Joke I
I can't think of anything worse after a night of drinking than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their name, or how you met, or why they're dead.
Joke II
Ultimate phone prank
1. Call the childline number and say 'i've just dialed 1471 and this number came up, who is this?'
2. Operator replies 'you're through to childline'
3. You shout 'TERRY YOU LITTLE ****, NOT AGAIN....COME HERE YOU LITTLE *******''. before hanging up the phone