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Author Topic: The Silly Mario Fan Theories Thread  (Read 128567 times)

« Reply #495 on: August 31, 2015, 02:04:35 AM »
And now, the motherlode.
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The Chef

  • Simon Cowell
« Reply #496 on: August 31, 2015, 03:07:43 AM »
So I take it "lore" now means "random funny or weird obscure images"?

« Reply #497 on: August 31, 2015, 12:10:27 PM »
Are you going to complain every few posts in this thread?
Kinopio is the ultimate video game character! Who else can drive a kart, host parties, play tennis, give good advice and items, and is almost always happy??

BP

  • Beside Pacific
« Reply #498 on: August 31, 2015, 01:02:23 PM »
I can't be the only one who saw the caged thwomp in MK64 and thought, "It looks green because of the lighting, as many things can appear to be different colors under different light, and it's behind bars to add scenery, much like the billboards everywhere or the penguin stranded on the ice floe in Sherbet Land" like even at age 7, right? Not only did I not imagine something was special about it on my own, but any time I got to spend on the Internet was usually spent looking for cheatcodes and glitches, for every game I owned, and I never heard anything about playable green thwomps. I'm not saying it's implausible that enough people would think there was something significant about it and a popular foregone conclusion couldn't have grown from it, as popular untrue methods to deal with the truck and get Mew in Red and Blue exist, and there are plenty of rumors involving that star statue in the courtyard being the key to unlocking Luigi in SM64. But I'm pretty sure there was nothing about that thwomp going around at all until recently.

Is the green thwomp thing something that started with one guy who was like "I always thought it was special and tried to unlock it!" and a bunch of people lied "Yes, I too was a child who played this game once and spent time thinking about that instead of driving around Peach's Castle's couryard! Oh the nostalgia!" until it became a meme, with everyone convincing themselves it was a big childhood mystery that they and only they missed out on, when in reality it is a recent idea?
All your dreeeeeeams begiiin to shatterrrrrr~
It's YOUR problem!

BriGuy92

  • Luck of the Irish
« Reply #499 on: August 31, 2015, 01:21:19 PM »
I remember thinking it was an interesting scenery touch, and not much more than that. The first time I saw it, I assumed that this particular thwomp must have misbehaved or something, or else why would Bowser have put it in a cage?

My cousin told me that "something happened" if I rammed into its cage as fast as I could. Turned out the only thing that happened was I fell back to seventh or eighth place and my cousin got to laugh at me.
Know the most important contribution of the organ Fund science girls type. It's true!

The Chef

  • Simon Cowell
« Reply #500 on: August 31, 2015, 01:34:03 PM »
I distinctly remember seeing the web page where the hoax originated years ago, but despite my best efforts I cannot find it again. All I was able to find was this video, presumably uploaded by the same hoaxer. Note the upload date of April 1st, 2007. At the time I didn't really think much of it, despite seeing a smattering of forum posts on sites similar to TMK from people who believed the hoax. Since the source of the gag is gone, I honestly have no idea how it's become this much of a meme. In my attempts to find the page I keep seeing people who seriously think that Thwomp's name really is "Marty".

As for me, as a kid I definitely knew he wasn't green, but I always assumed he was behind the cage for a reason. I guess I must've figured he came out of the cage on a higher difficulty and then somehow my brain rearranged this into a "fact" after years of not playing Mario Kart 64.

Edit: Well, after a fair bit of searching I finally found this, which appears to be a reprint of the text on the aforementioned web page and even provides a link to the hoaxer's original website: http://www.magikoopa.com/marty/ which unfortunately is completely gone now. It says that the hoax specifically originated on a GameFAQs thread asking about the green Thwomp, which then sort of ballooned into an elaborate hoax perpetuated by three named individuals, including the aforementioned hoaxer. No idea how long ago this happened. The YouTube video is the earliest evidence I can find.
« Last Edit: August 31, 2015, 02:17:56 PM by The Chef »

« Reply #501 on: September 02, 2015, 07:10:02 PM »
Here's Bird Person saying the caged Thwomp is green because of the light nine years ago:

The "green" one is probably green due to a glow.

« Reply #502 on: September 02, 2015, 07:27:32 PM »
A free Thwomp leaps
on the back of the wind
and floats downstream
till the current ends
and dips his spike
in the orange sun rays
and dares to claim the sky.

But a Thwomp that stalks
down his narrow cage
can seldom see through
his bars of rage
his spikes are clipped and
his body is bound
so he opens his throat to grunt.

The caged Thwomp grunts
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged Thwomp
grunts of freedom.

The free Thwomp thinks of another breeze
and the trade winds soft through the sighing trees
and the fat plumbers waiting on a dawn bright lawn
and he names the sky his own

But a caged Thwomp stands on the grave of dreams
his shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
his spikes are clipped and his body is bound
so he opens his throat to grunt.

The caged Thwomp grunts
with a fearful trill   
of things unknown   
but longed for still   
and his tune is heard   
on the distant hill   
for the caged Thwomp
grunts of freedom.


I Know Why The Caged Thwomp Grunts, by Lizard Dude

The Chef

  • Simon Cowell
« Reply #503 on: September 02, 2015, 07:29:49 PM »
Apparently it's possible to glitch your way past the cage in the Japanese release via moon jump code, and it looks like that little alcove is tinted green. It doesn't seem to affect the player's spite, unless that's an emulator bug.

BP

  • Beside Pacific
« Reply #504 on: September 03, 2015, 12:44:31 AM »
Here's Bird Person saying the caged Thwomp is green because of the light nine years ago:

Nice memory. The earliest talk about the green thwomp I could dig up with Google was from 2007, already older than I expected (I didn't dig that much though, I got stuff to do), but I guess it must have been around even longer than that. But I still think the belief that it was special or was hiding something wasn't as common as is reported and is more of something the internet created.
All your dreeeeeeams begiiin to shatterrrrrr~
It's YOUR problem!

The Chef

  • Simon Cowell
« Reply #505 on: September 03, 2015, 03:39:33 AM »
Like I said, the hoax apparently went up in 2007. I guess part of the reason it's a meme now is because it's kinda hard to fully debunk the myth with the hoaxer's website dead and gone.


The Chef

  • Simon Cowell
« Reply #507 on: September 09, 2015, 01:51:31 PM »
I bet that's totally in no way related to the current trend of deciding every kids franchise should be "deeper" than necessary.

I also expect either flagrant disappointment at how vague his answers are, or flagrant rage at how his answers didn't line up with what people wanted.

It'd be hilarious (and kinda frustrating) if his answers were straight-up culled from people on the Internet, but I don't think that's likely.

« Reply #508 on: September 10, 2015, 10:36:20 AM »
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uu2DnTd3dEo" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uu2DnTd3dEo</a>

All yes-or-no questions.
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The Chef

  • Simon Cowell
« Reply #509 on: September 10, 2015, 12:31:44 PM »
To summarize:

1. Mario is named after Mario Segale (as if Deezer didn't already do a good job proving that).
2. Mario is not about to die on the NES 'Super Mario Bros.' box art.
3. Miyamoto would not let Dr. Mario operate on him.
4. Mario 3 really is "just a performance" (whatever that means, and with 'Mario All-Stars' and 'Mario Advance 4' still left unaccounted for).
5. Bob-ombs do not turn into Boos when they die.
6. Apparently Miyamoto considers himself to be Bowser Jr.'s mother! (Can't wait to see people take this literally!)
7. Mario does break blocks with his fists.
8. None of Miyamoto's courses are in 'Super Mario Maker'.

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