Jim, your environmentally-friendly die comes up paper. You leave the store and receive 1000 DANGER EXPERIENCE for completing your quest. You and Baby Sauron each gain a level! You may put one point into the skill of your choice. He gets a level of Charm, which gives him +3 to his already considerably high chick magnet stat.
Turtlekid, you have the option of going on a quest to slay your grandfather in an attempt to cancel out the paradox with another one. Do you accept?