Author Topic: The Hero's Blood  (Read 14473 times)

« on: April 26, 2003, 10:38:04 PM »
As I mentioned in the "The Prophecy" topic, I have a fanfic of my own to post, well actually the end is not complete and I am decifering it from my sandskrit-ish handwriting. This is also my first story that I have ever posted anywhere so I ask that ya'll be gentle with your resposes. Uhhh... without further ado...

               The Hero's Blood

"When all the light has faded, and all hope seems lost, a single glimmer of light shines through the darkness, and a hero shall emerge."

Prelude to Disaster

    Luigi woke with a slight scream. A disturbing dream of a desolate wasteland that was strangly familiar had woken him. From across the room, Mario uttered something about sleep and began to snore softly.
(By the way, * means a person is thinking:D )

    *That's the third night in a row,* Luigi thought to himself,* I should write this down.*

    Creeping down the stairs, Luigi jumped at a creaking sound. It was the floorboard. *I must still be jumpy from that dream.* He tried to calm down as he entered the kitchen.

    He pulled back the rug to reveal the door to his sanctuary, the basement. Here he kept his diary, containing his most private thoughts, his secret feelings, and most of all, his fears. Flipping through the many pages he finally reached the last entry.* Dear Diary*, he thought as he wrote, * I had that dream again. The one where everything was destroyed and everybody was gone. Tonight, it was somewhat different, as it was ending, an erie echoing voice said the words "Hero's Blood." What does my dream mean? Why am I having this same dream? I am afraid.*

     Those last words he wrote sent a chill down his spine. He went back to bed, but something was amiss. Writing in his diary usually soothed his nerves, but tonight he was gripped by a foreboding feeling that something terrible was going to happen, as those words,"Hero's Blood" echoed through his mind.

So there's the first part of my story, let me know what you think. If you like it, tell me and I'll post more. If you think its flakey, tell me and I'll post anyway. HAHAHA, being in control is sweet.( cricket chirps ) uhhh... anyway this is my story, so I hope you like it.:D

p.s. When I gave my teaser in "The Prophecy" topic, I said hope again instead of light D'oh!

I''m not lazy, I''m just... uh...

Edited by - Bluto on 4/26/2003 11:21:28 PM
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!


  • June 14-16, every year
« Reply #1 on: April 27, 2003, 12:09:51 AM »
Sweet!  Another fan fic!

« Reply #2 on: April 27, 2003, 12:35:18 AM »
Yay! My first reply, Now I'll try to be as cosistant as possible with posting but it might be a few days between postings because I have a job and a serious relationship with the most beautiful person in the world( to me anyways), so anyways, I have decided to do some dedications.

To Crystal: For being supportive and putting up with me.

To Dairy King: For pointing out every grammatical mistake I make.

To Sapphira: For inspiring me to finish this story and for giving me the courage(EEK!) to post it.

To Hirocon: For being the first to reply to my topic.

Uhhhh... thats all for now.
More posting soon, I hope.^_^

I''m not lazy, I''m just... uh...
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!

« Reply #3 on: April 27, 2003, 01:12:10 AM »
Bluto, I just finished reading(well.. What I could make out) your story. Wow... Thats one good story. Eee Hee hee!! I love having a brother who is the starter of this! I could spoil everything, but that would just be down right mean-iriffic of me. So.. Stick around and read it! Its really suspenseful! It'll leave you sittin' on the edge of your seat screamin' "OH GOD!! PLEASE HAVE HIM POST THE NEXT PART SOON!!!" Really. (By the way, he didn't pay me to say all those nice things about it.)

I am poetry in motion. You are gibberish in neutral.
More shtick than you can shake a stick at.


  • Inquiring
« Reply #4 on: April 27, 2003, 09:57:15 AM »
You're welcome! Wow! A dedication to me! Thank you! ^_^

Anyway, your story sounds GREAT so far! I'm glad you decided to post it afterall! Please continue!

If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
"The surest way to happiness is to lose yourself in a cause greater than yourself."

« Reply #5 on: April 27, 2003, 10:02:46 AM »
Hey, this is one great fanfic! Post some more soon.

What is wrong with this guy?
...Besides everything!

