The Evil Bread

[Glorb]

Aw, man. Where'd all the old Evil Bread writing staff go? I write worse than...well, worse than Ultima Shadow, at least.

[The Chef]

Good question. TBT and Hyrulean seemed to vanish without a trace, but at least we know US will be back.

[Ultima Shadow]

That, and we all know that US is the best writer out of all of us, but he isn't here.

*cough*

~~~

"One more to go," USL snarled, gazing downwards, "and right here, too."

The final Chaos Emerald, a brilliant crimson, shone in front of him, its brilliant glow lighting up the villain's features.

"Hey!" yelled a voice.

Ultimate Shadow Lord quickly turned, and saw a bizarre figure in front of him. He was blue, with several quills sticking out of the back of his head and his back. His bright green eyes were narrowed in a glare.

"Who are you?" USL snarled, fists clenching.

"I'm Sonic the Hedgehog," he replied, "and you?"

"I am Ultimate Shadow Lord," the former Knight replied, towering over the hedgehog, "and I am here to obtain the final Chaos Emerald."

"F-final?" Sonic gasped.

"That's right. Chaos Control!" USL shouted, and he disappeared.

Sonic turned quickly, but not quickly enough- an agile fist knocked him backwards, followed by a powerful kick. The hedgehog fell to the ground, but got back up, running in circles. A cyclone began to form, lifting the villain into the air. The final Chaos Emerald fell to the ground, abandoned.

"Ugh!" USL roared.

"Aha!" Sonic laughed, leaping into the air towards the villain.

"Bad move," the former knight laughed, "Chaos Spear!"

He was immediately surrounded by an arrow of Chaos energy, and darted forwards, knocking Sonic out of the air. As the cyclone disappeared, USL dropped to the ground, snickering.

"Too easy," the former knight laughed, but stopped as soon as he was hit in the back by a powerful fist.

"You're not getting that Emerald!" roared Knuckles the Echidna, picking it up.

"Chaos Control!" Ultimate Shadow Lord shouted, moving at an alarming speed.

The echidna faintly felt the Chaos Emerald disappear from his hands, and the former knight leapt back.

"Then, I shall take it by force!" he smirked, "Chaos Blast!"

A gargantuan attack, powered by Chaos energy, emanated from the villain, blasting both Sonic and Knuckles hard. Ultimate Shadow Lord quickly opened up a portal while Sonic and Knuckles were immobilised, and, bent to pick up the final Emerald- only for a black hedgehog to grab it off him. The villain let out a yell as Shadow the Hedgehog screeched to a stop in front of him, clenching the emerald tightly.

[Glorb]

Rad-tastical! You're back, US! My knowledge of the English language is kinda rusty, but here goes:

Back at wherever everyone else was, there was an audible rumble. "What in the name of crap was that?" asked Glorb. There was another rumble, this one even louder than the first, and a huge, swirly-looking swirly thing appeared in front of the crowd, emitting swirly-sounding noises. The Blue Toad approached the swirl. "Whoa, cool! A portal! I'll bet you can release some serious Cacodemons from this thing." Glorb walked up to the portal, and, with his astounding scientificated mind, thought up a brilliant plan. "I'm gonna jump in," he said out loud.
The Blue Toad gave him a strange look. "Jump in? Are you nuts? What did I just say about Cacodemons?" But before Glorb even got a chance to do anything, the portal started screeching horribly, and a whole bunch of stuff flew out. Among them were Mega Man, Gordon Freeman, that nameless, no-talking guy from Grand Theft Auto III, a zombie from Resident Evil, Master Chief, Duke Nukem, Samus Aran, Alex from River City Ransom, and Aquaman.
Hyrulian stared in disbelief. "What are you all doing here?" "...", replied the GTA3 guy. Master Chief walked up to Glorb. "Are you the one who challenged Sonic?" Glorb just sat there, stupified at meeting Master Chief, who sighed. "I guess not. The world has been majorly screwed up somehow, and the Chronosphere has been cracked open like a pinata, releasing video game characters in random places across the globe. Sonic was the first to go; we have to find him to restore that thing that I just mentioned back to its initial state to stop every universe from collapsing." And so, long story short, everyone (Hyrulian took a head count, which included Glorb, Hyrulian, The Blue Toad, the GTA3 guy, Mario, Master Chief, Wario, Duke Nukem, Alex, Samus Aran, the zombie, Peach, Mega Man, Gordon Freeman, but excluded Aquaman because he sucks) went on a quest to save the world for, like, the hundredth time.

[The Chef]

Meanwhile, Rob was still in Tomatoland, speaking with The Blue Tomato.

"....so you see, that's why we need your help" said Rob.

"Ah, I see" said the wise tomato. "So... wait a minute..."

The Blue Tomato froze.

"What's wrong?" asked Rob.

"I'm sensing.... a disturbance" said the tomato ominously

"What kind of disturbance?" inquired Rob.

"That kind that usually spells trouble and requires a hero like you to stop" said the tomato.

"Oh" Rob said. "But I'm not even a real hero yet. I'm the youngest member of the Seven Knights. I don't even have any powers!" exclaimed Rob in a fit of distress.

'You shall be a hero soon" said the tomato. "Just listen to me and listen well."

"I'm all ears" said Rob.

"You see, Lord Puppernickel has opened a hole in the Chronosphere in an attempt to find the legendary Chaos Emeralds...."

