New chapter. I don't know about you, but the thought of Chupperson Weird in an apron makes me ROFL very much.
Chapter Ten: Ted the Brownie Blotcher
"Agh! My precious brownies have burnt!"
Mr. Chup, with his long hair, large glasses, and pink flowery apron, stood over Ted's oven in Home Ed, observing his badly-prepared brownies. He picked up the tray, with some purple oven mitts, and stared at the brownish goo pouring out the sides.
"How much flour did you put in?" Mr. Chup exploded.
"Uh...the whole...bag sir," Ted admitted.
"Ted! Not only have you ruined your brownies, but you also wasted some very valuable flour," Mr. Chup scolded.
Drew Toad collapsed with laughter while watching Mr. Chup have a hissy fit over Ted. Ted ignored him.
"Now, you know what happens to the Brownie-Blotchers," Mr. Chup continued.
"Oh no, Mr. Chup," Ted exclaimed, "not that!"
In a matter of minutes Ted sat in the corner of the room wearing a giant dunce cap that read in big letters: BROWNIE-BLOTCHER
The whole room was filled with laughter, coming from all the students. Drew Toad looked like he was having a seizure when he was guffawing so much.
"Now settle down, silly-ninnies," Mr. Chup projected, "now, as you know, we are now going to distribute the babies that you will be looking after for the rest of the trimester."
He pointed to a large bucket of plastic baby dolls in a large tub.
"Now, we will each have a baby care diary, and you have to look after it as if it were real, and love for it."
He then began distributing the babies. Ted realized this would be an interesting unit. He looked around to see what other people thought. He noticed that Greta Gifted was putting a little Strongbad mask on he baby and smiling, but most of the rest of the class had glum, unexcited looks on their faces. Maybe he was wrong.
So, as the bell rang, Ted once again slumped into the halls. Nathan Paper walked up.
"Hey, do want to join my Homework Insurance Fund?" he chimed.
"What?"
"Oh, well, it's where you pay me money whenever you want me to do your homework instead of you!"
"Um," Ted muttered, "when have I ever wanted you to do that?"
"Well," Nathan admitted, "I just wanted more homework to do, that's all."
"Very well," Ted sighed, "I'll pay you to do all of my English homework."
"Good," Nathan snorted, "now sign here, and here."
He whiped out a contract and pointed to two corresponding places.
"Thank you for joining Nathan Paper's Homework Insurance Fund," he chimed in a professional voice, "you can drop off any of your homework at my stand outside, and pay for the amount of homework."
Ted rolled his eyes, and strolled into his Algebra class, and sat down. After a few minutes the class settled and the bell rang, and Mr. Byte started preaching.
"Welcome, grasshoppers," he announced, "today we will be discussing the sheer greatness of Pi. For Pi is something for which we all should love and cherish, and even sacrifice ourselves for," he continued, as kids across the rooms exchanged nervous looks, "now, Pi is really what we exist for, and is so great that its magnitude has blown me away for my entire life. Now...let me ask you; where would we be, without Pi?"
"Well, goshness! We wouldn't be bored about of our butts!" Patrica cornily yelled, and students guffawed around the classroom, just because Patrica was popular.
"I may be mistaken Ms. Peach," Mr. Byte muttered, "but did you insult the greatness of Pi?"
"Yeah, because it makes us bored out of our butts!"
More roars came from across the room, even though Patrica made the same joke, making her even more lame in Ted's book.
"DETENTION!"
The room fell silent except for one person.
"YES! IN YOUR FACE YOU LITTLE GOSSIP-SPREADER!"
"DETENTION AGAIN."
*****
Ted looked at Patrica from across the detention room, and mouthed, "I hate you."
