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Messages - Insane Steve

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General Chat / Re: New/Returning Members Post Here!
« on: December 15, 2014, 08:54:35 PM »
Here's a post. I'm not dead, somehow!

Not at the Dinner Table / Re: Your F Score?
« on: December 15, 2014, 08:22:32 PM »
Now down to 1.533333...

Seriously, a score above about 3.5 or so on this indicates actual mental illness or irreversible indoctrination from the willfully ignorant. [darn]. Also seriously, did anyone notice the benchmark for the scale used here was from NINETEEN FIFTY?!? You know, when being against segregation was considered against society? Wow. And the average tally then is is STILL LESS THAN 4?!

EDIT: Also I noticed the descriptions for the extreme ends seems weirdly reversed. Yea, give the very direct uncreative insults to the far left, but give insults that REQUIRE historical knowledge and ability to interpret metaphor to the far right. How many 'Baggers out there would get the "black shirt" reference? I can probably count them on the the fingers of the right hand I'm not raising as a sign of some former foreign party's salute.

General Chat / Re: I'm going away! Signed, TMK member
« on: January 19, 2014, 11:10:24 PM »
Hey, been a while. Back for my usual once every so much time check in and post a few times and stuff. How's things?


This person is being 100% serious and genuinely believes his message fwiw, he's from a psychotic wingnut Xtian cult

or and here's his Twitter if you need more proof/ways to lose:

Gotta love ******s.

I thought this was more hilarious than rageworthy. "was it a nuke" yea, bosten's a steaming crater now bro, let's play xbox before everyone dies

sweet it's gunna b like fallout 3 bro

General Chat / Re: What is found under your bed
« on: April 06, 2013, 11:07:29 PM »
My mattress is directly on a mattress pad, which is directly on the floor. So, nothing, because nothing would fit.

So did the truck driver lose the suit?

To the best of my knowledge, as soon as the police report came out, they dropped it.

Oh jeez. At the moment, I am only prepared to say that I am glad that the person you hit did not also crash. When I read the number 196 comment I prepared for a tear-jerker.

So far, my worst traffic experience was sliding off a frozen eastern Washington road and wandering around in the snowy darkness looking for a cell phone signal. A combination of kind passers-by and a trip to higher elevation saved the day. Coincidentally, it was my final trip home from Washington State University.

Weird thing about the other person, they took off and fled the accident scene. The witness was able to give a cursory description of the car (whereas, when asked, my description of it was "I think it was a car, and not a van or truck. I was a lot more worried about not getting killed than what the car I just hit looked like.") but all things considered I'm pretty sure that he both wasn't identified and didn't want to be identified. Looking at the damages to my car, that impact is probably the least damaging thing that happened.

As for your incident, when I was first seeing my girlfriend and she lived in South Bend your description reminded me so much of SR 45 it's not funny. Glad that you got through that without incident.

Anyways, since then not a ton happened. I described it thusly on the other board, but... this is a reallllly depressing post looking back, so you've been warned and all that. It's just that this is a really accurate description of how I'm thinking of this accident, and knowing what it feels like to be me is a great experience*. *nod*

Epilogue: Aside from that one letter, I have since not heard a single peep from the truck driver or anyone associated with him since the police report finding him the responsible party was released. How about that.  ;)

9 days after the crash, I drove to my girlfriend's place. Incidentally, far and away the fastest way to get there uses this exact stretch of highway, so I sucked it up and drove past the accident scene. It was, of course, as if nothing had happened. Mile marker 0.1 on the IN side of IL/IN 80/94 was a somewhat unnerving sign to look at for me despite all the other vehicles passing it without a second thought. It's a bit odd to think that, potentially, any particular place could bring up terrifying emotions for specific people, while for almost everyone else this area is so ordinary, and there's no way to know that a person might be so emotionally shaken up by a simple traffic sign.

The vastly more unsettling sign was at mile 0 -- that electronic sign which served as such a sobering reminder of both my own mortality and relative meaninglessness in the vast scheme of things had been updated. In 9 days, 195 had become 222. Every day since the accident (including that day), there were, on average, 3 people in Illinois who had something extremely similar happen to them with a very substantially more tragic result. 27 separate stories of horrific tragedy condensed into three changed panels on an oft-ignored cautionary road sign. The ride to my girlfriend's, which is significantly longer than the ride to work, went uneventfully, as it had the dozens of times I've made it before. You really don't realise how much of a waste it is when you waste your life until something like that happens. It can happen at any time, and it can happen to anyone. I'll openly admit, I was not in the best of mental states before that accident, and at certain times wasn't even sure if living was worth it.

