario…I…”
“She meant the world to me…! I’d die for her…! I’d kill for her…! Which is why I have to do this…” Mario angrily spun away. Quickly his overwhelmed brother grabbed his shoulder, forcing him to face him.
“Mario, listen to me! Don’t do this! I’m begging you! …Peach is gone…! There’s *nothing* you can do to change that…”
Mario forcefully pushed his hand away. “I thought you said you understood…!” he fiercely retorted.
“I do! But, Mario, you’ve lost it. You’re not thinking straight anymore. I’m saying this because, believe it or not, I care about you.” Mario looked away. “Bowser has become way too powerful. Troops would be on you like *that* before you could get anywhere near to him. Mario, there’s no way you’d be able to make it. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I’ve done it before!” he shouted vehemently, “What makes you think I can’t do it again?!”
Luigi sighed desolately. “Mario, there’s way more of them than there’s ever been before. And, besides, you were thinking clearly and rationally each time. Mario…that’s all beside the point. You *know* murder is wrong, even though he is your mortal enemy. I know in your heart you could never bring yourself to do it… That’s why you never have, despite the many opportunities…”
“This has nothing to do with morality!” he screamed, “This is about justice! He deserves to die, Luigi! You can’t tell me he doesn’t!”
“Mario...don’t do this…”
The red-clad plumber painfully closed his eyes, his teeth clenched so tightly his jaw ached. “Please…! Just go…”
Luigi sadly realized he couldn’t force his brother to change his mind. He turned away dejectedly. “I won’t stop you…but, please…just do the right thing…”
Mario continued to painfully look away. Sighing heavily, Luigi slowly flew away, hoping that somehow his words would get through to his overwrought brother.
Edited by - Sapphira on 5/16/2003 6:36:39 PM
Post by: Maestro on May 16, 2003, 11:03:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on May 16, 2003, 11:13:00 PM
(Oh yeah, I LOVE the Left Behind series. You may actually catch an allusion or two...(sooner or later, anyway.) The rest is solid originality. ...Hmm...although it *IS* rather apocalyptic and prophesaic... (wait, that's not a word!))
--------------------
If things don’t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Marionut#1 on May 17, 2003, 04:52:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on May 17, 2003, 04:59:00 PM
...That was me, speechless!
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If things don’t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Bluto on May 17, 2003, 10:22:00 PM
... and I am still the #1 fan of this story.^_^
Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Post by: Chupperson Weird on May 17, 2003, 10:28:00 PM
Well, I read all of what I hadn't so far, and, while unbelieveably repulsive, I still like the story.
Post by: Marionut#1 on May 17, 2003, 11:08:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Dairy King on May 18, 2003, 03:15:00 AM
U.S. X-Box Controller- Doubles as an anchor for sea-worthy crafts.
Post by: Sapphira on May 18, 2003, 12:29:00 PM
--------------------
If things don’t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Post by: Marionut#1 on May 18, 2003, 02:05:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Insane Steve on May 18, 2003, 07:54:00 PM
And I almost can't tell that you added this part well after you finished the story. You have a real flair for writing. Nicely done. Interesting how you take Mario and give him a radically different mood than is customary for him.
It's still a 10 in my book.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Jman on May 19, 2003, 04:10:00 PM
this is, in the words of more than one member on this board, "the best fanfic I've ever read!"
"You said you understood!"
" Yes, but you've lost it Mario!"
*Mario and Luigi from "The Prophecy"
Hey, I should make that my new sig!
Long live the Mario Brothers!
Post by: Dr. Mario on May 19, 2003, 07:04:00 PM
Ch. 1 first sentence.
"*And a child of Good and Evil shall come to rise. Good will perish and Evil will reign, but the child will destroy the Evil, and Good will prevail once more.*”
BTW, this story is an 11 out of 10 in my book!
What is wrong with this guy?
...Besides everything!
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 5/19/2003 6:07:23 PM
Post by: Jman on May 19, 2003, 07:12:00 PM
I think these words are my favorite in the entire story.
"You said you understood!"
"Yes, but you've lost it Mario!"
new sig approaches:
"You can''t kill a real American hero, you rube!
--Zok the Alien, my original character.
Edited by - Jman on 5/19/2003 6:18:23 PM
Post by: Sapphira on May 19, 2003, 07:15:00 PM
Oh, and as I think Steve mentioned earlier, "Most other stories I can sorta figure out what's going to happen next, but I don't even know HOW you'd continue this!" --paraphrased as best I can remember. Anyhoo, this story is completely unpredictable, so it'll leave you guessing on what's gonna happen next. Nevertheless, I love hearing your predictions. :)
Oh, and I also said I added Part 2 (CH 13 thru ??) long after the story was completed, if that tells you anything. :)
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on May 19, 2003, 07:20:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on May 19, 2003, 07:22:00 PM
Oh, but one thing; it goes:
"I thought you said you understood…!"
"I do! But, Mario, you’ve lost it."
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Sapphira on May 19, 2003, 07:24:00 PM
100th post in my story!! Woohoo!!
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on May 19, 2003, 07:42:00 PM
"I thought you said you understood...!"
"I do! But, Mario you've lost it!"
- Mario and Luigi from The Prophecy.
"You can''t kill a real American hero, you rube!
--Zok the Alien, my original character.
Edited by - Jman on 5/19/2003 6:46:39 PM
Post by: Sapphira on May 19, 2003, 08:17:00 PM
You got the 100th *REPLY*.
There's a difference. The very 1st post actually counts as 0. Hence why we live in the 21st century even though it's the century 2000.
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on May 19, 2003, 08:34:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Sapphira on May 19, 2003, 08:52:00 PM
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Mario Maniac on May 21, 2003, 08:28:00 AM
People who like video games should also like Nintendo. People who don''t like Nintendo obviously don''t like video games.
Post by: Sapphira on May 21, 2003, 10:39:00 AM
Once again, I'm speechless! Thank you so much! Oh, and you spelled exquisite correctly. :)
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on May 21, 2003, 08:29:00 PM
"You can''t kill a real American hero, you rube!
--Zok the Alien, my original character.
Post by: Sapphira on May 21, 2003, 09:12:00 PM
^_^ Man, that would be so awesome!
(To be honest, that would be an amazing dream come true! I've actually thought about what it would be like if this were to become a movie! (Just a crazy, random dream floating in the back of my mind)...Of course, I'd have to direct it or oversee it or something to make sure Hollywood (or whoever) didn't alter it too much. Gah! Remakes of novels just change them too much.)
