Author Topic: Relationdukars (Read 94466 times)

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #225 on:** April 30, 2013, 09:35:39 PM »

Quote from: I am hello on April 30, 2013, 08:24:01 PM

Friends=good. Crush turned friend= WHY?

Because they're just like any other friend in that they might not be attracted to you?

Weegee · « **Reply #226 on:** April 30, 2013, 10:38:54 PM »

It's soul-crushing. You can't blame him for not wanting to hang around with her anymore.

Turtlekid1 · « **Reply #227 on:** April 30, 2013, 11:52:51 PM »

Friendzoned: because "consolation prize" is exactly what her friendship is going to feel like if that's just happened.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #228 on:** May 01, 2013, 10:10:10 AM »

Quote from: Weegee on April 30, 2013, 10:38:54 PM

It's soul-crushing. You can't blame him for not wanting to hang around with her anymore.

And it's not hurtful to her that he wants to end their friendship just because she doesn't want to be intimate with him?

Tavros · « **Reply #229 on:** May 01, 2013, 11:45:38 AM »

I have no intentions of ending our friendship, guys.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #230 on:** May 01, 2013, 12:19:01 PM »

Good, so you're not just a lousy Nice Guy™.

Markio · « **Reply #231 on:** May 01, 2013, 01:35:24 PM »

Wouldn't it be worse if someone wanted to end a friendship and then didn't? Their relationship would become a dishonest charade. Even though it may be shallow to stop hanging out with someone because they turn you down, at least the person bailing out is being straightforward about their motives.

Not that this is referring to IAH's situation; this has reached Level Hypothetical.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #232 on:** May 01, 2013, 04:29:44 PM »

You got me there, I just think it's a stupid reason not to be someone's friend. Can't force a person to feel a different way, I guess.

Weegee · « **Reply #233 on:** May 01, 2013, 05:11:32 PM »

It's usually that you develop feelings for them, not that you only befriended them in hopes of dating them.

Luigison · « **Reply #234 on:** May 01, 2013, 06:12:23 PM »

IMHO if you are friendzoned and don't speak up about your lust/attraction/affection/love then you are rightfully friendzoned whether you are male or female. You can't just expect the other person to make the first move in fear of being let down or friendzoned and then be upset about it. Declare your intentions. Then you will either be well rewarded or have a right to be upset.

PaperLuigi · « **Reply #235 on:** May 01, 2013, 06:14:39 PM »

Quote from: Weegee on May 01, 2013, 05:11:32 PM

It's usually that you develop feelings for them, not that you only befriended them in hopes of dating them.

I don't recall saying such a distinction mattered (although the latter is a truly retarded reason for being someone's friend). If you develop feelings for them and they're not returned, fine, take a step back to heal if you have to. But don't just flat out stop being their friend forever. The feelings of the other person do matter (surprising, right?) even if they only go so far as friendship. Learn to let [dukar] go, Jesus.

Quote from: Luigison on May 01, 2013, 06:12:23 PM

Then you will either be well rewarded or have a right to be upset.

And whatever you do don't be upset at them. It's not their fault they're not attracted to you.

Ninjap00 · « **Reply #236 on:** May 14, 2013, 06:42:35 PM »

how do i grils

Markio · « **Reply #237 on:** May 15, 2013, 12:10:18 PM »

hav patients

Luigison · « **Reply #238 on:** May 15, 2013, 03:07:59 PM »

Quote from: PaperLuigi on May 01, 2013, 06:14:39 PM

And whatever you do don't be upset at them. It's not their fault they're not attracted to you.

Yes. I meant that your feelings would be justified, not that you'd have the right to take it out on them. Thanks for the clarification.

Tavros · « **Reply #239 on:** May 16, 2013, 12:53:05 PM »

My crush is now dating my bi (formerly gay) friend. I is sad.