This accident took those doubts and smashed them into non-existence. If anything else, 223 is a much less aesthetically pleasing number than 222, anyways. I haven't been on that road since then, though. I wonder how many more life stories have been added to the tally board in the last week.

*this is a Mario Party reference, don't know why I think it's appropriate here but when I first saw this quote in game I identified with it disturbingly well

General Chat / Re: The ANGST thread: Complain here!
« on: April 06, 2013, 12:34:48 AM »
Alright, so the place I work is transitioning to a new system for grading online exams. I learn a couple days ago that I've been re-assigned as the lead instructor for a pre-calculus course, when I was intended to be the back-up to one of the more senior instructors.

To prepare for this duty, I decide to take some of the exams blind to make sure I actually remember how to do all the stuff in the course. It's mildly unsettling when I get a B on the second exam in the course.

I look over the two problems I got wrong, and it turns out that, no, I'm prettttttttty sure I knew how to do those things. I had a hard time getting up that day so I was a bit tired... who knows, I might be delirious and just may be bad at math today. I throw the necessary equations in Wolfram Alpha and discover that, no, I'm not too tired to do math, it's just the tests are written by drunk MBAs who forgot how to do pre-calc because, you know, that's the sort of thing you don't need to remember how to do when daddy has a job writing exam problems lined up for you out of college. I mean, how hard can math be it's not like anyone's ever held back in high school because they can't do it or anything sheesh

I then learn that, because of the way the hierarchy of the online exam program works, as a not-exactly-senior member of the instructional staff I don't have privileges to open the exam question bank and fix the problems. In fact, only one math instructor has these rights. I bring up my discovery to her today.

She laughs and tells many stories about how the last online grading program (owned by the same company, incidentally) had a calculus course where, initially, roughly 1/4th the questions were flawed, and the support for the site absolutely did not care when informed about this. The best story is when she called the company and was told about the company's vaunted "97% accuracy in writing questions" - which is hunky-dory for those who haven't heard of the binomial distribution, but when you consider that on a 25 question exam,  there is a less than 1/2 chance that a student will not get any flawed problems, is sort of a big deal. We bring this up to the person assigned to dealing with this firm. She also laughs. Much disparaging conversation ensues, mainly involving alcohol and the merits of drawing eyes on a parabola as a mnemonic for remembering if the coefficient of the x^2 term is positive or negative (if it looks like the graph is smiling, it has a positive attitude and opens up, and if it looks sad, it's being negative and opens down. Ah ha ha ha!).

My job duties for the rest of the day involve taking more tests and writing down all the problems with wrong answers, which are disturbingly common (yea, change the base of that problem on logarithms mid-problem from 10 in the problem to e in the "right" answer and see if I notice). It depresses me to think of a average high school student who isn't amazing at nor cares about math doing a difficult problem right, having it marked wrong anyways, and suddenly doubting their abilities.

But I mean it's not like we have a staff of people who are fully capable of writing their own math problems for tests or anything. It's, of course, far better to outsource this duty to a company with a proven track record of incompetence.

For those of you on these boards years younger than I... yes, this is pretty much a perfect anecdote to describe how the real world works.

Mario Chat / Re: Why Yoshi's Island DS makes no sense
« on: April 04, 2013, 06:32:52 PM »
I love the games just the same.

but this thread is about Yoshi's Island DS though

General Chat / Re: The AMBIVALENT Thread: Have Mixed Feelings Here!
« on: April 04, 2013, 03:48:45 PM »
For what it's worth I've heard that's a correlation/causation sort of thing, like iirc literally the only statistically significant factor in predicting how successful someone will be is how successful their parents are (land of opportunity lol), and the types of parents who give their children awful names tend to not be from the most successful families. On the other hand, I know firsthand that my mom's boss immediately bins all resumes with "ethnic" sounding names without reading them, so there might be a hint of truth to it, who knows.

Basically copy-pasted from another board, but I figured I should throw this here, since it's kind of an important event in my life.