Oh, on a side note, if they ever decided to make another Mario movie again, it'd HAVE to be in 3-D animation, just like the VGs are. Definitely NOT real life *cough* SMB:tM *cough*, and cartoon format just doesn't seem like it'd fit the modern Mario style anymore. (...I've wanted to make a comment about Mario movie changes/suggestions for a long time, completely unrelated to this story, of course.) :)
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Mario Maniac on May 28, 2003, 08:52:00 AM
Post by: Sapphira on May 28, 2003, 12:33:00 PM
Chapters 1-9 were already 100% ready to go before I posted them, and 10-12 (the rest of Part 1) just needed some alterations. The rest of the story TOTALLY needs to be edited and revised. Takes about 2 weeks per chapter now.
I know that's a long time, but you want it to be the best it can, right? Please be patient. :)
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Sapphira on May 28, 2003, 06:00:00 PM
I actually JUST finished CH 14! ...Although I divided it into 2 chapters, which I wasn't planning to do. It was longer in length than I thought it was, that's why. If it weren't for that, it would've been a while longer.
Anyhoo, enjoy! ;) ...The second chapter of Part 2...
Chapter 14: Inquietude
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It was dark. Shadows enveloped the young Melony everywhere. Unable to see, her big blue eyes squinted in the darkness. Suddenly a loud blood-curdling scream echoed throughout the void. It shrieked for help.
“No…! No…please…! Noo…!!!”
There was a sharp metallic slice. Silence. A deep, heinous voice laughed menacingly. More screams came. Hundreds. Thousands. More sounds of slicing. Melony stood in the darkness, frozen with terror.
“Run…” she heard something whisper. With of all her small strength, she fled away from the horrid screams and sounds, her little heart pounding from within her chest. Suddenly something grabbed her from behind. She tried to scream, but nothing came out. Her eyes widened in sheer terror as she watched a sharp dagger plunge to her throat…
Melony awoke with a gasp. Sweat beaded her forehead, her breathing in short, shaky gasps. She felt her throat. Nothing. It was fine.
It was a dream, just a dream.
Slowly Melony sat up, careful not to wake her sister in the bunk above. Shakily she walked over and climbed onto the wind sill. Holding her Yoshi doll close, she gazed up at the many stars in the twilight sky. She curled herself into a ball and cried softly.
------------------------
Luigi flew silently through the night sky. How he hoped Mario would listen to him. Sighing heavily, he glanced at his watch. 3:37. He had to get back soon.
Peach’s Castle soon came into view. Their haven looked so eroded and terrible. It was startling to think that nearly fifty refugees, including him, could safely survive there. But how long would it last…?
Luigi shuddered, suppressing the horrid thought. Nearing the crumbling, yet still solid doors, he prepared to land. Suddenly he gasped. Three Koopatrols were loitering aimlessly around the side of the castle. Quickly he tried to avoid them, but it was too late; they had already seen him.
“What’s that?!” one of them shouted.
“It’s a person, you idiot! Get him!”
Luigi cringed. Immediately the three rushed toward him. Thinking quickly, he kicked them in the faces as he landed, causing them to topple to the ground in an almost comical fashion.
They recovered quickly, though. Two of the guards fiercely grabbed him, pinning him back as the other repeatedly gave blows to his stomach and face. Luigi struggled to reach his left pocket while defending himself. Suddenly he pulled out a Fire Flower and stunned the aggressor. Throwing the other two off guard, he quickly spun around and bashed their scaly heads together.
Luigi panted heavily, inspecting the unconscious Koopas. The others would have been proud of him. Shaking from the unexpected melee, he glanced at the castle’s main doors. More troops stood outside. Luigi cringed. He would have to find another way inside.
------------------------
Daisy awoke from her sleep, startled. She had heard a loud thud from outside below.
“What was that…?!” she whispered frightfully. She brusquely attuned her ears. Suddenly a loud shattering of glass echoed from outside. Daisy gasped in horror. “Oh my gosh…! Luigi, get up…! There’s someone outside…!” She heard no response. “Luigi…?” The princess quickly looked over to his side of the bed. But he was not there.
------------------------
Mario continued to sit on the rooftop, staring at Bowser’s monstrous Castle before his eyes. How torn apart he was—angry and heartbroken, stewing over what to do next. Suddenly he stood up; his face was fuming.
“Ughhh! If *I* can’t kill you, your precious child *will*! The prophecy! Listen to the prophecy! She WILL be avenged! You WILL be destroyed!”
The overwhelming rage abruptly transformed into a cold, bitter misery. He stared hopelessly at the ground below, tightly closing his eyes. Something gently floated down from the sky and landed softly near him on the rooftop. From the corner of his eye, Mario saw it land. The little Star Twink watched him silently from above.
Slowly Mario picked it up; it was an envelope. On the front was his name, beautifully scripted. He recognized this handwriting from somewhere. Carefully he opened the envelope, gently pulling out what appeared to be a letter. His eyes carefully landed upon the words.
“My dearest Mario,” He immediately tore his eyes from the stationery. It was from Peach. The terrible wounds from the dagger mercilessly ripped open once again, his heart flooding with the unbearable, painful memory. He clenched his teeth and swallowed hard.
This was too much to bear. How could he possibly read this? He shook his head in agony. He *had* to read this. Slowly he forced his eyes to meet the calligraphic words.
*I love you with all my heart. Please don’t ever think that I would not. I know you tried your very best and hardest to save me, but it is already too late. Please, please, *please* don’t go blaming yourself or anyone else. There was *nothing* that could have been done; it was inevitable.*
Mario fought back bitter sobs, choking on the terrible lump in his throat. His vision grew blurry, the words fading in and out, but he forced himself to continue.
*I have little energy left, so I will write sparingly. Please… Pray for my daughter, that she will not fall into the evil ways of the Koopas. I only hope that she will become wise and brave and strong, just as you are, my love. Please keep me dear in your heart. Please hold on without me. You must stay strong in these dark times. Don’t ever, ever lose hope. I only wish I could see you and hold you and be able to kiss you one last time. Don’t you ever give up, my love. I love you so, so much; I always will.
*Truly only yours forever,
*Peach*
Painfully Mario closed his eyes. He struggled with his utmost being to suppress the overwhelming agony welling within his soul. The hero held the letter close against his chest, forcing back tears. Softly he kissed the frail stationery, the very scent of it reminding him of his sweet princess. Very gently, he folded it and placed it back into its envelope, as if it were a flower whose fragile beauty would wither in his hands. He carefully placed it into his pocket, where it would remain safe against him.
Slowly he looked up at the dreary castle. His sharp blue eyes were terribly clouded over, seeming that his very essence had withered into a numb void of nonexistence. Sighing hopelessly, he turned away and flew off of the rooftop, far away from the castle into the starry night sky. Twink gave a weary smile and sullenly flew away, also, silent, unseen.
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Insane Steve on May 28, 2003, 08:04:00 PM
Oh man, that's gold. I mean, nice to see that even in such a serious story, you can pull off sporatic humor and still make it work. Opposed to me, of course, who has to compromise that "serious" feel to add humor. Of course, without humor, my style is... dull, actually.