« Reply #6 on: April 27, 2003, 11:04:10 AM »
*Squeels in delight* Yes! People like it!, I try to post at least Ch 1 today, my whole family get together on Sundays and me and my older brother usually do something to our cars. Today's task is hook up an Amp and maybe tint the windows(which will make me feel cool ^_^!) Sorry, I was rambling again, so anyhoo, thanks for your support! More to come soon!

Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!

« Reply #7 on: April 27, 2003, 12:51:37 PM »
Okee Dokee everybody, since everbody so far has showed support and interest, I am more than thrilled to post. I just wish I could retype my handwriting faster.
Ch 1
The Invitation
    Luigi rose from his bed around sunrise being unable to sleep. His dream still playing over and over in his head. He made himself a cup of herbal tea to sip while watching the sunrise. This was one of his favorite moments of the day. From the kitchen window, you could see the sun cast an orange glow around Peach’s castle, then slowly rise over the castle wall to shine its light across the rest of the Mushroom Kingdom.*What a beautiful day it will be.* he thought smiling.
     After the sun had risen, Luigi started to make breakfast.* I wish for once Mario could wake up early enough to help.* He was always the clean one of the brothers. His things were always neat and organized and Mario’s were usually more or less tossed about the house in small piles. *Oh goody, more to clean up*. About this time he heard Mario coming down the stairs.” Good morning Mario, it sure is a nice day, isn’t it?” Luigi waited for response. “ Huh, oh yeah, good morning.” Mario yawned back.
   There was a knock at the door.” Oh boy, can I get it please?” Luigi sarcastically muttered as he opened the door, to find Peach sanding on the front step.
“ Good morning Luigi.”
“Good morning Peach.”
“Peach?” Mario’s ears perked up at the sound of  her name.
He dashed for the doorway nearly knocking Luigi down in the process.
    “Hi Peach!” Mario cheerfully said, sliding to a stop beside Luigi, “You look beautiful as always this morning.” he said gazing into her soft, blue eyes.
    “ Thank you.” she replied, blushing slightly. For a moment they just stood there,they were completely entranced by one another, as if everything else disappeared and they were the only two people in the universe. They were in love, they were happy, and that was all that mattered.
   â€œSo what brings you here?” Luigi asked,  feeling a little left out.
   â€œOh yeah, I almost forgot why I came. I’m having a party this evening to watch tonight’s meteor shower, and I came by to drop off  an invitation for you guys.”
    “We’ll be there Peach, it’ll be great!”
    “You will? Oh Mario, you’re so sweet. Well, I’ll see you tonight.” She gave Mario a little peck on the cheek causing him to blush, waved to Luigi, and was on her way.
    Luigi thought about telling Mario about his dream, but Mario was too excited to listen” I’m gonna get ready right now!” Mario dashed up the stairs to get changed.
    *I’ll just wait until tomorrow to tell him. I don’t want to spoil his day.*  Luigi thought to himself returning to breakfast. He had forgotten about the dream and was thinking about the party. He hoped that Daisy would be there. He smiled as he thought about her. Many times he had talked with her and always had a wonderful time. She had a certain aura of inocence and kindness that he found irresistible He often wanted to express his feelings about her, but he never could build up the courage to do so.* Hopefully I can have the courage tonight.*

Stay tuned for Ch 2 to becoming soon. I'll try to post it as quickly as possible, but I may be limited by work and sleep, if only I could win the lottery.

Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!

Insane Steve

  • Professional Cynic
« Reply #8 on: April 27, 2003, 01:52:48 PM »
You've done a good job thus far! Seeing this, I am definately going to post my fanfic today. (Or, the first chapter, anyways)

I only see one minor thing you can do to make it better... In my opinion, your chapters are a bit short... Of course, if that's your style, so be it.

Well done thus far! I can't wait to see the continuing of it!

Congratulations! You have just been blessed by the wisdom of Steve.


  • Inquiring
« Reply #9 on: April 27, 2003, 02:41:46 PM »
Hey, sounds enticing so far! Keep up the good work and keep posting, too! :)

(Hey, isn't that weird? In "The Prophecy" Luigi makes that same comment when the door rings. Heheh...Poor Luigi, always overlooked.)

If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
"The surest way to happiness is to lose yourself in a cause greater than yourself."

« Reply #10 on: April 28, 2003, 12:33:39 PM »
Thanks to everybody for reading so far. I know the first couple of chapters are a little short, but the later chapters are more lenghty because there will be more dialouge and action. I tried to work on this more yesterday but that stupid amp I was putting in my car caused us problems all day long. Ugg. I doubt I'll get to post chapter 2 tonight( Ahhh, too many to's in one sentence) but I will most definently tomorrow.

