Author Topic: The HOPEFUL thread: Be happy here! (Read 1273577 times)

foxmccloudfan · « **Reply #4815 on:** January 10, 2010, 03:26:23 PM »

Quote from: CrossEyed7 on January 08, 2010, 03:54:01 PM

Closet homos? That's what I read it as for a second. Or, rather, it's what I thought Weegee would have read it as.

thats how i read it at least... that scared me for a moment or two

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #4816 on:** January 10, 2010, 03:39:06 PM »

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

foxmccloudfan · « **Reply #4817 on:** January 10, 2010, 03:45:06 PM »

Yeah, I know, it just sorta sounded like he was insulting his "closest homies" (it sounded kinda harsh to me)

Trainman · « **Reply #4818 on:** January 10, 2010, 11:24:03 PM »

We're still talking about this "closest homies" business?

Oh well... guess I better be hopeful about it.

Glorb · « **Reply #4819 on:** January 11, 2010, 03:36:48 PM »

I love my closest homies, even the closet homos and closest hornies among them.

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #4820 on:** January 16, 2010, 08:40:32 PM »

Today, our whole family went out for dinner with my three grown-up sisters. One of them had gotten a tattoo behind her ear since we'd last seen her. Dad was not happy. She responded "Come on, Dad, you can't judge people by the color of their skin." She won.

Weegee · « **Reply #4821 on:** January 16, 2010, 08:42:20 PM »

...And I lost. Where'd you go for dinner, by the way?

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #4822 on:** January 16, 2010, 08:54:45 PM »

Cracker Barrel. I had catfish.

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #4823 on:** January 16, 2010, 09:08:16 PM »

I love Cracker Barrel. Although I usually go for Country-Fried Steak.

Toad · « **Reply #4824 on:** January 16, 2010, 11:02:27 PM »

I have a new job. Mondays-Fridays, usually between 3-7, I help clean up one of the local elementary schools. I'm not really fast or great at it yet, but for 8.88 an hour, I won't complain too much. :)

A job's a job. ^_^

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #4825 on:** January 19, 2010, 04:44:34 AM »

I met a girl who I was immediately attracted to (not the one from the angst thread, btw) and was initially intimidated by my attraction, but I made the step and talked, just as friends and as people, not as potential mates and not with hours and days and weeks and months of pondering wordlessly and endlessly going over possible permutations and instead just happening, and there was a real multifaceted but simple and right connection. I outgrew Manic Pixie Dream Girls in an instant. She's a real person, just as complex as me. Whether or not anything romantic comes of it, it's the capstone on the mounting confirmation of the last 24 hours of that sudden liberating realization I had at 3 AM Monday morning, over which time I've learned so much more about myself -- this all is the biggest thing in six years, I know it -- in addition to being the start of a great friendship. And I'm really happy with no real downsides at all for the first time in a long time. For the longest time, I've only been able to look at the ups with also seeing the downs after them, and I've given in to sadness because it's easy and it feels good. But that's not me. This is. Now I know.

This isn't about a potential I'm imagining with her, and this is much more than her, it's her and it's me and it's the others and it's what I know about me from her, and I don't need more of anything than I have now. These are friends and this is who I really am.

:)

tvaoas;debttuiysi*: Screw everything I said in the angst thread. This is new and I'm happy now no matter what.

*- too vague and obtuse and stupid, didn't even bother trying to understand it you sentimental imbecile

Chupperson Weird · « **Reply #4826 on:** January 19, 2010, 11:18:00 AM »

Good job! *thumbs up*

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #4827 on:** January 19, 2010, 11:32:40 AM »

Awesome stuff, CrossEyed.

Weegee · « **Reply #4828 on:** January 19, 2010, 04:38:50 PM »

Nifty! So, what's become of the nice-nosed girl?

CrossEyed7 · « **Reply #4829 on:** January 19, 2010, 06:00:09 PM »

A vestige of a time gone by and put away. No longer will I silently admire shallow crushes from across the room for months and years on end, ever composing more and more convoluted and melodramatic fantastical monologues to them in my head that rarely leave me mouth, and certainly never in the form I had imagined; nor will I look endlessly only to an ever more distant future for some far hope of eventually being well-adjusted. While the future does hold many great things, along with many more tragedies, I will live more consciously in the present, and choose more actively at every moment to be the happy being I now know myself to be.

No longer will I occupy myself with imagined conversations with a girl whose Facebook profile told me that she shares my interests in bubble wrap and the buttons on top of soda cup lids, whom I would sooner work up the courage to skydive than to talk to, when I have one right here who loves Zelda and Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged and singing Aladdin songs at 2 AM and who is already comfortable around me and I with her and who's nervous like me even while both our nervousnesses are quickly dying. No longer do I need to mentally create someone who is just like me except more so and better, when I have begun to experience the joy of knowing someone that is so different and yet so similar and better in some ways and worse in others. And no longer will I need to imagine a future where we've been married for twenty years to look forward to a time when I can feel happy and fulfilled, when I've got a great friend right now.

Surprisingly, I'm not really even mad that I didn't have this epiphany years ago. I've still got plenty of time left -- most of all today -- and if I had figured it out sooner, I don't know where I'd be now or whether I'd have ever met the people I know now.

The future never comes. It's always today. A year after writing that, I have truly begun to understand it.

So... which thread should I monopolize with vague stories about girls next?