bobman37in
Guitar Hero II: The TragedyAn epic starring bobman37
In I walked, first to arrive at the local Play n Trade used videogame store. What can I say? I was excited for my first real tournament.
I had run through my plan over and over in my mind. Don't accept their song choice. Try to figure out which songs they suck at. Don't forget Killing in the Name. And, most of all, don't choke.
The first competitor practically ran through the doorway, not five minutes after my arrival. He was your typical ten-year-old kid, short, glasses, optimistic. I had never seen a case for a Guitar Hero controller until that moment. I was almost impressed.
almost.Then he started talking. My slightly-impressed first impression quickly turned to disgust. I have very low tolerance for obnoxious high-pitched annoying things. This kid fit the bill perfectly. This was set to be a long few hours.
All four of the other competitors slowly trickled into the store, none passing my belly button in height. Each carried his own sticker-decked GH controller, most of them red. Turns out the kid with the case actually had a wireless controller. None seemed coordinated enough even to handle a two-note chord. Then I slipped up: I doomed myself. Started counting my chickens before they hatched. I was figuring out where my $50-in-store-credit first prize was going to be blown. Thought I had it in the bag. Way to go, bobman. You just screwed yourself before you even played a note.
Because little did I know. One of the two staff members at the store turned to one of the short, third-to-fifth-grade-age kids.
"Hey!" he said.
"You're that kid on YouTube!"
What?I was half-paying attention, half-watching the first two kids wield their axes and battle it out. I was concentrated on how stiff the competition would actually be. So concentrated, in fact, I had no idea a legend was seven feet away from me.
The store employee rushed to his computer. Clicked the mouse a few times, typed a few letters. I turned my head, growing tired with the Heroes currently dueling. They had no skill of immediate importance.
The employee turned his computer so people could watch the video* he pulled up. I looked over at the kid smiling up at me.
I looked back at the screen.
Same kid. I was blown away.
I watched the video for a bit. Impeccable playing. Ripping it up. I was screwed.
************************************************
We met in the final round. Five songs, three to win. First Jessica, then his specialty (Psychobilly Freakout), then Light that Blinds. He won three in a row. Took "my" prize right from under my nose. I was both awestruck and frustrated.
The employee shouted, "Freebird!"
Ha ha.
Very funny.
He killed me on Freebird, too.
I got the 8-year-old legend to sign my lowly second-place T-shirt. Hopefully it'll fetch some nice dough on eBay. For now, though, I'm left with somewhat empty hands and a severely dented dignity.
*
8-year-old legend on Psychobilly FreakoutEpilogueThe kid's going to Nationals. Technically. He's really going to just send his best Freebird score in to the store. That's how they're running it.
After the tourney, I played against him on Less Talk More Rokk and Jordan just for "fun". LTMR wasn't as embarrassing. I was within 50,000 points at the end. On Jordan, he got 91 percent. I struggled for 72.
Best player I've ever seen, and he's
eight years old.Unimaginable.