Still, amazing.
...
Too long? I think all of my story's chapters were longer than that.... still, amazing. I am still astonished by your flawless presentation.
And speaking of my (new) story... I can't do ANYTHING with it after Part 1 ends (5 Chapters). Bleh. I'll figure something out.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Chupperson Weird on May 28, 2003, 08:34:00 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on May 28, 2003, 08:40:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Maestro on May 29, 2003, 09:48:00 PM
Post by: Jman on May 30, 2003, 10:26:00 AM
Speaking of fanfics, I just posted a new Mario fic called "The Mushroom Kingdom Conquest."
"You can''t kill a real American hero, you rube!
--Zok the Alien, my original character.
Edited by - Jman on 5/30/2003 12:29:49 PM
Post by: Dr. Mario on May 30, 2003, 03:07:00 PM
BTW love the humor, It's a person you idiot! Get him!"
What is wrong with this guy?
...Besides everything!
Post by: Jman on May 30, 2003, 03:40:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on May 30, 2003, 11:08:00 PM
Heheh... You guys really liked that line, huh? Every once in a while, I'll throw in some humor (in future chapters). Very sporatic, though. :)
Thanks, guys, for all your support. I can't believe how much you all like it! ^_^
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on May 31, 2003, 09:14:00 AM
Post by: Sapphira on May 31, 2003, 12:21:00 PM
"Takes about 2 weeks per chapter now.
I know that's a long time, but you want it to be the best it can, right? Please be patient. :)"
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Bluto on June 03, 2003, 04:14:00 PM
Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Post by: jon on June 05, 2003, 05:58:00 PM
________________________________________
Luigi can't cook spagetti according to Mario.
Post by: jon on June 05, 2003, 09:07:00 PM
I'm just kidding.
Post by: jon on June 07, 2003, 12:08:00 PM
Good job.
I think the only problem with selling it to the market is that this is like an adult book and there aren't many adults out there who like Mario-except Luigison. But if anyone wants a great book, they should still check this out!^_^
Post by: Marionut#1 on June 07, 2003, 12:19:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: jon on June 07, 2003, 12:41:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on June 07, 2003, 12:57:00 PM
Actually, that's something I want to do! ^_^ Work for Nintendo, that is. :)
I don't think this story would make a very good video game. A *movie* on the other hand... ;)
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: jon on June 07, 2003, 01:01:00 PM
My story would be up as a cartoon movie because it has a lot of comedy in it.
I think with your story, it would be better if people acted it out because there would be special effects/computer graphics and it will just perfectify(is that a word?) a movie-story.
Post by: Sapphira on June 07, 2003, 01:05:00 PM
And, no, "perfectify" is not a word. It's "perfect," as in "per-FECT" not "PER-fect."
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: jon on June 07, 2003, 01:08:00 PM
Oh, another way to spell 'perfect' is purr-fect. Ha ha-I'm so dumb. Just kidding. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Bowser evil laugh. Ha!
Post by: Jman on June 19, 2003, 12:06:00 PM
Post by: Dairy King on June 19, 2003, 03:12:00 PM
Wow.....
Wow.....
Either way, I''m still a cad! I hate everybody! Yaaarrrgh!
-Wario
Post by: Sapphira on July 06, 2003, 08:37:00 PM
*Sigh*
Well, on another note, I put this story up on Fanfiction.net... It's been up for 2 days (well, 24 hours, technically, but over the span of two days--and updated once since I put it up) and no one's made a review...*sniffle*
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on July 08, 2003, 08:37:00 AM
The master of multiplayer Mario games: You''re looking at him right now!
Post by: Sapphira on July 08, 2003, 10:04:00 AM
Anyway, thanks for reviewing it. ^_^
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Insane Steve on July 08, 2003, 04:22:00 PM
And I'm NEVER going to Fanfiction.net. I some something on this site about a year ago from there that made me all sick inside and stuff. And that's hard to do, man. So ya.
Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.
Post by: Mario Maniac on July 21, 2003, 09:24:00 AM
People who like video games should also like Nintendo. People who don''t like Nintendo obviously don''t like video games.
Post by: Jman on July 21, 2003, 11:27:00 AM
The master of multiplayer Mario games: You''re looking at him right now!
Post by: Dr. Mario on July 21, 2003, 12:29:00 PM
Post by: Markio on July 21, 2003, 12:51:00 PM
Act your age, not your I.Q. Wait, what''s the difference?
Post by: Sapphira on July 21, 2003, 12:51:00 PM
I'll try to finish the next chapter soon, really. I know you're all waiting... *smiles, cringing...*
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Sapphira on July 21, 2003, 01:57:00 PM
Anyway, thanks, Markio. I'm glad you like it. :)
Post by: jon on July 21, 2003, 03:58:00 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants!
Post by: Sapphira on July 21, 2003, 06:02:00 PM
It's my story, and what I wish to do with it is my own choice. ;P
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Edited by - Sapphira on 7/21/2003 5:03:10 PM
Post by: Dairy King on July 21, 2003, 06:20:00 PM
*Please Post Next Chapter Soon!*
Post by: Dr. Mario on July 22, 2003, 08:41:00 AM
900th post!!!! Words of Wisdom: Enemies are just friends in reverse.
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 7/22/2003 7:45:13 AM
Post by: Jman on July 23, 2003, 09:45:00 AM
The master of multiplayer Mario games: You''re looking at him right now!
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 10:16:00 AM
lol, Jman. That line was actually added JUST right before I posted it. I didn't want to make Daisy seem like a crybaby; she doesn't strike me to be that way. Plus, subtle humor never hurts... ;P
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on July 23, 2003, 11:21:00 AM
I really need to think up a subtle humor line for my sig.
I go through signatures like a fat guy goes through pants in a week.
Post by: Sapphira on July 23, 2003, 11:56:00 AM
Oh, and you're new sig's fine. I like it. ;)
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Markio on July 26, 2003, 09:41:00 AM
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 06:39:00 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 06:48:00 AM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: Markio on July 27, 2003, 10:19:00 AM
Hamster Sauce!
Edited by - Markio on 7/27/2003 9:20:50 AM
Post by: Dairy King on July 27, 2003, 10:31:00 AM
Marionut#1, who in all from tMK appears in your story?
Rest assured. There is no signature. There never has been, and never will be.