So, Thursday a couple weeks ago (March 21st) started like most other Thursdays in the last couple months. Get up at stupid'o'clock for work, take an unnecessarily long shower, prepare myself for work, leave the house 5 minutes later than expected, and compensate by taking the literal shortest route to work to get there on time. This route involves traveling for about 4 miles on a multi-lane expressway, 80/94 on the Illinois/Indiana border.

For those unfamiliar with American highways of this sort, 80/94 is a 5 lane highway where the "slow" lane on the far right has people going about 20% over the speed limit, and the left lane runs at about 30-40% faster. I am in the second to right most lane, going about 70 mph/110 kmph passing along the right hand side of a semi-truck which is going slightly slower.

All of the sudden, the semi-truck driver flips his right-turn signal and immediately goes back to fanning (lol in-jokes on other boards) starts to change into the lane on his right. If you've been paying attention, you'll note that this lane is not exactly empty (that is to say, there is now a semi-truck that is very content with ramming the left side of my car). As luck would have it, I notice this and have juuuuuuuuuust enough time to merge into the rightmost lane to avoid this truck. I, unfortunately, do not have enough time to actually see if there's any cars in the rightmost lane right next to me which may make a lane change fairly difficult.

It of course goes without saying that there is a car exactly alongside me on the right when I try to make this lane change, and since I do not have a magical transmuting car that passes through solid objects, I hit this car and can't make the lane change. I have just enough time to swear about getting into the third car accident this month and fourth in three months and make the odd observation that the car I hit is speeding away instead of stopping (when the accident is not at all his fault) before I learn that the semi-truck STILL is insistent on getting into my lane at all cost, first slamming the front end of my car merging, spinning the rear driver's side end into the truck bed, and causing my car to immediately begin a very hard right hand turn into a solid concrete wall.

Fortunately, I recognise that things have officially gotten real and very reflexively jerk the wheel hard left while hard braking. The car skids nearly parallel to the lanes for a couple seconds before friction does its thing and forces the car towards the wall uncontrollably. Luckily, I kept the car in this state just long enough for the collision with the wall to be angular instead of direct, causing me to spin 540 degrees back into the highway and come to a full stop in the center of the rightmost lane. Fortunately, that extra half rotation causes the driver's side door to align nicely with the shoulder, and the driver's side door was the one door not damaged in the crash, so I was able to abandon the car quickly and run into the shoulder. My immediate thought at this point is "wow, I can actually still run after that?!"

My next immediate observation is the shards of broken windshield everywhere, and the stuffed fish I had in the back seat being... unsettlingly far away from the crash site, having been thrown out the rear windshield. I immediately call my parents at work to tell them what happened, which was great when the loud noises of passing traffic drowned out everything from the other end and I couldn't hear anything, while my parents got such awesome lines as "I totaled the car" and "you almost f___ing killed me" (directed at the truck driver who had just walked over to the crash site at the time).

Now, imagine you're a truck driver who has just been in an accident, and you see a mangled car leaking all kinds of fluids and a panicked guy on the phone who may or may not have serious injuries standing next to it. What is the first thing you say to this person? If your answer was similar to "There's really no way that could've been avoided," and to walk away back to your truck, then you may have a future career as a truck driver. You may also be lacking a soul, but thems the breaks.

At this point I notice emergency crews closing the right lane, a tow truck approaching, and a car on the shoulder that appears undamaged with someone standing next to him. I approach the man and he immediately asks if I'm hurt, and tells me he saw everything that happened in the accident and stopped to see if everything was ok. After a short talk the first police arrive at the scene. I give them my information, in the meantime the witness explains to the police what happened. Afterwards, I hop into the passenger side of the police car to give my side of what happened and to actually explain this to my parents, since I now can actually hear them and they're in complete hysterics over what they overheard in the first call.

About 50 feet in front of the crash, on the Illinois/Indiana border, there is an electronic sign. It flashed the message "195 traffic deaths in Illinois this year | buckle up and drive safely." In a bizarre coincidence, 196 is now my least favorite number.

I notice that the truck driver doesn't even seem to notice or care that there was a 3rd party witness, but is already telling the police about how my negligence damaged the cab of his truck (hint: I didn't even so much as touch the cab of his truck). I overhear that he's driving on a suspended license. Spiffy. Right before the officer went to drop me off at a local Burger King to meet up with my parents, he tells me he needs to issue a citation to the truck driver first. He does this, heads back in the car, and takes me to Burger King.

