I appreciate all your thoughts.
I'm extremely fearful of screwing things up because I'm trying to pull myself out of my not-very-sociable life into a more sociable life. Not to say I was nerdy or anything, but it's the people who over-excel at literally everything that kinda drove me into the "hey... just... a normal, quiet kid. pretty cool" category. I'm a funny guy, but I'm guess I'm not "jocky" enough to really act immature, but have people react to it in a positive, humorous way.
There could be friends of mine acting like friggin' idiots, and guys and girls alike just eat it all up, but if I were to try the same [darn] thing, I'd be met with "lol
what in the hell is this kid's problem?" As a result, I tend to be a lot quieter because a lot of people don't want to just talk and BS about stuff; they want laughs only, and I have no material for those peoples' types of humor (and don't want any because it's childish, retarded humor). Also, since I was never the "act like a moron" guy growing up, I can't suddenly just start doing it one day because everyone I know doesn't know me as that kind of person.
Let me make an analogy: I'm like a King of the Hill kind of person. I like small-group based things. I'm the kid who'd grab a beer saying "yeeeep" and talk about
things ... you know, have a good time BSin' with people. The other people, the "laughs only" kind of people (that being the only kind of people I know), are the type that want to party with hundreds of people and see who can have sex/pass out from being drunk the fastest, and I'm not that type of kid at all.
Every time I talk about this I think of it as a whole and I'm just kinda like.... "ughh... you know what? forget it, i just dont even wanna get into it at all."