...and if you read this Sapphira, please know that I am dying to read your next chapter. ^_^

Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!


  • Inquiring
« Reply #11 on: April 28, 2003, 12:47:07 PM »
I'm working on it... The changes in my last chapter REALLY effect the next one, so it's gonna take a while. I'll try to finish it this week, and hopefully sooner.

If things don''t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
"The surest way to happiness is to lose yourself in a cause greater than yourself."

« Reply #12 on: April 29, 2003, 04:54:25 PM »
Sorry everybody, my life got busy and I will try to get chapter two up tonight.  After you read it, if you feel like it, tell me what you liked or didn't like or what you think will happen. I would rather get 10 people telling me their opinions and clogging up my topic than nobody posting, and leaving me to wonder what everyone thinks. Sorry for delays, must... keep... tying... story!

Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!

« Reply #13 on: April 29, 2003, 06:27:24 PM »
This was going to be the post but the bad grammer fairy hit me over the head. Had to fix some words that were spelled funni.(he he)

Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!

Edited by - Bluto on 4/29/2003 5:33:33 PM
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!

« Reply #14 on: April 29, 2003, 06:27:52 PM »
Now, the moment you have been waiting for has finally arrived, CHAPTER 2 !!!( waits for appluase)... sorry, got a little excited.Ahem, anyways, here we go.
Ch 2
An Invitation For Evil
.............................................Peach had finished passing out her invitations and was returning to her castle to see how the decorations were coming along. She let her mind wander as she walked.

*I hope Mario likes the special cake I‘m baking for him. Oh, of course he will. I can just see it now, the sunset, Mario by my side, the meteor shower, then the fireworks. I just hope everything is perfect!*

Not paying attention to what she was doing, Peach dropped an extra invitation she had been carrying on the ground. Not far away, a koopa scout that Bowser had sent to observe the princess noticed the small piece of paper she had dropped. After making sure he was out of Peach’s sight, he quickly grabbed the paper and re-hid himself in the bushes to read the paper.
The invitation read:

   You have been formally invited to a party at my castle to watch the meteor shower tonight. There will dinner, dessert, and a fireworks display after the show. I hope you will attend.

“King Bowser will be most pleased with this,” the koopa exclaimed, ” this could be my ticket into the para-troopa division!”

Back at her castle, Peach started preparing for the party. She made out the list of her invited guests, had her servants put up the decorations, set out the tables and chairs on the patio facing towards Shooting Star Summit, and put place markers on the tables. She had her chefs start preparing the pasta.

“Mario’s favorite, of course,” she told them, and she baked her special cake for him. ”I can’t wait, this is going to be perfect!”

The koopa arrived at Bowser’s Keep, the home of Bowser, king of the koopas. The guards noticed the scout’s uniform and lowered the drawbridge over the moat of lava.
The scout met up with Bowser in the testing grounds he use for his newly developed weapons.

 â€œ My lord, I have something you should see.”

“What is it!?!” yell Bowser, “I am extremely busy, so it better be important!”

The scout, terrified by Bowser’s reaction, handed him the invitation with a shaky hand.
A twisted smirk crossed over his face as the evil dictator read the letter.

“This is the perfect chance to continue my quest to take over the Mushroom Kingdom. Ready my copter, we’ve got a party to attend, and we mustn't be late. Good work scout!”

Bowser began to leave, when the scout spoke up.

“ liege? he managed to stammer out, “ I was w...wondering if you could consider letting me join the para-troopas as reward for my good work.”

Bowser pondered this for a moment, and replied, “For your excellent work, I will make you the captain of the para-troopas...”

The scout was ecstatic.

“...IF..., “

The scout froze. ” If, sire?”

“...if my plan works. If it doesn’t, I’ll feed you to the piranha plants! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!”

*Peach’s party was only a few hours away,* Bowser thought as he prepared for his attack,*and this party is going to have fireworks, one way or another!*

There it is, let me know what you think, give predictions, give thoughts, write away right away(he he,thats sounds the same but is spelt different^_^ )

Spill the blood of the innocent!!! Then clean it before it makes a mess!

Edited by - Bluto on 4/29/2003 5:30:05 PM
Like a sponge, thirsty I am!