You're fighting a MagiMechTech MechaMech
This is a big robot that's powered by a sinister blend of magic and technology. Since sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic, though, you're not sure in what proportion.
You get the jump on it.
Gonald calmly walks up to your opponent and hits it in the kneecaps with a short stick, leaving it looking a little unsteady. "That one was on the house, kid."
Use Item -> Goodfella contract
Gonald looks over the contract. "That will be 99 Meat," he says, holding out a wing. You hand over the Meat.
He viciously clubs your opponent in the back of the head with a baseball bat, dealing 70 damage.
He nods in your direction, saying "Pleasure doing business with you, kid."
Your Jalapeño Saucesphere does 1 damage to your opponent, and infuses you with renewed health.
You gain 1 hit point.
Your Jabañero Saucesphere does 3 damage to your opponent, and infuses you with renewed energy.
You gain 3 Muscularity Points.
It fires a torpedo at you. A pink torpedo. KAWAIII!! I mean, OW! Eek! Ow! Ouch! Ugh!
You lose 11 hit points.
Use Item -> Goodfella contract
Gonald looks over the contract. "That will be 99 Meat," he says, holding out a wing. You hand over the Meat.
He then marches up to your opponent and shouts "What does donotcare95 look like?
What... does
donotcare95... look... like?" while repeatedly hitting it with a bat for 107 damage.
He nods in your direction, saying "Pleasure doing business with you, kid."
You win the fight!
You acquire an item: metallic A
Gonald smiles, and says "You have brought honor to the family."
You gain 32 Strongness.
You gain 9 Magicalness.
You gain 7 Cheek.