Edited by - Dairy King on 7/27/2003 9:34:45 AM
Post by: Sapphira on July 27, 2003, 11:59:00 AM
I actually appreciate the fact that you all keep telling me to finish the story; it shows me how much you really like it. ^_^ ...Just try not to pester me *too* much about it... XD
I haven't forgotten about it; I just haven't really found the time to get to it. I'll get to it eventually, don't worry. Just try to be patient... XD
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Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on July 27, 2003, 12:32:00 PM
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 7/27/2003 4:15:23 PM
Post by: Maestro on July 27, 2003, 10:47:00 PM
Post by: Insane Steve on July 28, 2003, 09:18:00 AM
Still... whenever you have time, continue. Until then, resume ... whatever you needed to do.
If you have any questions on any Mario game for the GameCube, any at all, please keep them AS FAR AWAY from me as possible. I don`t want to look like a total idiot in front of the whole forum. Thanks in advance.
Post by: Dr. Mario on July 28, 2003, 11:44:00 AM
Post by: Markio on August 03, 2003, 06:56:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: Sapphira on August 03, 2003, 07:04:00 PM
Post by: Markio on August 03, 2003, 07:54:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: Dr. Mario on August 04, 2003, 01:38:00 PM
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 06, 2003, 02:02:00 AM
BWAHAHAHA...sorry...I seem a little bit protective because I did have a crush on Sapph...bah..I think Ive finally got over it..
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Post by: on August 07, 2003, 01:20:00 PM
" I think therefore I am.... I think...."
Post by: Sapphira on August 07, 2003, 01:33:00 PM
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Jman on August 07, 2003, 06:59:00 PM
Proud to be an American!
Post by: on August 07, 2003, 07:32:00 PM
" I think therefore I am.... I think...."
Post by: Markio on August 09, 2003, 05:02:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Edited by - Markio on 8/9/2003 4:04:28 PM
Post by: Dr. Mario on August 09, 2003, 05:11:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on August 09, 2003, 05:14:00 PM
I have the complete manuscript of this story, as well as the next story I'm working on, in a binder. I also have a binder full of all my Nintendo drawings.
Both of them no one (in my house) knows about, and whenever I'm writing/drawing and someone knocks on the door, I, too, franically hide it. XD
In fact, the only people who know about this story are people via internet (you guys being the first.) I'm a secret author...hee hee hee... ;D
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Markio on August 09, 2003, 06:00:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: gunblade88 on August 10, 2003, 07:31:00 AM
Just so you know you have one more fan.
The penguins will take us all away!! So says Boss AKA: Tonfa
Post by: Sapphira on August 10, 2003, 12:14:00 PM
Post by: Some guy on August 11, 2003, 12:15:00 AM
Post by: Destiny Smasher on August 11, 2003, 10:53:00 AM
Anyway, from what I see it tingles my curiousity. However, here is a suggestion- mind you, ADVICE, not really a complaint.
But I noticed you tend to do something (at least at the start) that I always used to do in my fiction. You concentrate on what the characters say.
Hm...Do you think that perhaps you could add some detail? I mean, like how they're moving, their expressions, the sceneray, etc.? Just a thought. A man named Orgrim Doomhammer helped me realize what was barring me from reaching my full potential, and that was it. Ahem. Well, sorry if I sound mean, I really don't mean it. Perhaps I should read more when I can...
Carry on.
Post by: Sapphira on August 11, 2003, 02:21:00 PM
"Hm...Do you think that perhaps you could add some detail? I mean, like how they're moving, their expressions, the sceneray, etc.? "
--Keep on reading. You'll see what I mean... It'll get REALLY intense and descriptive in the later chapters of those I've posted...
Actually Part 1 mostly focuses on events, while Part 2 focuses on the implications...the trauma, emotions, suffering... As for Part 3 and 4...well...let's just wait and see what happens. ;P
Oh, and keep in mind that this story was written a year and a half ago (and was in play-like format). Most of Part 1 was edited and revised (into novel form) a year ago. The later Chapters in Part 1 were
revised only recently, and since that year ago, my writing style has improved. I believe Part 2 will be the most well written. ;)
Anyway, thanks for reading it, everybody! And, like I said, I like having feedback, whether good or bad. That way I know what I'm doing right and what needs improvement. ;)
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Edited by - Sapphira on 8/11/2003 1:24:29 PM
Post by: Jman on August 11, 2003, 02:49:00 PM
Proud to be an American!
Post by: Sapphira on August 11, 2003, 03:59:00 PM
Heheh...fast, huh? For a novel...
Well, actually Part 1, 3 & 4 were finished in 7 weeks. Part 2 was then added later, which I wrote sporadically throughout last summer.
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: gunblade88 on August 12, 2003, 06:16:00 PM
To deny our own impulses, is to deny the very thing that makes us human.
Post by: Sapphira on August 12, 2003, 07:33:00 PM
Not sure if that's the correct way, but that's how I pronounce it.
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Marionut#1 on August 12, 2003, 07:44:00 PM
SAF-er-uh
EDIT: Sorry...that was a typo...its ER not EAR...
It‘s-a me, Marionut#1!
Edited by - Marionut#1 on 8/13/2003 5:53:24 AM
Post by: jon on August 12, 2003, 08:45:00 PM
-----------------------------
Mariotendo-the Mario Side of Nintendo!
Post by: Destiny Smasher on August 13, 2003, 11:38:00 AM
Hm...I think I will actually make time to read some of this in the next couple of days...I HOPE.
Anyway, do you ever check your E-Mail, Sapphira? I sent you one the other day.
Post by: Sapphira on August 13, 2003, 02:04:00 PM
Oh, and I'd love to read your story...if I ever get the time... :(
I've heard that it's REALLY good. ;)
---
Oh, and I looked it up: Sapphira is pronounced "suh-FIE-ruh."
Meh, I like "suh-FEER-uh" the best; that's how I've always pronounced it and I think it sounds prettiest. ;P
...And I pronounce "Sapph" like you would "laugh"
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Edited by - Sapphira on 8/13/2003 1:37:15 PM
Post by: on August 13, 2003, 03:44:00 PM
" I think therefore I am.... I think...."
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:31:00 PM
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 8/14/2003 12:30:30 PM
Post by: Markio on August 13, 2003, 07:35:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:37:00 PM
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 8/14/2003 12:31:12 PM
Post by: Sapphira on August 13, 2003, 07:50:00 PM
--Yeah, well I don't care what you think. I like it. :(
"Sapp-FIRE" is Sapphire.
Notice that my name has an 'a' on the end, not an 'e'.--So it wouldn't be pronounced that way.
And, jon, stop spamming in my thread. It's bad enough that you've been doing it throughout the whole board, but DON'T DO IT IN MY THREADS!
It's NOT funny. It's NOT cute. It's retarded and, frankily, extemely annoying and immature. Don't push my buttons; I'm a mod, you know.
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: Markio on August 13, 2003, 07:52:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 07:57:00 PM
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 8/14/2003 12:31:56 PM
Post by: Sapphira on August 13, 2003, 07:59:00 PM
--------------------
Deep inside us all is a little green elf telling us to burn things.