"Like from Sonic the Hedgehog?" asked Rob.

"....yes.. well, let me finish. He has sent your friend, Ultima Shadow, in his enhanced evil form, Ultimate Shadow Lord to find the emeralds."

"Uh-oh. That's not good" said Rob.

"At the same time, the rest of the Knights, who formed an alliance with the Army of the Seven Kings while you were searching for me, had just, made it to Puppernickel's lair when a hole in the Chronosphere opened up, releasing a group of beings from other universes."

"So was that the disturbance you were talking about?" asked Rob.

"Indeed. There are more of these holes appearing all over the various universes, and I fear that I am the cause."

'WHAT!?" Rob exclaimed, very shocked at this news.

"Unfortunately, my time is drawing near. I am a very old tomato, and like all tomatoes, I must pass on, and if I am gone, the universes will collapse. However, you can reverse this by restoring this universe to what it was before it happened....."

"..before what happened?" asked Rob, very tensely.

"Originally, the Knights lived in a universe of their own, but it was half-destroyed by Plotholes and then merged with the universe we currently reside in. Mario joined them, and later you, Robert"

"Oh. So do they have to ability to withstand universal collapses or something?" inquired Rob.

'Correct. And so do you..." said the tomato.

"Really!? Cool!" Rob shouted with glee.

"There's more" said the tomato. "They have that ability because they are destined to save all of the universes, and you are to stand alongside them. As of now, Ultima Shadow is currently in a universe called Mobius Prime, searching for the Chaos Emeralds under Puppernickel's command. The rest of the Knights as well as the Army of the Seven Kings are currently in front of Puppenickel's castle, standing before a large group of other-universe visitors."

"Wait, how do you know this again?" interrupted Rob.

"I am tied directly to the very fabric that reality is made of. I can see everything that is happening across all universes. If I die, the universes collapse and all life as we know will disappear forever. Your job is to restore the other Knights' former universe by reclaiming the Chaos Emeralds from Ultima Shadow and Puppernickel and plant my seed there. Then, my successor will grow and the universes will be safe."

"How can I ever hope to do that?" said Rob angrily. "I'm just an ordinary human kid."

"First you must reunite with the other other Knights. From there, you must tell them to hold off Puppernickel as long as possible while you retrive the last emerald before Ultima Shadow can get it. He already holds six of them. As long as the last one is safe, his plan will be disrupted. Hide it here in my abode. I will take care of it."

"OK. So what about the other emeralds?" asked Rob.

"Eventually you must face Puppernickel as an official Knight, but to do that, you must go through the rite of passage."

'Is this anything like Luke training with Yoda on Dagobah?"  Rob asked sarcastically.

'Somewhat." said the tomato. "You must seek the one known as Deezer. He will train you for seven days. Throughout those seven says, a war between the other-universe beings (led by the Knights and the Seven Kings), and the Evil Bread (led by Puppernickel) will wage."

"That sounds dangerous. Are you sure I'll be able to complete it in time?" asked Rob, worried.

"I trust in you. The prophecy will come true. After your training is complete, you will finally be able to cast down Ultima Shadow and Puppernickel soon after, in order to obtain the Chaos Emeralds. With them in hand, recite these words:

By the will of the Blue Tomato, I restore the universe of the Five Knights of TMK. Chaos Restore.

Doing so will restore the universe to it's former glory, in which you must take this seed of mine and plant it in a safe spot" the old tomato said, handing Rob a blue tomato seed.

"OK, is that all that has to be done? Is that my duty as a hero?" asked Rob, very curiously.

"Yes, but I must warn you of the Plotholes. They are what destroyed their universe to begin with. You must avoid them at all costs. Also remember than my time is running out. If you fail to complete your mission within those seven days, I will wither away and life as we know it will be gone forever. Is that clear, young Robert?"

"Definitely. I will not fail, Blue Tomato. You can count on me." said Rob, courageously.

"Very well. Now go. 'Tis time to start your journey." said the old tomato.

With that, Rob went off in the direction of Puppenickel's castle, unaware of the battle between SushieBoy and the Mysterious Figure also happening at that time....

Will Rob complete his training in time? Will the Knights, the Seven Kings and the characters from all over the multiverse hold their own in the war against Puppernickel? Will Ultimate Shadow Lord find the last Chaos Emerald? Will SushieBoy fend off the Mysterious Figure? Who is the Mysterious Figure anyway? find out on the next installmen of The New Evil Bread Legend!!!

(Just thought I'd tie up a few loose ends with this one. Try not to take it too off-course, okay guys?)

[Ultima Shadow]

Glorb, I'm not actually back... but just doing nothing and getting hassled by local shopkeepers isn't exactly the most exciting thing in the world. I needed to write something. xD

(I thought USL already obtained the final Emerald..? Ah, no matter... *edits post*)