I get to Burger King, and it's about at this very point where the gravity of what just happened hits me like, well, an irresponsible semi-truck driver. Sentences start to become very difficult to form, and my mind immediately does its best to run a stochastic analysis of the probability of me being dead right now (I estimate it at about 30%). Either way, I get picked up, and stay home from work that day because I'm pretty much freaking out at this point.

The very next day we get a letter in the mail stating that the driver is suing us for damages to his truck, postmarked THE DATE OF THE ACCIDENT. I mean, wow, really? As for me, my right hand was a bit sore the day of the accident, but it stopped that night and I was able to go to work and do my job which involves a lot of writing with no problems.

Long story short, the truck driver was obviously found at fault, the car was totaled, and I actually got a higher than expected amount from the insurer for it. For reference, here's pictures of the car (attached). Remember: I was not injured in any way whatsoever.

I attribute me surviving this accident to either the amazing reflexes I gained from playing way too many video games, or picking the best time ever to throw a natural 20. Either way, I'm both happily alive, and a gigantic nerd.

So, yea, near-death experiences. Anyone have any?

General Chat / Re: The AMBIVALENT Thread: Have Mixed Feelings Here!
« on: April 03, 2013, 10:14:21 PM »
Grading papers a couple days ago. One problem involves the salaries of two recently hired people (teaching arithmetic/geometric sequences). One of these people is named Neveah, which I personally consider to be the single worst semi-popular name ever created for either sex (and the fact that my spell-checker thinks it is misspelled, whereas, say, Steve is not makes me happy).

For what it's worth, there's exactly one issue I know of that I consider myself socially authoritarian on, and that's naming children. I'm sorry that you feel that your creativity is stifled by not being able to name your kid Ffffffteple'qweuioand-a, but you aren't the person who has to live with that name (for what it's worth, I think I'd rather be named Ffffffteple'qweuioand-a than Neveah, though).

Upon further inspection, I discover this person is not named Neveah, but rather "Navaeh" -- meaning that not only do they have the worst name in human history, they have an intentionally misspelled "special snowflake" variant of the worst name in human history, and that I've graded a couple dozen of these tests and spelled the name wrong on all of them. "Having excellent spelling" is pretty explicitly listed as an Important Thing in the company handbook for instructors.

I then realise that the word I've been misspelling this entire time is freaking "Navaeh" and I laugh and go "whatever, my handwriting is so bad most people can't tell my a's and e's apart anyways haha" and not a single [dukar] was given.

EDIT: As for losing weight, I discovered that since that one thing that happened to me a couple weeks ago where I almost died occurred I've not eaten a lot and my weight which had been steadily climbing is going back down again. Wait, now I just realised I never mentioned that one thing that happened to me a couple weeks ago where I almost died, I should probably do that.

Forum Games / Re: What's on your Paste?
« on: March 20, 2013, 04:06:54 PM »
it's a crime to be mentally just takes a while for the punishment--not treatment--to kick in

General Chat / Re: Relationdukars
« on: March 19, 2013, 09:33:09 PM »
People care about looks more than we'd like to think. It seems most young people have had casual sex nowadays, save for the beta guys who will have to settle for relationships with formerly promiscuous women.

...formerly? They won't stop being promiscuous, they just won't be with him, that's all.

Generally it's found that people tend to eventually wind up with those at about their own attractiveness level on average anyways. I mean, you may deviate in one way or another in casual encounters, but as for relationships you tend to wind up with someone at about your level even if you're not trying for that to be.

Then of course there's the issue of "surplus males" in certain places which I think may turn out to be a much bigger problem than one would expect because of reasons that are more for the sub-forum people don't eat at. It actually makes more sense from a reproduction/survival standpoint for an individual to have a higher than 50% chance of being female but that's for yet another discussion. (I actually have read somewhere that the crappy diets we're eating nowadays are actually tricking the survival instincts of our body into thinking we're in a disaster mode, and when this happens children are actually slightly more likely to be female than usual. Conversely, if people are healthy that instinct assumes that nature is being kind and slightly more males tend to be born. Not sure how much I buy it but it sort of makes sense. But I digress)

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