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 08:00:00 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Markio on August 13, 2003, 08:03:00 PM
Hamster Sauce!
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 08:06:00 PM
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 8/14/2003 12:28:00 PM
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 08:48:00 PM
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 8/14/2003 12:27:22 PM
Post by: jon on August 13, 2003, 08:51:00 PM
Edited by - Dr. Mario on 8/14/2003 12:28:33 PM
Post by: gunblade88 on August 14, 2003, 05:22:00 PM
To deny our own impulses, is to deny the very thing that makes us human.
Post by: Markio on August 14, 2003, 06:09:00 PM
Hamster Sauce! Yay!
Post by: Destiny Smasher on August 15, 2003, 02:51:00 PM
AHEM! OK, now comes what I think of Chapters 1+2...
OH MY GAWD...
Wow...It's just...Well, no offense, like I said, it's missing something, but STILL...
It really has me drawn in.
You are the first person I have ever seen to do these things in a Mario fic (In ANY FIC, and I've read a LOT of them), and in the first two Chapters no less!
1.) Mario and Perach get engaged
2.) Everyone gets totally depressed when she's kidnapped. (WHOOO, big WHOOP. She ALWAYS gets kidnapped. I mean, I could understand if they somehow knew about 3.), but...)
3.) Peach gets RAPED- by BOWSER- nonetheless!! That stopped me DEAD- DEAD I tell you, and it takes a lot to stop me dead. You just...'She was raped.' What the heck? Then again, maybe leaving out detail was best for that...
4.) PREGNANT?! MY GAWD WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?! MAHAHA!! I LOVE it, yet I HATE it at the same time. It definiteley leaves me curious!
Oh, yea, and, well...The only truly annoying thing so far was how you described Bowser taking over the Mushroom Kingdom. Threee weeks later, Bowser had killed a ton of people, etc., etc. and for SOME reason, nobody seemed to do anything about it... Mario Bros., WINK WINK!)
AHEM! But, other than that, it's fairly good so far.
Oh, yea, and...Could you please check your mail...? I'm positive I mailed you SOMETHING...Well, when you can.
~*~*~*~*~*
Your World, my World...What''''s the difference? There is none. Our worlds are all connected by the same sky...The same Destiny...It''''''''s beginning...A War...But when the time comes, whose side will you be on? And whose side will Fate favor?
Only time will tell...Time is of the essence...Your Quest for Destiny is underway, my friend...But will you find the path that suits you within the chaos of War...?
Edited by - Destiny Smasher on 8/15/2003 1:53:22 PM
Post by: gunblade88 on August 15, 2003, 05:21:00 PM
If winners never quit, and quitters never win, who made the saying "Quit while you''re still ahead"?
Post by: Sapphira on August 15, 2003, 05:29:00 PM
"Yeah, I got your email. ;)
"Oh, and I'd love to read your story...if I ever get the time... :(
"I've heard that it's REALLY good. ;) "
--------------------
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools, because they have to say something.
Post by: Jman on August 15, 2003, 06:07:00 PM
Proud to be an American!
Post by: Maestro on August 15, 2003, 11:39:00 PM
In my Bible, it says it is pronounced Saff-I-ra much like Sapphire. This is also the way I said it in my mind as I read it. And I would venture to say that the reference in the Bible is correct due to the fact it is probably the first documented use of the name.
Post by: Destiny Smasher on August 16, 2003, 09:47:00 AM
Who'd you hear that it was good from? Nobody on these forums seems to read it, I don't think...I mean, this sure as heck isn't the only forum it's on, but...Yes, every single person who has ever replied/reviewed loves it, except one case- and he DID like it, then he became a stubborn jerk and started hating ALL fanfics, so...He doesn't really count.
Meh, anyway, I would love it if you got time...sometime. ? Yea, exactly. Well, hopefully tonight I will read Chapter 3- maybe Chapter 4, too, depending on how long they are...
~*~*~*~*~*
Your World, my World...What''s the difference? There is none. Our worlds are all connected by the same sky...The same Destiny...It''s beginning...A War...But when the time comes, whose side will you be on? And whose side will Fate favor?
Only time will tell...Time is of the essence...Your Quest for Destiny is underway, my friend...But will you find the path that suits you within the chaos of War...?
Post by: Sapphira on August 16, 2003, 10:29:00 AM
Oh, you can also read it here at FanFiction.Net. It's been modified a little there.
Oh, and I heard that your story was good by going to your story's thread, and skipping past it down to others' comments. 
Don't worry; I'll get to reading it eventually... If I ever have time... 
--------------------
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools, because they have to say something.
Post by: Markio on August 16, 2003, 04:10:00 PM
Relish is at your command!
Post by: Dairy King on August 17, 2003, 07:27:00 PM
Oh, While we're on the subject of other's fan fictions, who here is in favor of having me tie my brother(Bluto) down in front of the computer and make him post the next chapter of his story? Anyone?
Rest assured. There is no signature. There never has been, and never will be.
Post by: Dr. Mario on August 18, 2003, 01:51:00 PM
Post by: jon on August 18, 2003, 03:56:00 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Sapphira on August 18, 2003, 06:50:00 PM
--------------------
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools, because they have to say something.
Post by: jon on August 18, 2003, 07:38:00 PM
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Sapphira on August 18, 2003, 08:08:00 PM
Post by: Maestro on August 18, 2003, 10:02:00 PM
Post by: Markio on August 18, 2003, 10:22:00 PM
Relish is at your command!
Post by: Destiny Smasher on August 19, 2003, 01:08:00 PM
Well, whatever. OK, here's what I thinks o far- it's gotten a LOT better, I love all the emotional stuff, but..I dunno...
I mean, FOUR YEARS, and the Mario Bros. don't get a **** thing accomplished? I mean...Come on! Ahem. Well, whatever, it's still fairly good. Sounds more like a soap opera now, but...*glances around nervously* Despite the fact I hate soap operas, I LOVE soap-opera-ish fanfiction, in many cases.
Anyway...Hey, since a couple of other people did it...I'm gonna give you a smaple of my work, allright? Hm...But...? What TYPE of section should it BE? One about the Yoshies...? How about Mario...? Or the Koopalings? Or Kamek? What about teh League of Smashers...?! Gah! Action, drama, romance...?! I DON'T KNOW HOW TO CHOOSE!!
REGAIN YOUR POSTURE, YOU BUFFOON!!!
...
OK, I'm better.
Yay! I found a section that's perfect! Take a peek. (It's from Chapter 22, but...The Chapters aren't increcibly long, so...)
~*~*~*~*~*
After about another minute or so, the door flew open, and Iggy felt a playful arm yank him in. he promptly yelped out in surprise as he tumbled to the carpeted floor of Wendy's bedroom.