~~~

"Ugh!" USL bellowed, "come back here with that Chaos Emerald!"

The black hedgehog turned, his hate-filled eyes glaring at the former knight.

"I hold six Chaos Emeralds," the villain laughed, "and you hold one. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that you're toast."

Shadow gritted his teeth, trying to think of a way out of the situation. It was obvious that USL could easily destroy him while barely breaking a sweat... there had to be another way...

"You... you killed Sonic!"

A purple blur darted through the air, landing quickly beside Shadow. A plothole was behind the creature, spinning rapidly. The newcomer halted, her yellow eyes glaring at the villain.

"Who are you?" snarled Shadow.

"My name is Blaze the Cat," she replied, "I am the guardian of the Sol Emeralds! I'm here to help, Shadow!"

Shadow didn't bother trying to guess what a Sol Emerald was or how she knew his name, but instead glared at USL as well.

"How can you help?" USL laughed, "you're as powerless as Shadow here."

"Wanna bet?" Blaze retorted, smirking slightly.

The purple cat leapt into the air, held aloft by flames. Out of nowhere, seven plate-like objects began to rotate around her, now just a rainbow blur. Suddenly, they all moved inwards, and she was bathed in a white light. Blaze was then surrounded by flames, and she landed, glowing with fire dancing around her. The guardian's fur was now a light orange colour.

"That's... Chaos energy?" Shadow gasped.

"Not quite," Blaze smirked, launching a fireball at Ultimate Shadow Lord, who quickly evaded the attack.

"The Sol Emeralds give me the ability to turn into Burning Blaze," she muttered, "much like the Chaos Emeralds do to you, Shadow."

Suddenly, a fist collided with the side of her head, and USL jumped back, charging up a Chaos Spear.

"Shadow!" Blaze cried, "take the Chaos Emerald and get through the portal! Quickly!"

Nodding, the black hedgehog looked at the portal- it was already closing. Casting one last look at the battered and bruised Sonic and Knuckles, he jumped through the portal, Chaos Emerald still in his hand.

~~~

btw, for those who don't know, Blaze is actually a canonical character; from Sonic Rush.

[Glorb]

Back at the cave everyone else was in (trust me...it was a cave...), Glorb was in front of a chalkboard with several doodles on it, while he paced back and forth as everyone else watched not-so-eagerly. "That's it!" yelled Glorb, "I've found it! My scietifical calulatories calculate that, to stop Ultimate Shadow Lord from getting the three Super Jewel whatchathingamabooberwhatevers, I myself must turn evil to get them back." This was followed by some murmuring in the crowd.

Gordon Freeman piped up, but said nothing, because he was born without any vocal cords. Instead, Mega Man began saying something. "Glorb, if you turn evil and get the Emeralds, then won't you be unstoppable and destroy the crops and everything?" But it was too late, for Glorb had already transformed into the most monstrous, vile being of pure, evil darkness and evil...Dark, uh, Glorb!

Draped in a Wal-Mart Dracula Halloween costume cape and wearing a doofy-looking metal helmet, gray sweatshirt with "DG" spraypainted on, neon-orange hotpants, dark sunglasses and faux-snakeskin boots (because Dark Glorb, evil as he may be, was environmentally conscious, and because they were cheaper), Dark Glorb was a visage of pure menace. With an evil laugh, he jumped into his jet-black, jet-powered 1975 Ford Pacemaker and drove off into the night, in search of the Chaos Emeralds...

[The Chef]

So while Glorb went off to do his thing, the other Knights and the rest of the characters took matters into their own hands...

"Gentlemen..." said Mario. "It is time we finished this feud with the Evil Bread once and for all. We shall fight in the name of all that is good and pure! Rob, Ultima Shadow and Glorb might be separate from us, but wherever they are, their honor will be avenged! Who's with me!?"

"WE ARE!!" yelled The Blue Toad, Hyrulean and Masher.

"SO ARE WE!!"shouted Bowser Jr., Wart, Tatanga, Wario, Waluigi and Popple.

"DITTO!!" cried the enormous crowd of characters from various universes, which included MegaMan and Gordon Freeman.

So they all gathered into an army and marched toward Puppernickel's castle.

Meanwhile at the path towards the Bread Kingdom...

"Man, my legs are killin' me" groaned Rob.

Will the Knight's army win the war against Puppernickel? Will Rob get there to tell them the words of the Blue Tomato and make in back in time for his training with Deezer? Will Shadow escape with the last Emerald? Will Glorb ever remember the way the story is heading and stop adding stupid crap to it? Find out next time!

[Ultima Shadow]

Just lost a huge post... meh... and Undo didn't work...

