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Author Topic: You'll Laugh When You See This!!  (Read 7664 times)

Markio

  • Normal
« on: November 08, 2003, 10:00:53 PM »
OK, just post jokes.  Everything that everyone writes nowadays is either serious or taken seriously.  Er... just post jokes!Here's a few of mine:

How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two.  One to screw it in, and one to not screw it in.

How many women with PMS does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Six.
Why?
It just does, OK?

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two.  One to hold the giraffe and the other to put clocks in the bathtub.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Sixteen.  One to screw it in and the others to form a support group.

How many dull people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One.

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, but only if the lightbulb wants to change.

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side.

Is there another word for synonym?

Shouldn't there be a smaller word for "monosyllabic"?

Never slam a door.  Doors have feelings too.

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

What's another word for thesaurus?

What's the difference between ignorance, appathy, and ambivalance?
I don't know and I don't care one way or another.

*LD gets hit with a trout.*
"Hello Kitty is cool, but I like Keroppi the best."

Lizard Dude

« Reply #1 on: November 08, 2003, 10:21:24 PM »
Why does Toad get invited to all the parties?

I’m not stupid, I’m LD.

Markio

  • Normal
« Reply #2 on: November 08, 2003, 10:36:37 PM »
Because he was a fungi.  Why did Toad leave the party?  Because there wasn't mushroom!

*LD gets hit with a trout.*
"Hello Kitty is cool, but I like Keroppi the best."

Hirocon

  • June 14-16, every year
« Reply #3 on: November 08, 2003, 11:58:07 PM »
There are 10 kinds of people in this world: those who understand binary and those who don't.

Trainman

  • Bob-Omg
« Reply #4 on: November 09, 2003, 03:16:59 AM »
What happens if you don't laugh?
Formerly quite reasonable.

Luigison

  • Old Person™
« Reply #5 on: November 09, 2003, 08:44:03 AM »
Heh to Hirocon.  Well it was almost a laugh.  Maybe you have to understand binary to get it.  I do, but I didn't.
“Evolution has shaped us with perceptions that allow us to survive. But part of that involves hiding from us the stuff we don’t need to know."

Markio

  • Normal
« Reply #6 on: November 09, 2003, 09:04:21 AM »
5 out of 4 people have prblems with fractions.

How many lonely people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, but he wishes it were two.

Why do they put braille dots on the numbers of drive-up ATM machines?

*LD gets hit with a trout.*
"Hello Kitty is cool, but I like Keroppi the best."

Luigison

  • Old Person™
« Reply #7 on: November 09, 2003, 09:33:05 AM »
"Aparently 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the population."
“Evolution has shaped us with perceptions that allow us to survive. But part of that involves hiding from us the stuff we don’t need to know."

Screech

« Reply #8 on: November 09, 2003, 09:38:54 AM »
There are three kinds of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

"Walk softly and carry a Super Scope."
"At Dukar, we place our emphasis on serving you, supporting
you, and helping you be as successful as possible."

TEM

  • THE SOVIET'S MOST DANGEROUS PUZZLE.
« Reply #9 on: November 09, 2003, 09:39:45 AM »
I laughed out loud at the feminist lightbulb support group joke.

Time slowed and Reality bent.
But on and on the Eggman went.
0000

Jake

  • Mr. Manure
« Reply #10 on: November 09, 2003, 10:45:36 AM »
What do you call a snail on a ship?

---------------------------------------------

Luigi hated it when he craped his pants. Boo!
Professional Paisano here

Markio

  • Normal
« Reply #11 on: November 09, 2003, 11:44:08 AM »
A death trap, because if he falls in, he'll die from the salt water.  Just kidding.  A snailor.

*LD gets hit with a trout.*
"Hello Kitty is cool, but I like Keroppi the best."

Insane Steve

  • Professional Cynic
« Reply #12 on: November 09, 2003, 09:42:36 PM »
Ok then, "pro-" means for something, and "con-" means against something. If "progress" means "For advancement", what word happens to mean "Against advancement"?

How many members of Rainbow PUSH would it take to screw in a lightbulb?

2, one to screw it in and one to complain that the lightbulb is racist because it is white.

Stupid Quotes: (7th edition)
"To bright for drugs!" (spelling error intentional)
~On an anti-drug poster I saw in my middle school. It also had a "Red Ribbon" that was colored purple.
~I.S.~

Markio

  • Normal
« Reply #13 on: November 09, 2003, 10:03:49 PM »
What's black and white and red all over?
Everything a bull sees.

*LD gets hit with a trout.*

Edited by - Markio on 11/9/2003 8:07:11 PM
"Hello Kitty is cool, but I like Keroppi the best."

WarpRattler

  • Paid by the word
« Reply #14 on: November 10, 2003, 07:31:49 PM »
What is black, white, and red all over?(Hint: There are multiple answers.)

("o0o") My metroid thinks you are stupid. People who
...v...v disagree with metroids often get sucked dry.
Oh, and Lizard Dude:"And there was this great Food Festival! Did you know that food this and food that...."-jon
Please unban me from #tmk. Apparently, MEGAߥTE said that I''m too young to chat in there, but I''m able to post here. I don''t understand.
CATS:ALL YOUR LOWER SURFACE ARE HEARING TO US
CATS:YOU CREDIT NO PROBABILITY TO SURVIVING FORMING YOUR TIME.
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