Wendy was spoiled, many might say, but her brothers begged to differ. Wendy USED to be spoiled. When she was younger, she was RUTHLESS. But then things changed, after her mother left home, and Wendy developed into a much more kind-hearted kid.
She had her own room because she was the only girl, of course. Not only did it have a wood door, but it also had a soft, navy blue floor of carpet, with various pictures of this and that on her walls. Of course, the boys had these, too, just not of the same taste. While Wendy preferred photos of family get-togethers and old friends long gone, Morton and Roy had pictures of deformed skulls and rock bands, while Lemmy and Larry had various posters of female pop artists like Cindy Lynn the sky blue Yoshi, lead vocalist of the 'LavaLava Lamps' or Ally Bean the Fungiade, guitarist of 'The Mistake'.
A marvelously crafted oak dresser, painted white with curved edges and gold handle rested dead ahead. On the right was Wendy's bed, which was about twice her height in length. It had silk curtains surrounding it which created a classic 'Princess' type of look. The room was dimly lit at the time by a chandelier which hung from the ceiling, made of glowing yellow rocks which were strung by small, silver chains.
But Iggy wasn't paying much attention to the scenery- he was focused on his sister with a concerned look about him. Her red shell sat on the floor next to her dresser, the small gold spikes glimmering in the light. Right now she was wearing a soft, fuzzy outfit made of a light pink. A plain pair of shorts were accompanied by a shirt of the same material. Upon the chest of the shirt was the image of a broken heart with two little angel wings popping out of the sides.
"Uh...So...?" Iggy was too tired to think of what this was about.
"Yea," Wendy muttered, nodding quickly.
"You think it's weird, too, don't you?" she whispered seriously.
Iggy was puzzled a moment, but he could tell by the look in her eye what she was talking to. This was one example of how much a friendship could bond between two siblings.
"I do," he admitted slowly. "I don't get why Dad left so suddenly and such, and why Grandpa is in charge. I mean, usually it's Ludwig who takes the reigns...I think something's up..."
"Something IS up, Igg," Wendy whispered, a little fear in her voice. Iggy stared at her with a frown, curious.
"What do you mean...?" he asked slowly.
Wendy sighed and placed her palm on her forehead for a moment, the short, red-painted claws on the ends of her finger spreading out on her yellow skin.
"I overheard Grandpa talking to some guys earlier and stuff, and..."
"...And what?" Iggy demanded, on the edge of his seat.
"Grandpa lied to us!" Wendy whimpered out quickly.
Iggy paused, his jaw dropped.
"...But Grandpa never lies..." he murmrued in awe.
Wendy nodded hurriedly, and continued.
"I know, I know...OK, I guess he didn't LIE, but...He misled us."
"...How so?" Iggy muttered, keeping his cool.
Wendy clasped her hands together in her lap as she sat cross-legged.
"Well...He said that Daddy went on vacation, right...?"
Her brother simply nodded, his brows furrowed, his jaw ajar.
"Well...What he DIDN'T tell us is that Daddy's not supposed to be coming back..."
Iggy froze, now understanding.
"Whoa...Wait, what makes you so sure?" he demanded calmly, reaching his arms out to console Wendy.
"I-I heard him talk about how he kicked Daddy out, and how he's the King now..." Wendy mumbled, pushing her brother's arms away.
Iggy shook his head in disbelief. This was unlike anything he'd ever dreamed of. His father- KICKED OUT of the castle? Then again, it HAD happened before, hadn't it? No, that was different. Smithy had no relation. But their own GRANDFATHER? Now THAT was a shock.
"Well...I...-" Iggy couldn't find words.
Wendy glared at him frightfully, her teeth grit in worry.
"And you'll never guess who's inside the castle as we speak!" she squealed out.
Iggy shook his head slightly, awaiting the answer.
Wendy took a deep breath before her trembling voice managed to mutter the answer.
"...Grampa's having a meeting with the 'King of Evil'...Ganondorf!!"
~*~*~*~*~*
By the way, er...They refer to Kamek as their Grandpa, because Kamek raised Bowser from childhood after his parents were killed, blablabla...I'll save that history lesson for another day. Anyway, although not really related, Kamek is a grandfather figure to the Koopalings. So, what's the deal? Hehe...Read my fic and you'll find out! :P And, ya know, feel free to advertise your story a bit on my topic, too, I certainly don't mind.
Sapphira, keep up the AWESOME work. It's a good story, and I'm dying to read more, OK? (Wait...I'm only on Chapter 13, and...HEY! I CAN read more, huh? Sweet!)
~~~
OK, NOW I've read all of it, and MAN has the style improved! MUCH better, I love it even more than before. I just want to tell you that this fic is really good, and to never give up on it like so many people have with their OWN awesome fics.
Ahem...Um...SO I guess I'll just wait here, then...
~*~*~*~*~*
Your World, my World...What''s the difference? There is none. Our worlds are all connected by the same sky...The same Destiny...It''s beginning...A War...But when the time comes, whose side will you be on? And whose side will Fate favor?
Only time will tell...Time is of the essence...Your Quest for Destiny is underway, my friend...But will you find the path that suits you within the chaos of War...?
Edited by - Destiny Smasher on 8/22/2003 9:37:57 AM
Post by: Markio on August 22, 2003, 08:45:00 PM
Relish is at your command!
Post by: Sapphira on August 22, 2003, 09:13:00 PM
See Marionut#1's post on page 11. Now add SCHOOL and HOMEWORK to that, not to mention the extra stuff I have to do in yearbook and art... And friends... And being a mod here... And TV... and video games, of course... (and, well, duh, *some* sleep, obviously... XD)
And, as I said in an earlier post: "Umm...I have a life...?" (Now, much to my discouragement, I do. XD )
So...from now on, unless you guys have comments on the story itself, or have read it for the first time, please don't post in this topic anymore. It's getting to be FILLED with posts asking me to continue the story (*cough*page 10 on*cough*).
I know you all like it and want me to finish, and I'm very flattered... but pestering me is getting to be a bit annoying...and making me feel worse about it... I honestly have NO idea when I'll get the chance to work on it some more, but until then, please be patient about it. I mean, you'll have to be *VERY* patient...
Thanks for all your support though...
--------------------
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools, because they have to say something.
Post by: Sapphira on October 06, 2003, 07:42:00 PM
Note: I have NO idea when I'll continue the rest of it... >_<
--------------------
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools, because they have to say something.
Post by: jon on October 06, 2003, 07:59:00 PM
BTW, when will you put up the next part?
-----------------------------
Mario likes to dance in his backwards pants! Yay!
Post by: Markio on October 07, 2003, 04:53:00 PM
(don't answer my question, it was rhetorical(I love that word!))