~~~

Blaze launched a fiery beam at USL, who leapt upwards, doing a backflip before landing on a rock. She quickly followed up with a fireball, which the villain deflected with a Chaos Spear. However, Blaze leapt into the air, flames gathering around her feet, before darting downwards, blazing fully. USL had no time to stop, and was hit head-on by the attack.

"Ha," the queen smirked.

Ultimate Shadow Lord jumped into the air, surrounded by Chaos energy, and darted downwards in a similar manner. He hit Blaze, who stumbled as well.

"Ha," he mimicked, "Chaos Control!"

USL disappeared, and quickly reappeared next to Blaze, delivering a devastating uppercut to the cat. She went soaring into the air, but regained her composure, summoning a pillar of fire to shoot of the ground. Swearing softly, USL dashed forward, as the pillar erupted behind him. The villain continued to run, fire chasing after him. Blaze began to descend gradually as the flames scorched after the former knight, and she threw her hands up. A larger pillar shot out of the ground, straight in front of the villain. USL quickly aimed a Chaos Blast at the ground, using the propulsion to leap over the fiery attack. Blaze sent the pillar back into the ground, and saw the former knight standing there, grinning.

"What now?" USL smirked, "Chaos Control!"

Blaze threw her hands up just as the villain darted forward, and a tower of flame appeared in front fo him. USL collided with it, and was sent directly upwards. Blaze leapt into the air, charging a fireball- but, suddenly, fell to the ground, fireball disappearing. Her fur returned to its regular purple.

"Wh-what?!" she gasped.

"You need rings to retain your form," USL smirked, still hovering but now charging up an attack, "remember?"

"He's right," Blaze said to herself.

"Of course. Chaos Screw!"

The villain dashed downwards, spinning rapidly and surrounded by Chaos energy. Blaze could only watch as the former Knight slammed into her, sending her flying. Ultimate Shadow Lord came to a stop, picking up all seven Sol Emeralds.

"Too easy," he grinned, as Blaze lay groaning a few metres away.

"Stop! Leave her alone!"

Dashing towards the villain, preparing for a fight, were a wide variety of heroes- Amy, Cream, Tails, Mighty, Vector, Espio, Rouge, Charmy and Silver. USL got into a combat pose, smirking at the newcomers.

~~~

Shadow leapt out of the portal, landing roughly on a rock. An army of bizarre beige creatures were storming over a sort of battlefield. Looking down at the chaos, he saw two warriors, bravely fighting off the army. Grasping the Chaos Emerald, Shadow darted downwards, spinning into a ball and tearing through the ranks of the enemy. Creature after creature went flying, and Shadow came to a stop, leaping backwards next to one of the warriors. He was short, wore blue clothes and had a turban-like hat on his head. The warrior nodded thankfully.

"Thanks," he smiled, "I'm Blue Toad, and my friend is Luigi Simpson. Who are you?"

~~~

Has Shadow really gone back in time? Can the combined forces of the remaining Sonic characters defeat the hyper-powered Ultimate Shadow Lord? Can Rob succeed in training? And will I stop asking these questions? Find out in the next episode of... THE NEW EVIL BREAD LEGEND! =D =D =D

[The Chef]

(What time period did Shadow go back to? It couldn't be the old universe because that was destroyed, yet US is there in his Luigi Simpson form. What gives?)[/outofcharacter]

[Glorb]

Will Glorb ever remember the way the story is heading and stop adding stupid crap to it?

What's that supposed to mean? I started this story, y'know! And besides, I remember perfectly well where the story was heading! Something about hotpants, right?

[The Chef]

(Glorb, seriously. I know you started it, but you're not doing a very good job of helping the rest of us to finish it... in style.)[/outofcharacter]

[Ultima Shadow]

OOC: Shadow went back in time, to before that universe was destroyed. Forgive me, I don't know much about time travel, having never accomplished it myself. xD

I'd post more, but I only have 5 minutes left of net time. =(

[The Chef]

(Ah I'll take your word for it. I was kinda thinking that each universe had it's own time stream and the destruction of that universe caused it's history to be erased from existence.)

[Glorb]

Well, time travel and interdimensional travel are two different things, but I'd say that since time and space are separate, a destroyed universe's timeline would still be preserved in some sort of cosmic "recently deleted universes" dimension, or something.