If you don''t have anything nice to say, make sure you have something heavy to throw.
Post by: Vash_the_Stampede on October 18, 2003, 02:03:00 AM
"Dangerous toys are fun, but you have to be careful."
-Vash the Stampede
Post by: luigi~lover on October 18, 2003, 06:12:00 PM
Anyways, thats a great story so far sapph! I'm very pround of you!
*pats sapph on the head*
Thats the greatest story I've read on the internet in my short pointless life! And it isn't even finshed! YAY!! I just wanted to say keep up the good work!!
Don''t wear a frown, it''s never worth while, just try your best, and SMILE SMILE SMILE!
Edited by - luigi~lover on 10/18/2003 5:40:16 PM
Post by: Dairy King on October 18, 2003, 06:38:00 PM
Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused!
Post by: luigi~lover on October 18, 2003, 06:42:00 PM
Don''t wear a frown, it''s never worth while, just try your best, and SMILE SMILE SMILE!
Post by: Dairy King on October 18, 2003, 07:28:00 PM
Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused!
Post by: WarpRattler on November 02, 2003, 01:13:00 AM
("o0o") My metroid thinks you are stupid. People who
...v...v disagree with metroids often get sucked dry.
Oh, and Lizard Dude:"And there was this great Food Festival! Did you know that food this and food that...."-jon
Post by: tom ato on November 04, 2003, 11:34:00 PM
i printed it out (its 30 pages long without the other posts) i hope you post the rest soon i cant wait to find out what happens next
i am the 1 and only tom ato (tomato) mario (the olny mario that throws tomatoes insted of fire balls)
Post by: Jman on November 07, 2003, 08:22:00 PM
Proud to be an American!
Post by: Markio on December 09, 2003, 08:47:00 PM
If chickens had lips, could they whistle?
Post by: WarpRattler on December 22, 2003, 10:15:00 PM
("o0o") My metroid thinks you are stupid. People who
...v...v disagree with metroids often get sucked dry.
Post by: Dairy King on December 23, 2003, 11:38:00 PM
...And my dear sweet mother, she just looked at me like a cow looks at an oncoming train. She leaned right down next to me, and she said,"IT''S GOOD FOR YOU!!!"
Post by: Screech on December 24, 2003, 12:11:00 AM
"Walk softly and carry a Super Scope."
Post by: Sapphira on May 30, 2004, 05:18:00 PM
Chapter 14 (last updated)
...Uh oh... I've been bad... >_>;
--------------------
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools, because they have to say something.
Post by: Black Mage on May 30, 2004, 07:33:00 PM
As long as you keep posting, I'll keep reading. :-)
Post by: Jman on May 30, 2004, 07:45:00 PM
Something I might say to marioguy in the circle: "If you can''t say something kind, then shut your mouth and get the heck outta my circle!"
Post by: Vidgmchtr on May 31, 2004, 10:34:00 PM
Post by: Jman on June 01, 2004, 08:37:00 AM
Post by: NintendoExpert89 on July 22, 2004, 01:44:00 PM
Friends? Heh, these are my only friends- grown-up nerds like Gore Vidal; and even he''s kissed more boys than I ever will.
Post by: TJOghost8 on July 28, 2004, 04:46:00 PM
Know why the elderly contribute so much to the church? To buy their way into Heaven from a lifetime of sin.
Post by: Lizard Dude on August 01, 2004, 08:14:00 PM
Holy cow that story was awesome! *faints*
Zounds! I just remembered my one critique that no one had said before. You use italics too much. Look at the body of published works. Italics aren't really needed. Let the writing do the work, not the typeset. The gratuitous italics started to distract and annoy me. The reader doesn't need that much help figuring out what words are stressed unless you are explicitly trying to convey that an sentence was stressed unusually.
But...
The story is still awesome! I didn't expect it! *high-five*
“I’m a stupid fatty and I love to play with my Easy Bake oven.”
Post by: MarlieMoo on August 02, 2004, 10:00:00 PM
Post by: tom ato on August 28, 2004, 06:35:00 PM
if mario went on a diet and stopped hen he was as thin as luigi wouls we have to call him marigi
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on September 18, 2004, 12:55:00 PM
"Kids, don''t use formula one race cars to chase hedgehogs."
Edited by - Yoshisaurus Rex on 9/19/2004 7:37:10 AM
Post by: GenocideGtarist on January 09, 2005, 12:30:00 PM
Post by: GenocideGtarist on January 09, 2005, 12:37:00 PM
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on January 09, 2005, 02:31:00 PM
"Oh great. From now I am shall forever be known as the king who talks to posters."
Edited by - Yoshisaurus Rex on 1/15/2005 7:05:09 PM
Post by: MarlieMoo on January 15, 2005, 03:38:00 PM
Post by: Sapphira on December 19, 2005, 09:05:06 PM
Since the topic is intact, eventually it'll be migrated over as well, but I have no idea when. So for the meantime, I've uploaded the topic (which contains all the posts and whatnot, as well as the fanfic) to my Kontek account. If you want to read it, it can be found here (http://kontek.net/starhaven/StoryBoards-TheProphecy.htm). Images are broken, I know, but it's better than nothing for now.
If you wish to comment to the topic, you can do so in here (considering it won't even work there...).
Once the old "The Prophecy" thread is migrated, I'll merge this topic into it, and all will be well.
For the time being, enjoy!
Edit: I'm also going to sticky this when it's migrated because of the story's popularity, awesomeness, and because I can. ;P
Post by: Ultima Shadow on December 19, 2005, 09:52:33 PM
Post by: Koopaslaya on December 19, 2005, 10:40:12 PM
Post by: Black Mage on December 19, 2005, 11:20:20 PM
Though, now that I know you a little better, and have been exposed to more of your writing, I have ascertained that you most certainly have a knack for writing.
You can still count me among your eager readers, even if I don't reply all that often. :-)
Post by: BP on December 20, 2005, 12:14:41 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on December 20, 2005, 12:28:03 AM
Post by: BP on December 20, 2005, 01:25:04 AM
Post by: Sapphira on December 20, 2005, 01:37:43 AM
Post by: Lizard Dude on December 20, 2005, 01:39:29 AM
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on December 20, 2005, 12:19:38 PM
When I look at my posts in that thread I'm surprised that I used to act so sarcastic. 444 complaints... yeah, that's real nice Y.R. I'm glad that I can behave a little better than usual now. A lot of it I give thanks to the FF!
Hold it! Lizard Dude made a sig from that little Frosty the Snowman verse I wrote about him? Someone actually did it for the first time!! Heehee, I got it!
Post by: PaperLuigi on December 20, 2005, 06:47:03 PM
Post by: Markio on January 01, 2006, 12:33:47 PM
Post by: BP on January 01, 2006, 05:20:40 PM
Aah, it's a 404...
Post by: Sapphira on January 01, 2006, 07:29:28 PM
If you wish to comment to the topic, you can do so in here (considering it won't even work there...).
Post by: Ultima Shadow on January 01, 2006, 07:42:08 PM
Post by: bobman37 on January 01, 2006, 08:16:15 PM
EDIT: Just done with Chapter 5. Sapph, you're really good at writing. One major thing that separates the author wannabes from the bestsellers- Good writers can draw an image in the readers' minds with their words. I'm not reading your story- i'm watching it.
I should get working on a story... I think I'm a pretty good writer, but that has yet to be seen. Maybe I'll get around to writing one, and if it's any good, I'll post it.
Post by: BP on January 01, 2006, 09:45:53 PM
Bird Person, no offense, but you got seriously pwned.XP I sure did...
Post by: bobman37 on January 03, 2006, 01:55:09 PM
Post by: Sapphira on January 17, 2006, 03:59:28 PM
Well, sweet, now I can merge the topics, and everything will be back in business! (...Except for the, uh...finishing the story, which I have absolutely no idea when I'll even get to that, so please stop asking or begging. XD)
I can't express how grateful I am for all this. Thank you again, MegaByte. :)
Post by: Khold on January 17, 2006, 04:02:25 PM
Whoohoo! I can't wait to see the rest!
Post by: BP on January 17, 2006, 07:00:28 PM
Edit: Stupid me. They've already been merged.
Post by: Koopaslaya on January 17, 2006, 08:46:17 PM
Post by: BP on January 17, 2006, 08:50:21 PM
Post by: Markio on January 21, 2006, 10:08:31 PM
*Gives thumbs up*
Whoohoo! I can't wait to see the rest!
You'll have to wait. :P Unless Sapphira suddenly wants to finish it... which she hasn't for the past 2.7 YEARS!
Post by: BP on January 22, 2006, 12:41:45 AM
Post by: Khold on January 22, 2006, 12:49:17 AM
You'll have to wait. :P Unless Sapphira suddenly wants to finish it... which she hasn't for the past 2.7 YEARS!Yeah, I know...
Post by: Sapphira on January 22, 2006, 01:02:19 AM
I have absolutely no idea when I'll even get to that, so please stop asking or begging. XD...Did you draw that on your monitor, BP? x_X
Post by: Khold on January 22, 2006, 01:19:11 AM
Post by: BP on January 22, 2006, 01:29:05 AM
Post by: MaxVance on February 03, 2006, 06:23:16 PM
Post by: Toad on February 15, 2006, 03:17:19 AM
Anyway, good job Sapphira!
..
and don't make us wait!
j/k :p
Take all the time you need, b/c rushed things are never as good as.. not rushed things.
Post by: Ultima Shadow on February 15, 2006, 03:26:41 AM
*Goes back to pleading*
Post by: Ludwig on February 22, 2006, 05:13:55 PM
Great work!
Post by: The Blue Toad on February 26, 2006, 04:12:25 PM
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on April 30, 2006, 10:04:03 PM
Post by: MaxVance on May 01, 2006, 05:41:03 AM
Post by: Koopaslaya on May 01, 2006, 08:30:40 PM
Post by: Sapphira on May 01, 2006, 10:56:27 PM
<_<
>_<;
XD
Post by: Yoshisaurus Rex on May 05, 2006, 10:41:39 PM
Post by: Falco-JIS on May 28, 2006, 11:31:15 PM
This is such a well written story! You've done a very good job with the plot, characters' feelings, and moods. It's such a great tragedy ='( It was truly sad to read how Bowser does... well you know... and Peach ends up dying in the end, but it was so well plotted. You have a very wonderful talent for writing a great story. And don't worry, I'm not rushing you on making your next chapter. I know how it feels to have so much homework in the way. X_x
There were many elements besides the tragedy that I liked. There was the romance between Mario and Peach, a pairing that I will always stick to. (There are so many absurd pairing of Peach out there these days.) The romantic emotions from Mario and Peach gave me a nice warm feeling the I can't really describe right now. XD
There was also the fact that Melony didn't know how she came to be or why her mother died.
So keep up the good work! ^_^ And just to tell you, I have been working on a fan-novel about Princess Peach for about a year. The novel talks about Peach's deepest and darkest secret. (Which I won't tell you until you have finished reading some of my novel.) The novel is called Like You've Never Seen Her Before. It is on some sites, but you don't have to worry; it will come to the Fungi Fourms very soon. ^w^ Oh, and by the way, it's still in the works, like you wonderful story The Prophecy.
Post by: Jman on May 31, 2006, 09:20:34 PM
Post by: The Chef on June 01, 2006, 01:46:59 PM
Post by: MaxVance on June 03, 2006, 10:04:32 AM
May... 16... 2003...
May... 16... 2003...
May... 16... 2003...
Post by: MetalMario on July 07, 2006, 09:30:59 AM
Post by: MaxVance on July 07, 2006, 04:59:55 PM
Post by: Ultima Shadow on July 07, 2006, 09:52:02 PM
Post by: SushieBoy on July 07, 2006, 10:22:26 PM
Post by: Ultima Shadow on July 07, 2006, 10:44:36 PM
http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=8856.msg357552#msg357552 (http://themushroomkingdom.net/board/index.php?topic=8856.msg357552#msg357552)
Post by: SushieBoy on July 07, 2006, 11:19:05 PM
Post by: Ultima Shadow on July 07, 2006, 11:21:42 PM
Post by: SushieBoy on July 07, 2006, 11:27:40 PM
Post by: MaxVance on July 08, 2006, 05:43:31 AM
May... 16... 2003...Even I can't stop wondering when there will be a next chapter.
May... 16... 2003...
May... 16... 2003...
May... 16... 2003...
Post by: PaperMario on August 23, 2006, 11:13:21 PM
Post by: MaxVance on August 24, 2006, 09:09:06 PM
Post by: Toad on August 26, 2006, 05:10:25 PM
I thought Sapph had posted a new chapter.
Post by: MaxVance on August 30, 2006, 05:49:08 AM
/me sighs
Post by: NintendoExpert89 on August 30, 2006, 05:50:40 AM
Post by: Ultima Shadow on August 30, 2006, 04:05:46 PM
Post by: BP on August 30, 2006, 06:01:37 PM
Next time someone posts here, DON'T POST AGAIN JUST TO SAY "Oh, I thought there was a new chapter." Then the slowbies come in 5 days later and make the same comment, and it becomes a never-ending chain! And I just continued that chain... Sorry.
Post by: Koopaslaya on August 30, 2006, 06:33:53 PM
Post by: Nintendoobsessed on September 06, 2007, 07:16:42 PM
Post by: MaxVance on September 06, 2007, 08:20:27 PM